Go tell the Outerboards, Stranger,That Here Obedient to Their Laws We Challenged Peng

[Iskander]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Geier:

First time in a year, an I'm drunk. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Bloody amateur.

For me, I'm only that way when the sun goes down. Except on weekends, of course. Then it's from when the sun comes up....

Stop elbowing in on other's territory; I'll squeeze that useless knob, pl, and re-mark it.

Jake! A Monts please! And you'd best cut off this Geier chap... you know where to cut, do you not?

[Mace]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>fleeing-cod-piece made some quote then attached himself to my leg and humped widly<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Let's see. Time is 10.02 Oz EST

Plans for the weekend:

i) Process all my PBEMs *mainly tick*

ii) Visit the pool *tick*

iii) Play rogue Spear - nope

iv) Play Fallout Tactics - nope

v) Install Europa Universalis and play - nope

vi) chat with the feline one - nope, not yet

vii) begin construction of Tamiya PzKpfw IV Ausf H - nope

viii) learn software to develop RS missions - nope

ix) watch anything military related on Oz History channel - *ongoing*

x) eat, sleep, fart, belch, piddle and poop - *as required*

xi) notice family - *when required*

Damn, fleeced-halibut

Looks like I'm flat out for the rest of my life - you'll just have to look for somewhere else to hang your bloodhamster signature.

Perhaps come back when your status improves to the point that I can pay some attention to you.

Until then, find another leg to hump!

Mace

[Speedbump]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Mace:

Plans for the weekend:

i) Process all my PBEMs *mainly tick*

ii) Visit the pool *tick*

iii) Play rogue Spear - nope

iv) Play Fallout Tactics - nope

v) Install Europa Universalis and play - nope

vi) chat with the feline one - nope, not yet

vii) begin construction of Tamiya PzKpfw IV Ausf H - nope

viii) learn software to develop RS missions - nope

ix) watch anything military related on Oz History channel - *ongoing*

x) eat, sleep, fart, belch, piddle and poop - *as required*

xi) notice family - *when required*

Mace<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Mace, please disregard 3, 4, 5, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11. Concentrate on 6, as I sense that whenever your adolescent virtual crush on Kitty is encouraged you are more active in 1 & 2. And I want my turns back quicker!

Respectfully *snigger*,

Speedbump

[MrSpkr]

Leee-oh and pantywad - if you guys have time to post here, you have time to send me a turn, you lazy bastiches.

[ 06-01-2001: Message edited by: MrSpkr ]

[bauhaus]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Stalin's Organ:

Quite true - I certainly don't feel assaulted, or even insulted.....presuming that I'm a newbie.

Rather I feel as if I've been tickled all over with a feather duster........highly appropriate from one who has chosen to name himself after a dusty and cob-web laiden relic of the Weimar Republic - a boxy, unimaginitive style which symbolses all that is putrid about peng.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Actually Mr. Penis my name is after the band, who named themselves after the movement. That and they thought it sounded cool.

[dalem]

Hey SSNs, check this out.

Let down your neck frills and unpuff your air bladders, and gather close.

Wait, hear it?

Shhhhh, hear it? Just relax a minute and listen.... hear that?

No? Well that's because for the first time in five days, you troop of diarhhetic howler monkeys aren't living up to your name! If you would just unwrap your tails from your sweaty mice and stop banging your cloven hooves against your keyboards for two bloody minutes you'd realize that sometimes, sometimes - Silence is Golden.

Especially the SSN brand of Silence.

Now in the Pool a few other things are also Golden, and that reminds me of some verse that I have mutilated for you annoying newbie wretches.

Not all that tinkles is golden

Not all those who charge you twenty bucks a pop are lost

Not everything you think of is worth posting to the Pool

And even less of it is worth reading

[dalem]

And I just have to add that Dame Achin' is still kicking my butt so badly in our current game that the only thing I've enjoyed so far is the fact that one of the bits of his last email file is the string "...XC4Wizzzzy..."

It makes me laugh when I look at it, but deep in my heart I know it's the part of the code that allows a pasty Old Worlder to destroy me. What a world.

[David Aitken]

Geier, I have not played that scenario, so hit me baby one more time... I mean... (what does that mean anyway?)... err, that would be nice sir. Neither have I heard Fretless, although I think it's on the Automatic Box that I neglected to get. I meant to get the Smashing Pumpkins' box set as well... fix or do somefink!!

Elvis has pulled an ill-gotten draw in our nocturnal Rune apocalyptic slugfest. You thought Enemy At The Gates was destructive?

This picture makes the battlefield look tame. Half the map is on fire, and a wide area on the northwestern side of the river is scattered with scores of knocked out Sherman III's, Churchill Crocodiles, Stuart V's, Ram Kangaroos, Badgers, Panthers, PzKpfw IV's, Hetzers and SPW 251's, and hundreds of dead, wounded and panicking Canadian and German infantry.

Gamey flag rush meets gamey crew rush! On the southeastern side of the river, a Firefly and two Ram Kangaroos hug the main VL, having been ordered across the bridge on the second last turn by Elvis. My crews, of course, were just taking refuge well behind friendly lines.

Most of my forces are on his side of the bridge, flanking his spearhead (if "chaotic rabble of infantry and armour desperately stumbling towards the bridge as my wounded men gnash at their ankles and pull the tracks off their tanks" counts as a "spearhead").

The computer conceded a draw to him, but gave me a knowing nudge with a 51-43 score in my favour.

Now, in other matters... Panzer Leader has e-mailed me begging for a game. This man knows no pity, and I think we should all be very wary of his presence. I am inclined to agree to his request and put him down quickly, as such a pathetic creature should not be left to suffer.

[MrPeng]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Mace:

Let's see. Time is 10.02 Oz EST

Plans for the weekend:

i) Process all my PBEMs *mainly tick*

ii) Visit the pool *tick*

iii) Play rogue Spear - nope

iv) Play Fallout Tactics - nope

v) Install Europa Universalis and play - nope

vi) chat with the feline one - nope, not yet

vii) begin construction of Tamiya PzKpfw IV Ausf H - nope

viii) learn software to develop RS missions - nope

ix) watch anything military related on Oz History channel - *ongoing*

x) eat, sleep, fart, belch, piddle and poop - *as required*

xi) notice family - *when required*

Damn, fleeced-halibut

Looks like I'm flat out for the rest of my life - you'll just have to look for somewhere else to hang your bloodhamster signature.

Perhaps come back when your status improves to the point that I can pay some attention to you.

Until then, find another leg to hump!

Mace<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Oh, Mace.

You have let the side down with your enumerating. it isn't the content so much that I argue with, and as you know I will argue with a spoon about rogering field mice if it suits me, it is the actual sequential numbering of the content that has me up in arms. by god you have sequentially with small ROMAN nvmerals, listed a bunch of semi related things starting with the smallest integer and increasing by one whole number until you reached the end of the list! WHAT IN THE BLOODY HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!?

for your edification, and edumacation, i will present hereafter correct pooligan envmerating with edited content thusly:

11. Process all my PBEMs *mainly tick*

ii. Visit the pool *tick*

B. Flog SSNs with pointy things

42> Play Fallout Tactics - nope

!. Set fire to SSNs

X. chat with the chatte - nope, not yet

5) begin construction of Tamiya PzKpfw IV Ausf H - nope

b. learn software to turn SSNs into quivering piles of wombat poo *tick*

9< watch anything military related on Oz History channel - *ongoing*

4.0 a. eat, ii.sleep, 6.fart, 37.belch, 22(piddle and poop) - on SSNs *as required*

22) notice family - *when required*

There. Its really quite simple and I am extremely disappointed that you did not recognizing your error and gouge your eyes out with the sharpened femur of a gutted, dressed and roasted SSN.

My GOD Macey! even the loathesome transplanted Kentucky Irish PoS ICKY knows pooligan enumeration. Very disappointed indeed. As I said the content only needed a tweak here and there, but really...sad sad sad state of affaires when one must barge in and remind an old kanigget of the true ways.

Now All is forgiven, carry on.

[Stalin's Organ]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by bauhaus:

Actually Mr. Penis my name is after the band, who named themselves after the movement. That and they thought it sounded cool.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Ahh.....so you name yourself after those who never had to talent to write songs themselves...prefering instead to make dark, moody copies of others fine efforts.

An excellent allegory!

Do you have any more talent or imagination than your namesakes??

[Mace]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Edited and resposted by Mace:

Let's see. Time is 10.02 Oz EST

Plans for the weekend:

ix) Process all my PBEMs *mainly tick*

A: Visit the pool *tick*

alpha/ Play rogue Spear - nope

==> Play Fallout Tactics - nope

22.2.1: Install Europa Universalis and play - nope

99) chat with the feline one - nope, not yet

3.1416.... begin construction of Tamiya PzKpfw IV Ausf H - nope

Chapter 66: learn software to develop RS missions - nope

WOOT!: watch anything military related on Oz History channel - *ongoing*

(this space for rent) eat, sleep, fart, belch, piddle and poop - *as required*

nb. notice family - *when required*

Damn, fleeced-halibut

Looks like I'm flat out for the rest of my life - you'll just have to look for somewhere else to hang your bloodhamster signature.

Perhaps come back when your status improves to the point that I can pay some attention to you.

Until then, find another leg to hump!

Mace<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I bow to your wisdom Peng, while making sure that Bauhaus doesn't spot my rear, and have posted the revised post above for your consideration.

I will now adopt the Peng method of point notation at work...this will no doubt lead to the collapse of the current State Government, the rejection of the Commonwealth Government by the voters, and the end of civilisation as we know it.

But hey, that's their problem, not ours!

Mace

[ 06-01-2001: Message edited by: Mace ]

[MrSpkr]

A quick update:

In the Berli-designed mega cold game from heck I am playing against Its-kandy-little-boy-get-in-the-car, we have now managed to populate a single house with over 90 dead bodies.

Note that he has managed to lose over sixty guys, while I have only lost about 25. Good exchange ratio, no?

Now, if we could only set it on fire, then blow it up . . .

[ 06-01-2001: Message edited by: MrSpkr ]

[Mace]

Oh Mr sneakers....fix your bloody link!!!!

Mace

[MrSpkr]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Mace:

Oh Mr sneakers....fix your bloody link!!!!

Mace<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

It is fixed, you silly Aussie roo-romper. Perhaps your monitor's vertical amplitude transducer is dirty. It is quite simple to clean. Take your monitor to your bathroom. Fill the bathtub with hot, soapy water. Plug in your monitor and turn it on(otherwise, how will you know whether it is fixed yet?). Remove your shoes and socks (don't want to get them wet, do we?). Stand in the bathtub, feet wedged against either side of the bath tub for balance. Hold the monitor by either side, with the front portion (where you normally see the pretty pictures) facing you. Immerse monitor into bath water and shake vigourously. Repeat as necessary.

Oh, no need to thank me. Just trying to help.

[ 06-01-2001: Message edited by: MrSpkr ]

[Mace]

MrSpkr,

I followed your instructions!

Ummm...is it supposed to smoke like that?

Mace

[Iskander]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by MrSpkr:

A quick update: In the Berli-designed mega cold game from heck I am playing against The Noble Iskander... *picture*<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Interesting. You've got the trees "turned off" and have not identified certain sections of my forces... thanks for intel, moron.

2318 hours: Bushmills with a splash of Irish Mist... g'night all!

[MrSpkr]

Mace-

If it is smoking, you aren't getting it clean enough. You need to add more warm soapy water, hold the monitor firmly to your chest and sit down, leaning backwards unil the monitor is fully immersed.

Whiskinghandinthecar-

Don't be so sure. If I'm the moron, why am I wiping the floor with your pathetic Ami troops. My goodness, in that building alone one platoon has held off an entire company. If this is your idea of tactical genius, please, by all means, keep it up.

[ 06-01-2001: Message edited by: MrSpkr ]

[Panzer Leader]

Hey Spkr f th Hs its YOUR turn, or uh mebbe wanna send it over again, tee-hee.

((I love that 'tee-hee' thing. It's my new internet giggle.))

[Berlichtingen]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Panzer Leader:

I have a theory. With the leaking info on CM2 beginning to appear, the "old guard" is becoming restless. They fear that, as often happens to people of the retirement age, they have become set in their way, and will not be able to grasp the subtle differences of this "new-fangled game." Much like the rosy-cheeked expectations of a year before, there is a hush in the air. On the tip of everyone's tongue is "Russia...".

But to the squires, SSN's and even outerboardes, the word is whispered in anticipation. But, alas, like many a dynasty (even Russia's) who has witnessed its rise and decline, so the Kanigget's tongue has not a sweet jewel, but a tart pill. "Russia..." with dread and a hopeless sense of loss.

...Berlichtingen You will become the new mascot of the "Second Ping Thread" (notice revised spelling) and will be forced to wear a teddy-bear costume and give candy out to the scum sucking newbies.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Eh? What's that you said sonny? Gotta speak up... my hearing ain't so good as it used ta be...

I see Pawbroon hasn't taught his squire (festering boil on the ass of Mace's favorite sheep) to respect his elders...

So I guess its up to the rest of us ancients to teach him to respect his BETTERS!

Sir Knights!,

A scenario if you please

Forget that... I have a Der Kessel original here in need of testing

[ 06-02-2001: Message edited by: Berlichtingen ]

[Seanachai]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by MrSpkr:

Phillies you phlipping phailure. It's all your phault these phreaking phools phell into our phine thread. You phorgot and phed the trolls, you phungus. Now we are phorced to listen to these phecal phreeloading pheatherbrained buphphoons phlirt like some sort oph phemale phreshman at her phirst phraternity phling!

Phorget my challenge to Dame Shaw phor the moment. I challenge you, you ephpheminate bottom pheeder. Your overinphlated opinion oph yourselph needs to be taken down a bit, you phreakish phop. Send me a setup posthaste!<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

My dear Squire. Never do this thing with 'ph' again. It is quite horrible, and not to be born. On second thought, never mangle language like this again. It's not a consonant thing, it's about the beauty of language itself. Phan has his own demons to answer to.

[Mace]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Berlichtingen:

(festering boil on the ass of Mace's favorite sheep) ---> in reference to Pansy Lady<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Sir Berlichtingen,

Do you think it should be lanced?

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Pansy Lady's blasphemy continues:

But, alas, like many a dynasty (even Russia's) who has witnessed its rise and decline, so the Kanigget's tongue has not a sweet jewel, but a tart pill. "Russia..." with dread and a hopeless sense of loss.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Tell me your joking?

I live Eastern front, I have been playing Eastern Front miniatures, board games and computer games since when you last pooped your nappy (last week wasn't it)!

I buy books and videos about the Eastern Front. My models are based on units that participated in various Eastern Front battles.

Having CM2 on my PC will be equivalent to a continual multiple-orgasm lasting for at least a month.

I for one, am looking forward to CM2 with some eager anticipation, and I look forward to driving back and forward over your festering body with a IS2, Ferdinand/Elefant, KV2 or ISU152 for muttering such blasphemy!!!

Mace

[ 06-02-2001: Message edited by: Mace ]

[Stuka]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Mace:

I look forward to driving back and forward over your festering body with a IS2, Ferdinand/Elefant, KV2 or ISU152 <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Not to mention getting his soviet tank dog to crap in your gaping pie hole.

Opps, not supposed to mention that!

Tee-hee. 'Oops' again.

[Simon Fox]

Apologies for the intrusion. Just placing the cesspool over that excremental justice bloke.

*smashes hole in base of cesspool*

There that should do it.

Sure you guys will manage to fill it up again quickly enough.

Seeya.

[Phillies Phan]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Seanachai:

My dear Squire. Never do this thing with 'ph' again. It is quite horrible, and not to be born. On second thought, never mangle language like this again. It's not a consonant thing, it's about the beauty of language itself. Phan has his own demons to answer to.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Sir Seanachai, I ask mercy as you punish your squire. He sincerely beleived that I speak that way. I also ask that you gird him up with strong tactics and maneouvers. Take him aside each day and teach him how to not play like me. Take the mistakes you made while tutoring me and harvest a better crop of squires. Keep my picture up in your outhouse and remember that we are all mortal and feces jokes are always fun.

One major demon of mine has been recently purged and it's a huge weight off my mind. I can now go back to eating normally and going outside. Will my CM gameplay improve? Probably not. It would seem the influence of both Moriarty and Seanachai early in my career have brought irreparable harm to my tactics. This is where Mark IV grumbles "tactics? what tactics?"

[MrSpkr]

*** grovelling ***

"Mercy!!"

*** cowers ***

"Mercy!"

*** averting eyes ***

"I apologize most humbly m'lord. I merely responded on an intellectual level I thought Fillies could comprehend."

"In atonement for my sins, I shall bring you his steaming innards on a platter and mount his slckjawed, wide-eyed head on a pike at the entrance to the beloved Pool to serve as a warning to, well, anyone who needs a warning."

"Whats that? For what do I think you would need or want his steaming innards? Well, You could use them to flail the most clueless, inept and ignorant (yes m'lord, a redundancy, forgive me) knave in the land. In fact, there's this InfernalPustulence guy . . ."

[ 06-02-2001: Message edited by: MrSpkr ]