Have you no Challenge, Peng? At long last, have you left no Challenge?

[Hakko Ichiu]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Geier:

Lies, damn lies, private communications shamelessly exposed for all to see, lies, and more lies plus a pinch or two of sheer idiocy (OK, not just a pinch or two; more like several hogsheads and a bushel basket).

<hr></blockquote>

The facts in this case are simple.

Q) I was playing a scenario called Kommerscheidt. Geier was commiting mass pixelocide on his own troops.

Aleph-Null) I inadvertently opened the wrong file. Upon seeing the words "Enter Axis Password", I immediately attempted to abort the file (a fate it richly deserved, I might add). Instead, and by sheer chance, the file opened, and I saw his troop dispositions in all their raw ineptitude. I could not avert my eyes in time; it was too late; the damage was done.

42) Being, as I am, a man of honor, a Knigget of the Pool sans peur et sans reproche, I immediately informed the hapless Swede that although I would like nothing better than to shred him into noisome chunks of surströmming -- and I was going to anyway -- honor forbade that I do so now.

ß) I then gave him the choice: die like a dog in this scenario, or die like a dog in another. He chose the latter option.

I am, gentles, more sinned against than sinning. If I am guilty of anything, it is of being too honorable. In fact, now that I think about it, I should have just shredded the little weasel and had done with him. Honestly, who in their right mind has a password that can be cracked by the accidental combination of a couple of keystrokes and a bronchial cough? Really.

So, heigh ho, it's off to tear Geier a new one I go. On a map from Germanboy, no less - and how much less could there be than the Teutonic one?

And, as punishment for publishing our correspondence, no Grog Porn™ for you.

{Edited and you know why, don't you}

[ 11-18-2001: Message edited by: Hakko Ichiu ]</p>

[Andreas]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Hakko Ichiu:

[QB]On a map from Germanboy, no less - and how much less could there be than the Teutonic one? <hr></blockquote>

A lot less.

Now, for 999% of the nitwits frequenting this thread, the above line would have constituted what they see as a 'witty' response. They would then have proceeded to edit it, because they are incapable of spelling 'a' without resorting to Chambers, lying on their lap while typing their inane drivel, like a smelly, dank poodle, reflecting their state of mind when drooling on their legs.

That is what is wrong with you lot. Not to put too fine a point on it, you stink as taunters. You once were great, and you look at the image of what you once were, thinking 'Yeah, that was so cool, like, woohey' or something. Now, you are but shallow shadows of yourselves, who are so shortsighted that they see a witty, bright, and lucid response in the pointless crap being spouted forth here these days. If I did not dislike you so much for that, I would pity you. Instead I entertain thoughts that involve you, and a lawnmower. But we won't go there.

If the words 'stale', 'clubby', and 'outlived its usefulness', as well as 'well past it's sell-by date' did not exist, someone would have to invent them for the Peng Thread these days.

Morons. Read 'The emperor's new clothes' - you may just learn something.

BTW Ethan - a long time before this game is over, you will curse me. Oh yes you will.

Not edited because I am worth it.

[Mace]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Geier:

It's probably because I lack your special grasp of how to use exclamation marks! If only I could work that one out, I'd be brilliant!<hr></blockquote>

Too right! Exclamation mark usage is a skill best left to we professionals!!!

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>You, are an idiot!<hr></blockquote>

And you, Sir, are a Swede!

[Stuka]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Germanboy:

Read 'The emperor's new clothes' - you may just learn something.

<hr></blockquote>

Does it have a glossy centrefold?

[Speedy]

Ooooohhhh, I hope so.

[Leeo]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Stuka:

Does it have a glossy centrefold?<hr></blockquote>

I think Seanachai has a glossy center to his folds.

(And it's spelled "center" up here on the top (i.e. correct) side of the planet. Whelp.)

[OGSF]

Waill Ah faill waill an' trooly blaised Ah do! A Swede, a Sneeze an' a feckin' Teutonic Nose Bleed cam trundlin' ain moonted on their 20 gallon drrrum hobby horses, an' wavin' their smelly private bits aboot tae frighten tha' local floaters!

Af'n tha three o' thaim an' Joe Ah cudnae plah ye just noo cos Ah'm a ferret's bladder ainfection Shaw were tae bend doon an' twist tae tha right, tha cud form a never endin' scrum.

At'd bae sad af'n at weren't sae predictable....tha Three Mutual Tossers cam prancin' ain here on tha balls o' their wee pink feet aivery six months tae piss an' moan lak Maggy Thatcher a' a John Majors tupperware party.

Rather an' bother wi' tha stankin' "Emperors Oh Sae Sheer Underpants", ye cud di worrse than glance at tha feckin' story aboot some chicken tha baked a soddin' cake an' nae bastarrd wud hailp 'till at were bleedin' finished an' thain tha cam belly achin' aboot lookin' fer a piece....or sum such ****e. Ask Seanachai, he reads.

Ah'd ainvite ye tae taunt sumthin', boot Ah reckon ye pockmarked haids wud cave ain. As ye'd expaict fra' three unahdentafeed slippery bits ain a leper's pie crust.

Snot-gobblin' bastaarrdds.

SirMacOberGruppenBloodyStompinSicFeuhrerBastardABCDJimmy

[Stuka]

N'er a truer word spoken....I think.

Those were words weren't they OFSG?

[MrPeng]

Gentleworms:

I have returned from my sojourn in The Desert, where I suckled at the teats of the high tech elite and came away thirsty for real nourishment. The baubles and trinkets they toss off at CIOs may sparkle the eyes of the suits, but the poor bastards who actually have to make all the crap work together are not fooled. Oh, we'll take their little clips and cups and gadgets and gizmos and useless trialware and t-shirts espousing the grandness of their latest inventions, but we do not beleive a word of what they tell us.

The CIO's on the other hand - dazzled by every "pearl" that drips from the mouths of keynotes - they buy it all. Every whirr and click and pointless "feature" that no one has the time inclination or need to learn; The CIOs buy em. Thank god they don't stay for the entire event.

If you happen to be saddled with a particular brand of CIO - {oh hell let's be frank (or shirly if you are so inclined) - the Canadian kind of CIO who orders the most expensive steak in the joint and asks for it "medium well" and then THEN stiffs the staff with a 12% tip. My God the HORROR! It burns us! It BURNS US!} if you are saddled with such a beast, you begin to wonder if you can go to work again on Monday.

"What did you learn at COMDEX?"

Weeeelllll, I learned that you are a cheap bastard who likes to ruin perfectly good slabs of cattle with overcooking: that you are such a stick in the mud that you wont have a single goddam beer or glass of wine with your dinner: that you have not a clue about what constitutes good software or what is useful and neccessary. In a nut, you can't tell the difference between ****e and shinola, your arse from your elbow or your willie from a doorknob. You are a worthless empty suit and should be sent packing off back to Canada - feh!- post haste, tout suite, ON THE DOUBLE. That's what I learned in Las Vegas. What did you learn? That Micro$haft thinks they might have gotten it right, at long last? That the latest new wireless gizmo is even smaller and more difficult to operate than last years? that is if you have fingers larger than those of a five year old girl? Very good, you get a cookie.

I also learned that it is a very bad idea to try to mix "family fun" with the devil's own front line troops. I don't get the idea at all. I would NEVER bring my children to that city of sin and avarice and plastic. At least not until they are old enough to drink and gamble and shove money into g-strings and spend a night in the drunk tank. Amusement park rides in the hotel? Please. Let Mr Disney take care of the family fun somewhere else. I don't want someone's kid looking at me while I am staggering to my room with my pants around my ankles and lipstick on my undies.

{Well, my kids are used to it, but you get the idea.}

Lastly, I think GB is right. Time to put this thread - this whole series of threads - out of our misery.

Peng

[Moriarty]

Nice to see the cranky ol' sodder hasn't lost the old touch.

You got to feel a bit sorry for his wee Spaniel, though. Probably got a couple of swift kicks with a Scottish hobnail while he was composing that load o' Jabberwocky.

[ 11-19-2001: Message edited by: Moriarty ]</p>

[Moriarty]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by MrPeng:

Lastly, I think GB is right. Time to put this thread - this whole series of threads - out of our misery.

Peng<hr></blockquote>

Then do it ... it's your thread.

[MrPeng]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Moriarty:

Then do it ... it's your thread.<hr></blockquote>

OK! I DECLARE THE MBT DEAD. I wash my hands of any involvement in Future MBTs or Peng Challenge threads, and will sic my attornies on any who begin another thread with my name in it.

nyah!

[OGSF]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by MrPeng:

OK! I DECLARE THE MBT DEAD. I wash my hands of any involvement...(blah)..(blah)..(blah)....

nyah!<hr></blockquote>

Ah think mah wee span'l just farrted agin.

SirMOGBSSFBABCDJ

[Joe Shaw]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Moriarty:

Then do it ... it's your thread.<hr></blockquote>

Damnit Moriarty do we need to schedule another session on the rack for you? There are only two things Pengish about this thread, (e) It has his name in the header and (2.54 cm = 1 in. +-) He posts here at times. Clearly the quality of his posts is lacking BUT we can usually understand the words ... more than you can say for OGSF after all.

But ... IT AIN'T HIS THREAD!

Joe

[Berlichtingen]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by MrPeng:

OK! I DECLARE THE MBT DEAD. I wash my hands of any involvement in Future MBTs or Peng Challenge threads, and will sic my attornies on any who begin another thread with my name in it.

nyah!<hr></blockquote>

Outstanding! 'Bout time you killed it

[chrisl]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by MrPeng:

Woot

<hr></blockquote>

Bah. You tried that once before, and it had no effect. It might even have increased the quality and quantity of posts for a short time.

The problem is that this thing has taken on a life of its own, self propagating and oozing along, much like a slime mold, or the stuff that you left in the refrigerator too long, or the gunk that grows between your toes. A slime mold is a bunch of ostensibly identical cells all in a nasty icky sheet (from the point of view outside the slime mold) but somehow the cells organize and form little buds that then emit spores (or some appoximation thereof). This is much like the operation of the MBT. It's gone completely amok, and if it weren't for the fungicidal properties of a certain mad bald one, would take over the whole board, which, given much of dreck out there, might not be such a bad thing.

You're just in a bad mood because there wasn't any good schwag at comdex (I just had dinner with some people who went and were disappointed at how small it's gotten (bauhaus, you know the drill)) and that Las Vegas has become a third order approximation of Disneyland, where the differences are now a few decimal places in. The all you can eat buffets are now more than $5, and you can't even eat that much anymore because you spend too much time in a chair and are slowly beginning to be shaped like one.

What you really need is to kneel down in front of the porcelain god and have a good session of emitting all the food you stuffed yourself with today. Then stick your head in, inhale, and flush. It will make you feel much better.

[Mace]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by MrPeng:

OK! I DECLARE THE MBT DEAD. I wash my hands of any involvement in Future MBTs or Peng Challenge threads, and will sic my attornies on any who begin another thread with my name in it.

<hr></blockquote>

Sorry, but it's an albatross that looks very nice draped around your neck.

And since it causes you so much discomfort, a very good reason to keep it going for perpituity!

Mace

PS smiley added to really annoy Peng

[Speedy]

So what's the next title?

Peng is dead but let's challenge the bastard anyway ?

[Berlichtingen]

Sir Joe Shaw

You sir, are an idiot. How dare you say this is not Peng's thread? You, the Just-A-Car, dare to trample on the sacred traditions of the Mutha Beatiful Thread? This is unacceptable! draw steel and defend yourself, knave.

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Speedy:

So what's the next title?

Peng is dead but let's challenge the bastard anyway ?<hr></blockquote>

Peng has ended this farce. Let no mention of Peng appear in the new thread (better yet, let there be no new thread)

[Hakko Ichiu]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Berlichtingen:

Sir Joe Shaw

You sir, are an idiot. How dare you say this is not Peng's thread? You, the Just-A-Car, dare to trample on the sacred traditions of the Mutha Beatiful Thread? This is unacceptable! draw steel and defend yourself, knave.

Peng has ended this farce. Let no mention of Peng appear in the new thread (better yet, let there be no new thread)<hr></blockquote>

No, you are incorrect. It's a mutha-beautiful thread and it will always be there! No matter how patheticly, incoherently gorbaled it becomes.

QED

[MrPeng]

Wrongo, hosebags. It is dead. I disavow it. The MBT is no more. This one, the next one and any others are no longer allowed to be. Done. Finished. Kaput. POOF! all gone bye bye.

I say we start the eternal "Shaw's a complete Mook, let's ignore him" thread and leave me entirely out of it.

I saw the light at COMDEX. I Will be buying an XBOX and playing twitch games from now on. Mr Gates will be getting 100% of my entertainment dollar in perpetuity. Hell, I signed a contract that sez my KIDS have to buy all of their toys and software from him too. Long live the twitch. Down with CM!

Peng (who will no longer be known as "Peng" but "Gates-slut" from here on.)

Gates-slut

edited to point out the use of the non-word "sez" and to add this:

There. That should do it. Down with the Peng Challenge!

Message edited by Gates-slut

[ 11-19-2001: Message edited by: MrPeng ]</p>

[Andreas]

You know, some of you sorry and bedraggled lot make the later Byzanine Empire appear to be a model of vitality. Peng comes along and says something righteous for a change, and some of you delve into semantics ('It's not your thread' 'T'is too') on Kindergarten level, while others start debating the next thread title. So much for creativity - what was that about a camel being a horse designed by a committee? If ever there was proof needed that the laws of thermodynamics apply in the social sphere, you would be it.

Dragging the lot of you out in the courtyard and having you shot together with a bunch of Railtrack shareholders would be cruel on the Railtrack shareholders. You are beyond pitiable. Shame you are beyond taunting as well - since, oh well, since about 9 months give or take. Which should give you something to think about, if you were only capable of doing so. In the time it takes a woman to produce one of these little bundles of poo and vomit, or was that joy, you have not managed a single decent post.

Drag this Peng thread idea out into the garden, and bury it in a shallow grave. Do yourselves a favour.

Alternatively - have a look at my last ten posts here in this thread. Should give you an idea of what venom could be. And then bury the thread in a shallow grave.

Not edited to show off my brilliance.

[chrisl]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Germanboy:

You know, some of you sorry and bedraggled lot make the later Byzanine Empire appear to be a model of vitality.

.

.

.

Not edited to show off my brilliance.<hr></blockquote>

That ought to read Byzantine.

[imported_Hiram Sedai]

Gentleworms, I must tender my opinion on this weighty matter of idiocy demonstrated by the geriatric masses. When each of you admit that you are, indeed, toothless old men who enjoy tag team prostate tickling exercises in Minnesota and bars in Washington DC, then you will come to the same conclusion that I have. The thread must die. Granted, Seanachai has soft hands and I know that because I conversed with the Pod myself. He squirmed and salivated when he remembered his trip to the Bard's love hovel.

To those of you who showed me mercy during my sad Combat Mission struggles, I say "thank you". To the rest, I hope your scrotums fall off. I thrive on thingy references.

To quote my hero; Capt James T. Kirk...

"It was fun"

[Andreas]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by chrisl:

That ought to read Byzantine.<hr></blockquote>

I do not make mistakes, I set new styles.

Now, if that is the best you can do, it shows quite clearly all that is wrong with this place. I go around insulting you bunch of lackadaisical nitwits with the intellectual depth of a Venetian canal barge at will, and all you can come up with is point out a typo. Well done, have a biscuit. What is this? The UBB version of the 'I'm so cute tickle my belly' response to being called to task for immense stupidity? I have seen chopped off decaying trees with more interesting life in them than this thread contains, me excepted.

Jesus Christ on a feckin' crutch!