Joe Shaw Posted January 30, 2001 Share Posted January 30, 2001 So ... Shyster ... sorry, Lawyer are you like ... Newt's younger brother or what? BTW, congrats on being made a squire, and as Catch 22 had it "It doesn't mean anything, it just means you're a squire." As to the other new squires ... go play in a corner ... not that one, that's Blousehouse's and well ... best not play there. As to the new KNIGHTS OF THE CESSPOOL ... well met and welcome to the defenders of ... uh ... well ... Joe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mace Posted January 30, 2001 Share Posted January 30, 2001 Originally posted by jd: Noticed some new photos....... Mace: Hmmm can Donny Osmond be far behind. I’ll have you know I won a $5.00 bet for growing that. I got an additional $10.00 to shave it off. And it was my meagre salute to that fine cricketer and my hero, Merve Hughes (do a search)! Once I get off my arse and find a more recent photo (my wife keeps burning them, or tearing them up! I don’t know why. <=/ ), I’ll send it in! Originally posted by Lorak: With that being said. The following people have proven themselves worthy of becoming full members of the pool. Stuka, Mace, Croda, Bastables, Speedy, Jshandorf, PeterNZ, Kitty Well, I can see that two of the above are fine additions to the cesspool chapter of mighty Kiniggits, but I wonder about what drugs you were taking Lorak, when you admitted the rest? Also....Hmmm, a bit low in the squire Department! I was hoping for someone to rub and buff my large Mace. Any chance of having them on a rotational basis? Btw, how do we address Kitty? Should I say “Sir Kitty”, or “hey you, time for my whipping”? Sir Mace, Keeper of a illegal copy of the Royal sheep-pen key Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted January 30, 2001 Share Posted January 30, 2001 Btw, how do we address Kitty? Should I say “Sir Kitty”, or “hey you, time for my whipping”? You Ozzie goof, no wonder the Pommies tried to get rid of you lot. The PROPER term of address for a female knight is DAME ... as in ... wait for it ... There is nothing like a dame ... Now get busy and send me a turn. Joe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mace Posted January 30, 2001 Share Posted January 30, 2001 Originally posted by Joe Shaw: The PROPER term of address for a female knight is DAME ... as in ... wait for it ... There is nothing like a dame ... Now get busy and send me a turn. Joe Correction. That should be There is nothing like a Dame with a large stock whip Dame Kitty, huh? Hmmmmm! As for that turn stuff, I'm at work...so nyaaaaaah! Mace [This message has been edited by Mace (edited 01-29-2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitty Posted January 30, 2001 Share Posted January 30, 2001 Originally posted by stevetherat: • I have chosen this platform to declare war on Kitty's Hamster Youth army. Shortly, I will conduct interviews with my Army Chicks™®© and post them on my site, along with full colour nude photographs of the chicks in various military poses. Address to follow in due time. Sorry, mouse. Your "original" idea has already been done. See Warphead's "Chicks With Tanks" and my Female 3D CM Face Replacement mod. Screenshots available elsewhere on this board. =P Kitty ------------------ Hamsters at War! Chicks With Tanks Lorak's FTX "I'd rather the Bees than your Mask of Shame." - Stuka The True Blue Aussie Slang Source The Unofficial Vic Bitter Website Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandorf Posted January 30, 2001 Share Posted January 30, 2001 Originally posted by Mace: I’ll have you know I won a $5.00 bet for growing that. I got an additional $10.00 to shave it off. And it was my meagre salute to that fine cricketer and my hero, Merve Hughes (do a search)! Once I get off my arse and find a more recent photo (my wife keeps burning them, or tearing them up! I don’t know why. <=/ ), I’ll send it in! Geezus, Mace! You look like an extra from Saturday Night Fever! Say it ain't so! Also that picture of Bauhaus... Hmmmm... Do I see pedophile tendances in that wicked grin? And who is the Lawyer character? jd you spineless worm did someone cut you in half? Weren't they aware of you a-sexual reproduction? Fools! Seanchai you long winded git. We have not crossed flaccid thingies in a while. Why don't you send a setup my way? Oh and Goanna tell us, how bad was the ass kickin' that guy gave you, when he saw you sitting on his bike? Jeff ------------------ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitty Posted January 30, 2001 Share Posted January 30, 2001 Originally posted by Joe Shaw: I thought it was broad. I could be mistaken though. Kitty ------------------ Hamsters at War! Chicks With Tanks Lorak's FTX "I'd rather the Bees than your Mask of Shame." - Stuka The True Blue Aussie Slang Source The Unofficial Vic Bitter Website Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roborat Posted January 30, 2001 Share Posted January 30, 2001 Hey Lorak,(and others) just a thought from a lowly Squire (and thanks a lot for changing the rules by the way, -note heavy sarcasm, now I just have to have a few more pool games, instead of that map from hell I'm playing foobar on??), anyway, I have noticed that Slapdragon has started showing up lately, (likely as refuge from his royal 3rd person Rexford), and some of his posts weren't grogly at all. I think he should be rewarded by being awarded kniggithood also, I think he deserves it as much as some of the other recent inductees (draftees??), and it would serve him right for showing up in here. And by the way, if it matters, Meeks is my sponsor, it's not noted on your board. If memory serves, I was the first one sponsored. ------------------ "With cat-like tread, Upon our prey we steal; In silence dread, Our cautious way we feel." -G&S Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted January 30, 2001 Share Posted January 30, 2001 Hey RR, it takes more than just showing up and playing a few games to be made a KNIGHT OF THE ONE THE TRUE CESSPOOL. Where are the taunts, the slurs, the lies and, most importantly, the pathetic attempts at humor? Slappy MAY well have what it takes to be a 'pooler, but so far he's got a long way to go to prove that he's not a {shudder} Grog. And all those posts to the main board, frankly, hurt his chances for acceptance in THIS group. Sure we venture out now and then, but only to make fun of cretins like Gunny Bunny. Joe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted January 30, 2001 Share Posted January 30, 2001 Originally posted by Lorak: New Pictures up: ...Bauhaus... My God! Sit down and put a bag over your head! With that being said. The following people have proven themselves worthy of becoming full members of the pool. Stuka Mace Croda Bastables Speedy Jshandorf PeterNZ Kitty Yes to Stuka, Croda, Bastables, Speedy, Jshandorf and PeterNZ Of course to Kitty As for that whelp Mace... he's kitty's toy, let her decide Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lorak Posted January 30, 2001 Share Posted January 30, 2001 Ahh.. Roborat. It is nice to see the Dawn of Hope raise head in a squire...before I step on it. First Slapdragon.... Umm, he has showed up before.. and like this time I give him a couple days, before he leaves again. Really not worth my trouble to change a page for a grog passing in the night. As for you... Lets see. Posting and contributing to the thread. I have you posting to the Cesspool the following days (yes, I have no life). 10/12 almost 2 months pass... 12/01 Then you cut it in half to a month. 1/05 then you cut it in half again to 2 weeks 1/16 now again down to 1 week 1/23 now to a little less than a week 1/29 As you can see.. you are getting a lot better. But not quite there yet. As for games... 5 sounded like a good number. But you must have both games and presence. Lorak the loathed ------------------ "Do not wait to strike till the iron is hot; but make it hot by striking."--William Butler Yeats Cesspool Combatmissionclub Lorak's FTX and for Kitty's sake =^..^= Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nijis Posted January 30, 2001 Share Posted January 30, 2001 Mister Lorak, please be advised of the following qb result: nijis - win PeterNZer - loss It was fine sport. After swiftly disposing of his Panthers, we cheerly pursued his infantry over hill and dale as hearty antipodean lads might pursue a coy ewe. I believe I also reported a victory against Croda a week or so back that failed to get Tomed properly. In other news, after spending nearly half the game contemplating what fine victory flags we'd managed to procur without so much as fraying an earlobe, we have at last caught sight of the elusive dalem, and have begun conducting field observations. We are now testing its reaction to mortar fire, and we'll hopefully be able to submit a report to the Cesspuddlian Geographical Society on its capacity to charge uphill through a crossfire. In less happy news, MacStompie the alphabet guy, who seems to accumulate surnames faster than a third-rate Circassian Mamluke, appears to have repulsed my final counterattack. A real game for the ages it was. He learned that packing your troops in three squads to the tile in a grove of trees might not be the wisest idea if the other guy's got mortars. I learned that it's probably a good idea to put your big guns on the same side of the map where the flags are. ------------------ "I can't listen to music too often... It makes me want to say kind, stupid things, and pat the heads of people... But now you have to beat them on the head, beat them without mercy." V. I. Lenin Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted January 30, 2001 Share Posted January 30, 2001 As for games... 5 sounded like a good number. But you must have both games and presence. And may I suggest that the quality of the presence be taken into account as well. As I previously mentioned, just showing up shouldn't be sufficient, are we to grade on the curve? Are we to give a grade just for answering the roll? I think the entire tradition of the 'pool cries out against such a travesty. As to the games, that's a different story, as has been conclusively proven, it's not the quality of the play that counts, merely the play itself ... it's kind of a zen thing. Joe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slapdragon Posted January 30, 2001 Share Posted January 30, 2001 Originally posted by Lorak: Ahh.. Roborat. It is nice to see the Dawn of Hope raise head in a squire...before I step on it. First Slapdragon.... Umm, he has showed up before.. and like this time I give him a couple days, before he leaves again. Really not worth my trouble to change a page for a grog passing in the night. As for you... Lets see. Posting and contributing to the thread. I have you posting to the Cesspool the following days (yes, I have no life). Lorak I see how it is now. Lorak shivers in his boots because I can stand in as both Grog and Cesspooler, fighting evil and tyranny on the outside while defeating all who battle me on the inside. Well, as a Knight of my own order, who invented Hamstertruppen and set Kitty off on her rampage, who contributed before my untimely illness, to the mess that is cess, who is dispised by flameboys and munchkingirls alike for his truly amazing ability to sling **** and show truth with a single sword of redemption, I am neither ready nor unready to Cesspool. The question see, is not if the I am ready for Knighthood, but if knighthood is ready for me! So, defender of forests, speaker for trees, collector of dog urine and big green flees. I will knight myself of the order of goathead, protector of the realm of carolina, wizard grognard and warrior duke of an order of one. I will accept squires at my table, and warriors in my clan, and one day, if Darwin is correct, the Cesspool will be suitable for me! Flock to the banner oh dispossed squires with good hearts, who are tired on tyranny. You need not choose a like as a square peg, come join with me! [This message has been edited by Slapdragon (edited 01-29-2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lorak Posted January 30, 2001 Share Posted January 30, 2001 Nijis, Games in the Tome are so noted. Lorak the loathed ------------------ "Do not wait to strike till the iron is hot; but make it hot by striking."--William Butler Yeats Cesspool Combatmissionclub Lorak's FTX and for Kitty's sake =^..^= Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slapdragon Posted January 30, 2001 Share Posted January 30, 2001 Originally posted by Joe Shaw: And may I suggest that the quality of the presence be taken into account as well. As I previously mentioned, just showing up shouldn't be sufficient, are we to grade on the curve? Are we to give a grade just for answering the roll? I think the entire tradition of the 'pool cries out against such a travesty. As to the games, that's a different story, as has been conclusively proven, it's not the quality of the play that counts, merely the play itself ... it's kind of a zen thing. Joe Ah Joe, you fear me as they feared Merlin. Poor deluded soul. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted January 30, 2001 Share Posted January 30, 2001 Flock to the banner oh dispossed squires with good hearts, who are tired on tyranny. You need not choose a like as a square peg, come join with me! Now see what I mean, already he's showing promise ... damn that was FUNNY! Joe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slapdragon Posted January 30, 2001 Share Posted January 30, 2001 Originally posted by Joe Shaw: Now see what I mean, already he's showing promise ... damn that was FUNNY! Joe Never spell check -- it ruins the mood and drops you typing speed down from 95 words a minute. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted January 30, 2001 Share Posted January 30, 2001 Ah Joe, you fear me as they feared Merlin. Not at all, I've always felt that replacing the engine on the P-51 with a Merlin was an excellent move and one that I applaud. Joe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lorak Posted January 30, 2001 Share Posted January 30, 2001 True Shaw, The problem was in using the P-51 as a ground attack aircraft. The radiator in the belly made it way to suceptible to ground fire. Lorak the loathed. ------------------ "Do not wait to strike till the iron is hot; but make it hot by striking."--William Butler Yeats Cesspool Combatmissionclub Lorak's FTX and for Kitty's sake =^..^= Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slapdragon Posted January 30, 2001 Share Posted January 30, 2001 Originally posted by Joe Shaw: Not at all, I've always felt that replacing the engine on the P-51 with a Merlin was an excellent move and one that I applaud. Joe Just like a banker to kill the poetry for axle grease and avgas. When I am King, I will make sure you are well treated in a house for people who play with numbers all day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted January 30, 2001 Share Posted January 30, 2001 Agreed Lorak (gawd, don't you just hate all this agreement?) but remember that the primary value of the Mustang was as a long range escort. I've always liked long range escorts, I hate it when my date runs out of steam early in the evening. Mind you the belly tank is a bit disconcerting, especially when they drop it before the ... uh ... action starts. Joe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tanklover MD Posted January 30, 2001 Share Posted January 30, 2001 You would think that this "Slapdragon" character would get the hint that he was not wanted on this thread and leave it alone. Maybe you guys are being too subtle? How about this: "Slapdragon, you are not wanted on Peng's happy thread" "In fact all of us here in the kingdom wish you were dead" You can add more lines as they come to you and eventually he will take the hint. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted January 30, 2001 Share Posted January 30, 2001 You would think that this "Slapdragon" character would get the hint that he was not wanted on this thread and leave it alone. Not at all, as was so able stated in Blazing Saddles, "All are equal here..." We have high standards for such a low group, and we insist that these standards be maintained. If one wishes to become one with the 'pool (as who does not), one must follow the traditions and arcane rituals established by the founders of This The One The True The CessPool! We welcome all who come to us with the proper spirit ... and the cash of course. Joe BTW, my recent spate of postings is solely due to my responsibility to maintain the standards of the pool and is in no way a reflection of the fact that a couple dozen more posts will give me 1000. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lorak Posted January 30, 2001 Share Posted January 30, 2001 Ahh So true Joe, We accept pretty much everyone... Providing they understand what the are trying to join. We enjoy taunting first and foremost. But it has to be clever and well done. It also needs to be at least in good taste. Well, as good as you would expect when telling someone what a low life git thier parents raised. Obscure also works wonders, making crazy links to obscue poetry, literature, and or historical events is also a plus. You see we get our kicks above the waistline sunshine. Lorak the loathed ------------------ "Do not wait to strike till the iron is hot; but make it hot by striking."--William Butler Yeats Cesspool Combatmissionclub Lorak's FTX and for Kitty's sake =^..^= Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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