A Thousand Points of Peng, A Kindler, More Gentler Cess

[Mark IV]

Originally dreamt by Slapdragon:

Well, as a Knight of my own order, who invented Hamstertruppen...

CHOP!

Right, and Shaw invented literacy. Read the Annals of the Pool (sorry, two "n"s in annal, Macey); you were still limply arguing Brinnell hardnesses when the original Hamstertruppen were commissioned, by OGFS or someone of even less consequence.

Now you come in here with your calcium carbonates and your plasmatics and your depleted uranials and we're supposed to line up and drink the purple Kool-Aid, is that it? What next? Heideman and Username on septic techniques?

Ya'll are lucky I'm on the road again. Where the hell is Meeks? The 'pool is profaned with groglodyte grunting and you all act as if nothing has happened! Not surprising it followed mensch home... might as well all start posting new command suggestions and "lookie what happened to MY tank"s, with lots of s. Harumph.

[109 Gustav]

Hate to butt in, but what are the requirements for being Peng Thread material? Madmatt kind of steered me in this direction after locking up a really good thread for no apparent reason. Think I should join?

------------------

Well my skiff's a twenty dollar boat, And I hope to God she stays afloat.

But if somehow my skiff goes down, I'll freeze to death before I drown.

And pray my body will be found, Alaska salmon fishing, boys, Alaska salmon fishing.

-Commercial fishing in Kodiak, Alaska

[Mark IV]

Originally posted by 109 Gustav:

Hate to butt in, but what are the requirements for being Peng Thread material?

You don't join, you endure.

You can either take it, dish it out, and get accepted over time, or you're dogmeat.

Nice to see someone asking about the requirements up front, though. They are:

A wicked tongue, hopefully creative; witty pugnacity.

A very thick skin.

Tactical ability, or better yet, illusions about your tactical ability.

I wouldn't waste any effort on real self-esteem, as a general rule.

Consider this a freebie. This isn't a damn chat room, you know, so either insult someone or bugger off.

[Hamstersss]

Originally posted by Mark IV:

Yeegods! We are surrounded by grogs and worse!?!?. Where the hell is Meeks? <Weep> -Sob- We're doomed! DOOOOOMED!!! Oh unhappy day!!

And in the distance, a rooster calls, caring nothing for grogs or inane worthless posting. Signaling only that a new day has come and with it, the dawn...

What, praytell, does the number 95 and the number 5 have to do with Slappy? Well, the 95 would be my score and the 5 would be Slappy's. Yes, at the cost of only 17 casualties, I have annihilated Slapdragon. He took 115 (Or so) casualties with another 100 surrendering whole or in part. His MarkIVs, cannon-HTs, mortar(!)-HTs, SMG squads, shrecks, all destroyed in close combat in the snow. Poor Slapdragon, too much book-learning methinks. Poor lad spends all his time reading, so little time doing. Did I mention I did all of this with a pair of M24s, an M8, an M18 (That only fired HE, so poor was Slappy's tactical knowhow) and a ragtag bunch of regular infantry?

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Car Wars sucked hard. In fact all Steve Jackson games sucked hard. What the hell was wrong with you, back then? Didn't you ever hear about the d20?!?!

No d20 back then fool. Cars Wars was only 4 dollars, what do you expect?

[Slapdragon]

Originally posted by Mark IV:

CHOP!

Right, and Shaw invented literacy. Read the Annals of the Pool (sorry, two "n"s in annal, Macey); you were still limply arguing Brinnell hardnesses when the original Hamstertruppen were commissioned, by OGFS or someone of even less consequence.

Now you come in here with your calcium carbonates and your plasmatics and your depleted uranials and we're supposed to line up and drink the purple Kool-Aid, is that it? What next? Heideman and Username on septic techniques?

Ya'll are lucky I'm on the road again. Where the hell is Meeks? The 'pool is profaned with groglodyte grunting and you all act as if nothing has happened! Not surprising it followed mensch home... might as well all start posting new command suggestions and "lookie what happened to MY tank"s, with lots of s. Harumph.

Yes, please blather on nave. Revisionist historians such as yourself can rewrite history all you want. But when a multipurpose animal such as myself shows up the only way to combat that feeling of being a buttboy in a dog circus is to slather the meaningless insults. Being nobility now I will just refer it to a secretary for a polite form letter and a signed autographed picture of me with Princess what's-her-name that left her hubby and thinsk she is a rock star.

[Slapdragon]

Originally posted by Elijah Meeks:

And in the distance, a rooster calls, caring nothing for grogs or inane worthless posting. Signaling only that a new day has come and with it, the dawn...

What, praytell, does the number 95 and the number 5 have to do with Slappy? Well, the 95 would be my score and the 5 would be Slappy's. Yes, at the cost of only 17 casualties, I have annihilated Slapdragon. He took 115 (Or so) casualties with another 100 surrendering whole or in part. His MarkIVs, cannon-HTs, mortar(!)-HTs, SMG squads, shrecks, all destroyed in close combat in the snow. Poor Slapdragon, too much book-learning methinks. Poor lad spends all his time reading, so little time doing. Did I mention I did all of this with a pair of M24s, an M8, an M18 (That only fired HE, so poor was Slappy's tactical knowhow) and a ragtag bunch of regular infantry?

Meeks did defeat me. I am lower than low tactically, although at least I only live in South Carolina, and was not born here.

[Joe Shaw]

Right, and Shaw invented literacy.

And I did too, you know. Why, before me there was darkness upon the land (which may have contributed to the difficulty in reading) and literacy was unknown. The era has come to be known as Before Shaw ... or simply, B.S. And then the light that was SHAW burst upon the world, much as a ripe pimple, it's time come at last, spews forth it's contents upon the bathroom mirror of the universe. And the populace found solace in the written word and celebrated it's newfound literacy by writing letters and ending those letters with the acknowledgment of he who brought it all to pass in the era known simply as Post Shaw ... or P.S. ... and that's the truth.

Joe

[109 Gustav]

Originally posted by Mark IV:

You don't join, you endure.

You can either take it, dish it out, and get accepted over time, or you're dogmeat.

Nice to see someone asking about the requirements up front, though. They are:

A wicked tongue, hopefully creative; witty pugnacity.

A very thick skin.

Tactical ability, or better yet, illusions about your tactical ability.

I wouldn't waste any effort on real self-esteem, as a general rule.

Consider this a freebie. This isn't a damn chat room, you know, so either insult someone or bugger off.

Thanks for the advice, you sheepshagger (see, I'm getting into the spirit of the Peng thread), but I think I'll clear out. Guess I'm just not cut out for this place

------------------

Well my skiff's a twenty dollar boat, And I hope to God she stays afloat.

But if somehow my skiff goes down, I'll freeze to death before I drown.

And pray my body will be found, Alaska salmon fishing, boys, Alaska salmon fishing.

-Commercial fishing in Kodiak, Alaska

[Seanachai]

Originally posted by Roborat:

...anyway, I have noticed that Slapdragon has started showing up lately, (likely as refuge from his royal 3rd person Rexford), and some of his posts weren't grogly at all. I think he should be rewarded by being awarded kniggithood also, I think he deserves it as much as some of the other recent inductees (draftees??), and it would serve him right for showing up in here.

Bugger that, I like Slagdragon as well as the next intelligent wank who shows up here, but he's not getting Knighthood that easy. I'd say give him Squire status, with a right good will, and certainly apply the new rules to him, as I believe the lad has staying power, but although Lorak's rationalized the Knighthood/Squire requirements, we can't just be inducting every lunatic Tom, Dick, and Mary who wanders in here. This cheapens the accomplishments of those who achieved their present status by being here first, and setting up a whole lot of pointless and humiliating rules for joining an august brother/sisterhood that most folk would recoil from in horror, and exclaim that they wished they'd thrown their own children to pitbulls before allowing them to turn out this way. Come to think of it, I wish I'd thrown Slapdragon to the Pitbulls with my own hands, while tossing flower-petals into the sawdust pit where he was being dismembered, O and the sea the sea crimson sometimes like fire and the glorious sunsets and the figtrees in the Alameda gardens yes and all the queer little streets and pink and blue and yellow houses and the rosegardens and the jessamine and geraniums and cactuses and Gibraltar as a girl where I was a Flower of the mountain yes when I put the rose in my hair like the Andalusian girls used or shall I wear a red yes and how he kissed me under the Moorish wall and I thought well as well him as another and then I asked him with my eyes to ask again yes and then he asked me would I yes to say yes my mountain flower and first I put my arms around him yes and drew him down to me so he could feel my breasts all perfume yes and his heart was going like mad and yes I said yes I will Yes.

Bugger! Damn fine stuff, Von Shrad, and thanks to Mr. Happy for sharing his usual dose! That's green windowpane, that is lad, and no mistake.

Roight, then! Let Slapdragon in as a Knight! I'm off to play Cripple-Mr.-Onion with Nanny Og, and sing the Hedgehog song on the lawn in our current ice storm!

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Tremble, tyrants and you perfidious opprobrium of all the parties,

Tremblez! your parricidal projects finally will receive their prices!

But these sanguinary despots, But these accomplices of Berli,

All these tigers which, without pity, Bauhaus the centre of their mother!

We will enter the career When our elder is not there any more,

We will find there their dust And the trace of their virtues

[Roborat]

I see I sparked some action in this somewhat boring board tonight. I think I have been proved correct, slappy does have the wit and humor to be a pooler. And you all seemed to have missed my devious scheme. As a major grog, in fact, the very ubergrog of grogginess, us awarding him knniggitt hood in the pool would have instantly destroyed his credibility with the grognerds. Thus simultaneously punishing him for the sheer effrontry of posting here, and trapping him here for eternity, as he would no longer be able to show his face, or any other part, in the main board again.

And Lord Llorak, check your math. I am at post 107, most of them have been in here, methinks you have missed some posts??? Besides I am Canadian, a nation famous for being quiet and unobtrusive. We don't waste our time on meaningless babble, merely to inflate our post count, we post when we have something of value to say. So conversely, when a Canadian does finally deign to post, it is inherently of extreme value. So by simple logic, by comparing volume, one of my posts is equivalent to 5 of Menschies, 10 of Stukas, 1064 of Hirams, 64032.556 of Joe shallows, and about an infinity squared of gunnybunny or rob/whatever. So feel honoured and special that I, a proud Northern Albertan (the ultimate degree of Canadian-ness), condescend to illuminate your trivial little lives with my benevelent attention.

So endeth the sermon. A limited number of signed transcripts are available for a reasonable fee from CBC North, don't forget to add the GST.

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"With cat-like tread, Upon our prey we steal;

In silence dread, Our cautious way we feel." -G&S

[Seanachai]

Originally posted by nijis:

In less happy news, MacStompie the alphabet guy, who seems to accumulate surnames faster than a third-rate Circassian Mamluke...

Ah, now while he spelled it wrong (Mameluke, you sods, not his take on The-Poor-Man's-MacAuslan), that's just fine, that is. Some of the good stuff.

------------------

Tremble, tyrants and you perfidious opprobrium of all the parties,

Tremblez! your parricidal projects finally will receive their prices!

But these sanguinary despots, But these accomplices of Berli,

All these tigers which, without pity, Bauhaus the centre of their mother!

We will enter the career When our elder is not there any more,

We will find there their dust And the trace of their virtues

[Moriarty]

Sir Stuka, has a nice ring to it.

Well done, outstanding in fact. Marriage and Knighthood within the space of a week. You leave me Squireless but that's the natural course of events.

Your charge, as always, go forth and slay. You done good.

------------------

"Moriarty, you suck." -- Dunno, but somebody must've said it somewhere along the line

[Seanachai]

Originally posted by Slapdragon:

Being nobility now I will just refer it to a secretary for a polite form letter and a signed autographed picture of me with Princess what's-her-name that left her hubby and thinsk she is a rock star.

Good God, he thinks he's dating Kitty? Mace is going to cough up a kidney over this one.

And even on truly good hallucinogens, boyo, no one gets to unilaterally declare Lordship status here. Leadership comes in the same way it came to the Vikings...a sort of gradual feeling that it would be better to let so-and-so choose/lead/have-his-way because then things went better and no one had their goddamn head cut off prematurely. I only tell you this because of the complete lack of worth I feel you have, but acknowledge the potential for being less than a useless wank that I feel you show. Selah.

------------------

Tremble, tyrants and you perfidious opprobrium of all the parties,

Tremblez! your parricidal projects finally will receive their prices!

But these sanguinary despots, But these accomplices of Berli,

All these tigers which, without pity, Bauhaus the centre of their mother!

We will enter the career When our elder is not there any more,

We will find there their dust And the trace of their virtues

[Slapdragon]

Originally posted by Seanachai:

Good God, he thinks he's dating Kitty? Mace is going to cough up a kidney over this one.

And even on truly good hallucinogens, boyo, no one gets to unilaterally declare Lordship status here. Leadership comes in the same way it came to the Vikings...a sort of gradual feeling that it would be better to let so-and-so choose/lead/have-his-way because then things went better and no one had their goddamn head cut off prematurely. I only tell you this because of the complete lack of worth I feel you have, but acknowledge the potential for being less than a useless wank that I feel you show. Selah.

Ahhh, but you discount palace revolution by the monkeys in the out, as seen on the Discovery Channel. And I sense not all is well in the Cesspool. Note the broad range of opinion -- make him a knight, make him a squire, ignore him, kill him. Seems like more than one team is needed to fit more than one way of thinking.

I am thinking now, squire status? Or perhaps it is time for the church to leave Rome and be off to a new Chateau in Avignon. Perhaps a competing order is in the works, and those at the bottom who deserve better will rise forth as warriors for a new Krewe. A Krewe of warriors from the Highlands, who plan to tame the wilds and plant their seeds as they defeat ignorant dragons, drink overpriced wine with the Pope's name plainly emblazoned, and sell indulgences to the common folk along with images of the saints and parts of their long dead anatomy too.

Perhaps, if Knighthood is not to be, lordship is but a lame rendering of a dead time. Perhaps I should name a Krewe, Ye Old Krewe of the Cannon and Garter, and invite those not satisfied with Knighthoods and Squirehoods to be Lieutenants, Captains, and highest of the high, Possemen in a group that owes no debts but to the brotherhood and sisterhood of the Krewe.

Maybe this social construction will arise forth with the hard core revolutionaries, those not satisfied with allowing others to choose their path. Afterall Jose Gasparilla was no tyrant, cept when he raped and murdered a town, he was a gentle guy who was loved, and loved by his Krewe. And when Tampa said no to his simple request for recognition due him, he merely sailed up and took over a section for himself and his loyal following. He read poetry to the crowds also, when he was not shooting some of them.

So -- who wants to join the competing band, Ye Old Krewe of the Cannon and Garter, and oppose the tyranny and elitism of the Kingdom of Cess? Rise up squires and Captains ye shall be.

[Hamstersss]

Originally posted by Slapdragon:

So -- who wants to join the competing band, Ye Old Krewe of the Cannon and Garter, and oppose the tyranny and elitism of the Kingdom of Cess? Rise up squires and Captains ye shall be.

Being a hoodlum and more than a little displeased with that damn Lorak, I'll join on two conditions:

1. I get titles, lots of titles. And they have to sound menacing. This goes hand in hand with the requirement that others don't get no steenking titles without some damn work.

2. You start a website, so that we may keep a tally of our beating of the stupid, moderate, all-inclusive, purple dinosaur, "I love you, you love me, let's be friends", asstacular, anti-French, no place for anything or anyone interesting bunch a' horse puckey Kanniggets that occupy this political correct mockery of a Cesspool.

Do these two things and I will be part of your Krewe, which is inherently cool as it has a 'K' instead of a 'c' and I will also bring along Roborat, Hiram and Croda, who adore me and worship me as a god on earth and the personified avatar of CM.

------------------

Car Wars sucked hard. In fact all Steve Jackson games sucked hard. What the hell was wrong with you, back then? Didn't you ever hear about the d20?!?!

No d20 back then fool. Cars Wars was only 4 dollars, what do you expect?

[jd]

Slappy.....the banner of schism has already been raised. Meekley odeo and his running dog Hiram (his meds have since be adjusted) were it. All of it. Dabble in the pool of the gods if you must, but I'd expect a historian to at least have passing cognizance of the cultural mores and myths of the culture in which he immerses himself. Since you probably look like Margaret Meade, I suppose Mace would be your best test subject.

So heresy ye Anabaptist holds no sway here. After all, while you can spew forth words and verbiage to make the Dean proud of your unintelligible scholasticism (shoot, academics are more prolix than attorneys) where you going to find the bodies to sustain the movement. Perhaps DumbBunny and you can exchange some good natured taunts based on the early Greek tales, or better yet a clever repartee with Lewis on the attributes of Cataline.

Now go sit at the end of the table of your betters and observe, occasionally we shall throw some slop your way. Geez we always get these deluded Messianic types wandering through here.

================

My congratulations to Croda and Peter, my erstwhile, once and future squires, on their elevation to the peerage. In Croda's case it's the only way it was going to happen. In tonight's thrilling installment of his impression of Shaka Zulu, Croda has sent his hordes forth to be impaled upon my stalwart troops defenses. He has originated an intriguing bit of armored tactics. I was so impressed I am bestowing the title "The Crodamite Maneuver It consists of backing up your Crack Sherman, revving the engine, pop[ping the clutch and like a bat out of hell attempt to vault over the known minefield, to be able to get off a shot at the Panther that has you bore-sighted. Unfortunately, it does not appear his armored behemoth actually cleared the ground, but it coasted suitably beyond the smoke screen to ingest a 75mm AP from said panther. Well done my boy. initiative, l'audace and courage. Not brains mind you, but certainly the others.

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If frogs had uzi's, snakes woudn't mess with them so much. - Hiram

[chrisl]

Hey Politician, I mean Lawyer, I really only have two things to say:

1) Wow-- I'm amazed that you were willing to post your own picture after your previous analysis. You're even more frightening than Morse, and don't look so much like a lawyer as a (previously mentioned) politician, or even worse, a lobbyist. I can't believe I agreed to a game with you. The horror.

2) Send me a damn file.

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"If you can taste the difference between caviar on a cracker and ketchup on a Kit-Kat while blindfolded, you have not had enough aquavit to be ready for lutefisk." (stolen from some web page about lutefisk)

[Seanachai]

Originally posted by Slapdragon:

Ahhh, but you discount palace revolution by the monkeys in the out, as seen on the Discovery Channel.

Maybe this social construction will arise forth with the hard core revolutionaries, those not satisfied with allowing others to choose their path.

So -- who wants to join the competing band, Ye Old Krewe of the Cannon and Garter, and oppose the tyranny and elitism of the Kingdom of Cess? Rise up squires and Captains ye shall be.

Humph, an idjit, but an entertaining idjit, withall. Lad, as I've been after telling you, there is no leadership here. The best that anyone can claim is 'first amongst equals' or, in the actual useage of the Peng Challenge Thread, 'half-daft amongst complete idjits'. We've had this sort of thing before, this hunger after power, place, and presence, and it's just not on. Leading a Palace Revolution in the Peng Challenge Thread is like trying to empty a very low bar. Sure, you can push them all out, take their stools, and declaim bright speeches about a new order and the rights of the common drinking man. But the next day, the regulars are all back at their usual stools, and you can show up and tell them that you're in charge. But after a while, after you've argued enough, and had enough rounds bought for you, and run into the locals' pig-headedness, and bought a few drinks for everyone yourself, you'll realize that there's no one in charge, but you'd just as soon not contradict Berli over there about Opera, or Peng about what makes an individual a useless Wank, or Hiram about how nice cats are, or...I think you get my drift. Eventually, you just find a stool that suits you, and pull it up to the rail, and begin jawing everyone about how it wasn't like this when you first joined the Thread, and how just any useless wipe can come in and talk about how the Thread ought to be run, and how in your day there were Real Posters, not like the worthless load of rubbish you see here now, and how can we keep these aimless ****e's from just wandering in and posting their 2 post pieces of used toilet tissue, and how you've sneezed better verbiage into an old, used undershirt that you found one night under the bed. And after awhile, lad, you realize you are one of the leaders of the Peng Challenge Thread, and it didn't take any gun battles, or purges, or executions, and, in the long run, you're just as happy, 'cause if you'd made an uproar like that, who'd be buying you a pint now, when everyone else is completely buggered about hearing your latest theory of how the posters of the world should unite, because they have nothing to lose but the chains of a useless and aging feudal system that never took into account the penetration abilities of a truly sharp mind when encountering a massive, immovable object such as the Peng Challenge Thread. And you'll be home, ya' see.

------------------

Tremble, tyrants and you perfidious opprobrium of all the parties,

Tremblez! your parricidal projects finally will receive their prices!

But these sanguinary despots, But these accomplices of Berli,

All these tigers which, without pity, Bauhaus the centre of their mother!

We will enter the career When our elder is not there any more,

We will find there their dust And the trace of their virtues

[Slapdragon]

Originally posted by Seanachai:

yada yada uada crap crap crap

Ah, my dear seneshal, you forget why revolts take place -- because they are fun! Robspierre said "revolution is an occupation not a destination." The Counsellor of Canudos said, "When the Can barks at your door you bar it and prepare to fight." Of course they were both certified, but never let a good quote go to waste.

Besides, when you are locked in a cell with Crips, maybe it is time to find some Bloods to be allies, or you will never truly be able to shower in peace.

[Hamstersss]

Everyone can point to my failed heresy and say that Slappy can't succeed but you ignore one cogent fact, Slappy hasn't started another thread. Rather, he's chosen to start a new tradition within the Pool, so it cannot be ignored or locked up.

I also think he'll have a better chance of success, being the formost authority on the subject of heresy, as he not only chose a cool name (Mistake number one for me) but he also takes advantage of a serious lull in the quality of the Pool and its participants. You see, some of us think this inclusive, nicy-nice Pool sucks rocks. We may not necessarily want to curse but that doesn't mean we want everyone to be in the gang. The choice is obvious:

1. Lorak and Seanachai's happy fun Pool of happy funness.

2. Anything else.

For god's sake, that pansy Lorak has managed to rape the Pool rotten, all the while smiling like he's the kind of guy who wouldn't squash an ant. At the same time, ol' pompous ass Seanachai's waxing poetic on the foolishness of sweet revolution, as if you could argue with a force of nature. What a bunch of sissies you bastards have turned into. As far as I'm concerned, the following sonsofbitches should ditch the old system immediately, based on necessary bile, evil and disregard for humanity:

Pawbroon (What the hell does that name mean anyway, you stupid Frog?! You'll have to leave YK2 with the sissies but maybe we can get a good Montague and Capulet suicide murder thing going on)

Berli

Geier

Stuka and MacOGSOBF

Peng('Natch)

MarkIV

The rest of you bastards are the Diet Coke of the Pool and should fall into the La Brea tar pits.

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Car Wars sucked hard. In fact all Steve Jackson games sucked hard. What the hell was wrong with you, back then? Didn't you ever hear about the d20?!?!

No d20 back then fool. Cars Wars was only 4 dollars, what do you expect?

[mensch]

Originally posted by Slapdragon:

mensch you bastard -- here is your serious grog answer:

edited for the purpose of not boring the poolers again.

wow slapdragon answered my question..I feel.... enlightened? hmm it could be cus of the dried frog pills you guys give me though.

---------

www.derkessel.com Home of „Die Sturmgruppe“; Scenario Design Group for Combat Mission.

[mensch]

Originally posted by Slapdragon:

mensch you bastard -- here is your serious grog answer:

edited for the purpose of not boring the poolers again.

wow slapdragon answered my question..I feel.... enlightened? hmm it could be cus of the dried frog pills you guys give me though.

---------

www.derkessel.com Home of „Die Sturmgruppe“; Scenario Design Group for Combat Mission.

[Mace]

Originally posted by Seanachai:

Good God, he thinks he's dating Kitty? Mace is going to cough up a kidney over this one.

Hooooiickkkkkk..kkk.kk.k!!!!

Hmmmmm. That explains this lump I've had in my throat all day!

Mace

[mensch]

Originally posted by Seanachai:

Good God, Mensch, did you ask a question like that here?

yes it fecking bloody was! you snot eating Gnu! slapdragon had the balls to follow me here to my home!!! and open his yappy grog mouth ... only to acually answer my question.. I .. I feel cheeted.. because I had then turned from serious modus to Pool modus after 8 hours of un answered time.. bloody fecking grogs we should all strap them to Scuds and fire them to see how long it takes for them to scream before impact.

• • • – – – • • •

www.derkessel.com Home of „Die Sturmgruppe“; Scenario Design Group for Combat Mission.

[This message has been edited by mensch (edited 01-30-2001).]

[mensch]

Originally posted by Kitty:

Sorry, mouse. Your "original" idea has already been done. See Warphead's "Chicks With Tanks" and my Female 3D CM Face Replacement mod. Screenshots available elsewhere on this board. =P

Kitty

true.. but he said NAKED CHICKS... and nothing gets a gaming geek hoter then a sweet babe wearing nothing but a belt of ammo and holding a AK-47! ooh baby... *drool*