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The Twelve Step Program to the PENG Challenge!


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Lorak? Lorak! LORAK!<big>LORAK!!!!</big> Ahem, please scribe thusly into your musty tome of deeds.

The Panzer Leader: Has proven himself on the field of battle, by slaughtering into a great mound the human excrement that a certain SSN who goes by the distasteful name of Colon Cancer threw at me. A victory.

Col. Sander: A sad, wasteful loss of human life by a sad lossful waste of human life. A loss.

It was a a valley, a valley of trouble, a valley of trouble revisited in all its hellishness by one who goes by the name Rune. Though the going got tough, with my two panthers almost immediately KO'd, I fought back valiantly with my broken crews and HQ teams, and remained King of the Hill.

He never even took out my pillbox! You know the one -- we have all taken it out a thousand times, well our little chicken lover never managed to get it, tee-hee!

Thank you all, shut up, newbie gits, and good night.

[ 07-05-2001: Message edited by: Panzer Leader ]

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Mace:

I've got news for you, me little Northen neighbour....your JU-87 is a twin seater, always has been!

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Mace, heres some fun for you...

Clear a space on your desk. Yes thats it, move the sheep porn mags into your top draw along with the vaseline and tissue box....

Now move your chair back a little....

Grasp firmly {Down Bauhaus!}, the desk.....

Now bash your stooopid skull down REALLY hard a dozen times! Better still, count it out on your fingers as you go. Better make it 9 times then.

You think I don't know that a Stuka is a twin seater? Where the feck do you think Denise Richards has been sitting since I recruited her? Out on the wing?

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You know, some days just suck. Instead of trying to be creative, I'll just ask Lorak to please chalk up a win for me and a loss for speedbump. Things happened during the game but I'll let my able opponent tell it.

-dale

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Ah Panzer Leader, and you were doing fairly well too, but then: <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>The Panzer Leader: Has proven himself on the field of battle,<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Okay, so far so good, not Hemingway, mind you but okay. Unfortunately you continue with: <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>by slaughtering into a great mound the human excrement that a certain SSN who goes by the distasteful name of Colon Cancer threw at me.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Huh? In the first place your ... description makes NO sense at all. In the second place ... if you're going to use cutsie aliases (a practice I decry EXCEPT for SSNs, as this one was) kindly make them clear enough so that even Lorak MIGHT have clue as to who they are. Now perhaps I'm just a bit weary tonight, but I don't know who the hell you might be talking about. <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR> ... Col. Sander: A sad, wasteful loss of human life by a sad lossful waste of human life. A loss.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Col. Sander huh? Okay, I give up, can I buy a vowel?

Joe

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Jus' a quick oodate...Ah feckin' hate ye all....

Carry on...

SirMacOberGruppenBloodyStompinSicFeuhrerBastardABCDJimmy

PS Feckin' gamey Stuarts an' haggis weak Panthers. Did Ah mention Ah hate ye all....

PPS Bastaarrrds

PPS Tha' aincludes yoo, Mace, ye bowell ainfection.

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Panzer Leader beat the SSN known as Colonel Sander.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> There IS an SSN called Colonel Sander? Not exactly a proflific poster is he? We can't be expected to remember every Tom, Dick and Colonel Sander who wanders in and is given a game through pity.

Lorak do we count as CessPool games those games played against SSNs? Surely they must be at least a Serf before they're counted. Damnit maybe Seanachai is right (if, of course, it WAS Seanachai), this place is going to the dogs if we allow games against SSNs to be entered onto the scroll of honor. Now perhaps Seanachai put Panzer Leader onto this fool's throat, but the game still should not count UNLESS the SSN was a Serf. Do standards mean nothing?

Joe

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I believe the chap I played is listed on Lorak's site as a "pissboy" or somefink. I care not whether it is recorded - my hatred for you all will burn as bright regardless.

At least count the game for HIM, though, as it was he who challenged and lost to an esteemed member.

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Panzer Leader:

Tripe snipped - though, seeing as how I loathe ALL of you, I don't know why I bothered

At least count the game for HIM, though, as it was he who challenged and lost to an esteemed member.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Really? Who else did he play, Mouse? What esteemed member (in the Cesspool?!?) are you talking about?

[ 07-05-2001: Message edited by: MrSpkr ]

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Denise Richards in the. Same sentence as Angelina Jolie? My god, what is the world coming to? Have you no class? I've actually given an antialiased pixel about Lara Croft since I heard who was playing her in the film. Richards remains fake and inconsequential.

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>I believe the chap I played is listed on Lorak's site as a "pissboy" or somefink. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> On those rare occassions when I am mistaken I admit it. Panzer Leader is quite correct, Col. Sanders IS listed as a Serf and therefore the game is eligible for the scroll. HOWEVER ... part of the requirements for a CessPool member (be he/she a Serf, Squire or Knight) is a degree of constancy. We can't have these Serfs wandering in, wasting Lorak's valuable time (okay, okay, work with me on this) and then never posting again! In the case of Col. Sanders I think it's obvious that no Knight will take him to Squire since ... HELLO ... HE'S NOT HERE! Perhaps we need to cull the list a bit.

Joe

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Stuka:

Now bash your stooopid skull down REALLY hard a dozen times! Better still, count it out on your fingers as you go. Better make it 9 times then.

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Bang! Thump! Wallop! Crack! Crunch! Thwack! Bang! Thump! ..... Tonk!

Did that, now what?

Btw, did I receive a thank from Sir WXYZ for the lesson I gave him in why driving two buttoned-down tanks over the crest of a hill without first checking what's on the other side is a bad idea?

No!!! How Rude and inconsiderate!

Mace

[ 07-06-2001: Message edited by: Mace ]

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Kitty:

I wear the mask.jpg

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Oh lucky me....I now have a matching set of two!

Perhaps I can celebrate by finding another train I can throw myself under!

btw, do I know you? I'm Mace *extends hand* ...and you are?

[ 07-05-2001: Message edited by: Mace ]

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Joe, you are quite correct, and I have in fact lodged a complaint in the cesspool complaint box (that would be your anus) about the fact that myself, as the only participating squire (there are a few others but I think they are only Seanachai under a nom de guerre - anyway, that I am the squire that ends up playing all these yahoos and johnny-come-latelys.

For example, I am now playing Martyr and Parabellum, and just finished the game with Sanders, none of whom stuck around. WHat a collosal waste when I could've been pummeling YOU. Maybe I should've taken up that game with the comunist proboscis.

Naw...

Oh, I have to gloat for a second. I just took out a churchill, a cromwell and a challenger, along with all the infantry riders of Mrspkr by an ambushing PzIV in about 15 seconds flat.

One shot one kill, three shots: game over!

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Offer's still open face-hardened follower.

And it ain't just you.

Some twerp called Barf and puss was here a few threads ago & is now feeling the jackbot of a randomly picked Volks Grenadier Bn running up his spine.

It's a bit hard chasing down the 3 shermans and a Hellcat he got, but all his greyhounds have had Panzerfaust enemas and his 1 rifle company seems to have been flushed away somewhere.

Other than that Belly Achin' is whinging and moaning that his troops won't do what he tells them to and he's threatening to surrender. I'm not sure why I'm supposed to fear this, but somehow I do. In the mean time I just remind him that his troops are actually doing EXACTLY what he tells them to do, and if he didn't see the platoon behind that buttoned sherman then he's got a bit of a gall blaming his pixellated men for missing them too!!

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Look, I've found several other books for you to read, Joseph's Todger:

This?

Whining, Kicking and Crying to Get Your Way

..or..

You're Different -- And That's Bad

No? How about:

The Magic World Inside the Abandoned Refrigerator

Read them, experience them!

Don't thank me, it was the least I could do for a fellow antipodean!

Mace

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Oh bloody hell, have you gotten home yet Stalin? I've had to wait over 24 hours for your next step deeper into smellist **** in the Netherlands. I can't wait to see what you've got in store for me next.

I've had to entertain myself with a 6 year old game to keep from thinking about. PTO2 if you can believe it. I think I'll send my Japanese fleet down to Aukland and raze it to the ground while I wait.

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Oh yeah, and then there's Mrs Robinson - how could I forget.....no..that's not right..... why can't I forget???

...the idjit's there waving his arms, jumping up & down despite being a day late...we can only hope that it's not a sign that it could be reproducing!

I hope you've sent me a turn since lunch - since otherwise your outpouring of stupidity should really be directed inwards at yourself.

As a mark of contempt for your feeble efforts I shall actually go to the gym to flex my manly physique for all the lovelies there before I dish you up for dinner.

Razing Auckland is the most useful thing anyone on this thread has suggested yet! Get's my vote.

[ 07-06-2001: Message edited by: Stalin's Organ ]

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