Amazing fact, I know nothing about WW-1

[jon_j_rambo]

Hello Gamestars,

I'm a trained educated man, but I know nothing about WW-1. Only things I know are following:

1) Some king dude is killed, kicking off the war.

2) Germany + some other little countries throw down.

3) French, Prussians, Russians or whatever get in on it.

4) The Red Baron, Blue Max (movie), and such start flying around.

5) John Boy Walton is All Quiet in the Western Front

6) Hitler is a corporal getting gassed. Goering is a pilot.

7) Bunch of trench warfare, Germans almost get to Paris.

8) The war continues with a bunch of ping-pong.

9) USA enters, wins a battle at some hill

10) Alvin York captures 120+ buntas with spikes on their head.

11) Treaty of Versilles.

Is the game any good?

-Legend

[Bossy57322]

Is the game any good?

The game is phenomenal.

Can't tell if you are feigning ignorance on the subject but if so, there is a whole world of fascinating to dive into. From the causes to the event to the aftereffects - The Great War is fascinating and infinitely more complex than you might imagine.

[jon_j_rambo]

The game is phenomenal.

Can't tell if you are feigning ignorance on the subject but if so, there is a whole world of fascinating to dive into. From the causes to the event to the aftereffects - The Great War is fascinating and infinitely more complex than you might imagine.

Learned about World War 2 thru movies: Stalag 17, Bridge Too Far, Longest Day, Pearl Harbor, Private Ryan, Band of Brothers, Battle of the Bulge, Sands of Iwo Jima, Fighting Seabees, Dirty Dozen, The Holocaust, Grey Zone, Big Red One, Force 10 From Navaronne, Midway, etc.

Learned about World War 1 thru movies: Blue Max, Sgt. York, All Quiet on the Western Front.

There's no balance.

In my public school the teachers were not allowed to teach about wars post-U.S. Civil War. The reason why,"it is too emotional and polarizing" to the school districts learning enviornment. Therefore, that era was skipping. We were taught about Martin Luther King (MLK) and the evils of the American Capitalistic System.

I've got some reading to do. I need background in order to get interested in this game. Are there any cool movies I can start with?

-Legend

[CSS]

Your are the quesisentail American, "Damn the Torpedoes full speed ahaed!"

Try reading SLA Mashalls History of the First World War and more importantly ,

Victory Must be Ours, by Moyer! It was an extremly intresting war!

[wlape3]

Also try "Galipoli" with a youngish mad max. "Zeppelin" is another.

[jon_j_rambo]

Thanks for the tips.

"Damn the torpedos"....that was either Farraguat or Porter on the naval invasion of Alabama. More than knowledgable about Vicksburg, Shiloh (Pittsburgh Landing), Bull Run, Gettysburg (been there several times), Forrest, Stuart, Sheridan, Longstreet, Johnston, etc.

Also know my Vietnam very well: Rambo I (sheriff), Rambo II (extraction), Rambo III (Russians), Rambo IV (Burma), Rambo V (cancelled, going to Mexico), Deerhunter (more bullets), Apcolyspe Now (Charlie), Full Metal Jacket (donut in your locker), Platoon, Good Morning Vietnam, Hamburger Hill.

I love the movie Sgt. York. My favorite part is when he gets saved, then wins the turkey, then of course taking down the Buntas machine gun nest. Loved Gary Cooper movies: Sgt. York, Pride of the Yankees, High Noon. Also love Bogart, Errol Flynn.

Hey, are there any Indian games? You know, Custer, Black Hills, Seminoles, Apache....maybe some Alamo?

-Legend

[Bill101]

The Lost Battalion is a great film about US troops in action in the Meuse-Argonne in 1918. I really liked this film as a lot of WWI films are really dire (e.g. The Trench).

Also check out the ANZAC series from the '80s starring Paul Hogan.

Both are currently available on youtube, and they should be enough to get you started!

I also only found out recently as I never watched it when it was on TV, but the Young Indiana Jones series saw him take part in lots of WWI action, including in German East Africa. But I'll have to let others comment on whether or not this is worth watching.

[Alaric]

best greetings, i see no one named the movie of the movies from world war I, i guess...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paths_of_Glory

that movie is the perfect example of where can reach the "human being" at war.

best regards,

Alarick.

[U8led]

Hello Gamestars,

I'm a trained educated man, but I know nothing about WW-1.

Is the game any good?

-Legend

I also know nothing about ww1, but I am really enjoying this game more than I expected to.

Some of the things I prefer about this WW1 vs WW2 game:

1: NO Paratroops to worry about

2: Both players can be on the offensive right from the start. Which = fun for both sides imo. WW2 seems to be more fun to be axis at start and allies at finish.

3: totaly fresh and interesting strategies to explore

4: Airpower does not rule the war

5: Mobil Warfare in the East and Trench Warfare in the West

The only thing I am really not a huge fan of is the lottery style research system.

Hope that helps.

[Dragon99]

There are many good films about different wars:

e.g.

Waterloo: Napoleonic Wars

Gettysburg: Civil War

The Western Front: 1 World War

unglauglich many of the 2 World War II and of course on Korea, Vietnam, etc

BUT, you learn not su much history from this. If you want to learn, @ John: good info about the war, the cause and the background then I recommend just Wikipedia.

Just 1st World War, in which almost every royal house with other relatives and was widely seen as the fundamental evil of the 20th Century is, on the one can read very well there. Movies are so often only excerpts (with more or less truth content) from a war. And then when you read as whole divisions within hours were destroyed by artillery, then that's already handled just as terrifying in this war in human lives by his own generals was. Or about Verdun, lost out in a battle more than 1,000,000 soldiers your life. It bounced in each country, the generals with your old outdated rigid Tactics to the new weapons systems. Above all, the artillery and the machine gun. Well, I have not even most of the textbooks, but through books and containing wiki.

Maybe you have some time over Easter this ....:-)

[xwormwood]

WW1 Movies:

• Sinking of the Lusitania (2007) (+)
  
• Mata Hari (1931) (+)
  
• Fall of Eagles (TV-Series, 1974) (+)
  
• Lawrence of Arabia (1962) (++)
  
• The Blue Max (1966) (+)
  
• Escadrille Lafayette (1958) (+)
  
• Flyboys (2006) (-)
  
• Aces High (1976) (+)
  
• The Dawn Patrol (1938) (+)
  
• Von Richthofen and Brown (1971) (+)
  
• Red Baron (2006) (-)
  
• Hells Angels (1930) (+)
  
• Wings: The Complete Series (TV Series, 1977)
  
• All quiet on the Western Front (1930) (++)
  
• All quiet on the Western Front (1979) (-)
  
• The Lost Battalion (2001)
  
• All the Kings Men (1999) (+)
  
• Path of Glory (1957) (++)
  
• The Monocled Mutineer (1986)
  
• Passchendaele (2007)
  
• La Grande Illusion (1937)
  
• Gallipolli (1981) (+)
  
• The Lighthorsemen (2007)
  
• A Farewell To Arms (1932)
  
• A Farewell To Arms (1957)
  
• The Lost Patrol (1934)
  
• Beneath Hill 60 (2010)
  
• King & Country (1964)
  
• Seargent Yorck (1941)
  
• 1918 (1985)

maybe too of interest, but after WW1:

• Doctor Zhivago (1965) (+)
  
• Life and Nothing But (1989)
  
• The Court-Martial of Billy Mitchell (1955) (+)

Documentaries:

• The Great War, Special Edition (BBC, 7 DVD Box set, 1964) (++)
  
• World War One in Colour (2003) (-)

I have all these in my DVD shelfes, but those entries without a + or - i still haven't watched yet.

[xwormwood]

The Lost Battalion is a great film about US troops in action in the Meuse-Argonne in 1918. I really liked this film as a lot of WWI films are really dire (e.g. The Trench).

Also check out the ANZAC series from the '80s starring Paul Hogan.

Both are currently available on youtube, and they should be enough to get you started!

I also only found out recently as I never watched it when it was on TV, but the Young Indiana Jones series saw him take part in lots of WWI action, including in German East Africa. But I'll have to let others comment on whether or not this is worth watching.

Thanks Bill, i for myself wasn't aware of this series, too.

[Bossy57322]

WW1 Movies:

[*]Passchendaele (2007)

Documentaries:

• The Great War, Special Edition (BBC, 7 DVD Box set, 1964) (++)
  
• World War One in Colour (2003) (-)

I have all these in my DVD shelfes, but those entries without a + or - i still haven't watched yet.

Just saw Passchendaele for the first time and it was very good!

Add to the documentaries: The First World War. Comes in a 4 DVD set.

Also, on one of the rare occasions The History Channel actual runs programming involving history, they have some excellent pieces on The Somme and The Versailles Treaty that I have seen recently.

In my public school the teachers were not allowed to teach about wars post-U.S. Civil War. The reason why,"it is too emotional and polarizing" to the school districts learning enviornment. Therefore, that era was skipping. We were taught about Martin Luther King (MLK) and the evils of the American Capitalistic System.

Comrade Stalin would have been proud.

Was this a school in the United States?

[Catacol Highlander]

Forget the movies - do some real history. If I were you John I would do some reading on any of the events below to give you a feel for the conflict:

- Schlieffen Plan and its failure.

- Abortive western front battles if 1915. Neuve Chappelle is quite a good one as it was Haig's first attempt to break the deadlock

- Gallipolli 1915: a tragic waste of men and a British planning disaster.

- Battles on Tannenburg and Masurian Lakes on the Eastern Front in 1914 followed by "The Great Retreat" of 1915. The destruction of the Russian Army in 1915 was the beginning of the end for Tsarism and it marks the beginning the Bolshevisation of the Russian Army that would lead to the Revolution of 1917 and all the Communist History that would so dominate the globe until 1991. In the UK Russian history has now become the most popular area of study at school level so there are lots of books around about it, but if you want a really top narrative on the collapse of Tsarism, the destruction of the Red Army and the move towards the Civil War in Russia then I would recommend Orlando Figes' "A People's Tragedy" - dont be put off by the size of the book. It is very readable.

- The Great Battles of 1916 - The Somme, Verdun and the Brusilov Offensive in the East. Plenty on Verdun and The Somme if you google them - Verdun put 75% of the French Army through the mill and destroyed its attacking spirit for the rest of the war leading to the muntiy of April 1917. The Somme blooded the British Army and 1st July 1916 was the worst day in all of British Military History, but it paved the way for the British invention of Combined Arms tactics that would defeat Germany in 1918. It is often mistakenly argued that Germany, and Guderian in particular, invented "Blitzkrieg." That is wrong - it was a British development that peaked in 1918 and was subsequently copied by the German Army in time for 1939.

- Battle of Paschendaele (sometimes called 3rd Ypres) in 1917 and how bad weather could wreck a campaign. In my mind this was the worst battle of the war in the west in terms of the conditions for ordinary soldiers and the tragic loss of life for so little ground gained. The Battle of Cambrai in Nov 1917 is also of some interest as it was the first ever use of massed tanks in an effective manner.

- The German switch of tactics for their last gasp "Ludendorff" Offensive starting in March 1918. This is an interesting offensive to study in terms of ways in which static defences could be overcome, but at the same time a salutory lesson in the need for constant fire support on the modern battlefield as German casualties were enormous.

- The victory won by the British Army as they smashed the Hindenburg Line in 1918 at St Quentin in August. This was the battle that won the war and forced the German High Command to inform the Kaiser that defeat was inevitable.

I admit that I have left out everything on the Italian Front and the Balkans plus the War at Sea but, for me, the battles in West and East decided the war and so that is where I would focus my research initially.

No History taught after 1865? Someone over there needs a good kicking. As a historian myself how on earth can American youngsters get a feel for the modern world if history stops in 1865? Bloody crazy that is.

Cheers

Al

[Jestre]

Comrade Stalin would have been proud.

Was this a school in the United States?

I have a son in high school and a daughter in college and can attest to the "liberal" propaganda they were subjected to in High School. Both had to compromise their values to get good grades in history and english classes. My daughter actually had a teacher write on her paper that "your opinions are wrong".... She scored over 1400 on her sat's but had to struggle to get low b's in history and govt classes due to her conservative viewpoint. Case in point after several low grades on papers she decided to compromise her views and write a paper from a completely liberal view, got an A+ on that paper, highest grade she ever got in that class.

[Catacol Highlander]

John - is you like film then try this "Battlefields" documentary:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVarOtDZ7aE&feature=related

It's made for a general audience and only covers 1918, but it is not bad. As each 10min clip finishes just click on the link at the bottom to continue it...

Cheers

Al

[Noltyboy]

Germany, Austria and Italy are standing together in the middle of a pub when Serbia bumps into Austria and spills Austria's pint. Austria demands Serbia buy it a complete new suit because there are splashes on its trouser leg. Germany expresses its support for Austria's point of view. Britain recommends that everyone calm down a bit.

Serbia points out that it can't afford a whole suit, but offers to pay for the cleaning of Austria's trousers. Russia and Serbia look at Austria. Austria asks Serbia who it's looking at. Russia suggests that Austria should leave its little brother alone.

Austria inquires as to whose army will assist Russia in compelling it to do so. Germany appeals to Britain that France has been looking at it, and that this is sufficiently out of order that Britain should not intervene. Britain replies that France can look at who it wants to, that Britain is looking at Germany too, and what is Germany going to do about it? Germany tells Russia to stop looking at Austria, or Germany will render Russia incapable of such action.

Britain and France ask Germany whether it's looking at Belgium. Turkey and Germany go off into a corner and whisper. When they come back, Turkey makes a show of not looking at anyone. Germany rolls up its sleeves, looks at France, and punches Belgium.

France and Britain punch Germany.

Austria punches Russia.

Germany punches Britain and France with one hand and Russia with the other.

Russia throws a punch at Germany, but misses and nearly falls over. Japan calls over from the other side of the room that it's on Britain's side, but stays there.

Italy surprises everyone by punching Austria.

Australia punches Turkey, and gets punched back. There are no hard feelings because Britain made Australia do it.

France gets thrown through a plate glass window, but gets back up and carries on fighting.

Russia gets thrown through another one, gets knocked out, suffers brain damage, and wakes up with a complete personality change.

Italy throws a punch at Austria and misses, but Austria falls over anyway. Italy raises both fists in the air and runs round the room chanting.

America waits till Germany is about to fall over from sustained punching from Britain and France, then walks over and smashes it with a barstool, then pretends it won the fight all by itself.

By now all the chairs are broken and the big mirror over the bar is shattered. Britain, France and America agree that Germany threw the first punch, so the whole thing is Germany's fault . While Germany is still unconscious, they go through its pockets, steal its wallet, and buy drinks for all their friends.

[jon_j_rambo]

I have a son in high school and a daughter in college and can attest to the "liberal" propaganda they were subjected to in High School. Both had to compromise their values to get good grades in history and english classes. My daughter actually had a teacher write on her paper that "your opinions are wrong".... She scored over 1400 on her sat's but had to struggle to get low b's in history and govt classes due to her conservative viewpoint. Case in point after several low grades on papers she decided to compromise her views and write a paper from a completely liberal view, got an A+ on that paper, highest grade she ever got in that class.

Strange grades in school.

The GOOD: I always got "A/B" in Math, Physics, Stats.

The BAD: Any class that was subjective, I got "C". English, History, & Art; I had no chance. Even more laughable, I got "C" in Typing.....teacher would say,"Although your typing skills are excellent, your behavior is worth 20% of the class, thus you get C". Even crazier, in Physical Education I got "C", despite the fact I played on the Baseball, Golf, and Basketball teams. In Biology class, I got a "C" for leaving during Evolution Week. I did learn though, that calling an English teacher fat or a reprobate, doesn't help your grade.

UGLY: My college grades sucked. I barely graduated. Think I had 2.1 average. Didnt' care about grades, just wanted out in 4 years because of the cost and waste of time. Failed couple classes, got a couple "D"s too. Think I spent too much to in my fraternity recycling beer, chasing skirts, hanging with my soroity g/f, gambling, foosball, pool, ping-pong, poker, smoking cigars, golfing, baseball, basketball, gaming.

IHSV,

-Legend

[jon_j_rambo]

Germany, Austria and Italy are standing together in the middle of a pub when Serbia bumps into Austria and spills Austria's pint. Austria demands Serbia buy it a complete new suit because there are splashes on its trouser leg. Germany expresses its support for Austria's point of view. Britain recommends that everyone calm down a bit.

Serbia points out that it can't afford a whole suit, but offers to pay for the cleaning of Austria's trousers. Russia and Serbia look at Austria. Austria asks Serbia who it's looking at. Russia suggests that Austria should leave its little brother alone.

Austria inquires as to whose army will assist Russia in compelling it to do so. Germany appeals to Britain that France has been looking at it, and that this is sufficiently out of order that Britain should not intervene. Britain replies that France can look at who it wants to, that Britain is looking at Germany too, and what is Germany going to do about it? Germany tells Russia to stop looking at Austria, or Germany will render Russia incapable of such action.

Britain and France ask Germany whether it's looking at Belgium. Turkey and Germany go off into a corner and whisper. When they come back, Turkey makes a show of not looking at anyone. Germany rolls up its sleeves, looks at France, and punches Belgium.

France and Britain punch Germany.

Austria punches Russia.

Germany punches Britain and France with one hand and Russia with the other.

Russia throws a punch at Germany, but misses and nearly falls over. Japan calls over from the other side of the room that it's on Britain's side, but stays there.

Italy surprises everyone by punching Austria.

Australia punches Turkey, and gets punched back. There are no hard feelings because Britain made Australia do it.

France gets thrown through a plate glass window, but gets back up and carries on fighting.

Russia gets thrown through another one, gets knocked out, suffers brain damage, and wakes up with a complete personality change.

Italy throws a punch at Austria and misses, but Austria falls over anyway. Italy raises both fists in the air and runs round the room chanting.

America waits till Germany is about to fall over from sustained punching from Britain and France, then walks over and smashes it with a barstool, then pretends it won the fight all by itself.

By now all the chairs are broken and the big mirror over the bar is shattered. Britain, France and America agree that Germany threw the first punch, so the whole thing is Germany's fault . While Germany is still unconscious, they go through its pockets, steal its wallet, and buy drinks for all their friends.

Nice, son, I like the way you teach. I completely understand, need to print out your explanation, put in on a small piece of paper, stuff it in my pocket, then I know what the deal is. Think I need to get invovled in this mess.

Questions:

1) Any hot chicks in the bar?

2) What kind of drinks were there?

3) What was at stake, just who got to draw the next set of maps?

Regards, I like this dude.

IHSV,

-Legend

[Bossy57322]

Forget the movies - do some real history. If I were you John I would do some reading on any of the events below to give you a feel for the conflict:

- Schlieffen Plan and its failure.

- Abortive western front battles if 1915. Neuve Chappelle is quite a good one as it was Haig's first attempt to break the deadlock

- Gallipolli 1915: a tragic waste of men and a British planning disaster.

- Battles on Tannenburg and Masurian Lakes on the Eastern Front in 1914 followed by "The Great Retreat" of 1915. The destruction of the Russian Army in 1915 was the beginning of the end for Tsarism and it marks the beginning the Bolshevisation of the Russian Army that would lead to the Revolution of 1917 and all the Communist History that would so dominate the globe until 1991. In the UK Russian history has now become the most popular area of study at school level so there are lots of books around about it, but if you want a really top narrative on the collapse of Tsarism, the destruction of the Red Army and the move towards the Civil War in Russia then I would recommend Orlando Figes' "A People's Tragedy" - dont be put off by the size of the book. It is very readable.

- The Great Battles of 1916 - The Somme, Verdun and the Brusilov Offensive in the East. Plenty on Verdun and The Somme if you google them - Verdun put 75% of the French Army through the mill and destroyed its attacking spirit for the rest of the war leading to the muntiy of April 1917. The Somme blooded the British Army and 1st July 1916 was the worst day in all of British Military History, but it paved the way for the British invention of Combined Arms tactics that would defeat Germany in 1918. It is often mistakenly argued that Germany, and Guderian in particular, invented "Blitzkrieg." That is wrong - it was a British development that peaked in 1918 and was subsequently copied by the German Army in time for 1939.

- Battle of Paschendaele (sometimes called 3rd Ypres) in 1917 and how bad weather could wreck a campaign. In my mind this was the worst battle of the war in the west in terms of the conditions for ordinary soldiers and the tragic loss of life for so little ground gained. The Battle of Cambrai in Nov 1917 is also of some interest as it was the first ever use of massed tanks in an effective manner.

- The German switch of tactics for their last gasp "Ludendorff" Offensive starting in March 1918. This is an interesting offensive to study in terms of ways in which static defences could be overcome, but at the same time a salutory lesson in the need for constant fire support on the modern battlefield as German casualties were enormous.

- The victory won by the British Army as they smashed the Hindenburg Line in 1918 at St Quentin in August. This was the battle that won the war and forced the German High Command to inform the Kaiser that defeat was inevitable.

I admit that I have left out everything on the Italian Front and the Balkans plus the War at Sea but, for me, the battles in West and East decided the war and so that is where I would focus my research initially.

No History taught after 1865? Someone over there needs a good kicking. As a historian myself how on earth can American youngsters get a feel for the modern world if history stops in 1865? Bloody crazy that is.

Cheers

Al

I know some here don't like The Guns of August, but it is one of the most beautifully written books I have ever had the pleasure to read. I can think of no better place to start.

Just finished Three Armies on the Somme and The Marne 1914, both more recent scholarship and both excellent reads. Both highly recommended.

I have a son in high school and a daughter in college and can attest to the "liberal" propaganda they were subjected to in High School. Both had to compromise their values to get good grades in history and english classes. My daughter actually had a teacher write on her paper that "your opinions are wrong".... She scored over 1400 on her sat's but had to struggle to get low b's in history and govt classes due to her conservative viewpoint. Case in point after several low grades on papers she decided to compromise her views and write a paper from a completely liberal view, got an A+ on that paper, highest grade she ever got in that class.

I suppose I should be surprised and shocked, but it would have been more shocking still to hear that divergent viewpoints are accepted and discussed by our educational elite. The fact that your children are able to recognize they are being indoctrinated instead of educated does credit to them, and you.

[Sharkman]

If you think modern military history is ignored in the U.S. you should have a look at the German school system, WW1 and WW2 are almost completely ignored in the German education system. They try to touch on the holocaust a bit, probably because they think they have to, but that is it. Most young germans think Hitler was a just a mass murderer and that WW2 was all his fault and nobody else had anything to do with it. And believe it or not most young Germans have no knowlage of WW1 at all, and only know that there was a WW1 because WW2 seems to indicate that it was the second one. This is where it all happened and they're doing their best to forget or ignore it.

[xwormwood]

What kind of school did you visit in Germany? :eek:

( ) Die Clownschule (clown school)

( ) Die Baumschule (tree nursery)

( ) a place where all the lessons consisted of singing and hand clapping

Just kidding, just kidding. Doesn't even sound as mean as in German.

Sorry for that. ;)

But what you describe has nothing to do with my school experince in Germany. We had many good and thorough lessons about WW1 & WW2.

Seems to be state issues. :confused:

[Sharkman]

I did'nt go to school in Germany, my kids did and my son is still in school. None of my kids ever learned anything about WW1 or WW2 other than some minor details about the holocaust and that Hitler was a evil man. I have heard from older German freinds that they too learned Modern German history, but that over the last 20 or so years it has become a neglected subject for political reasons. My son has just started going to school for 8 hours a day, my other kids never had more than 4 or 5 hours a day, I was allways the opinion that 5 hours of school is not enough. My son's new school is trying to adopt an American style high school system, I hope it works out because so far I have been very dissapointed with my kids education over here.

[Snowstorm]

Noltyboy,

:D:D

That has got to be the best version of WWI I have ever had the pleasure of reading. I have to agree with Rambo, that IS a keeper. I need to save a copy of that one. :cool:

[Fred19]

Germany, Austria and Italy are standing together in the middle of a pub when Serbia bumps into Austria and spills Austria's pint. Austria demands Serbia buy it a complete new suit because there are splashes on its trouser leg. Germany expresses its support for Austria's point of view. Britain recommends that everyone calm down a bit.

Serbia points out that it can't afford a whole suit, but offers to pay for the cleaning of Austria's trousers. Russia and Serbia look at Austria. Austria asks Serbia who it's looking at. Russia suggests that Austria should leave its little brother alone.

Austria inquires as to whose army will assist Russia in compelling it to do so. Germany appeals to Britain that France has been looking at it, and that this is sufficiently out of order that Britain should not intervene. Britain replies that France can look at who it wants to, that Britain is looking at Germany too, and what is Germany going to do about it? Germany tells Russia to stop looking at Austria, or Germany will render Russia incapable of such action.

Britain and France ask Germany whether it's looking at Belgium. Turkey and Germany go off into a corner and whisper. When they come back, Turkey makes a show of not looking at anyone. Germany rolls up its sleeves, looks at France, and punches Belgium.

France and Britain punch Germany.

Austria punches Russia.

Germany punches Britain and France with one hand and Russia with the other.

Russia throws a punch at Germany, but misses and nearly falls over. Japan calls over from the other side of the room that it's on Britain's side, but stays there.

Italy surprises everyone by punching Austria.

Australia punches Turkey, and gets punched back. There are no hard feelings because Britain made Australia do it.

France gets thrown through a plate glass window, but gets back up and carries on fighting.

Russia gets thrown through another one, gets knocked out, suffers brain damage, and wakes up with a complete personality change.

Italy throws a punch at Austria and misses, but Austria falls over anyway. Italy raises both fists in the air and runs round the room chanting.

America waits till Germany is about to fall over from sustained punching from Britain and France, then walks over and smashes it with a barstool, then pretends it won the fight all by itself.

By now all the chairs are broken and the big mirror over the bar is shattered. Britain, France and America agree that Germany threw the first punch, so the whole thing is Germany's fault . While Germany is still unconscious, they go through its pockets, steal its wallet, and buy drinks for all their friends.

Indeed the most sophisticated dissertation about WWI I ever came across. Hats off! :cool: