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A witty Peng Challenge and other Oxymorons


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Oh very good, Drizzle00 has favored us with his location, aren't we just the fortunate ones. AND he has an email address ... of sorts ... yahoo.com eh ... how ... pedestrian of you.

Now that you've managed to follow THAT rule perhaps you could entertain the concept of following yet another? Or have we reached your particular level of incompetence? In any case you might consider actually ... I don't know ... CHALLENGING SOMEONE!

Sheesh, lads this one hasn't managed to learn a thing since he's been gone. I note with amazement that's he posted a grand total of 34 times since he graced the BTS board with his presence 9 months ago. He's a poseur, no doubt of that.

I blame the recent spat of substandard squires, it's given hope to every Tom, Dick and Drizzle out there that they TOO are CessPool material. THIS IS WHAT COMES OF LOWERING OUR STANDARDS ... which is a pretty remarkable thing to say about the CessPool if you think of it.

Joe

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The ÜberLizard goes out on a hot date with a crocodilette.
Note how I came in low out of the rising sun, deftly avaioding the mother’s radar and made off with the one with the soft supple scales before her first molt. Hold on, I think I’m becoming Mace
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Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

pedestrian

Where's my feckin' turn? I'm talkin' to you, jdmorse! You've had that move nearly a day, now, and I need to see my hapless Canucklehead defenders run around in circles and Die-A-Lot some more. Yeah, and you, Seanachai! Get the lead out or I'll swat your other M10, no matter how many mines you've bought, dastard. And you can shake a leg, too, stevetherat! All you have to do is press "DONE" and bounce the movie file. And as for you, Lars, I'll return that the hell-spawned abortion of a misbegotten scenario setup when the devil gives up smoking! You can pound sand, too, Croda, you mangy halfwit. Just because it's my setup doesn't mean it'll go any faster. And I don't care if you're subject to fines, penalties for early withdrawl, and three weeks in a brank, Joe Shaw, there's no goddam excuse to take more than two days to flip a movie file. Unless I'm making the excuses.

Now, go expire, the lot of you. Just send me my feckin' turn first. (Unless I owe you the turn, in which case you may simply expire.)

Agua Perdido

[Edited because it's 5:30 and I'm not drunk yet.]

[ March 21, 2002, 06:05 PM: Message edited by: Agua Perdido ]

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Oh now this goes too far, really it does. Hell, you Australians root for CRICKET ... cricket for Gawd's sake!
Har. Clearly this yank still doesn't get it boys. I hereby call on all the Australians to put the slipper into Jo Xia while he's on the carpet.
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Originally posted by Hiram Sedai:

got a good chuckle out of the latest.

once again...glad i'm not in this batch.

Why don't you just come straight out with it and ask Purrs-A-Phone to put you in another picture?
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<FONT COLOR = RED><LARGE>OHHHHH I like it. does it work with bold as well? :D

<FONT COLOR = BLUE> shame its so bloody fiddly though.

<FONT COLOR = GREEN> YEP, a little bit of coloUr is just what the MBT was lacking. PENG will love it. :eek:

<FONT COLOR = YELLOW> BTW DAME PATCH speaking of colour I love the latest batch of pics, I always thought there was something fishy about JOE ;)

<FONT COLOUR = RED>

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Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

I admit to a serious disappointment in MY new squire, however, at least AussieJeff {uugggghhhh, that just gives me the willies} is posting ... kind of ... after a fashion ...

Joe

I've come into the possession of another letter, forwarded by the Overseas Office for Abandoned and Stray Quires

It reads:

Dear Auntie Yeknod

Must thank you for educating me in the Cesspool traditions. Who needs a Kanigget when I can rely on you for the all the advice I desperately seek? I know you have Joe's full confidence, though I've started to doubt whether the latex rabbit suit is really necessary.

Still struggling with the vow of Trapist silence. I would have liked to have said something to Joe before departing for this rock but, as you said, we must avoid any unnecessary emotional displays. And, besides, I'm so lucky to stare at the Pacific Ocean all day. It really makes my life more interesting.

Me reply:

Dear Dicey

Good work!

Just a few more months before stage three. Remember, the rabbit suit MUST stay on. Joe will only accept you IF you can convince him that you are Mr Nibbles. Remember that you were doing so well with that burly law-enforcement official before he got unruly with his stun-gun. Just goes to show that saying, "Hi, I'm Mr Nibbles, do you want to see how high I can jump?" can bring out the worst in some people.

Now, yes, life might be a bit lonesome on that bit of rock so I'm sending you a song from me Rogered and Hummerstunned tune-book:

I got sunlight on the sand

I got moonlight on the sea

I got mangoes and bananas

You can pick right off a tree

I got volleyball and pingpong

And a lot of dandy games

What ain't I got?

I ain't got gnomes!

[Chorus]

There is nothing like a gnome

Nothing in the world

There is nothing you can name

That is anything like a gnome

I feel restless, I feel blue

I feel lonely and in brief

I feel every kind of feeling

But the feeling of relief

I feel hungry as the Wolf felt

When he met Red Riding Hood

What don't I feel?

I don't feel good!

[Chorus]

I dream of little people

With a short and hairy frame

I dream of rotund bellies

That would burst my heart aflame

I dream of hearing verse quote

That will wash my soul from chore

What will I hear?

It ain't Joe Shaw

[Chorus]

So suppose a gnome ain't bright

Or completely free from flaws

Or as faithful as a bird dog

But as kind as Santa Claus

It's a waste of time to worry

Over things that they have not

Be thankful for -

The things they got!

[Chorus]

Yeknod Mono-drone de Lurk

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Originally posted by Dweezil44:

sniffs air... possibly he farted

Dweezil44? Are you like the 43 Dweezils that came before you? Perhaps the inbreeding in the Dweezil clan has sent you into this breathing world with a brain scarce half made up? Please leave by the way you came in and don't return. And, as always, SOD OFF
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Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

Hell, you Australians root for CRICKET ... cricket for Gawd's sake!

Joe, given a choice of rooting and cricket or just cricket alone, which would you take? Let's face it, cricket is as exciting as watching paint dry, so a little rooting to liven things up ain't a bad idea...

...Oh, I forgot... at your age, rooting holds no interest any longer

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Originally posted by Berlichtingen:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

Hell, you Australians root for CRICKET ... cricket for Gawd's sake!

Joe, given a choice of rooting and cricket or just cricket alone, which would you take? Let's face it, cricket is as exciting as watching paint dry, so a little rooting to liven things up ain't a bad idea...

...Oh, I forgot... at your age, rooting holds no interest any longer</font>

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Originally posted by Noba:

BooAddley spake thus,

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />He sure talks big for a guy who was probably conceived in the backseat of a clown car.

Those Mormon's sure have a lot to answer for...

Damn birth records have everything on them.

Now, my friend.... so as not to waste your life on going to the doctor to get the callouses on your hands bandaged every day, send a set up.

QB 1500 points meeting will be fine, your choice the rest.

Noba.</font>

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Originally posted by Weasel64:

sniffs air

*piffling prelude*

Yes, this must be the right place.

*waffling afterthought*

Hey, have I offended someone? Your post reminds me of lumpy gravy. There's no need to freak out man - is this your version of Chunga's Revenge or what. There's just no need to go poncing around like those playground psychotics is there??

Pah! You are what you is I say, and you're interlude is like a ship arriving too late to save a drowning witch! Do you really think your the Man from Utopia or somefink? Geez, Berli, methinks its them or us sometimes.

Actually, there's some-thing fish-y about this SSN. I suspect he is no less than a descendant of Sheik Yerbouti, probably into playing a mystery disc of jazz from hell, or even something more eclectic like Frank Zappa - The Lost Episodes!

Out with it damned Spot! I hereby declare you to be a descendant of the Old Man himself! A veritable Zappa-ite! Deny that if you can and keep a straight face! Who knows? If YOU make squire (and I suspect THAT will take an eternity) you may be set a TASK by your Liege that will shock your hair straight!

You might survive if you are prepared to Challenge someone. So mind the excrement - or else SOD OFF!! (whichever you prefer........)

AussieJeff

Official SOB (Squire of Berli)

--------------------

The number of medals on an officer's breast varies in inverse proportion to the square of the distance of his duties from the front line.

--Charles Edward Montague--

[ March 21, 2002, 09:47 PM: Message edited by: AussieJeff ]

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Originally posted by YK2:

<FONT COLOR = RED><LARGE>OHHHHH I like it. does it work with bold as well? :D

<FONT COLOR = BLUE> shame its so bloody fiddly though.

<FONT COLOR = GREEN> YEP, a little bit of coloUr is just what the MBT was lacking. PENG will love it. :eek:

<FONT COLOR = YELLOW> BTW DAME PATCH speaking of colour I love the latest batch of pics, I always thought there was something fishy about JOE ;)

<FONT COLOUR = RED>

<FONT COLOR = BLACK><BIG>GAAAGHHH!!!!!</BIG>

What have I done!! <FONT COLOR = RED>The <FONT COLOR = YELLOW><BIG>Colour</BIG> <FONT COLOR = BLUE><BIG>Monster</BIG><SUP><FONT COLOR = GREEN>tm</SUP><FONT COLOR = BLACK> is on the loose.........

AussieJeff

Official SOB (Squire of Berli)

--------------------

The number of medals on an officer's breast varies in inverse proportion to the square of the distance of his duties from the front line.

--Charles Edward Montague--

[ March 21, 2002, 09:44 PM: Message edited by: AussieJeff ]

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Originally posted by Boo_Radley:

Here. <SMALL><SMALL>I.</SMALL></SMALL> Am.

Oh really? You mean, you actually EXIST??? I thought <SMALL><SMALL>you</SMALL></SMALL> were just a disfigurement of Croda's lurid imagination. Well, go figger.

<SMALL><SMALL>You</SMALL></SMALL> will receive a horrific, evil setup ensuring your untimely demise when <BIG><BIG><BIG>I</BIG></BIG></BIG> get the time. Probably in a millenium or two. Until then, SOD ORF!

AussieJeff

Official SOB (Squire of Berli)

--------------------

The number of medals on Boo-Hoo's breast varies in inverse proportion to the square of the distance of his personage from the front line.

--AussieJeff--

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Roight!

In the interest of satisfying this eternal foreign wonder and awe of all things Australian, I present to you ferrin types......

This weekends footy tips!

(i) Broncos over Bulldogs

(1F) Sharks over Melbourne Storm (sorry Mace)

(~) Knights over Cowboys (*sniff*)

(12) Raiders over Rabbitos

(7b) Dragons over Panthers

(oo) Eels over Tigers

(.) Warriors over Roosters

There you go, you Aussie-wannabees. Now you can impress all your freinds and co-workers with your intimate knowledge of the UberAustralis game of choice.

Especially you Joe, I know you root for all these teams.

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Originally posted by AussieJeff:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Boo_Radley:

Here. <SMALL><SMALL>I.</SMALL></SMALL> Am.

Oh really? You mean, you actually EXIST??? I thought <SMALL><SMALL>you</SMALL></SMALL> were just a disfigurement of Croda's lurid imagination. Well, go figger.

<SMALL><SMALL>You</SMALL></SMALL> will receive a horrific, evil setup ensuring your untimely demise when <BIG><BIG><BIG>I</BIG></BIG></BIG> get the time. Probably in a millenium or two. Until then, SOD ORF!

AussieJeff

Official SOB (Squire of Berli)

--------------------

The number of medals on Boo-Hoo's breast varies in inverse proportion to the square of the distance of his personage from the front line.

--AussieJeff--</font>

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Originally posted by Persephone:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by MrPeng:

As for the loverly and talented Allison, She has agreed to meet with me at predetermined time and space co-ordinates. I have lost my mind. She will be mine.

That is all.

Peng

And MrPeng was telling the truth...

So Peng met the loverly and talented Allison at the Karaoke bar...all he had to do was sing one duet with her and she would be...all his...

PengKaraoke.jpg

Persephone</font>

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Originally posted by MrPeng:

but we are sorry to report that this particular Pod is so thoroughly depressedwe may never pull out of it.

What an utter foolishness it is to be Peng

Really, Peng, it could still be so much worse. While you were in the gentleman's at Glueks bar, Berli and I seriously discussed selling you to that horrible woman who was waving at you. I can't remember just now why we decided against it.
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Originally posted by YK2:

<FONT COLOR = RED><LARGE>OHHHHH I like it. does it work with bold as well? :D

<FONT COLOR = BLUE> shame its so bloody fiddly though.

<FONT COLOR = GREEN> YEP, a little bit of coloUr is just what the MBT was lacking. PENG will love it. :eek:

<FONT COLOR = YELLOW> BTW DAME PATCH speaking of colour I love the latest batch of pics, I always thought there was something fishy about JOE ;)

<FONT COLOUR = RED>

Goodness, what the...I believe I'm finally having one of those 'flashbacks' the 'Just Say No' folks were always on about...AGGGGGHHHH! THE SPIDERS ARE COMING, THE SPIDERS ARE COMING!!!!
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Originally posted by Stuka:

Roight!

In the interest of satisfying this eternal foreign wonder and awe of all things Australian, I present to you ferrin types......

This weekends footy tips!

(i) Broncos over Bulldogs

(1F) Sharks over Melbourne Storm (sorry Mace)

(~) Knights over Cowboys (*sniff*)

(12) Raiders over Rabbitos

(7b) Dragons over Panthers

(oo) Eels over Tigers

(.) Warriors over Roosters

There you go, you Aussie-wannabees. Now you can impress all your freinds and co-workers with your intimate knowledge of the UberAustralis game of choice.

Especially you Joe, I know you root for all these teams.

Methinks Joe eats, roots and leaves.

AussieJeff

Official SOB (Squire Of Berli)

--------------------

There is only the Pool .....

Nothing but the Pool.

What else is life?

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Originally posted by AussieJeff:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by YK2:

<LARGE>OHHHHH I like it. does it work with bold as well? :D

shame its so bloody fiddly though.

YEP, a little bit of coloUr is just what the MBT was lacking. PENG will love it. :eek:

BTW DAME PATCH speaking of colour I love the latest batch of pics, I always thought there was something fishy about JOE ;)

<BIG>GAAAGHHH!!!!!</BIG>

What have I done!! The <BIG>Colour Monster</BIG><SUP>tm</SUP> is on the loose.........

AussieJeff

Official SOB (Squire of Berli)

--------------------

The number of medals on an officer's breast varies in inverse proportion to the square of the distance of his duties from the front line.

--Charles Edward Montague--</font>

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