Lars Posted April 17, 2003 Share Posted April 17, 2003 Originally posted by OGSF: Ah took delivery o' tha British Paratrooper, tha 101st Paratrooper an' tha Ranger sodjer thus evenin'. Hmm, a guy who wears a dress likes to play with dolls. Who'd a thunk it? SSN Hint Of The Day: Have your secretary do all your personal shopping. Now sod off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lars Posted April 17, 2003 Share Posted April 17, 2003 Originally posted by OGSF: Ah took delivery o' tha British Paratrooper, tha 101st Paratrooper an' tha Ranger sodjer thus evenin'. Hmm, a guy who wears a dress likes to play with dolls. Who'd a thunk it? SSN Hint Of The Day: Have your secretary do all your personal shopping. Now sod off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest PondScum Posted April 17, 2003 Share Posted April 17, 2003 Originally posted by OGSF: <font size=-1>Some o'yoo bastarrrds might like tae tak a wee gander here.</font>You mad little haggis-chewer, how can you not have bought the talking Iraqi information minister doll for your "l33t troops" to beat up on? Do it now, man. DO IT. Or your belly will burn in hell. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest PondScum Posted April 17, 2003 Share Posted April 17, 2003 Originally posted by OGSF: <font size=-1>Some o'yoo bastarrrds might like tae tak a wee gander here.</font>You mad little haggis-chewer, how can you not have bought the talking Iraqi information minister doll for your "l33t troops" to beat up on? Do it now, man. DO IT. Or your belly will burn in hell. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hortlund Posted April 17, 2003 Author Share Posted April 17, 2003 G...DAMN girls are strange. Strange is not the word. They are beyond strange, they...they just ARE. Its like no laws of logic or reason apply to them. Alright, alright...I already knew THAT. I mean, I've been around them one way or another for quite a while. But sometimes you just have to sit in amazement and wonder what the he** makes them tick. So anyway, I was dating this girl a couple of weeks ago. Everything was going fine I even got to meet her kids, and she got to meet mine (shes a single mom, and Im a single dad). Everything was juuust fine. (Meeting the kids is a big step btw in case you didnt figure that one out for yourself.) Then for some unknown reason she started backtracking. You know the drill, cancel a coffe-date, dont call when she's supposed too, stays off ICQ more than usual etc etc. So I figured, alright, she needs some space. I can handle that, and I backed off. Like, didnt call her, didnt look her up on ICQ. Talk to her and be friendly when she called and stuff, but always letting her take the initiative. Well, then about a week ago she called me up on the phone and "wanted to talk". Great...I thought. Basically she was doing the old "lets be friends instead"-routine. Complete with the "this is going too fast" and the "I need some time alone to find myself"-spin. Fine, I can take that. I mean its not as if I havent been dumped before. But if there is one thing I've learned, its that the "lets be friends"-part never works. NEVER. No matter what. No, Nein, nicht, verboten. It doesnt work that way, because there is always one who wants to be more than friends, and one that wants to be friends (or less). Trying to be friends will only extend the torture on the poor sod who wants more (in this case me). So I told her, when the "but you are such a great guy and I dont want to lose you as a friend"-speech came at the end of the "I need my space"-conversation.... I told her, sorry, but that just wont happen. There is no way in he** I'm going to try to start some friendship here. Then she started crying...for some obscure reason. I know I know, they cry because they feel really bad for breaking our hearts. But its still a really weird situation when the girl breaks up with you and breaks down in tears all the time. Your left sitting there going "uh, you DO know YOU are breaking up with ME here and not the other way around." ANYWAY. blah blah, I need my space, I just wish you could reconsider and be my friend, because I need you as a friend and you understand me and I need the support blah blah blah. And I was going, look, I've already said no. So anyway, she broke up with me, and that was that. I havent called her, havent emailed her, I deleted her number from my phone, deleted her name from my ICQ, deleted her email adress...everything gone. So guess what... Guess who called me about an hour ago practically begging me to give her another chance. How she really really wants to have another chance. How she misses me and how she wants to talk to me and how she wants to [deleted because it's not for kids, and I know some of you are aged 14...at least you behave that way... Nidan and Vadr and Lars...and...well just about everyone here really]. Girls are weird. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hortlund Posted April 17, 2003 Author Share Posted April 17, 2003 G...DAMN girls are strange. Strange is not the word. They are beyond strange, they...they just ARE. Its like no laws of logic or reason apply to them. Alright, alright...I already knew THAT. I mean, I've been around them one way or another for quite a while. But sometimes you just have to sit in amazement and wonder what the he** makes them tick. So anyway, I was dating this girl a couple of weeks ago. Everything was going fine I even got to meet her kids, and she got to meet mine (shes a single mom, and Im a single dad). Everything was juuust fine. (Meeting the kids is a big step btw in case you didnt figure that one out for yourself.) Then for some unknown reason she started backtracking. You know the drill, cancel a coffe-date, dont call when she's supposed too, stays off ICQ more than usual etc etc. So I figured, alright, she needs some space. I can handle that, and I backed off. Like, didnt call her, didnt look her up on ICQ. Talk to her and be friendly when she called and stuff, but always letting her take the initiative. Well, then about a week ago she called me up on the phone and "wanted to talk". Great...I thought. Basically she was doing the old "lets be friends instead"-routine. Complete with the "this is going too fast" and the "I need some time alone to find myself"-spin. Fine, I can take that. I mean its not as if I havent been dumped before. But if there is one thing I've learned, its that the "lets be friends"-part never works. NEVER. No matter what. No, Nein, nicht, verboten. It doesnt work that way, because there is always one who wants to be more than friends, and one that wants to be friends (or less). Trying to be friends will only extend the torture on the poor sod who wants more (in this case me). So I told her, when the "but you are such a great guy and I dont want to lose you as a friend"-speech came at the end of the "I need my space"-conversation.... I told her, sorry, but that just wont happen. There is no way in he** I'm going to try to start some friendship here. Then she started crying...for some obscure reason. I know I know, they cry because they feel really bad for breaking our hearts. But its still a really weird situation when the girl breaks up with you and breaks down in tears all the time. Your left sitting there going "uh, you DO know YOU are breaking up with ME here and not the other way around." ANYWAY. blah blah, I need my space, I just wish you could reconsider and be my friend, because I need you as a friend and you understand me and I need the support blah blah blah. And I was going, look, I've already said no. So anyway, she broke up with me, and that was that. I havent called her, havent emailed her, I deleted her number from my phone, deleted her name from my ICQ, deleted her email adress...everything gone. So guess what... Guess who called me about an hour ago practically begging me to give her another chance. How she really really wants to have another chance. How she misses me and how she wants to talk to me and how she wants to [deleted because it's not for kids, and I know some of you are aged 14...at least you behave that way... Nidan and Vadr and Lars...and...well just about everyone here really]. Girls are weird. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest konrad Posted April 17, 2003 Share Posted April 17, 2003 Originally posted by Leutnant Hortlund: Girls are weird. Romeo and Juliet met online in a chat room. But they relationship ended tragically when Juliet's hard drive died. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest konrad Posted April 17, 2003 Share Posted April 17, 2003 Originally posted by Leutnant Hortlund: Girls are weird. Romeo and Juliet met online in a chat room. But they relationship ended tragically when Juliet's hard drive died. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted April 17, 2003 Share Posted April 17, 2003 Lt. Hortland, I've said this before and I'll say it again. Run from girls, lad. Die alone and afraid. (But if my wife, the ever charming and violent, SheWhoMustBeObeyed asks you, you never heard this from me!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted April 17, 2003 Share Posted April 17, 2003 Lt. Hortland, I've said this before and I'll say it again. Run from girls, lad. Die alone and afraid. (But if my wife, the ever charming and violent, SheWhoMustBeObeyed asks you, you never heard this from me!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nidan1 Posted April 17, 2003 Share Posted April 17, 2003 Hortlund , sit back, take a deep breath, and remember one thing. The world is a big place, and there are millions and millions of females out there. Women have a strange need to be friends with guys, somehow they have abilities far beyond what we have, i.e the ability to sublimate sexual attraction and channel it to some other form. Men want sex, women want "friendship", it may eventually lead to sex, but then it ruins the "friendship". When a woman starts talking about being your "friend", its over, no sex there my lad, run like hell. American women are famous for this ploy, I'm surprised Swedish women have developed this attitude, I guess "Cosmo" has a Swedish edition? IMHO, it is impossible for men and women to be friends, in the male sense of that word, the differences between sexes is just too great, you can be colleagues, partners, lovers, but never friends. Keep looking, eventually one will come along that meets your needs and doesnt want to be your friend. [ April 17, 2003, 02:19 PM: Message edited by: Nidan1 ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nidan1 Posted April 17, 2003 Share Posted April 17, 2003 Hortlund , sit back, take a deep breath, and remember one thing. The world is a big place, and there are millions and millions of females out there. Women have a strange need to be friends with guys, somehow they have abilities far beyond what we have, i.e the ability to sublimate sexual attraction and channel it to some other form. Men want sex, women want "friendship", it may eventually lead to sex, but then it ruins the "friendship". When a woman starts talking about being your "friend", its over, no sex there my lad, run like hell. American women are famous for this ploy, I'm surprised Swedish women have developed this attitude, I guess "Cosmo" has a Swedish edition? IMHO, it is impossible for men and women to be friends, in the male sense of that word, the differences between sexes is just too great, you can be colleagues, partners, lovers, but never friends. Keep looking, eventually one will come along that meets your needs and doesnt want to be your friend. [ April 17, 2003, 02:19 PM: Message edited by: Nidan1 ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hortlund Posted April 17, 2003 Author Share Posted April 17, 2003 Oh man, If I had a dollar everytime anyone said that to me...I'd have at least 10 bucks. Problem is if you take all those millions and millions of girls, and first subtract the ones you'll never meet, then subtract those who are too old or too young, then subtract those with a different attitude towards their personal hygiene (there are more in that category than you'd ever want to think about), then subtract the ones who are just plain dumb, then subtract the ugly ones, then subtract those who finds me unattractive, then subtract those who for whatever reason doesnt want to be in a relationship with me, then subtract those with too much baggage (there are those too) then subtract those who dont want a guy who already have kids, the subtract those with relationships, then subtract all those that do something stupid on the first date (like the girl who told me that her biggest turnon was to have a guy LICK her eyeballs...I kid you not. Girl -"Something that turns me on is when the guy puts his tounge in my eye" Me (thinking) "Why does this always happen to me") I know this sounds harsh Nidan but once you subtract all those girls, you might be left with what...10-15 girls? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hortlund Posted April 17, 2003 Author Share Posted April 17, 2003 Oh man, If I had a dollar everytime anyone said that to me...I'd have at least 10 bucks. Problem is if you take all those millions and millions of girls, and first subtract the ones you'll never meet, then subtract those who are too old or too young, then subtract those with a different attitude towards their personal hygiene (there are more in that category than you'd ever want to think about), then subtract the ones who are just plain dumb, then subtract the ugly ones, then subtract those who finds me unattractive, then subtract those who for whatever reason doesnt want to be in a relationship with me, then subtract those with too much baggage (there are those too) then subtract those who dont want a guy who already have kids, the subtract those with relationships, then subtract all those that do something stupid on the first date (like the girl who told me that her biggest turnon was to have a guy LICK her eyeballs...I kid you not. Girl -"Something that turns me on is when the guy puts his tounge in my eye" Me (thinking) "Why does this always happen to me") I know this sounds harsh Nidan but once you subtract all those girls, you might be left with what...10-15 girls? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest konrad Posted April 17, 2003 Share Posted April 17, 2003 Originally posted by Leutnant Hortlund: I know this sounds harsh Nidan but once you subtract all those girls, you might be left with what...10-15 girls? Woow ,never occured to you that maybe that not the girls fault? Girls are amazing and there is nothing wrong with them .Sadly/happily ,I'm married now ,so that for me this side of live is over (well...) Try to change or something and get yourself together.There is no better friend in the world for man then woman . konrad edited to say that I try to lick my wife eyeball,and ,yes that was ,I mean ,...how to say it ..oh , yes ,that was nice. [ April 17, 2003, 03:32 PM: Message edited by: lenakonrad ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest konrad Posted April 17, 2003 Share Posted April 17, 2003 Originally posted by Leutnant Hortlund: I know this sounds harsh Nidan but once you subtract all those girls, you might be left with what...10-15 girls? Woow ,never occured to you that maybe that not the girls fault? Girls are amazing and there is nothing wrong with them .Sadly/happily ,I'm married now ,so that for me this side of live is over (well...) Try to change or something and get yourself together.There is no better friend in the world for man then woman . konrad edited to say that I try to lick my wife eyeball,and ,yes that was ,I mean ,...how to say it ..oh , yes ,that was nice. [ April 17, 2003, 03:32 PM: Message edited by: lenakonrad ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nidan1 Posted April 17, 2003 Share Posted April 17, 2003 Originally posted by Leutnant Hortlund: Oh man, If I had a dollar everytime anyone said that to me...I'd have at least 10 bucks. Problem is if you take all those millions and millions of girls, and first subtract the ones you'll never meet, then subtract those who are too old or too young, then subtract those with a different attitude towards their personal hygiene (there are more in that category than you'd ever want to think about), then subtract the ones who are just plain dumb, then subtract the ugly ones, then subtract those who finds me unattractive, then subtract those who for whatever reason doesnt want to be in a relationship with me, then subtract those with too much baggage (there are those too) then subtract those who dont want a guy who already have kids, the subtract those with relationships, then subtract all those that do something stupid on the first date (like the girl who told me that her biggest turnon was to have a guy LICK her eyeballs...I kid you not. Girl -"Something that turns me on is when the guy puts his tounge in my eye" Me (thinking) "Why does this always happen to me") I know this sounds harsh Nidan but once you subtract all those girls, you might be left with what...10-15 girls? You could always try lowering your standards...BTW that eyeball licking one sounds pretty cool. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nidan1 Posted April 17, 2003 Share Posted April 17, 2003 Originally posted by Leutnant Hortlund: Oh man, If I had a dollar everytime anyone said that to me...I'd have at least 10 bucks. Problem is if you take all those millions and millions of girls, and first subtract the ones you'll never meet, then subtract those who are too old or too young, then subtract those with a different attitude towards their personal hygiene (there are more in that category than you'd ever want to think about), then subtract the ones who are just plain dumb, then subtract the ugly ones, then subtract those who finds me unattractive, then subtract those who for whatever reason doesnt want to be in a relationship with me, then subtract those with too much baggage (there are those too) then subtract those who dont want a guy who already have kids, the subtract those with relationships, then subtract all those that do something stupid on the first date (like the girl who told me that her biggest turnon was to have a guy LICK her eyeballs...I kid you not. Girl -"Something that turns me on is when the guy puts his tounge in my eye" Me (thinking) "Why does this always happen to me") I know this sounds harsh Nidan but once you subtract all those girls, you might be left with what...10-15 girls? You could always try lowering your standards...BTW that eyeball licking one sounds pretty cool. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hortlund Posted April 17, 2003 Author Share Posted April 17, 2003 Originally posted by lenakonrad: never occured to you that maybe that not the girls fault? Uh..I've never said it is the girls fault. It most certainly isnt. All I'm saying is that I dont understand them. Of cource I'm not going to lower my standards. I'd rather wait 10 years for miss Right, than go down to the nearest pub and grab miss right-now. And, as you say, the girls do have a say in the matter too. The lovelife must have been so much easier in the neolithic age. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hortlund Posted April 17, 2003 Author Share Posted April 17, 2003 Originally posted by lenakonrad: never occured to you that maybe that not the girls fault? Uh..I've never said it is the girls fault. It most certainly isnt. All I'm saying is that I dont understand them. Of cource I'm not going to lower my standards. I'd rather wait 10 years for miss Right, than go down to the nearest pub and grab miss right-now. And, as you say, the girls do have a say in the matter too. The lovelife must have been so much easier in the neolithic age. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nidan1 Posted April 17, 2003 Share Posted April 17, 2003 While you're crying in your brew, don't forget to send me a turn, getting pounded may take your mind off your pathetic love life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nidan1 Posted April 17, 2003 Share Posted April 17, 2003 While you're crying in your brew, don't forget to send me a turn, getting pounded may take your mind off your pathetic love life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hortlund Posted April 17, 2003 Author Share Posted April 17, 2003 Originally posted by Nidan1: that eyeball licking one sounds pretty cool. Oh it might sound cool now. But trust me, the words "lick my eyeballs" spoken by a young (and surprisingly beautiful) girl in a university dorm room late at night, can be surprisingly scary. I know my first reaction was along the lines of "ewwww, I dont even want to think about that would feel...to lick on someones open eye". But the second reaction was along the lines of "and this is what she is telling me, I wonder what shes not telling me." It definitively felt like a psycho warning on that girl. And I sure as he** dont want to be naked with someone like that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hortlund Posted April 17, 2003 Author Share Posted April 17, 2003 Originally posted by Nidan1: that eyeball licking one sounds pretty cool. Oh it might sound cool now. But trust me, the words "lick my eyeballs" spoken by a young (and surprisingly beautiful) girl in a university dorm room late at night, can be surprisingly scary. I know my first reaction was along the lines of "ewwww, I dont even want to think about that would feel...to lick on someones open eye". But the second reaction was along the lines of "and this is what she is telling me, I wonder what shes not telling me." It definitively felt like a psycho warning on that girl. And I sure as he** dont want to be naked with someone like that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hortlund Posted April 17, 2003 Author Share Posted April 17, 2003 Originally posted by Nidan1: While you're crying in your brew, don't forget to send me a turn, getting pounded may take your mind off your pathetic love life. hehe, didnt you read my post? She was calling me asking for me to give her another chance. In my book that is a good sign. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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