dalem Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by jshandorf: Damn! And just when I was looking to hone my blade for the upcoming tourney. Crushing the likes of Dalem and Seanachai just doesn't cut the mustard as "serious" training. More of a leisure activity if you ask me. Crap! Double Crap! Jeff<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> O, how you wound me, Sir! Don't know if I'm "Crap" or "Double Crap", but either way that's worthy of another challenge from me. One of these days I'll get back to you and your tactical ways. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Speedbump Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by MrSpkr: Did you sacrifice a goat and a bottle of whiskey with that prayer?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Thought about it, but Mace and Iskander would have sacrificed me! Speedbump Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Panzer Leader: That is how I feel about you Lords of the Cess right now -- ashamed and disappointed. Man, you all bum me out, send me set-up, all'ya, I wanna kick all your asses. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> SCENE I. A desert place. Thunder and lightning. Enter three Figures (that is, quite clearly, with a capital, as opposed to lower case f). One is a dark Figure cloaked in smoke and flame, one is a grim, judgemental Figure with crossed arms. The last is a capering old man wearing tattered robes, who appears to be singing quietly to himself a song about a hedgehog. Berli When shall we three meet again In thunder, lightning, or in rain? Seanachai When the hurlyburly's done, When the battle's lost and won. Peng That will be ere the set of sun. Berli Where the place? Seanachai Upon the heath. Peng There to meet with…Here, why can’t we meet in a nice pub for a change? Seanachai Well, I don’t know, Peng. Traditionally, we meet out here in the wasteland. Berli There’s no SSNs, for one thing. But I wouldn’t say no to some place with a decent pint of Guinness, or a nice single malt. Peng And plenty of it! Seanachai Alright, then. Next time we’ll meet in a nice pub. No reason, actually, that we can’t create one right there in the wasteland, for that matter. That’s the grand thing about being Old Ones of the ‘Pool, create any bloody thing you like. Peng Just have to remember to uncreate it when we push on. I’m not leaving a nice pub sitting around for the rest of the SSNs and Squires to find waiting for them. Berli Too right! Seanachai That’s fine, then. Until then, here. (produces bottle from under rather tattered robes. Berli examines the label critically) Berli That’s not a single malt. Peng Who cares! Gimme! (dramatic sounds of swallowing) Seanachai No, it’s Jamesons. A nice catholic whiskey. Berli If you’re quite done, Peng. (less desperate sounds of drinking) Seanachai In any case, we must decide, and then off to the heath to meet with whoever we choose for the Winecape Invitational. Berli Who’s on the shortlist? Seanachai Hmm…Geier, Mark IV, OGSF, Pawbroon, Iskander, Hiram, and – Shandorf. Peng Send Hiram. Seanachai He’s doing Real World things, is my understanding. Can’t do it. Peng Send The French. That’s psychological warfare, that is. Seanachai More than our life’s worth to cut into his personal life time. You know, modding, posting, Emma. (they exchange significant looks) Peng No good, then. What about the others? Seanachai They’ve all declined, except Geier, who’s not responding at all, which is what Scandos do to be polite rather than saying no. And OGSF may have declined, it was difficult to tell. Berli Who wants to do it? Seanachai That’s Shandorf. Quite emphatic about it, in fact. Rude. Berli Send the toad, then. Seanachai Well, we normally do have the policy that those who want to should not be allowed. Still, perhaps if we send along someone wiser, more experienced, more diplomatic to keep an eye on him and represent…the most established element of the ‘Pool’…(Peng and Seanachai exchange a look) Berli Oh no you don’t! Peng We’re agreed. Berli The Devil we are! Seanachai Don’t invoke yourself, it’s showy. Peng Serves you right after you made me Father Confessor. Seanachai It’s decided. Berli shall accompany Shandorf to the Invitational Tournament of Stars. Berli Bastards. Why me? Seanachai Because I’m an erratic player, and I’ve had pets die in the time it takes Peng to send a turn back. You’ll enjoy it. Now, we must to the heath, there to meet Shandorf! Peng We must what to the heath? Seanachai What? Oh, we must ‘away’ to the heath. Peng We must ‘away to the heath?’ What the – why the hell do you talk like that? Seanachai It’s literary, Peng Berli Anything left in the bottle? Seanachai Here. Peng Why the heath, for that matter? Why meet Shandorf on some scrubby uplands? Seanachai Do you want to be seen with Shandorf in a pub? BOTH (emphatically) No! Seanachai The heath it is, then. ALL Fair is foul, and foul is fair: Hover through the fog and filthy air. exeunt omnia to be continued [ 06-15-2001: Message edited by: Seanachai ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Panzer Leader Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 Hey, had an idea, could or next title be: The Peng Challenge Takes it to the Stars or perhaps: The Peng Callenge Tourney of the Stars Whaddya think? Good? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PawBroon Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 Enter two figures. One is naked (it could thus be Fair Yuk or that Crassy Frog) and the other one is naked. Huuh? That's settled then, let it be known that they are indeed Emma and Babble Bath... Emma: Why is it that you Squired that pesky Leg Humper Love? The mother ****ing hulk of a guy also known as Me: Did he hump you then? Emma: Naaah, don't fret, but I have the feeling that he tried to, masking his lust under a brotherly guise. The guy who's about to release a Starsky & Hutch WASP: Yeah, I can remember. That addled brain SSN is not even sly enough to ask me some of our pics. Emma: Not the ones you took showing my True Self?! Someone who had been taking pics of others' True Self: Awww Gawd no! Why would I do that? He is not even a registered user... Emma: Speaking of True Self, any news from that Long & Winding Road Senility? He who had been French since 1968: Sadly enough yes. Emma: Just how sad Pembelitos could be then Love? The Daltonian MODer: He just popped a mail where he was very thourough in the description of his intestine life Emma. Emma: The Bard?! I had been thinking he was into Novels when he was more of a Bowels guy all along! The disgusted digestive mailee: Yup YUK... Emma: What did you tell him then? I am neither Mace nor Mr4 and thus feel no shame: More or less that, Why are you telling me about your bowels? I mean, not even Emma mentions bowels to me unless it's with that playful glee of Sodomites. Emma: Sodomites? You sent them pics then?!!! He who would not released them on Photopoint: Nope, the Pemble does not dwell on those. That one feeds on books and undecipherable posts... Emma: That's good then. So why did you Squired that Jellyfish when you would not even bend to kick a pet? Shaken not stirred please: Because I was loosing Faith in that Pool. PL helped people celebrate my obnoxiousity while I wasn't even reading the forum anymore. He is like the Plague (and no Bauhaus it's not a town in Czech Republic), I unleashed him as a Trojan and I am proud of his work so far as even me feel ashame when I forget to skip his posts. Emma: So he is like Aitken's Aitken when Aitken is stoned to death or just normal then? The guy who is playing with Marco's Greyhound while buggers are waiting: Could be but that won't be fair to PL. Now let's scamper out and try that disgusting thing I've seen on CUseeMe yesterday... Ointment the Scene. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jshandorf Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Seanachai: The first long winded, but sitll a small story, from Seanchai that actually made me chuckle. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Besides, it my job to be rude. I have been doing it since I waded in here. Why quit now? Nobody else wants to job. Heck, I'll do it. Where is this heath? And if Peng is drunk again you guys keep and eye on him. Peng will try to mount anything when he gets a good litre of whiskey in him. Come to think of it, kind of like any Catholic I know... Jeff Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Agua Perdido Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Panzer Leader: Whaddya think? Good?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I take it back, dalem, I think it is Meeks. He's just being more subtle than I'd give him credit for after his regrettable "harpooner" personna. Agua Perdido [Edited because it's only 20 minutes to Wapner but more than 2 hours to Happy Hour.] [ 06-15-2001: Message edited by: Agua Perdido ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Agua Perdido Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 Move along, nothing to see here. [ 06-15-2001: Message edited by: Agua Perdido ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Panzer Leader Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 Omigod! I laughed, I cried, I fell down. I got drunk and it was good, all good. Mon Capitaine! Who would have thought that you could be humourous as well as indecipherable? Both at once, quelle une travaille! I laughed both times I read it (though... at different points each time... Strange...) but then I finally grasped the crux of the matter. Release the Starsky and Hutch mod! Its time the Fuzz came down hard on them Nazi crooks! Hey, monsieur, is that show still #1 on Paris Primetime? Also, to go with the shagadelica and the fuzz-mobile, could I put an order in for the "Dukes of Hazard Halftrack", the "Knight Rider M36 Jackson" and for the cream of the crop the "A-Team Priest", s'il vous plait? Yowza! [ 06-15-2001: Message edited by: Panzer Leader ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Panzer Leader Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 Shandorf this has gone on long enough! You sir (and I use that out of respect for my elders, NOT out of respesct for you, cur!) are a loud, obnoxious brutish neanderthal who percieves a succesful post in this thread as being "one where I got all my sentences with a period!" There is more to verbosity than what you claim! I cannot stand this filibustering any more! And what's more, if I hear one more time how you can kick so's so's ass, or how you are handing platters this way and that, I am gonna barf. My only hope is that I do it within range of your low-brow visage! This is not an ironman contest. You do not get graded on how high you lift up the volkswagon. At least the mockery of with and intelligence are required here, but sadly you come through the door with your sleeves rolled up and ready to work. In short (so you can understand me) we do not need a low-pants plumber to keep the cess pit clear of obstructions. As a matter of fact, your beer-bloated body would make a nice PLUG for said drain. And so, in honor of all that is good and right in this blasted land, across the gorse and through the kale, I call you out, dog that you are! May your digital blood pixellate the matrixes of my monitor! Since you claim to be "oh so good" here is what I suggest, puff-daddy, a quick battle. A quick battle where YOU, yes you, are on the defense, AS THE ALLIES! And I with pure nordic smile and clear locks will storm troop your craven, trembling buttocks, and send them home to mama bruised! As for parameters, I care not. I will deal with you as judiciously as you deserve, one digital death by one. Make it between 1,000 and 3,000 points. I don't need no 2 HTs vs a flakwagen or the 11th Army takes on Von Kluge. I am so confident that I will show YOU where your money is (in your snaggly tooth grin) that I will even place a wager on this contest. If you win (ha~! though my record is abysmal having won approximately 1/8th of the games I've played) if you win, I will proclaim you "Warmaster Supreme" and you will gain, as a trophy, my most prized possession - The quote by Conan in my sig. If I win (and so it is written so it shall be) you will leave this stinking filth after writing up in complete sentences and with heartfelt tears, how I have shown you the meaning of mercy, by knocking you off the gilded needle upon which you pirouette like the gay little girl you are! To arms, scurrilous wretch! For tomorrow you die! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phillies Phan Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 PL, if I give you a nickel would you shut up? Please? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lawyer Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Phillies Phan: PL, if I give you a nickel would you shut up? Please?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I'll toss in another nickel for a worthy cause such as this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 Seanachai!, Correction! <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Seanachai: Berli Bastards. Why me?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> What I said was... <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Berli: Filthy, rat, bastards. Why me?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Get your facts straight Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Panzer Leader Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 Pardon me Hiram, but where the hell were you yesterday when we were actually COUNTING on you? Oh, indisposed at the time, well all-righty then! I do not believe that Handjob needs his nerdy bespectacled friend (read: free snacks) to come to his salvation now, so if you please, give your nickel to the Lawyer up there, he would've ended up with it anyway. Speaking of which, notice how the guy is silent for days on end, but then within second of a nickel flashing in the sun, he descends like a raptor to its prey? Eerie.... I have laid down the gauntlet and seek vengeance. While its true that I prefer "Fancy-pants" (and all those other colorful mockeries) to the crude "Panties" I have pulled my dirk and thrown it to the floor before Jamblarf and desire only for justice to be done. Or perhaps Hiram you were worried that our 'hero and saviour" needed to rest before his big day at the tourney? Feh... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Lawyer: I'll toss in another nickel for a worthy cause such as this.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Hell! I think I have a quarter here somewhere... Yes! I contribute a quarter Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Panzer Leader Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 So, whaddya say Shenandoah? We've got $.35 riding on it so far. Care to defend against my assault? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geier Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 Holy****Ican'tbelievethis! OK. let's settle down for a bit. I am going to share some personal news here and now. Abuse will get you about as far flattery. This is possibly the weirdest news I've ever had via email. Here is the story. Read and learn. Ten years ago I had a great friend, Hans wasn't (isn't) his name. We did manly stuff together, we played football (the merkin kind), we drank like fishies, chased wimmin and so on and so forth. His job (I definately didn't have a job, I wuz at the uni) was to train and terrorize young Swedish males and make them do stuff they didn't want to. In other words, he was a Second Lieutenant (Fänrik) in the Glorious Swedish Army. Then something happened. Hans decided to Go West and move to the Midwest of the US of A to study and to play football (still the Merkin kind). Hans spent four years at a college but usually came home during the summer when we would drink like fishies together. Then stuff happened and we didn't talk as often and he got married too (I was first of us though) and he stopped coming "home" during the summer and worked as a teacher at some kind of school for officers kids. Then he finally got here last summer and ... well, things didn't work out, I got pissed off for some reason and we never met up. We haven't spoken since. Hans is 34 years old today. Today I got an email from one of his friends over there. It contained his new address: Name and unit withheld MARINE CORPS RECRUIT DEPOT 3601 MIDWAY AVE SANDIEGO CA 92140-5333 This is just... weird. To top it off, ****heads are turning my hometown into a Mickey Mouse War Zone. I am now going to get quite drunk. See you there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
**YK2** Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Berlichtingen: Hell! I think I have a quarter here somewhere... Yes! I contribute a quarter<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Oh well if you guys can contribute then so can I. Hmmmmmm now where did I put that old 1/2p... on second thoughts better make it 10p Don't want to give us Scots a bad name. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Speedbump Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by YK2: Oh well if you guys can contribute then so can I. Hmmmmmm now where did I put that old 1/2p... on second thoughts better make it 10p Don't want to give us Scots a bad name.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> That's it people!! Let's give til it hurts! Keep your sight on the goal, a panties-less Pool! Speedbump Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by YK2: Oh well if you guys can contribute then so can I. Hmmmmmm now where did I put that old 1/2p... on second thoughts better make it 10p Don't want to give us Scots a bad name.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> This is an extremely old joke, but you can't stop me if you've heard it before, so there. A Scotsman goes into a pharmacy, strides up to the counter, and asks "How much for a prophylactic?" The pharmacist tells him "they're 12 for $8." "How much for just one?" The pharamacist shrugs, and tells him "They're $1 apiece." The Scotsman pulls out his wallet, and fishes out a ripped, battered, and frayed condom. "And how much to repair this one?" The pharmacist considers it, and tells him "Well, let's say 75 cents." The Scotsman tells him, "Aye, this'll bear some thinking on, then," gathers up the condom, and leaves. The next day he returns and announces: "Alright, lad, the Regiment has voted to repair!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Berlichtingen: Seanachai!, Correction! Get your facts straight<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Sorry, the crackling of the flames sometimes obscures some of your remarks. I missed the opening words on that one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Agua Perdido Posted June 16, 2001 Share Posted June 16, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by YK2: [further contributions toward her PawBroonian fellow-squire's colonization of some other thread]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> As mensch use to say (I think it was him... he stopped saying it a while back and I've probably got it wrong--well, bollocks, here it is anyway): "heres a penny now go away" Agua Perdido Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bauhaus Posted June 16, 2001 Share Posted June 16, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Berlichtingen: Hell! I think I have a quarter here somewhere... Yes! I contribute a quarter<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I'll throw in a dollar if it will shut the squire up. I didn't realize squires were allowed to sound off as much as panty liner does. Can we put him on a daily word limit? Like maybe three? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mace Posted June 16, 2001 Share Posted June 16, 2001 Better yet, can we replace him with the 100 monkeys using the 100 typewriters? Mace Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mace Posted June 16, 2001 Share Posted June 16, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by YK2: on second thoughts better make it 10p Don't want to give us Scots a bad name.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Ooooh, that must have hurt! Mace Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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