Welcome to Peng Challengeville!

[harpooner]

Agua perdido--How telling it is that your response to my posting about you was to mimic my complaint about you precisely. I have a friend with a four-year old daughter who likes to play the parrot game. It becomes insipid and annoying the first time that she does it, as well.

Thank you for going to the trouble of posting a reply which served only to prove the point I was making about your low level of intelligence and general lack of worthiness as a creative writer.

You are dull and boring and are representative of most of the specimens that I have encountered from the Deep-South. You probably eat too much fried food, and it has made you loguey and tedious. Your brain works too slowly for you to survive in a more advanced community like the Bay Area.

Y'all stay in the South now, where it's nice and safe (from intellectual challenge), y'hear?

Polly want cracker?

[Geier]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by David Aitken:

Mark One Mother, you, you... American! I was being ironic. (Hint: it has nothing to do with metal.)<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I think he sends his shirts to a service.

What noisy cats are we?

[MrSpkr]

Harpoontang boy-

We Southerner's aren't intellectually challenged; rather, we prefer to engage our brains before we begin to talk.

I recognize that is probably a foreign concept to one who lives in the land of free sex change operations and man-boy love, but it truly is a concept you ought to explore.

Who knows? Perhaps one day you'll overcome your current intellectual atrophy and . . .

No, that's probably a bit too much to hope for, isn't it? Well, at least you might be able to raise your communication skills to somewhere just above a gnu and just below a beagle. That would still be an improvement, wouldn't it?

I offer that encouraging advice not in the belief that you will actually be able to achieve anything worthwhile but rather in the giving, Christian spirit of attempting to provide hope in hopeless situations.

Y'all take care, ya hear?

MrSpkr

[harpooner]

Mr. Spkr You southerners are the byproducts of gnu's and beagles. Everyone knows that the only things that come from Texas are steers and queers. That you must flaunt your lack of tolerance for those who find themselves to be "gender-challenged" (LOL) only serves to underscore your limitations as an evolved human-being. I pity you for your aculturation as a wanna-be Nazi-cowboy. Are you supposed to be Boomer or Harry's less enlightened bald friend with the sunglasses?

I must admit that the few representations I have seen of Texans leave me in great fear for the future of Southern culture. We all still hate you for sending out your village idiot propped up with oil dollars to become our leader.

Keep your stupid Texican mores that have been baked up in an overgrown chili pot on an overheated desert of a landscape on your side of the border and we won't have any trouble. It's when you try to export your brand of intolerance and backwardness that things get a little prickly.

Texas-Where men are men and sheep are scared.

[David Aitken]

Despite my tanks taking out a few of his, my forces never recovered from the loss of essentially all 14 of my halftracks to Abbott's plane, which arrived at the outset and didn't leave for about 15 minutes. Of my two German motorized platoons, those that survived the strafing of their transport were either annihilated by artillery or overwhelmed by US infantry.

One of my Jägdpanzer IV's was immobilised by a gun before knocking it out, only to be finished off by a bazooka (despite covering fire from my remaining halftrack which was conveniently immobilised right behind it). The other one was engaged by a Sherman at four o'clock while on a Hunt command, doomed to slooowwly traverse while the Sherman popped off a few shots before eventually hitting its target.

My first Tiger had its turret at six o'clock to fire at some infantry (as I'd ordered) when it was taken out by a TD at three o'clock (I should have given it a rotation order as well... see, this is what happens when people complain about the TacAI – originally it worked half the time, then they changed it and now it works the other half of the time, but not the times it originally did...). I ordered my second Tiger to advance to outflank the TD, whereupon it targetted a Sherman which appeared at six o'clock, thus arriving near the TD with its turret backwards.

The AI awarded my heroic against-the-odds effort with an 18-82 automatic surrender.

Lorak, please record:

Abbott: Free beers for his pilot, for life.

Aitken: Expensive AA guns for my PBEMs, for life.

[MrSpkr]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by harpooner:

Mr. Spkr <Unenlightened, hallucinatory ravings of a Bay area, marijuana addled, smog ridden boytoy snipped here for culture and morality's sake> I must admit that the few representations I have seen of Texans leave me in great fear for the future of Southern culture.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Spoken with the grace and courage of a man whose dating life is like a box of chocolates - he's never sure what he is gonna get (down Bauhaus).

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>We all still hate you for sending out your village idiot propped up with oil dollars to become our leader.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

From the resident of a state that is so backwards it can't even keep the lights on, that is an amusing statement. Besides, if algore had won his home state . . . oh wait, he did win Washington, D.C. My bad.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Keep your stupid Texican mores that have been baked up in an overgrown chili pot on an overheated desert of a landscape on your side of the border and we won't have any trouble.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

At least I don't have to check very carefully to make sure my date doesn't have an Adam's apple. Being in a conservative state has definite advantages.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>It's when you try to export your brand of intolerance and backwardness that things get a little prickly.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

THAT'S NOT WHAT HE MEANS, Bauhaus!

Oh wait, he is from the City by the Gay, err, Bay. Maybe that is what he means. Sic' em, Bauhaus.

Sigh. You remind me of a lovesick teenager, trying to get over his first crush. You are jealous because you want to be in Texas, but you realize we would never accept you. The conflicting love-hate emotions must be driving you mad.

Luckily, there is a cure. It's about a forty-five minute run in your car.

Pull in the garage and close the door. Leave the car running, with the windows down. Wait forty-five minutes and voila'! No more jealousies!

I challenge you, Harpoon boy-toy. Although I expect you to fight like a girl, it will be amusing to watch your skirt wearing, glue sniffing, uneducated masses be mowed down by my powerful Texan troopers.

MrSpkr

[ 05-05-2001: Message edited by: MrSpkr ]

[Abbott]

PBEM

Dave’s troops fought valiantly even after being strafed repeatedly. I always have uncertain feelings when facing Tigers and this battle was no exception. I had started with two M-10’s and a platoon of Shermans (5) to accompany an infantry company and a 105 spotter.

I also had purchased the biggest gun I could find, a 90mm AA. The AA gun immobilized a MKIV TD just before it died nothing more. The M-10’s died horribly while trying to move into flanking positions, both hit catastrophically by 88’s. Two Shermans accompanying the initial infantry advance also died early. Three Shermans survived to move into the German force’s rear and flank. One Sherman actually received both Tiger kills.

The text below during a turn exchange sums it up pretty well..

Abbott- I still have to dig out that other infantry platoon from those woods. I am still un-certain what effect 100 rounds of 105mm had on them. One would think they were hurt.

Dave Aitken - they have been reduced to two unarmed men and a startled Hedgehog.

A very enjoyable game with a very enjoyable opponent.

[David Aitken]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Abbott wrote:

Dave Aitken - they have been reduced to two unarmed men and a startled Hedgehog.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I had a slightly different kind of 'arms' in mind...

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>It comprises two men with no arms and a startled hedgehog.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Abbott wrote:

A very enjoyable game with a very enjoyable opponent.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Steady on there, you'll get bauhaus all excited. The Peng Thread isn't what it used to be...

[harpooner]

Mr Spkr,

Haroog Texan swine...challenge expected and accepted.

I assume that you will want to play the Germans, as your bigoted, homo-phobic sendings are right in line with the Nazi philosophy which wound up executing them in ovens for a trait with which they were born.

I can only assume you espouse the same level of intolerant, inbred, macho, mi familia dogma that most cowboys and cattle-lovers spew at every turn. What are your feelings on Jews? Have them gassed as well is what it would appear. Are you sure you really belong in the legal profession, then? Maybe you ought to move to Idaho or East Germany. You might feel even more at home.

heh heh I KNEW that "Texican" swipe would get to you. Set up turn forthcoming.

:cool:

[Guest Babra]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by harpooner:

Mr Spkr,

Have them gassed as well is what it would appear<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I guess that would depend on the quantity of piquante sauce in his wife's chili. I've heard if the chemical energy could be harnessed, one bowl of it could light Paris for a month.

[Phillies Phan]

Tommorow is the Phillies Phanatic's birthday!! My lovely girlfriend and I will be in section 527 at Vet Stadium if you want to stop by and say hello. The game starts at 1:35.

I'll be the gentleman with a red hat with a white letter P on it. Just yell the words "combat mission" behind that section and I'll find you. hehe

Its rumored that the Pod and the King of South Philly should be there too. (bring a camera)

[harpooner]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Babra:

I guess that would depend on the quantity of piquante sauce in his wife's chili. I've heard if the chemical energy could be harnessed, one bowl of it could light Paris for a month. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

LOL...

I believe it's spelled picante sauce, old man. But what do you know? You're from Canada! You don't know from hot sauce! The hottest thing around up there is a polar bear's butt (down Bauhous)!

[MrSpkr]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Babra:

I guess that would depend on the quantity of piquante sauce in his wife's chili.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Picante sauce in chili? PICANTE SAUCE in CHILI??? ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND??!??

Think, fresh chili peppers. Chili powder. Onions. Fresh, ground dead cow. Cumin (just a touch). Jalapenos. Italian sausage. Pepperoni (for variety's sake). Tomato juice. Fresh, ripe tomatoes.

Geez. Picante sauce in chili. Silly Canuck - its people like you that invented "mild" (read wussy sweet crappy) picante sauce.

I suppose you drink those fruity drinks with umbrellas too, don't you.

MrSpkr

[ 05-05-2001: Message edited by: MrSpkr ]

[Guest Babra]

My bad. The only thing I know the ingredients of is toast. Bachelor dontcha know...

As for the picante/piquante situation, one is French and one is Spanish. Take yer pick if it matters.

Back to the hockey game...

[Abbott]

My bad. The only thing I know the ingredients of is toast- Babra

I recently learned the recipe for toast from Dave Aitken

Take one platoon of Shermans,

add two Tank destroyer’s and two Tigers.

Mix well.

Walah, Sherman toast!

[chrisl]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by harpooner:

Mr Spkr,

Haroog Texan swine...challenge expected and accepted.

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Let me know if you need a scenario, young squire. And lay off those smilies-- they'll draw a Penging.

I must compliment you on the nice job you did on the MrMouthpiece. Please do as well at handing him his ass.

[jd]

Having discovered that this thread possess within it's confines the answer to the incipent global energy shortage or conversely the source of global warming with the confluence of greenhouse gases, I am amazed at the verbal melagomanical mastubatory fundement upon which our mere existence pertains.....Oh well, As a simple contry lawyer (ie the one that actually uses the law to defend truth justice and the American retainer (I'll go with Raymond Burr in his pre Ironside days - better yet either Gregory Peck or Spencer Tracy) rather than Jakeleodeo who feasts upon the quivering carcass of his prey, I shall move to a quieter place to announce...

the demise of my former squire and uppity kniggit Ilossag'inder Achieving a 2-1 victory over his prostrate form (you may have him now Bauhaus, as he is well tenderized)

MrIamnotAlexandertheGreat was reduced to 2 intact squads as the angels of death caressed hs feverd brow, leading to his immediate and abjuect surrender. A fiting end to his disrespectful ways after I let him win our last game.

So LorakScrive thus:

jd - win

Iskander - loss

[ 05-05-2001: Message edited by: jd ]

[Mace]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by jd:

Oh well, As a simple contry lawyer <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I think I and my collegues would like to see stronger emphasis on simple please!

Thankyou

Mace

[ 05-05-2001: Message edited by: Mace ]

[Mace]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Phillies Phan:

Tommorow is the Phillies Phanatic's birthday!! <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

*pops out of a birthday cake*

Happy birthday to you,

Happy birthday to you,

you look like a monkey,

and you are one too!

Mace

PS If there ever was a case for an early pregnancy termination, I think this would be it!

[Phillies Phan]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Mace:

*pops out of a birthday cake*

Happy birthday to you,

Happy birthday to you,

you look like a monkey,

and you are one too!

Mace

PS If there ever was a case for an early pregnancy termination, I think this would be it! <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

That was lovely. Its not my birthday. Its for our team mascot The Phillies Phanatic. He doesn't play CM whereas I don't play well. Get it?

You must be from another country or something.

[Phillies Phan]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Mace:

*pops out of a birthday cake*

Happy birthday to you,

Happy birthday to you,

you look like a monkey,

and you are one too!

Mace

PS If there ever was a case for an early pregnancy termination, I think this would be it! <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

[Phillies Phan]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Phillies Phan:

Originally posted by Mace:

[qb]*pops out of a birthday cake*

Happy birthday to you,

Happy birthday to you,

you look like a monkey,

and you are one too!

Mace

PS If there ever was a case for an early pregnancy termination, I think this would be it! <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>[/QB]

double post

nothing to see here

[Mace]

Phan,

Call me pedantic but that is in fact a triple post!

As for that birthday thingy screwup, keep it in mind so I dont have to post again when it IS your birthday!

Mace

[rleete]

How pleased we are to see that Mace has learned to count to three. Good boy, you may have a cookie. Keep up the good work, and someday you might be honored enough to be asked to join the special olympics. But the mental image of you popping out of a cake is simply too much to bear. Even for the likes of P_Phan, it is horrendously revolting. Please refrain from such disgusting imagery, as the 'pool has no need for the contents of it's readers stomachs to be ejected forthwith.

[Joe Shaw]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Please refrain from such disgusting imagery, as the 'pool has no need for the contents of it's readers stomachs to be ejected forthwith.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>Are Geek, just a few quick questions and then a comment if I may? Thanks, won't be a jiff ... let's see ... ah, here it is: {ahem}

1) WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?

2) IS IT TRUE THAT YOU SIGNED UP FOR THE BOARD, NOT THE THREAD BUT THE BLOODY BOARD ALL OF TWO WEEKS AGO?

3) WHY THE HELL SHOULD WE CARE?

4) CAN YOU GIVE US ONE GOOD REASON YOU SHOULDN'T FRY IN A VAT OF USED CRISCO FOR ALL ETERNITY?

There, that should take care of the questions, please use a sharp #2 pencil and make sure all the ovals are filled in. As to the comment ...

WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE TO BE TAKING SIR MACE AND SIR PHILLIES PHAN TO TASK FOR ANYTHING? CRAWL BACK TO THE OUTER BOARD BEFORE YOU GET HURT!

Thanks ever so, we appreciate your visit and hope that you'll take this small token of our esteem ... ready Bauhaus?

Joe

[ 05-06-2001: Message edited by: Joe Shaw ]