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Mr. Shaw-

I do believe it's time for you to send me a set up. anything that is evenly balanced will do. I mean, after all, you seem to be obsessed with me sitting, so I might as well give you the honor of playing, St. Bauhaus of the Immaculate Thingy. Now sod off and get me a file man.

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Mr. Shaw- I do believe it's time for you to send me a set up. anything that is

evenly balanced will do.

A list of possible scenarios is electronically winging it's way to you at this very moment.
I mean, after all, you seem to be obsessed with me sitting...
Not at all, it's just that, given the options, I'd MUCH prefer that you be sitting ... I'd actually prefer that you be submerged but one can't ask for everything.
...so I might as well give you the honor of playing, St. Bauhaus of the Immaculate Thingy.
Riiiiigggghhhttt ... honor ... the very word for which I was searching.
Now sod off and get me a file man.
Well ... for rude!

Joe

------------------

I HAVE LOST A BLOOD HAMSTER TO PETERNZ. MY SIG FILE IS

HIS. PLEASE TICKLE MY FANCY BY GOING TO DER KESSEL .IF

YOU GO HE MIGHT STOP BEATING ME AND USING MY POOR

INNOCENT BODY FOR HIS OWN DEVIOUS PLEASURES

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Well I am a bit busy at work....still..

So here is a quick Tome update.

PeterNZ-win

Joe Shaw-loss

PeterNZ-win

Mensch-loss.

As for the rest of you buggers, Sorry my games were slow getting back this weekend.

You can all continue to die a lot now.

Lorak the loathed

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Guest *Captain Foobar*

Hello.

I am going to France.

I will be back on the 19th.

My battle with Roborat will end eventually.

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Oh Lorak nobody dies this is a gameyou fool

wink.gif

See you tonight on the field of pixelated honor you rascally wabbit.

Unless of course i get odered off. They never let finish my prey.

------------------

Sir are you sure you want to go to red alert...it would mean changing the bulb

-Kryton of Red Dwarf

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Originally posted by bauhaus:

?!?!?!?!?!? Even I have to draw the line here!!!!!! _________________(line)

Ahhh... the one and only Bauhaus! At last our crosses path! Little "RC" humor there, boyo, don't fret it!

Three items to note... so I shant be taxing your attention span. I sure you are quite busy enought with all the standupsitdowntalkoutshutup that you so richly deserve from we few, we happy few that swim so without fetters here in the 'Pool that is Cess.

Item the Firstest: We are all so happy that you are able to draw a line!!! M & P will be so proud!!! I know! Let's mount it (sit dow... er... um...) on the 'fridge!

Item the Secondest: As one "RC" to another (and me a convert even!)... what is with all this mummery? If it weren't for that oh-so-perfect 19-year-old across the aisle I might not even go. Since Y'shua used to hang with the dregs of society, do you think He'd be a 'Pooler now?

Item the Thirdest: I'd pay you more attention, but I must go scrape off this coating of bauhaus I seemed to have picked up just chatting with you... who has one of those Roman bath scraper thingies?

.

.

.

what? I said "thingies," yeah? So? No...stay back! NO, BAUHAUS! MY GOD! PUT THAT AWAY!!! NOOOOOO!!!!!!!

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"I send you a kaffis of mustard seed, that you may taste and acknowledge the bitterness of my victory."

"Legal advice is very often divorced from reality in my humble opinion" - BTS

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Well now, isn't that sweet...Mr Blowsmice is out trawling for games like he doesn't have a care in the world.

Muhahaaa. Let it be known that I am currently dishing out the kind of ass-kicking that 'ole Blowsey can only dream about.

As per a gentlemans agreement, we have embarked upon an infantry only game, no vehicular support of any kind.

The game so far, in a nutshell: My uberhamsters initially run forward and lightly hold 3 of the 4 VL's. Blowseys doughboys advance more cautiously to the same flags and suffer losses reaching them. His weight of numbers force my split squads to withdraw from those VLs and losses are about even.

Now here is the inspired part.

As blowsey consolidates his hold on the VLs, my HMG and arty opens up in a prearranged "turkey shoot", forcing his guys to cover and preventing his reinforcement of the center (major) VL. It is here that I have withdrawn all troops to a wooded area to the rear of the Flag, where they leave several split squads in 'hide' mode, the bulk of my force holes up in woods further to the rear. Sure enough the blowsien Arty barrage falls and falls and falls, on the forward (lightly manned) position until he is sure nothing remains standing. Oh ho ho! no sooner does the last shell fall when the glorious troopers of Stook arise and like a vast feldgrau mass, storm the US center position in force from 2 directions under covering HMG fire. Cries of "Woot!" rend the air as US squads break ranks and flee to the rear, only to be cut down like autumn wheat.

Oh yes, the sweetness of wholesale slaughter...Ummmmmm!

PS. Blowsey went 'veteran' too...MUAhhhahhhaaaaaaa!

News on other fronts, I hereby proclaim Peng to be a gamey rat git. Who else would send an empty wasp carrier for a hot lap of my town to scout out positions? Mind you, my tactical genius came to the fore once again, as a champion shreck team in 'hide' mode watched and waited as the wasp sped by, then with the coast supposedly clear, Peng gambles with a Daimler A/C only to get plinked by the same shreck team! Ho ho, 3 turns to go and the podman has a lot of work to do. Be vewwwy careful with those churchills Pengy, you may need them.

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Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

DekeFentle, may I suggest the following:

A true supplicates beginning.

1) Access to a dictionary and thesaurus does NOT necessarily result in a witty post. If you have something to say, say it, do not obfuscate it.

Your ineffectual attempt at insinuating I require the crutches of the illiterate masses to delineate your short-comings, leave the gentle reader to wonder at the lack of dust upon the tomes to which you refer, sitting less than arms length from your own keyboard. The verbose nature of my rambling is wit onto itself. If you ever extract your cerebral edifice, ensconced as it is between the two largest muscles of the human anatomy, you may be able to see the light of my poetic postulations.

The remaining drivel and platitudes are beneath notice. Except to ask if you consider the incessant references to the worn saw of instructing Bauhaus to find a resting place a key ingredient to a "witty post"?

Despite your apparent roll as the provider of literary pabulum for this mutated mass of mastoids. I will lower myself to engage you upon the field of conflict. Prove your worth you insufferable simpleton, or be forever known as the castrated conglomeration of guano who abased himself with kiasu towards The Whuppin' boy of PENG!

When the Whuppin' boy speaks, gather round and hearken well. Pain is humanities most eloquent mentor.

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Winning is why we play!

[This message has been edited by DekeFentle (edited 03-12-2001).]

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A true supplicates beginning... {snipped to remove boring verbosity}... this mutated mass of mastoids.
Oh lad ... mutated mass of mastoids ... PuhLEEZZZEEEE.
I will lower myself to engage you upon the field of conflict.
SON ... I am a Knight of the CessPool, you are a Squire ... kind of ... sort of ... in a manner of speaking. ERROR, ERROR, ERROR ... I beg the leave of the CessPool and apologize profusely for suggesting that the above referenced FOOL was a Squire ... Don't know what I was thinking, the lad has yet to attract a sponsor ... golly, wonder why. You are, unless I'm mistaken, already engaged in combat with my worthy and trusty squire, the WITTY, LEARNED and CAPABLE Agua Perdido. At some point in the future you MAY ascend to the rank of Knight {Hey, it COULD happen} ... but even then I wouldn't play you UNLESS you improve dramatically ... almost miraculously, in the meantime. I'm not holding my breath.

Joe

edited to correct grevious error

------------------

I HAVE LOST A BLOOD HAMSTER TO PETERNZ. MY SIG FILE IS

HIS. PLEASE TICKLE MY FANCY BY GOING TO DER KESSEL .IF

YOU GO HE MIGHT STOP BEATING ME AND USING MY POOR

INNOCENT BODY FOR HIS OWN DEVIOUS PLEASURES

[This message has been edited by Joe Shaw (edited 03-12-2001).]

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Posted by the anus-plug Hamsters:

Gamey? GAMEY?!?! Take a look at your bloody taunts, you nincompoop, that'll show you gamey. They're bad, boring, hackneyed, loser taunts. They deserve an interesting, sick, twisted destruction on the field of battle. You fool, if we were gamey, we'd do something so that we could beat you at the game of CM. Our purchases preclude any kind of victory. We are not, therefor, gamey, rather, you pulsating mass of useless flesh, we are interesting and we are subjecting you to an interesting torture. Being wholly uninteresting, it is no surprise that you do not understand this.

That responce sucks! Maybe you should try again?

First off;

You fool, if we were gamey, we'd do something so that we could beat you at the game of CM.

Huh? That is what giving a person an armor buy and picking close to nothing but mines and planes is. Trying to win, or just being a stupid hamster raping fool.

Second;

We are not, therefor, gamey, rather, you pulsating mass of useless flesh, we are interesting and we are subjecting you to an interesting torture. Being wholly uninteresting, it is no surprise that you do not understand this.

Interseting is not a wall of mines and a planes. Maybe if it were different, but every 15 year old fresh off of his mom's utter, has tried that.

So, stop posting your useless thoughts and send me the turn for our game. I has been a few days since I have seen that wall of crap you have put up. Or do you think I have been fooled by your gay alter-ego? So, stop putting the hamsters in your bum, wash your hands off, and send me the turn. And you spell therefore with an 'e'.

Armornut

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Lorak ... yo Lorak ... that clown is never around when you need him ... ah well,

[serious]Armornut we have been asked (and when you're ASKED by a large, bald, angry man who has MADD in his name you pay attention) to tone it down with reference to sexual, racial, anatomical ... stuff. So let's rein it in a bit okay?[/serious]

Right then, nothing to see here, move along.

Joe

------------------

I HAVE LOST A BLOOD HAMSTER TO PETERNZ. MY SIG FILE IS

HIS. PLEASE TICKLE MY FANCY BY GOING TO DER KESSEL .IF

YOU GO HE MIGHT STOP BEATING ME AND USING MY POOR

INNOCENT BODY FOR HIS OWN DEVIOUS PLEASURES

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Grr...

Barbarella has been hiding in the woods for sometime now. What a foul map. He waltzes across level ground to his defense positions (I know, I heard the music). In the meantime my poor Gerbiljaegers have to hike across Chip and Dale and several other small rodents, and in the end climb up a hillside that would make Julie Andrews proud, just to reach his positions. My dedicated troops have humped (NO, NOT LIKE THAT BAUHAUS!!!) their napalm tanks all this distance, and Barbarella has the gall, the impertinence to call me gamey when I finally have the chance to invite some of his troops to the marshmallow roast I casually threw right in the middle of his position... the ungrateful git.

Speaking of gits, the battle (should you wish to call it that) with Crawdad is coming along fine, although it's a bit like trying to herd cats. The little buggers (NO, NOT LIKE THAT BAUHAUS!!!) never seem to go in the direction you want them to. Still my armor is starting to squeegee his Frenchies off the map, much to the delight of the free world.

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To the last I grapple with thee; from hell's heart I stab at thee; for hate's sake I spit my last breath at thee...

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Originally posted by Phillies Phan:

Threads may come and threads may go but my everlasting love for my sweet Naomi lives on.

Phillies, as Knights of the cesspool we have certain standards to maintain!

With the tender moment you've just shared with us you threaten to raise these standards and we must ask you take the serenading elsewhere.

Mace (and don't forget to take those violin players of yours with you ON THE WAY OUT!!!)

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Originally posted by *Captain Foobar*:

Hello.

I am going to France.

I will be back on the 19th.

My battle with Roborat will end eventually.

S****, is this game ever going to end!! Or is it really some kind of never-ending purgatory, or a really weird outer limits episode??

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"With cat-like tread, Upon our prey we steal;

In silence dread, Our cautious way we feel." -G&S

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Originally posted by Berlichtingen:

Lorak!

Scribe thusly...

Seanachai (our very own head bobbin' doorman): Won... through various gamey tactics that would make the average grog retch

Berli: Lost

'Tis true. Berli might command all the smoke in Western Europe, but once again I display my ability to call down a blinding curtain of angel's feathers. Scribe it thusly, Lorak most Loathed and Acknowledged: Berli, once again royally screwed out of a victory, Seanachai staring about, smiling, like a puzzled lamb gamboling before his Maker. The score and other aspects are of no importance (mind, I'm engraving them on my treasured book of memories), as Berli, recognizing the need to once again grit his teeth, cry foul on the Powers That Be, and curse the Universe as a place where the worst jokes always happen to the best people, caved rather than use his still significant infantry strength to try and rectify what was easily one of the most miracle engendering armour shoot-outs in recent memory. Berli is advised to stick to using the Germans in future games, so that the Righteous Powers of the Universe don't have to continue to grant victories to Evil Nazis.

------------------

Tremble, tyrants and you perfidious opprobrium of all the parties,

Tremblez! your parricidal projects finally will receive their prices!

But these sanguinary despots, But these accomplices of Berli,

All these tigers which, without pity, Bauhaus the centre of their mother!

We will enter the career When our elder is not there any more,

We will find there their dust And the trace of their virtues

[This message has been edited by Seanachai (edited 03-13-2001).]

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Sorry I thought that calling a person a real thing was okay. There are such things you know, they are used to pulg "it" up when an incontinent person are given an enema. I thought it would be funny to say that Hamsters was one, since it would be a rather nasty job. I am really very sorry if I have offened anyone with my referance to the human body. I thought we were all old enough to handle it. I will monitor myself as if I am talking to my 10-12 year old group. I swear I utter word that is an body part and they giggle and snicker for hours. But, that is what you get when you have a bunch 10-12 year old drug users. They are just not all there, drugs that young will do big time damage to your brain. Of course, thier parents were high and they also dropped them on thier head alot. Is there a connection here? You make the call. I still think it is no excuse for Meeks though. I still have not got a turn from you, you pig loving son of a basset hound!

Armornut

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Originally posted by DekeFentle:

I suppose I should be taken to task for leaving out the “h”

Not by me, Lad. Any insult offered to that knee-walking turkey of the school of 'indimidation/threat/demand begging' is fine.

Originally posted by DekeFentle Whuppin’ boy of the thread…

Out of state?! Shut your mouth! I am a denizen of the great city of Shoreview the true axis upon which the Twin Cities turn.

I didn't say 'Out of State', you cretin, I said 'Outstate'. There's a difference, although to your average dull, vague, pabst-swilling inhabitant of someplace like Rochester, or Alexandria, I suppose being accused of being from the more remote parts of Minnesota don't seem any worse than being accused of...here, that doesn't wash. Being from 'Outstate' Minnesota is so far superiour to being from 'Out of State', that the differences between a loathsome slug like yourself, and Myself, must disappear into insignificance when we consider how many Out of State swine...ahem. Yes, anyway, where was I...

Shoreview?! And I've been exchanging posts with you?! Ewwwww. I feel like I've put my tongue into the mouth of a marsupial (and not one of your attractive, enticing marsupials, either. Which are they? Ask Mace or Stuka, they apparently keep lists; I don't want to know why). Still, I suppose it could be worse. You could have been from the Western Suburbs, rather than from the 'Rich Rednecks' Northern St. Paul suburbs.

Giving credit where it is due, I must, despite the inadequacies delineated above, note that Seanachia’s post did make for a decent read and even precipitated my glancing over Germanboy’s shoulder at the ever open dictionary he holds. In that vein and in order to kill two hollow boned flyers with one piece of basalt, I put forth a most gracious and magnanimous offer. Seanachia name a tavern within the downtown Murderapolis area (closer to the river is better from me), set the time (minimum of one weeks notice, Mon-Fri, lunch or after work consumption) and I will stand you to hors ovaries and beverages of your choice. The Brooklyn Center boy is also invited as I respect any member of the township that spawned the awe inspiring political career of Jesse. I ask only the following conditions…

A) Bath the morning of said meeting.

B) Arrive sans drive-through headset and paper hat.

C) Do not regurgitate at the table.

After having met me you can return here and posture in your normal apologetic manner with regards to my person.

Well, now. That's a strangely fair offer. I've wanted to see if Shandorf is as deeply disturbing and gamey a bastard as his posts/game play seem to indicate. And I've never actually met a fully evolved St. Paulite (mind, the only thing from keeping you being another 'hell, they don't plow the streets and even Jesse Ventura's sobered up briefly enough to notice the street system is complete ****e' is the fact that you play CM). So, I figure either Brits Pub, or Kierans, or we could go for dead ugly and meet someplace like the Half-Time Rec, but of course, that would disqualify North Mpls Suburb Boy. Best bet is the Downtown, Minneapolis area, where you suburbanites will depend on native guides to keep you from harm. Pity Chrisl can't join us. His understanding and past is in the right place, although he's sold out his future to sit teetering on the edge of a faultline, taking a pull from the Lotus of Impermanence, and contributing to power outages in a State that's over-populated and over-extended itself faster than a rat colony by a landfill.

All that said, and in regards to your terms:

A)I bathe every morning, every day of the year (and I am not a bloody squarehead, but I am a Minnesotan).

B) I cannot be accused of, nor even make head or tail of your point B.

C) I will do my best.

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Tremble, tyrants and you perfidious opprobrium of all the parties,

Tremblez! your parricidal projects finally will receive their prices!

But these sanguinary despots, But these accomplices of Berli,

All these tigers which, without pity, Bauhaus the centre of their mother!

We will enter the career When our elder is not there any more,

We will find there their dust And the trace of their virtues

[This message has been edited by Seanachai (edited 03-13-2001).]

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Originally posted by Roborat:

S****, is this game ever going to end!! Or is it really some kind of never-ending purgatory, or a really weird outer limits episode??

Stop whining. Goanna and I've been playing a game since before Christ was a corporal. I think we began it during the Second Incarnation of the Thread. Certainly not later than the Third Incarnation. It's a sign of Peng Challenge Thread maturation that you end up in hideous, never-ending games that take so long to play that you end up toasting the victory at the wedding where your son marries Peng's eldest daughter.

------------------

Tremble, tyrants and you perfidious opprobrium of all the parties,

Tremblez! your parricidal projects finally will receive their prices!

But these sanguinary despots, But these accomplices of Berli,

All these tigers which, without pity, Bauhaus the centre of their mother!

We will enter the career When our elder is not there any more,

We will find there their dust And the trace of their virtues

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