Yeknodathon

Well done, Missus Matt (primary birthing unit) and Mister Matt (secondary birthing unit)!! Two more lil' Croda's to bolster the BTS Army in coming months, eh?? I like the choice of Brian, especially since they named a world famous moofie after 'im! May both you and your newly extended family have good luck and good fortune in the coming years. God knows I need it!!! [For Matt's eyes only - PSST: Oi!! Take whatever time you need to owe me turn #68 of Kent Manor. If I get it within the next 6 months, I'll count that as a bonus!!..] "Coochie, coochie-coo...." AJ</font>

Or the ability to change goals during the game. Maybe once the tolerance points JasonC suggests have been reached, for example, the VC would change to encourage retreats off the map? Perhaps the best way to judge victory is not a 100 point ratio of winner:loser, but to have each side judged out of 100 solely on its own performance? Or keep the standard 100 point ration winner:loser, but also have each side rated on force conservation with a seperate multiplier? So your AAR would look like, in a case where the Germans attacked, inflicted casualties but also took some, and the Russian opted to retreat off the map rather than suffer any more: Final Score: German 65 Russian 33 German Victory Force Conservation: German 22 Russian 84 Weighted Score: German 14.3 Russian 27.72 The "final score" would judge only tactics, the "weighted score" would judge force conservation and realistic play.</font>

Just to throw in a few more ideas (I've no doubt that they are unrealistic to code for CM:BB): How about adding tactical "goals" during a game? Usual points for flags and losses to calculate who wins the game. Then at a certain point (based on player choice, scenario design, changes to morale, whatever) other "goal conditions" are introduced (appearance of exit zones for retreat, points modifiers to units destroyed or preserved or freed after capture). I'm not suggesting that the second level of "goals" should affect the outcome of the game based on the original victory conditions (players can ignore the goals if they wish), but what this might do is add more interest to end-games and provide an incentive to use tactics to manage retreats and pursuits rather than conduct last man stands. Nice to have a goal report within the context of the end-game victory report. Sort of introduces more fluidity onto the battlefield as priorties change and adds more possibilities to scenario design. Perhaps this is all "beyond the scope of CM" - hope not, I think it would add value to the game and enhance tactical play. Yeknod

Joe Joe Joe Joe... anarchy... floppy ears... Oh, dear, oh deary me... this must be Joe-Joe Binks Two of 'em twice Joe-Joe Joe-Joe... exponential spawning *sigh*.. multiple quires abandoned, *sigh, sigh*... exit zone chaos, quire record-keeping *sigh* missing or inaccurate... *sigh*... I shall make a note with me thickest crayon: Joe-Joe Joe-Joe - slack, needs monitoring. Yeknod o' tha Thistle

Joe Joe Joe Joe... anarchy... floppy ears... Oh, dear, oh deary me... this must be Joe-Joe Binks Two of 'em twice Joe-Joe Joe-Joe... exponential spawning *sigh*.. multiple quires abandoned, *sigh, sigh*... exit zone chaos, quire record-keeping *sigh* missing or inaccurate... *sigh*... I shall make a note with me thickest crayon: Joe-Joe Joe-Joe - slack, needs monitoring. Yeknod o' tha Thistle

Two Joes. Two Joes. Twins. Clones. Joes replicating. This seems important but I've become too desperate to think. Abysmal. Yeknod o' tha Thistle

First your attempts at German, and now this. Is there any bloody language or accent you can make an actual stab at? I call for a Peng Challenge Thread vote: Should AussieJeff be enjoined against any and all further attempts at posting in any parody of another accent, dialect, language, or patois other than his own native Australian? Vote now. Vote: No More AussieJeff attempts at posting outside Aussie. Vote for the good of all mankind.</font>

He gets it, it's just that it expires on contact. Does it sing? It doesn't look like the singing sort... Pathetic. Yeknod o' tha Thistle

Julie, Julie! Dearest, loveliest, smoochums... hold me Julie,... Look, look she's wearing her favourite twig in her hair... I can smell her she's so near... oh, me Lady, yer tease me... oh... look, see how her dress touches me knee, see how she smiles and thrusts her hands against her taut body as her dandelions spill over her hips..... owhhhawwwwwww gawwwwwwwd.... oh, Julie, Julie Oh, but what's this? Another beauty! A more delicate, winsome and flighty little bit of totty! Oh, they must be related, I must get to know this little minx that skips and twirls and excites me senses! I shall call this one - errrrr, Julie Redux. But which one to choose?! Which one will capture me heart and shower me with dainty puckerings and toyful smacks on me rump? Which one will gaze into me lobes and scratch me stomach? Bother - errrr, they shall have to compete for me affections... yes, they will have to show their worth... in a wrestling match... smoothered in baked beans or somefink... yes, yes and they shall sing, sing me favourite songs as they grapple and grasp each other... all desperate to win me... *sigh*... ...oh, I'm all het up and flustered with one of me twinges... *sigh*... where the heck's Seany-babe? I want to make some comparisons regarding parameters and such... Yeknod o' tha Thistle

My services are at your command (grovel, creep). Bovington still on? Let me know, may be able to help. Yeknod

Challenge, laddie, where's yer challenge? Pick one out and make a challenge, play a game, write about it, refuse to send turns, lose badly, nurse yer hatreds, and show occasional brilliance to entertain and embarrass. Clarification, rules, formulae? Profanity penetration tables, perhaps? Come now, The_Capt, we understand, really we do, tell us about yer little groggy dreams? *snicker* *snicker* Yeknod o' tha Thistle

Dear Peng, One would normally have to travel all the way back to Grade 3 class to be this naughty. Spanky bottoms and more joindy-up writing lessons. Yeknod o' tha Thistle [ May 26, 2002, 03:00 AM: Message edited by: Yeknodathon ]

And this, boys and girls, is an example of what happens when The_Capt stays out at sea too long - he develops more than the usual level of problems determining the differences between MEN and WOMEN> Sad, really. Steve</font>

Donkey in support... from me Rogered and Hummerstunned song book one of me favourites... *sniff* ... a Julie song. *sigh* ... well, I like to imagine Lars toiling up the slopes, lungs burning to greet every spare molecule of oxygen that drifts his way, followed close by a ton of prime, rampant Donkey in support singing along with effortless gait and a keen eye for free-fall descents... Climb ev'ry mountain Search high and low Follow every byway Every path is slow. Climb ev'ry mountain Ford every stream Follow every rainbow Till you find your doom. A doom that will need All the hate you can give Every day of your life For as long as you live. Climb ev'ry mountain Ford every stream Follow every rainbow Till you find your doom A doom that will need All the hate you can give Every day of your life For as long as you need Climb ev'ry mountain Ford every stream Follow every rainbow Till... you... find... your...doom! Yeknod o' tha Thistle

Oh, a fan. Please conduct unbounded adoration in reverential silence... any thrown underwear will not be returned... no autographs or wanton touching. Yeknod 'o tha Thistle

You forgot the earless, legless, sightless dog that he's dragging along the pavement on a little black leather leash...</font>

[something grey and heavy stirs in the darkest part of the paddock. An ear can be seen to waggle as it considers the merits of bed-baths] Yeknod o' tha Thistle

Oh, a letter from the Sunny Wastelands Secure Retirement Home: Dear Auntie Yeknod, Just a little note to say that our new accommodation is very nice. We’ve been made to feel very welcome and I’m enjoying all the attention offered by these fine nurses, doctors and armed guards. They give me a little shove up the stepladders when I retire to bed, follow me around when I wander up to the electrified perimeter fence and devise all sorts of fun daytime exercises to keep me trim. I do look forward to the rough bed-bath frolics. My, those female nurses are so physical and it takes three of ‘em to hold me down as I thrash around. I’m particularly fond of Frau Schuckelfister, the one with the developed muscle tone and bushy moustache. After the frisky ablutions, it’s the excitement of watching her fulsome body as she bends over and forcibly stuffs porridge into me expectant mouth. Peng is in a locked room. We’re not allowed to see him but I can hear fretful groans during his bed bath. Berli has been tranquillised following a rather disagreeable incident with the chaplain over a small point of theology and a bucket of holy water. I don’t think he’s going to get his hot chocolate drink tonight. Anyway, just a reminder to look after me possessions. Almost forgot, don’t open the locked desk draw, the one labelled: All Powerful Peng Objects of Extreme Desire – Keep Out. As artist to fellow artist, I know I can trust you, Yeky-chops, above the uneducated, low-life, scavenging rabble I’ve left behind. Seany-babe

*Disclaimer: This was not created by Persephone Persephone</font>

Err. The reference of the Knighting of AussieJeff sort of tells me it is Berli who is represented there. Maybe. Noba.</font>

No chance of .50 cal kill when this baby is hull-down. Yeknod

Ladies and gentlemen, everything is okay - I'm in charge now. My first action is to declare the open wearing of culottes to be a capital crime - anyone caught wearing silly long shorts of any type will spend a night in The Box. More to follow. House Persiflage sends</font>

Me Lady, favoritism {shiver, gack: American spelling, but I'll try anything to feel worse} and the Jusitcar go together like missing exit zones and first turn losses or donkeys and HATRED. Me Lady, he's doing things by Harv measures. Yeknod o' tha Thistle [ May 18, 2002, 12:56 AM: Message edited by: Yeknodathon ]

There's a wheat field in the desert... desperate. Yeknod o' tha Thistle

No, no a bullet is too quick and requires a steady aim... slow scratching of the scalp, in a circular pattern rotating one way and then the other and with each orbit further probing and boring of the soft pate's interior, is far more entertaining. In me own little way I shall selflessly contribute esoteric reflections... and sprinkle half-nibbled cheetos into the procedure to deepen the furrows. Yeknod 'o tha Thistle [ May 16, 2002, 01:26 AM: Message edited by: Yeknodathon ]