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Guess it's time to start a new Peng Challenge thread


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Or Boo, who's the most senior of my Squires, and a sort of unofficial deputy.

I'm related to Boo Radley? Dear me. I feel the need to go scrub myself with bleach.

In celebration of this . . . . discovery . . . I challenge thee, Boo Radley, as Cain to your Abel, to a beatdown. Let's do this old school, you putrid accumulation of filth covered entrails. CMBB or CMAK, something entertaining (and, in fairness, though I don't know why you deserve it), nothing from Ker Dessel.

Puking abominations. I don't know why you deserve such attention. Better just to get straight to the filicide you so richly deserve, but, you know how Seanachai feels about these things.

Steve

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How dense can you guys be? I'll take "What's way more dense than a neutron star" for $200, Alex.

I am not Seanachai's Squire. I am NOT related to you in any way, Mr. Speakeasy, other than I'm a mammal and you're close. Sort of. Just a couple links down the food chain.

And as for being a thuggish henchman, I off-shored that job years ago. Now it's handled by a guy in Bangalore with the unlikely name of "Chad".

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and a hearty SOD OFF!! to you too.....

See? It's because of this kind of attitude that nobody likes you.

That and your pungent, bodily funk.

Well, your attitude and pungent, bodily funk and annoying habits.

Your attitude and pungent, bodily funk and annoying habits and your complete lack of style.

And your high, screechy voice.

Your high screechy voice, attitude and pungent, bodily funk and annoying habits and your complete lack of style.

And your unbelievable, thick-headed stupidity.

So... nobody likes you because of your attitude and pungent, bodily funk and annoying habits and complete lack of style, high screechy voice and unbelievable, thick-headed stupidity.

But other than that...

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So, I did not die in a Southern swamp... this has left me rather at loose ends. I never anticipated having to deal with February, if things had panned out as I'd thought. A friend of mine once told me, long ago: Never make a life decision in February.

...

Maybe I'll have to go get further medical tests. Or write more stories of Small Friends. Or explain to Boo that, no matter what he might think, he is mine. There are times when I despair of Boo's ability to sort out the various ramifications of "An Olde One of the Peng Challenge Thread". There are the rules that are, and there are the Rules We Make.

Who's up for a jolly singsong, then, eh?

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It worries me that I'm on the path to having lived a long, long time, like Emrys.

But then, I consider that I have my Small Friends, my amazing grasp of language, storytelling and erudition, and I am reassured.

Mind, I'm pretty sure Emrys is fecking erudite. He might even be able to tell a good story. But, all things considered, I think I'm pretty safe.

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Christ knows I'm almost unbelievably smarter and more entertaining than the rest of you.

That's hubris, that is, but totally deserved. You lot are like guinea pigs that have gotten out of their cages and are wandering around the lawn, waiting for the neighbourhood cats to show up. All wrinkly noses, vacuous looks and nibbling.

I'm an Olde One of the Peng Challenge Thread. I'm never going to spend the afterlife counting the pellets I laid down on the grass.

Well, not out loud. And I won't need to use all four paws.

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That's got to be the worst Haiku I've ever read.

not possible .it won me the Critic(al) Award in the IV Cockney HAiku Slam in London last year . The winner Haiku , created by 10 old boy from Lewisham , follows : " Bush and Blair are gonna burn forever in hell sodomised in steamy room full of dwarfs, texans and sorrow " .

As you see , it was pretty tight competition...

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I'm an Olde One of the Peng Challenge Thread etc...

old story long forgotten. move on. or adapt . nostalgia maybe was cool in 40's , but hardly anymore.

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