What if WWII were _exactly_ like CMBO?

[Michael Emrys]

Originally posted by mike8g:

1. Flak trucks would never have seen action as they never went beyond the stage of quality control.

On the contrary, once Hitler discovered their invincibility he would have ordered entire divisions to be created armed with them.

Michael

[Frunze]

No surprise attacks. Both sides always knew when there was going to be a battle, even if they didn't know all the details.

No need to post sentries, guard supply convoys, or man continuous fronts, as battles only happened by agreement between commanders of the two sides. Soldiers slept soundly in comfortable beds, only heading out to the battlefield when they were needed.

All soldiers of a platoon were equally fast, tough, and accurate with their weapons - or equally slow, wimpy, and inaccurate. Individual members of a squad never ran away in fear unless the whole squad did.

Officers almost always led from behind, unless the overall commander was incompetent. If, by some chance, an officer was the first one over the top, this was not any special inspiration to the troops. I'm not sure how different this was from the conventional history of WWII.

The civilian population of all towns, villages, and farms was completely evacuated before any fighting.

A severe shortage of company and battallion-level commanding officers led to the invention of a computerized commander by Alan Turing. One of these machines was captured by the Germans, who reverse-engineered it and mass-produced their own "artificial intelligences." However, this electronic tactician was far less skilled than a human officer, and was hated by the troops because it got so many men killed with its stupid orders. They said that "AI" stood for "artificial idiot."

[mikeadams]

If WWII were like CMBB: unit commanders could magically fly over the battlefield

[Breakthrough]

Painfully aware that their tank arsenal is obsolete, the Japanese Miltary Attache to the Third Reich calls on the Henschel factory to place an order for King Tigers at 278 points each. The Henschel salesman remarks, "Ve do not get many Japanese Military Attaches here mein herr". The attache responds, "Ah, so, and at these prices you are not likely to see many more" :eek:

[Tarquelne]

The attache responds, "Ah, so, and at these prices you are not likely to see many more" :eek: [/QB]

Thank you for the :eek: to rub in the punchline, it wouldn't have been nearly so painful without it. Too bad you can't to a rim-shot with a smilie.

[ August 22, 2002, 04:48 PM: Message edited by: Tarqulene ]

[Sergei]

After Germans lost the war, a large underground revisionist movement would have formed, claiming they would have won "if zust die Optik weer modeled! :mad: Heil BTS oder Zumfink!"

[Lars]

About halfway through the Ardennes, Pieper's hard drive would crash.

[Redwolf]

Like the German discover in 1941 that the 88mm FlaK gun was great against armor, the 3" mortars become the main British antitank weapon.

After leading the Germans to apply this thickest armor at the top of the tanks (although no direct shot can ever hit it), the British go on to develop a 3" mortar hollow charge round.

For the next centuries, civilian sharpshooting competitions are no longer carried out with inefficient rifles and vetical targets, instead, 2" mortars and convertibles populate sporting areas.

[Moriarty]

It is with great regret that I report the Allies would have lost had I been in command.

[-E]

Originally posted by mike8g:

2. The most used question by photo intelligence officers (when analysing pics of enemy troops) would have been: "What grass are they using ?"

Game, Set and Match! (ROFLMAO!)

[Chad Harrison]

No one would ever surrender, unless their entire battalion had been slaughtered down to the last few men. Instead of surrendering at the onset of Barbossa, encircled Russian troops would run around in cirlces, flapping their arms like chickens, waiting to be shot dead by the Germans.

Chad