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I tried to challenge Peng, but all I got was an indecent proposal...


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Not that there is anything wrong with THAT...

Ok, now GO AWAY.

I'm serious. Get away from here you creep. Maybe you're thinking "I'll just stop by and say hello" ...well dont. Consider yourself not wanted.

Have you ever walked in the desert? Have you ever walked for miles and miles under the unforgiving sun? Without water, without shelter or shadow? Have you? As you can imagine, it's not really that fun. Have you tried it wearing black clothes? Thats even less fun. Now imagine walking in the sun for miles and miles, for hours and hours, wearing black clothes, without water. Your sweating, your thirsty, so very thirsty. Your mouth feels like sandpaper, your tounge feels like a dead gerbil. And its warm. And your really sick and tired of the heat and the sun and the sand. And it feels like you have a dead rat in your mouth.

Now imagine seeing someone in the distance. You gaze towards the figure wondering, hoping, praying that it is someone who has some water for you to drink. The person walks up to you and says

Hey man, are you thirsty? You sure look thirsty...do you want some water?

yes... please you whisper with a weak voice...trembling at the thought of some cold fresh water.

Well, I dont have any water, but you can have as much salt as you want says the man and holds out his hand filled with shining white salt.

You are about as wanted here in this MBT as that fistful of salt. So take a hint and SOD OFF.

If you decide to stick around, despite our best efforts to make you leave, you might consider challenging someone.

Challenge someone like yourself, some lowlife, scum sucking newbie (SSN) who wants to get a thrill by actually posting on the MBT.

Do NOT challenge ME or any of the Knights of the CessPool, we will laugh at you ... actually we'll laugh at you anyway but you won't get a game so don't try. We MIGHT sic a Squire on you for our amusement and if so you should ... well, amuse us!

Sound off as if you have a pair, none of this mamby pamby, mother may I, golly fellows what a swell lot of chaps you have here may I join then CRAP. In doing so, however, do not sound off ABOUT your pair. Leave your personal hang ups, political, sexual, racial and so forth for the General Discussion forum because we don't care. Just good old fashioned personal attacks...

Be EXTEMEMLY NICE to the the Ladies of the CessPool or you'll incur our wrath and get sent to Coventry and never be mentioned again.

Show some respect for those who have MADE it here since you have NOT and likely enough never will.

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Originally posted by jdmorse:

*Inadvertenly stumbles in*

Kids. We build a world and this is what they do with it.

*contined mumbling into the night*

Waddaya know about that? The founder, nay, the Projenitor of the noble house of which I am a member actually wandered in.

You know, he and I are so close...eh, I'm lying. The man never speaks to me. I offer to simonize his head, I get nothing. I blame Croda. But then, I pretty much blame him for everything.

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Originally posted by Boo_Radley:

Waddaya know about that? The founder, nay, the Projenitor of the noble house of which I am a member actually wandered in.

You know, he and I are so close...eh, I'm lying. The man never speaks to me. I offer to simonize his head, I get nothing. I blame Croda. But then, I pretty much blame him for everything.

It was a one night stand. Don't remeber nuthin 'bout it. Least wise they never got me on the child support. So this is where my little "indiscretion" leads? I demand a DNA test. If not then I shall box your bovine ears back like the billious pock of pus that is your forefather.

By the way, you might wish to research our family tree a bit more. Back then, young and fair, Croda, he of claimed descent tasted of Helen's fair bloom admidst the ruins of Priams loge, developed a rather unhealthy yen for his mum and a bit of the old knocky knock against his pa. So no telling where ye came from.

Well the test is in the pudding. Let us see if you carry my lineage boy. Pick a side. Challenged (in more ways than one) are you. If a rheumny old reprobate can sliver you down to your nads, then we'll know where you belong. Skinny assed punk marker. Fey!

[ May 08, 2003, 01:36 AM: Message edited by: jdmorse ]

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Originally posted by Boo_Radley:

I offer to simonize his head, I get nothing.

[standing, weary, this last statement is considered with great solemnity and physical effort]

*sniff* better make a note of that... Boo, hairdressing services for free, obviously good with perms and blue rinses, must remember tip for conversation.

*sniff* fancy a different grey tint...

Yeknod

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Originally posted by Monty:

Any other funny stories ??

Funny stories?

How about Operation Market Garden...I bet the Germans got a chuckle out of that plan of yours.

Btw, you're dead...haven't you got some decomposing to do or something?

Mace

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So this is the infamous MBT!

I can only assume that the smell in here comes from the dying carcasses of those left behind.

Those who felt at one time that this place was the cool place to hang.

I can only assume, they got so fed up with waiting for someone to say something meaningful, that they eventually forgot to eat or drink and just curled up and died from the sheer monontony of it all.

BTW was their ever really a PENG!!

Or was he like everything else in here, a figmant of your imaginations?

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Originally posted by DUNDROY:

So this is the infamous MBT!

I can only assume that the smell in here comes from the dying carcasses of those left behind.

Those who felt at one time that this place was the cool place to hang.

I can only assume, they got so fed up with waiting for someone to say something meaningful, that they eventually forgot to eat or drink and just curled up and died from the sheer monontony of it all.

BTW was their ever really a PENG!!

Or was he like everything else in here, a figmant of your imaginations?

Let's see...

E-mail, yep.

English (maybe)...

Pillock, Yep.

Worthless, yep.

Innovative, nope.

Spelling, nope.

Ignore it.

It will go away.

Noba.

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Originally posted by jdmorse:

Well the test is in the pudding. Let us see if you carry my lineage boy. Pick a side. Challenged (in more ways than one) are you. If a rheumny old reprobate can sliver you down to your nads, then we'll know where you belong. Skinny assed punk marker. Fey!

And as jdmorse's very credible "Yoda on mescaline" impersonation winds down to a pathetic mewl, we ask ourselves these questions:

Is it true that he used to dance in a flea circus?

Is it true that he washes his hair in clam broth?

Do we really want the image of him "dandling" Croda on his knee seered into our brain?

Just how would Eggnoggathon look in dreadlocks?

If you know the answers to these, of any other questions, please call Joe immediately. His phone number is in the back stall, directly under "For an adequate time, call:".

OK, Grandpappy, you'll get your set-up in a day or so. Better put a chin strap on your toupee, though. It promises to be a bumpy ride.

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Originally posted by DUNDROY:

So this is the infamous MBT!

I can only assume

I can only assume

Well my good dungboy, you have placed the staggering total of 5 posts so far in your impressive rise. When you get to 10 posts mayhaps you would be willing to give BFC some pointers on how to sell computer games?

From your own statement I see that any form of logical thinking is beyond your pathetic abilities. Therefore:

I can only assume that you are a lackwitted, festering, puss-filled, phlegm choked, piece of carrion that has somehow found it's unfortunate way to this Thread of Your Worst Nightmare.

Did I say welcome?

NO

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Originally posted by Jim Boggs:

Well my good dungboy, you have placed the staggering total of 5 posts so far in your impressive rise. When you get to 10 posts mayhaps you would be willing to give BFC some pointers on how to sell computer games?

From your own statement I see that any form of logical thinking is beyond your pathetic abilities. Therefore:

I can only assume that you are a lackwitted, festering, puss-filled, phlegm choked, piece of carrion that has somehow found it's unfortunate way to this Thread of Your Worst Nightmare.

Did I say welcome?

NO

Not since I was in the playground have I had the pleasure of reading such meaningful words. They were usually scrawled across the walls in the loo by some half wit or other who would reach into his grubby little satchel and produce a can of silver spray paint. No doubt a present from his parents for being such an incessant twit.

Hell I almost felt myself shouting "I'm going to tell the teacher" nasty man please go away.

The fumes from your pathetic rant do nothing for my phlegm problem.

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Originally posted by DUNDROY:

BTW was their ever really a PENG!!

Or was he like everything else in here, a figmant of your imaginations?

Yes Virginia (or virgin, which is probably more likely, not that there is anything wrong with that, provided you're female and I can buy you a drink, have a pink squirrel?), there is a Peng.

SSN Hint Of The Day: Make jokes about terrorist at the boarding gate.

Now sod off.

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You take the good with the bad it seems. On the good side we have a member of the Shavian House taking the initiative and posting a damned fine set of rules if I do say so myself. Also on the good side we have the return of jd ... well MOSTLY good I suppose.

On the bad we still have that pesky SSN infiltration problem, can't we spray for them or something?

Joe

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Originally posted by Lars;

Yes Virginia (or virgin, which is probably more likely, not that there is anything wrong with that, provided you're female and I can buy you a drink, have a pink squirrel?), there is a Peng.

What's with all the infantile name calling stuff.

Is it a rule of Peng?

I checked out your link, which to say the least is about as current as your chance of buying any female a drink never mind a virginal one.

Anyone who lists hunting, fishing and drinking as their interests must be about as popular with the ladies as a down and out pisshead sitting by the sidewalk on a sunny day.

Guess that explains the smell in here though.

BTW thanks for the link and the pink squirrel. Not much use though, as both are dated and about as useful as a Peng thread without a Peng.

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Originally posted by MrSpkr:

I smell a poseur.

Perhaps I should shower this week?

Steve

Yeah, a bit too new to the game to be wandering into the MBT with malice aforethought ... how would it know that we're "infamous" with only eight posts?

I say we see if it weighs as much as a duck and take it from there.

Joe

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