I Started A New Peng Thread And All I got Was This Lousy Hunk Of Cess.....

[Hamsters]

And you think we're weird. We don't speak German but we think they're saying, 'All your bases are belong to us.'

New. Better.

[This message has been edited by Hamsters (edited 03-07-2001).]

[Mace]

Originally posted by Priest:

Lufty oh Lufty....here Lufty Lufty Lufty...come here you disgrace to all menkind!!!!

Note: I do not know Kitty or Mary. I have never met either of them. The point is that stupidity in its rawest form (racism,sexicm, etc.) is my greatest annoyance and you just became the focus of the anger it causes me pal!

Nah, preemptive strikes always work better!

Besides you're assuming that this *AHEM* *COUGH* *SPLUTTER* gentleman has the necessary intelligence to actually comprehend the written word!

Mace

Hey Luftwaffe, if you can read and are reading this - why don't you post to Croda's Cess....we aren't inhibited by posting rules there and I for one am looking forward to having a few words with you (but I do promise that they will be little words so that you can understand them)

[DekeFentle]

Mace, Squire?!

Aren't you a squire? Everyone treats you like one. Where are the scrolls? Who keeps track of those damn things anyway? I have the list somewhere... Right here it is, yep Mace your're a kinigget, so you're saying I need to play someone with less rank than you? Who would that be? Somebody named "pond scum" whom I have yet to meet? I owe you an apoligy (not that you'll ever get it) I truely thought you were the lowest of the low in this pit of sewage swilling simpletons. Who pray tell rates under you?

Lorak

As you seem to be mentioned from time to time as the keeper of records. Perhaps you could point me in the direction of the chief neophyte in this collection of vapid amoeba. I would like to request a title. If court jester is not taken I will accept that as I have always admired the hat.

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Winning is why we play!

Just can't get the hang of these bold dohickys.

[This message has been edited by DekeFentle (edited 03-07-2001).]

[Herr Oberst]

Originally posted by DekeFentle:

Mace, Squire?!

Aren't you a squire? Everyone treats you like one. Where are the scrolls? Who keeps track of those damn things anyway? I have the list somewhere... Right here it is, yep Mace your're a kinigget, so you're saying I need to play someone with less rank than you? Who would that be? Somebody named "pond scum" whom I have yet to meet? I owe you an apoligy (not that you'll ever get it) I truely thought you were the lowest of the low in this pit of sewage swilling simpletons. Who pray tell rates under you?

Lorak

As you seem to be mentioned from time to time as the keeper of records. Perhaps you could point me in the direction of the chief neophyte in this collection of vapid amoeba. I would like to request a title. If court jester is not taken I will accept that as I have always admired the hat.

All right Poolers, can we please send DekeFentle home? This person is depriving some village of an idiot...

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To the last I grapple with thee; from hell's heart I stab at thee; for hate's sake I spit my last breath at thee...

[Herr Oberst]

Originally posted by jd:

WAR IS PEACE

FREEDOM IS SLAVERY

IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH

Egads, another one. We will have to watch monsieur jd for a while, or soon he'll be posting that Work will make you free or some such drivel...

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To the last I grapple with thee; from hell's heart I stab at thee; for hate's sake I spit my last breath at thee...

[Forever Babra]

Update:

Lawyer has finally deduced (duh) that I am evacuating my troops. He thinks that this is gamey and I am the gamiest of all gamey bastards. Now, did I complain when he sent me his no doubt carefully-chosen setup which gave me ONE tank and him a few platoons worth? Nooooo.... Did I complain that I got two spotters and he had at least six? Noooo.... I can't wait for the AAR (like THAT will ever happen) to see what the force balance really was. Y'all might wanna avoid this one folks. Bit of a crybaby if ya ask me.

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"Za Rodentia!"

[Seanachai]

I attempted to post this moments after the original post, but was told the forums were down while Madmatt and Kwazydog argued over what form of ritual sacrifice was most likely to result in extending bartimes without legal consequences.

originally posted by Priest

Lufty oh Lufty....here Lufty Lufty Lufty...come here you disgrace to all

menkind!!!!

Matt inadvertantly gave me permission to use a 100th of my average brain

power to school you on simple ethics and behavior on life not to mention

this board. And while Kitty has proven herself a valuable (and funny) asset

on this board you have quickly proven (in 7 posts I might add) that you have

no worth whatsoever. Next time either contibute constructively, post to the

PENG thread, or shutup and lurk like the heathen you are you backwards SOB.

Note: I do not know Kitty or Mary. I have never met either of them. The

point is that stupidity in its rawest form (racism,sexicm, etc.) is my

greatest annoyance and you just became the focus of the anger it causes me

pal!

Here, Priest, you fool, we don't want that idiot in here! He can take

himself off to Testosterone Island and post there by writing on the ground

with a stick. We do know Kitty, and aren't particularly interested

in lackwitted stalkers dragging their ignorance in here and waving it like a

flag just to annoy one of our esteemed members.

Yeesh, what next, will you be sending any other undesirables our way? We

don't have a large statue of Peng in the harbour, lad, with a plaque

reading: 'Send us your arrogant, your inane, your useless yearning to post

idiocy.' Those here who do so do it by choice, not because they're not

capable of anything else.

Now, gather up any objectionable toads you've herded in here, and boot them

back out into the Real World, with the hopes that Darwinism works more

quickly than usual, and frees us all of their presence before they are able

to breed.

Good Lord. This isn't a landfill for your rejects, it's the Peng Challenge

Thread, home to taunting, wit(at least on occassion), and the rather

loathsome camraderie of competition. Not: 'got something unbelievable

annoying, feeble, and stupid to say? Wander on over and say it in the Peng

Challenge Thread.'

While every vile thing you might want to say about 'Luftwaffe' is totally true and accurate, we're not the homeland for arseholes, despite what some of the lower intellects might claim. The Peng Challenge Thread is actually the Homeland of all that is best and brightest about Combat Mission. You just won't notice this opalescent quality on the day to day posts here. But take them in sum, consider all the sources, and you will find the hard, brilliant, and beautiful diamond in the rough of the Combat Mission forums.

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Tremble, tyrants and you perfidious opprobrium of all the parties,

Tremblez! your parricidal projects finally will receive their prices!

But these sanguinary despots, But these accomplices of Berli,

All these tigers which, without pity, Bauhaus the centre of their mother!

We will enter the career When our elder is not there any more,

We will find there their dust And the trace of their virtues

[This message has been edited by Seanachai (edited 03-08-2001).]

[Shandorf]

During one of my breaks ( I am weak) I sent back a few turns. Yaz damn right I am a nice guy!) and one of them happened to be to JD who's ass I am kicking pretty bad right now.

in one of his e-mails to me he hinted that this might be an assault. To say the least I was shocked at his accusation and I proved it to him by telling him everything I have or had that is... and now that toad doesn't send return files.

You better not be backing out you spineless bottom feeder. Our game is on the up and up. You are just losing. You remember losing don't you, JD? It is what you do everyday in court. Remember? Except this time after you lose there isn't any big fat paycheck from the sucker..er.. client you just screwed...err... represented. Got it? deal with it!

And Priest, you are barely tolerable when you DON'T bring friends. Get the hint?

Back to the books.

Die DBMS. Die.

Jeff

[Speedy]

I demand that Maces' Australian citizenship be revoked. We are having this wee fight over a nice little two pub village and what does he do? HE BLOWS UP THE PUB, it was only through sheer luck that everyone inside it all decided to go out the back for a piss at the same time that noone was hurt.

But seeing all that grog going to waste has left my men mentally scarred for life.

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Work is the curse of the drinking class.

I have nothing else to say. Ya, quote that you rat bastards.

-Meeks

[Egbert]

Originally posted by Shandorf:

You are just losing. You remember losing don't you, JD?

-------snip-----

Jeff

I'm all confused on this losing bit. Somehow I get the impression somebody here feels there is a better way. I mean really, it's alot easier, to watch all the explosions.

[chrisl]

Originally posted by Shandorf:

During one of my breaks ( I am weak) I sent back a few turns. Yaz damn right I am a nice guy!) and one of them happened to be to JD who's ass I am kicking pretty bad right now.

You better not be backing out you spineless bottom feeder. Our game is on the up and up. You are just losing. You remember losing don't you, JD?

Some bricks fell on his head or something in the earthquake. He's been hurling troop and tank into the Kondirator™ of my defense, and has been essentially wiped off the map twice so far in our op. And he's the attacker...It's caused him to fall into some sort of depressive funk (and not the Bootsy and George type) and blow all his games (go away Bauhaus, not like that).

Wait-- now I recall that he was actually losing well before the quake. Maybe he's just stopped playing exclusively against Hiram and Crawdad, and is being punished horribly for it.

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"If you can taste the difference between caviar on a cracker and ketchup on a Kit-Kat while blindfolded, you have not had enough aquavit to be ready for lutefisk." (stolen from some web page about lutefisk)

[Seanachai]

Originally posted by Egbert:

I'm all confused on this losing bit. Somehow I get the impression somebody here feels there is a better way. I mean really, it's alot easier, to watch all the explosions.

Your post, lad, is wonderfully...incoherent. But not in the way that Mensch or Meeks's(latest incarnation) posts are incoherent. Their posts are incoherent due to madness or mad intent. Your post is just...what the hell are you trying to say? Why have you posted here? Are you completely dim, or just lost? If you're lost, hurry-scurry back to the main Board before something worse happens to you. If you're completely dim, do the same. If you're...sorry, but I've exhausted the only possible explanations for what you've posted here. Hurry, hurry, back to the main Board, you've a very important date...

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Tremble, tyrants and you perfidious opprobrium of all the parties,

Tremblez! your parricidal projects finally will receive their prices!

But these sanguinary despots, But these accomplices of Berli,

All these tigers which, without pity, Bauhaus the centre of their mother!

We will enter the career When our elder is not there any more,

We will find there their dust And the trace of their virtues

[Naja]

As I said (in a much better thread) I would read this crap (yes this new thread is crap) except for DekeFentle who has clearly bested the lot of you in wit a verbose. Who are the court jesters? Taunt one of you... na you have proven the true master of this thread DekeFentle. I would dare say a match for "Peng" himself. All of you trembling in his shadow have exposed yourselves as truly "inadequate".......(squash)

[Shandorf]

Senile,

I demand to know when we will take up arms against one another again. For you see I have a lot of arms here in this pile. They come from Gerbilboy, JD, Berli, Croda, Hiram, The Dalem, ack! How did dalem arms get in this pile?! Dammit! It must be that infernal dog of his dragging my arms around and getting them all out of sort. After that poor pooch lost it's ears it has never been quite the same.

Anyway, where was I? Oh, yes! Senile! I relish battle with you once again. Why not we bring in the spring with some real good old fashion bloodshed. Whaddaya say, nanuck?

Send me a setup and if I recall it is YOUR TURN to attack. Do your worst.

Jeff

[Shandorf]

Originally posted by DekeFentle:

I would like to request a title. If court jester is not taken I will accept that as I have always admired the hat.

How about "Whuppin' boy"? Since Hiram left we have need of a good whuppin' boy, and besides Bauhaus gets lonely at night and needs someone to cuddle. You might do.. yep. You sure would, you're just about the riiiight height.

BTW, you asked for someone lower than Mace? Well, my club-footed mook, look no further than the squire of Stuka, or is it Joe shaw, or was it Mark IV??? Damn... You see? He is so insignificant I can't remember who even sponsored him. What was his name...? Hmmmm Aqua Vulva? No... that's not it.. Pedro the wetback? No. Aquila Penis? Damn.

Anyway, I am sure someone here will remember. Or if not.. Then you can always play the Dalem. Mind you, he sucks, but in a good way. Just try not to fall asleep playing him. That is his tactic ya know. He bores you into a semi comatose state, and even then he can't win.

Maybe after a while you can work your way up to Croda? It wouldn't take much but, hey, I don't know you from Adam.

Jeff

[Seanachai]

Originally posted by Berlichtingen:

Peng! Seanachai!

As the Elder Gods, I feel we must do something about this infestation of hamsters. Seanachai, your plot with the Brick™ failed miserably. The Pod Illuminati has failed multiple times in their assassination attempts. It is with much regret that I propose this final solution...

Consult the Book of Armaments!

Sorry, Berli, I've been trying to raise Peng (Genuflect, Saint Bauhaus!), but apparently he's sitting in the lotus position under the Bo tree somewhere, coming to grips with the concept of Meeks by contemplating the rotting state his body will assume after death.

As regards the Book of Armaments, I've done some tinkering with the Myxomatosis virus in an attempt to take the Saddam Hussein approach to Hamsters, but so far no success.

Oh, but someone should inform Dalem that Hamsters is the horror known as Meeks in its most raw and scurrying form.

As the Elder Gods, I suggest we try really nasty cave paintings and a unified posture of righteousness against Meeks until he shows the proper respect. The useless sod. Bar that, I suggest we coordinate a vacation trip to the southern hellhole where he makes his home, and we all put the boot in. A lot. Oh, and we bring flowers and a really nice gift to his purported girlfriend. She's suffered enough, and might appreciate a little attention from the Trinity, who understands her pain and despair.

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Tremble, tyrants and you perfidious opprobrium of all the parties,

Tremblez! your parricidal projects finally will receive their prices!

But these sanguinary despots, But these accomplices of Berli,

All these tigers which, without pity, Bauhaus the centre of their mother!

We will enter the career When our elder is not there any more,

We will find there their dust And the trace of their virtues

[This message has been edited by Seanachai (edited 03-08-2001).]

[jd]

Originally posted by Shandorf:

I am a nice guy!) and one of them happened to be to JD who's ass I am kicking pretty bad right now.....in one of his e-mails to me he hinted that this might be an assault. To say the least I was shocked at his accusation and I proved it to him by telling him everything I have or had that is... and now that toad doesn't send return files.

Yup no argument here. You are beating me on the up and up (gamey bastard) But I was blown away (along with many of my units at the discrepancy in what you get vs what my points allow, ie a Battalion+ vs a US Rifle company w/ hvy weapons platoon. 5 tanks/TD's vs 3, 6 FO's vs 2, 7 250's vs none. BTS do somefink. Maybe next time we switch he he.

You better not be backing out you spineless bottom feeder. Our game is on the up and up. You are just losing.

I am waiting for your next turn you sadist. To the bitter end.

You remember losing don't you, JD? It is what you do everyday in court. Remember? Except this time after you lose there isn't any big fat paycheck from the sucker..er.. client you just screwed...err... represented. Got it? deal with it!

You dip! That's why there are RETAINERS, paid UP FRONT!

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If frogs had uzi's, snakes woudn't mess with them so much. - Hiram

[Shandorf]

Originally posted by jd:

Yup no argument here. You are beating me on the up and up (gamey bastard) But I was blown away (along with many of my units at the discrepancy in what you get vs what my points allow, ie a Battalion+ vs a US Rifle company w/ hvy weapons platoon. 5 tanks/TD's vs 3, 6 FO's vs 2, 7 250's vs none. BTS do somefink. Maybe next time we switch he he

You should be blown away. I rock.

BTW I do get 1000 more points than you to attack with. Sheesh.. Do the math. you're the lawyer.

Jeff

[Priest]

Shansi you have a problem with me then that is fine. But in this case I did not invite this problem here. That was Matt so yell at him (boy I would pay to see that). Check your sources before you use second rate sayings with the intent in hurting my feelings. It will not work even if you have Lorak write the sayings for you!

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Sir are you sure you want to go to red alert...it would mean changing the bulb

-Kryton of Red Dwarf

[Stuka]

What the hell is going on here?

I leave the forum for a week to visit the hometown of Mace on business and the 'pool goes to hell. Newbies, wannabees, and jerkoffs in general are parading around our fine shores like roosters on speed.

Given this time off I have been cunningly devising evil tactics with the assistance of Macey, with whom I have downed considerable quantities of beer this fine evening. To those of you currently withering under the oppression of the Stuka of doom, beware! for it will only get worse, much worse.

A fly blown pox on the tourists.

Oh, and Mensch.

[Mace]

Originally posted by Seanachai:

we're not the homeland for arseholes

We let Stuka in didn't we?

Mace (Posted from some cheap cyber cafe in the middle of Melbourne while waiting for Stuke to deliver a blow to the right of the head in response to this here post...if he does though the jokes on him...he's walking back to Glen Waverly)!!!!

Muahahahahahahahaha

[Mace]

Originally posted by Speedy:

I demand that Maces' Australian citizenship be revoked. We are having this wee fight over a nice little two pub village and what does he do? HE BLOWS UP THE PUB, it was only through sheer luck that everyone inside it all decided to go out the back for a piss at the same time that noone was hurt.

But seeing all that grog going to waste has left my men mentally scarred for life.

What are you talking about man? The beer has been flowing quite nicely in Melbourne's heartland, or soon will be when Stuka and I locate the the next bar!

Mace

[Mace]

Originally posted by Naja:

As I said (in a much better thread) I would read this crap (yes this new thread is crap) except for DekeFentle who has clearly bested the lot of you in wit a verbose. Who are the court jesters? Taunt one of you... na you have proven the true master of this thread DekeFentle. I would dare say a match for "Peng" himself. All of you trembling in his shadow have exposed yourselves as truly "inadequate".......(squash)

Oh looky, DekeFentle's brought in a mate to back him up....nothing we aussies like than a bar room brawl....Stuka, you do the fighting, I'll nurse the drinks!

Mace

[This message has been edited by Mace (edited 03-08-2001).]

[Stuka]

Me? fight DerKinkyFerkle? Not bloody likely, hitting retards is downright gamey!

[Stuka]

Ahhh, the pleasure of being in a foreign city entirely at my employers expense.... A 4 1/2 star hotel, unlimited food and alcohol expense account and a fistfull of cab charge vouchers basically means that I now own this city.

Except for Mace, who is a free spirit that can never be owned. Although Kitty does have an small offer placed with Maces broker, it would appear that his reserve has not been met. A fistfull of wool is hardly deemed as satisfactory. 2 fistfulls maybe but one? Never!