Mark IV Posted August 21, 2000 Share Posted August 21, 2000 It CAN Happen Here: Why the AI Cheats in Combat Mission (Scene: A Weasel, hull-down in the azaleas outside a suburban home. A 1m dish is telescoped up on a mast, pointed directly toward the house. Cut to interior of Weasel: Steve and Charles, 3-day stubble of beard growth, beer cans and fast-food wrappers everywhere, wearing headphones, focused intently on Mac screens. An MP44 hangs on the wall.) Steve: Wait, I think I've got something. Charles: Yeah, he's booting it up now… Steve: Lookit! Chance Encounter versus the AI! This is gonna be great. Charles: It is SO gonna kick his butt! (Charles types furiously) Charles: OK, I got all his unit locations and I put an extra 250mm of frontal on the Shermans. Steve (evil grin): What about that 90 off the Pershing? (Charles types furiously) (Muffled, overheard from headphones): Boom-CLANG! (Muffled Voice): S**t! Charles (thumbs up): Yes! (Muffled, overheard from headphones): Boom-CLANG! (Muffled Voice): Awwww, CRAP!!! No way! Steve (thumbs up): JA! (Muffled, overheard from headphones): Boom-CLANG! (Muffled Voice): G*****M IT!!! No WAY am I gonna buy this piece of crap! There is NO WAY those units were spotted! I'm gonna tell all my friends not to buy it, either! Steve and Charles, in unison: Ex-cell-ENT! BWA-HA-HA-HA-HA!!! (They high-five, crack fresh beers, and toast one another. Sound of Weasel engine starting. Cut to external shot of Weasel with retracting antenna dish, trailing azaleas, turning onto suburban street). Steve (voice over): Hey, a guy in Missouri just downloaded the Gold Demo! (Weasel rolls up to Stop sign with turn signal on). (Fade). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Formerly Babra Posted August 21, 2000 Share Posted August 21, 2000 That's some scary damn imagery... (Damn, damn you...) ------------------ Sounds like 100% weapons-grade bolonium to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted August 21, 2000 Share Posted August 21, 2000 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Formerly Babra: That's some scary damn imagery... (Damn, damn you...) <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Laughing, laughing...I am in fact, laughing quite a bit here. ------------------ After witnessing exceptional bravery from his Celtic mercenaries, Alexander the Great called them to him and asked if there was anything they feared. They told him nothing, except that the sky might fall on their heads. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Mirage2k Posted August 21, 2000 Share Posted August 21, 2000 I actually hurt myself because I was laughing too hard at that. I'm not kidding. -Andrew ------------------ Throw me a frickin' smiley, people! Your one-stop-shop for gaming news is www.SiegersPost.com ! Hit it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest *Captain Foobar* Posted August 21, 2000 Share Posted August 21, 2000 I KNEW it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mace Posted August 21, 2000 Share Posted August 21, 2000 I hear they also interfere in PBEMs by overriding player's commands! That would explain it all. Mace Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grognerd_Fogman Posted August 21, 2000 Share Posted August 21, 2000 O My GOD!, that's why those little **** crews come outta nowhere to steal your turrets attention! ------------------ Thanks for Athskin! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Holdit Posted August 21, 2000 Share Posted August 21, 2000 Brilliant Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MichaelU Posted August 21, 2000 Share Posted August 21, 2000 Hey, put a warning on posts like that. My boss gets suspicious when I laugh out loud. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jager 7 Posted August 21, 2000 Share Posted August 21, 2000 Mark IV, Awesome. Now that the mystery is solved I wonder what effect this will have on the near constant whining that has infected this board lately??? Out here.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Noba Posted August 21, 2000 Share Posted August 21, 2000 HeHeHe....we're safe in Australia.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark IV Posted August 21, 2000 Author Share Posted August 21, 2000 I don't wish to be a wet blanket, but it would be nice to see fewer posts with "V1.04...Bug" in the header. There are things which occasionally defy immediate comprehension, and possibly even a bug here or there, but the first impression given to a new visitor (and prospective customer) is that there are bugs all over the place. Glitches and bugs should definitely be discussed, but "the first impression is a lasting one" and this is the most bug-free game I own. Maybe these things should be posted on one of the other CM fora? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IntelWeenie Posted August 21, 2000 Share Posted August 21, 2000 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Noba: HeHeHe....we're safe in Australia....<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Oh, yea? Weasels are amphibious, you know! ------------------ "Belly to belly and everything's better" - Russian proverb Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Germanboy Posted August 21, 2000 Share Posted August 21, 2000 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Mark IV: I don't wish to be a wet blanket, but it would be nice to see fewer posts with "V1.04...Bug" in the header. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Hear hear Mark IV. ------------------ Andreas Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dumbo Posted August 21, 2000 Share Posted August 21, 2000 Hmm this would explain why last night after the AI beat me I SWEAR one of the enemy units have me the finger. _dumbo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Noba Posted August 22, 2000 Share Posted August 22, 2000 ------------------------------------------ Oh, yea? Weasels are amphibious, you know! ------------------------------------------ Must be time to put the game on a laptop in my car then..let them keep up with that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Splinty Posted August 22, 2000 Share Posted August 22, 2000 That difinitely explains why that f@#$%ing Panther in VoT! is kicking my butt! ------------------ Nicht Schiessen!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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