Yeknodathon

[... tail defies gravity, stops twirling in mid-air while experiencing strange hallucinogenic visions involving menacing black obelisks and rubber gnomes throwing bones into the air much like a Stanley Kubrick production] Oh, bugger... I'm nibbling thistles at the speed of light. How very bothersome. [ March 24, 2004, 04:02 AM: Message edited by: Yeknodathon ]

[... swings it again, so as to randomly scatter some nutrinos across the paddock] *sniff* ... well, that just proves it, yer got leg warmers. Pathetic. [... considers existence while tugging at the year's first Spring thistle] I just wanted to say I've been feeling absolute zero for rather a long time. And I don't think it will get much better. No. And since me absolute zeros have been happening for rather a long time I must deduce I have mass. And since me awareness of time has been going on for... *nibble, nibble* ... for [counts as high as limbs allow] ... lots, I should think me mass is rather enormous. Yeknod

Oh... [swings the special quantum tail, in various states of being] ... so we can stuff yer in a box with a split-personality cat? Marvellous... I like experiments. One can never have too much astroletsgetphysicals. [... thinks some more] Olivia Newton John... [... again] ... trollop... never liked leg warmers. Yeknod [ March 24, 2004, 02:26 AM: Message edited by: Yeknodathon ]

You smoothie, you... *sniff* knowing how to make a donkey, well, feel... erm... humid. Erm... well, yer couldn't extend it a wee bit... yer know, to add a smidgen of self-mocking irony? Eh? Yes?

Oh.. bother

*sniff* could use planks or a log?

For a gnome? It's when somebody shoves a stick up your ***. </font>

He only sends his turns after receiving mine... which will make it August. 2010. Yeknod

... pommes frites-wielding bicycle racers...

[peers from behind a bush...] Belgians *sniff* sort of like Scunthorpe at sleep... nothing mayonnaise couldn't sort out, I say. Yeknod

I should think the rate of boggs is a Jim. [ March 12, 2004, 04:19 AM: Message edited by: Yeknodathon ]

[... scrawled in thickest crayon, and solemnly guarded by a rubber gnome strapped to a pole with heavy chains and a rather large padlock, a sign... ] FRE EEK EKE FEE FREE THE CESSPLOD ONE! Yeknod [ March 09, 2004, 01:41 PM: Message edited by: Yeknodathon ]

Hello darkness my old friend I've come to talk with you again Because a vision softly creeping Left its seeds while, I was *honking* And the vision that was planted in me brain Still remains within the sound of *sniff* In restless dreams I walked alone Narrow streets of rubbered gnome 'Neath the halo of a street lamp I turned me fungal-encrusted rump to the cold and damp When my eyes were stabbed by the flash Of a neon light that split the night And touched the sound of *sniff* And in the naked light I saw Ten thousand Boos maybe more Boos talking without speaking Boos writing songs that voices never share And no one dare disturb the sound of *sniff* Fools said I, you do not know *sniff* like a fungal infection grows Hear me words that I might teach you Take me hooves that I might reach you But me words like silent raindrops fell And echoed in the wells of *sniff* And the people bowed and prayed To the neon gnome they made And the sign flashed out its warning In the words that it was forming And the signs said The words of Nobbits are written On the sub-way walls and tenement halls And whisper'd in the sound of *sniff* Well, I feel much better for that. ...well, I don't really. Garfunkle... pathetic. Yeknod [ March 08, 2004, 01:39 PM: Message edited by: Yeknodathon ]

*sniff* patisserie, marvellous. [ponders a bit] Gnome en croute... [... and some more] ... or a little tartlet. *sniff*... very bijou and cosmopolitan in yer Parisian cafe lifestyle sort of way... and one can't be cosmopolitan enough in yer choice of pastry or tartlets or gnomes. [gazes glumly around the paddock fixing on an empty snail shell] I suppose that goes for molluscs, too. Oh, well... laa-de-daa. Yeknod

If I had a hammer I'd hammer in the morning I'd hammer in the evening All over this hand I'd hammer out danger I'd hammer out a warning I'd hammer out bones between my thumbies and my fingers All over this hand

[scribbles it down in the Paddock Journal in thickest potato] ... one can't get enough steroids, I say... Yeknod

Waste of a good lobster. Steve </font>

[snout appears from behind a particularly scrubby bush] *sniff* I don't know... me tail convulsed a bit... which is always of note to some... [falls, stomach-down, on top of the rubber gnome, to produce a pleasantly appealing rush of compressed air] *sniff* Yeknod

1 x Armalite AR18 1x Colt AR15 3x SKS 3x Mossberg 500A 12 gauge shotguns 1xWinchester .20 gauge auto 1x Custom 30-06 rifle w/scope rebored from mauser 2 x Beretta 92FS 1 x S&W Sigma 9mm 1 x S&W Sigma .40 1 x Ruger .44 Magnum Blackhawk Stainless 1 x Walther PPKS .380 1 x Colt Python .357 1 x Colt Trooper II .357 1 x Colt Cobra .38 1 x 2nd Generation .45 Colt SAA 1 x Ruger Mk II BBL .22 3 x M1 Carbine (2 WW2 vintage, 1 commercial) 1 Colt SAA Sesquincentennial .45 SAA unfired 1 Colt .45 SAA "Sherrif's Model" unfired (with extra cylinder for .44-40) 1 Colt Presentation Cased .44 Walker unfired 1 Wilkerson-Terry 9mm 1 Remington 870 12 gauge Kitty </font>

Thank you, I didn't think yer noticed.

1 x carrot, unfired? </font>

1 x carrot, unfired?

You forgot to *squimp* it. Mace </font>

I've got a rubber gnome. Would that help? No, didn't think so. Okay... I'll give it a go... Ahem... TNT... molten, slathering *honk*... maggoty thistles. That didn't feel better at all.

Potatoes. He smells potatoes. Yeknod