Speedbump

Well today has just been crappy all around. What better way to segue into Updates: MrSpnkr, (note to the audience: although raised in the ways of good Sir Joe, who does not play games with MBT member's handles, I make the exception for Spnkr.) I hates you, and by extension all of Texas and Oklahoma. Only a pernicious itinerant such as yourself would take such glee in the extermination of the barely pubescent teenagers Berli so kindly gave me in our little joust. (note to the audience: it is interesting that I can no longer find record of this scenario on Der Kessel or any of the scenario depots. Can we say Gamey?) Note to Spnkr: Nebraska 2-0 dalem, I hates you, a little less than Spnkr, but I still hates you. Anyone who would use a 'zook to kill a JagdPanther is just not cricket. Then you go and let the 'zook crew get killed. I was trying to rush the JagdPanther crew at them, but they died-a-lot too fast. Considering I seem to control the center of the map, and have the only remaining (it seems) armor left this game should end as it should with your utter destruction. DekeFentle, although this is our first game, I can with all confidence say, I hates you too. Somehow, my brilliantly designed attack has stalled. I fear that you have not shown me all your troops. You are also an impatient lout. Pawbroon, I hates you in a way that only an American can hate a Frenchman. After 4 weeks of vacation, you send me a note that says, "Would you believe that I forgot I was playing you?" The answer is NO. You were probably hungover, tired from your inefficient use of time (5 weeks of vacation is just wrong, unless they were mine...), or you remembered that you were whipping your poor Americans into the teeth of my defenses. armornut, who?

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by 109 Gustav: Now lets see if anyone knows what a white-gilled humpy is. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Please don't tell us. I am sure that the imaginations around here will be much better than the reality... Speedbump

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Mace: Sexual relationship? I like the game...but not that much! Mace<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Naw, you prefer sheep... Speedbump

Gentlemen, This utility sounds interesting. However, for those of us who are not died-in-the-wool modsluts ( ) is there a clean and concise list of instructions for both the patch program and the new one? I am used to understanding references in the Peng thread, but this discussion has me completely lost. Thanks for all the hard work! Speedbump

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by dalem: Which inbox? The one with turns in it from Berli and a non-pooler, but none from anyone else? That mailbox?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Sneaky, slipped a turn into my inbox without my looking. Why this type of system "skills" explains how you are able to beat me...wait have you beat me yet? Speedbump

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by dalem: Hey, if you have time to crank over turns for the vowel impaired, you have time to finish losing more of your expensive JagdPanthers to my cheap bazookas. Pick up the pace, boyo!<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Well check your inbox you long-haired, soon-to-be Minnesotan! Speedbump

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by CMplayer: Now don't any of you lot even THINK of challenging me to a pbem. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> No worries there... Speedbump

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by MrSpkr: National Champion Oklahoma Sooners 1-0 <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> How do you get a Sooner cheerleader into a campus party? Grease her hips and push like crazy! Go Cornhuskers! 1-0 Speedbump

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by MrSpkr: How am I doing? What's that? You say if he runs any faster, I'll burn out the tank engines chasing him? Oh. Never mind.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Actually, an incredibly complex and brilliant strategy of misdirection! Speedbump

Would also like to plug fellow Pengers: Der Kessel Speedbump

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Spnkr posted in the worst unit thread: Any of Speedbump's troops in our current PBEM.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Keep me out of your sick outerboard conversations you...you...you Grog! Speedbump

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by MrSpkr: Any of Speedbump's troops in our current PBEM.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Hey! Speedbump

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Joe Shaw: As to Jabo!, be VERY careful lad, you are terribly close to blasphemy. Jabo! IS a work of art on many levels, not least of which is it's length of only 10 turns. Can you imagine having to play and actually plot turns against some SSN swine for MORE than 10 turns? And besides ... it's just so damned PRETTY with all those explosions {sniff} ... now see what you've done, you've gotten me all emotional again. Joe<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Good Sir Joe, please do not misunderstand. Jabo! will clearly go down in the annals (somebody tie up Bauhaus!) of the MBT. It should still be used when a kannigit is cornered into playing a SSN. (In fact, my humble suggestion is to add a couple of 14" spotters!) However, as the move is to force Squires into playing SSN's, we should expect a little more effort on their part. As such, aiming a boresighted IG shouldn't stress them overmuch... Speedbump

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Joe Shaw: I do despair at times, there is no appreciation of irony here, there is no humor, there is no ART ... where DID Art go anyway, he was a pretty promising SSN. Joe<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Seems to me Sir Joe, that the scenario you are describing is an artfully crafted hazing scenario. While I was raised in the era of Jabo!, it seems to me like its days may be behind it. By your description, a few "artful" changes may make this scenario the new entry-level scenario for SSNs! Speedbump

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Lars: What I want to know is why can’t my machinegun team run faster as the ammo is used up, it’s a simple question of airspeed velocity, dammit!<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Is that an African or European machinegun team? Speedbump

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by dalem: updates!! I wouldn't want to imply that he knuckled under to - I mean rather that he gave in - or, well... <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Good Sir dalem, while you were so eloquently skewering my marital relationship, you failed to mention to the readership that your weakly defending Ami's are knuckling under to the advance of my ubertruppen! Speedbump [edited due to UBB-madness] [ 08-29-2001: Message edited by: Speedbump ]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Panzer Leader: Did I mention I think I have an evil twin?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Oh no...not two of them?!?!? Lorak, make sure and not accept the evil twin as a serf... Speedbump

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by MrSpkr: You aren't fit to lick the bootheel of a fine Southern gentleman coming in from a walk through the barn. Just wanted to keep you real.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I take it you are an expert because you see many of these gentlemen as they walk by you mucking out the stalls... Speedbump

As usual, Sir Joe, we stand ready to convi...er, stand in judgement of the accused! Simply bring on the Stenographers! Speedbump

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Mace: Do that again and I'll give you such a pinch! Mace<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Save it for your sheep you, you...Pommie! Speedbump

I am sure that Leoo (or is it Leeo?) will agree with me. We stand ready to sit in judgement (note: obligitory Bauhaus comment) of those thrice-damned Ozzies (hey, and lets just through in the zealanders too!). After all, they are just Poms at heart! Now where are the Stenographers!! Speedbump [Edited because I have happy fingers!] [Edited again to avoid accusations of redundancy, and repetition.] [ 08-24-2001: Message edited by: Speedbump ] [ 08-24-2001: Message edited by: Speedbump ]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Lorak: So it is with great pain that I move Panzerleader up from the rank of squire to the rank of Knight. Lorak the loathed<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I will grant you at the outset that I have not been active in the MBT as of late, but this announcement cries out for comment. That is just wrong. Wrong in too many ways to count. Wrong like that uncomfortable itch that you cannot scratch in public. Wrong like Shaw winning any other scenario than Jabo!. Wrong like the influence Ozzieland has on this thread. Just plain wrong... Speedbump [Edited because I want to fit in (dangit Bauhaus, I can't stop by without you sniffing around?!?)] [ 08-22-2001: Message edited by: Speedbump ]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by MrSpkr: Oh yes, by the way, Speedbump, send me a turn that I may slaughter you some more. You don't really have all that many men left to move, so it shouldn't take you too long.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Au Contraire, good *snicker* sir! I have plenty of men. They are just panicked or routed! Are you sure you didn't get a turn back around the 10th? PBEM Helper sent it! Jeff

Bump - Maybe I should just read the instructions! Speedbump

First off, nice job. This type of thing does take quite a bit of time. Not being a grog, I have often wanted a "cheatsheet" that would give me this type of information without having to scroll through all of the optional units. My main comment is that I would like to see a summary table. For example, a column with cost, then each of the ranges. Each row would represent the sum of the platoon. In this way we could quickly make comparisons without having to scan. Another thought would be is there a way to set up a table with weapons? Maybe columns representing weapon classes, rifles, SMGs, Squad MG's, etc. Just a thought or two. Speedbump