Lars

Not even a dirty trick is required. If you have any arty left, try smoking the whole area where his KTs are, rushing in your remaining armour and infantry on two flanks, and then enjoying the fun watching those slow turrets try to get you when the smoke clears.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR> Originally posted by Lorak: It is much easier for you guys to remember the couple of games you have finished. So just fire off an e-mail to me and I'll get the records updated.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Hah, you think I want to remember them? I was drunk the whole time, how am I supposed to do that? I foggily remember a win and a loss, or somfink. I also hazily recall being kniggeted by Berli but I’m still repressing that.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR> Originally posted by Seanachai: Peng has professed a desire to kick Lars in a sensitive place by way of greeting, and I can't imagine anyone who would come into the Twin Cities who wouldn't want to find Shandorf's goddamn address, break in, mace him in his own bed, and then float him out onto one of the many convenient lakes of the region handcuffed to a slowly leaking inner tube.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I really would expect no less from Peng, but I have no sensitive places. I would like to return the favor as Peng seems to have placed a curse on me. Now that I have the boiler up and running, the plumbing has gone on the fritz. Fortunately, and unlike Peng, I think I know how to use a monkey wrench. And as for Shandorf, the ”SS Boating While Intoxicated” is still in the lake, we don’t really need an slowly leaking innertube. Just bring rope, chain, and anchor weights. Then we can get back to the bar more quickly. <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR> Oh, and Hanns. Challenge someone to a goddamn game, you pillock! We've nothing against perverts as such, but we've a great deal against perverts who don't play the game! Challenge Lars. He's a good fellow, and as daft as any other loon of Scando descent.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Why, thank you very much Seanachai, sic the SSN’s on the newest Knigget. Couldn’t you have pointed him Slappy’s way? He seems to think he’s a DemiGod/Knigget/Squire/Serf/Pissboy/SSN/idjit or somesuch anyway. Be sure to bring an anchor for yourself (and Slappy). And more chains for Hanns, he seems to be into them. Game Updates: Agua Perdido - Thinks his PsyOps plan of not sending turns is going to work. Joke’s on him, as it usually is, as I spent the weekend drinking. CMplayer – Making good time, I hates him lots. You have my permission to execute that non-running MG team, Carriage-Return Boy. BuzzBuzzBuzz – Not making good time. It appears he thinks that if he drives his tanks back and forth across his side of the map, I’ll die of carbon monoxide poisioning and bordom. Time is running out, Buzz, pick a road and go for it. Now, turns will go out late this evening, after I reread the monkey wrench manual. And for the rest of you, Feh.

How about, “Peng Challenges the Damn Boiler to Work!” It’s freezing outside, it’s freezing inside, and I hate you all.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Slapdragon: Yes, but as a defacto squire of the pool (although Ronin) and soon a defacto knight, I must be faced. Also, look at the fine work I did setting up an alternative to the Peng thread to drain away the Grogs. By the way, I will bold your names when I attain knight hood. (Just a thought, I could invite all the friendly punters from the Antithecess Thread over here for a week to ease our ruptured feelings about have a competitor, would everyone like that? Then we could have regular get togethers, perhaps combining the two groups into one at some future date!!!! Boy, I would sure be willing to do this if it would make youse guys happy, really I would.) <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> ***BOOT*** Don't you realise that there are enough people to hate in the world already, without your putting in so much effort to give us another? ***BOOT*** Grasp your ears firmly and pull, you might just be able to remove your head from you a**. ***BOOT*** ***BOOT*** ***BOOT***

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Buzzsaw: Turning tail and running like a dog. Pretty funny to see a King Tiger run like that when it sees a couple of infantry squads. You are a yellow-bellied, Crodaberg-hiding bastiche. I will root you out. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> What’s even funnier is you failing to mention the pile of tanks right behind them. Wanna hear another good one? Lorak, scribe thusly in the tome of shame. Lars – Autosurrender (BTS, fix or do somefink) Stalin’s Organ – Gamey, Cheatin, Win Which puts you waaaaaaaaay behind schedule, Buzz. And Hanns, where’s my RSVP? Mistress Jean looks like she could use a Key Lime Martini or two.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Lawyer: I think Barney Fife has a nice ring to it. What say the others? <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I like Barney Fife (no bolding for Serfs). As I recall he only gets one bullet. Which is, strangely enough, an exact match for Slappys I.Q.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Slapdragon: I do not work out except fighting class, where my ass is routinely kicked by these two really big guys. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I knew it was going to be a good day!

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by dalem: My first weekend here my friends brought me over the border to some place called The Cajun Club for some entertainment and they were dismayed to find that it had been 'cleaned up' due to some local ordinances - apparently it went from full-blown skanky to only slightly skanky. They were crushed.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Don't ya hate it when they do that?

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by CMplayer: My name is Lars Larson, I come from Wiscarson, I verk in se strippy clubs dere. Venn I bounce them back on se street all se people I meet say, vuts your name? And I say...<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Why, you… you…{sputter, sputter}...I’ll get you for that. Wisconsin. Arrgh. You really know how to hurt a guy. {Although they do have a lot of nice “Gentlemen’s” clubs, bring your miner’s hat and your VISA, they don’t take American Express. Oh, and a Key Lime Martini.}

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Fieldmarshall: HEH HEH NEW SIGNATURE<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Oh dear God, now he's done it. Young 'uns, cover your eyes.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by MrSpkr: Oh geea, I am SOO embarassed. I forgot to close the door to the men's room behind me and look what scurried out from its afternoon snacking behind the toilet. **CRUNCH** Now, if I could just find a place to scrape my shoe . . .<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Oh yes, MrSpkr, we do (and will) hold you responsible for FrailMarshaMarshaMarsha.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Agua Perdido: look it up<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I did. No matches. More effort than I usually put into anything. And I'm not removing the dictionary from under the table leg. My drink will spill. <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR> after I return to Planet 10.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> A capital idea.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Slapdragon: Ahh yes, challenge 65 for me.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Nah, you're far more challenged than that.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR> Originally posted by Agua: Ah, so you're claiming the Heretical KLM's are what an aussie acquaitance of one once referred to as, "skirt lifter," eh? And why exactly would this mean that you don't drink 'em? <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Try to follow along now Agua, I’ll type slowly. Key Lime = Sweet. + Gin = Lonely Girls Friend. A combination made to order. The more you can get into her, the better. I, of course, am just there to help. And if I have to drink them too, well, it’s the least a Knight Errant can do (and never let it be said I didn’t do the least that I could do). <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR> As did you (assuming Lars is your real name), you amphibian-pimping amplexophile. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Yes, it is my real name. As for the rest of it, what? I may have gigged frogs, I may have even sold frogs, but what the heck is an amplexophile? Or are you just making words up? Awaiting a definition (and your setup) with sweetly baited breath. Sir Lars Ya, dat do feel gut.

Christ on a crutch, one post about Key Lime Martini’s and you lot go ballistic. Now pay attention. It’s not that I like them, it’s that the women like them. Please reread the post where I said that I was going to have sake. You may now go back to your wedding videos, which, I am sure, are devoid of anything resembling porn. And Agua, since you named yourself after something that frogs make love in, you can send the setup.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Berlichtingen: Ok, how many of you useless bastards live in the Miniappleless area? Against my better judgement, I am planning a trip (sans LSD) to your vile city.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Better bring the LSD, and warm clothing, the weather changes tonight.

Damn, I was so excited, I double posted. Now I have to go and change my armor. [ 10-02-2001: Message edited by: Lars ]

A Knigget!!! at last!. Gentlewryms and Dame of the Pool, I am duly whelmed. A ***BOOT*** all around to the Squires, Serfs, Pissboys, and, what the hey, even the SSN’s. In fact, a extra ***BOOT*** for the SSN’s, I’m in a charitable mood. For my Knightly Coat of Arms, I’ll take a JagdPanther (did you know they’re a superweapon?) boresighted upon the nether regions of a bent over SSN with Running Machineguns rampant overhead on a field of undermodeled Gamey Yellow. I’d like to thank my Liege, Shaw, for helping me to truly understand what gamey is. I couldn’t have done it without you Sire, you’re the best! {sniff, sniff, snort, somebody pass a snot rag, I think I’m going to cry}. Wow, five games, the time does drag when you had to play the following pillocks, I couldn’t have done it without you idjits either. Your ticking gifts are in the mail, wrapped in blue. Panzerleader – My favorite Win, defending against the assault as Allies. Iskander – Win, but my battle scarred liver lost. Stalins Organ – Twice, one Win, one Draw. panzerwerfer42 – Oscar for best movie, a Win of course. And two that bravely ran away, Geier and Juardis. Current Game Updates: Stalin’s Organ – Inside the wire of ”Crodaburg”, he’ll probably win this one, unless more gamey reinforcements show up. CMplayer – Advancing nicely in the “Scenario with No Suprises” (thanks, MrSpkr), We’re about to see if a 20mm can get a penetration against the side of a Sherman turret, because evidently it can’t against the rear. Buzzsaw – Out to lunch, just like his troops who are still trying to get organized for the assault on ”Crodaburg”. And Dalem, since you decided Downtown was the place to settle (Why? Didn’t have cab fare to go any further?), try The Uptown Café (great breakfast, Bloody Mary’s) and Chino Latino’s (Key Lime Martini’s for after-breakfast dessert and to put a nice glow on the rest of the day, handily located across the street). In fact, I think I’ll head there tonight for sake, I feel like celebrating. [ 10-02-2001: Message edited by: Lars ]

gunnergoz, you're an evil person. I like that.

Iskander, I was wondering where you been. Still drinking the Thunderbird? I’d stick around to chat but the liquor store is about to close.

Find your opponent with the infantry, then rush in the armor to clear him out (quick turrets are a plus). Keep a reserve of armor to outflank his supporting armor. Repeat as necessary. Of course, with such limited LOS, these battles always turn into tense little knife fights. Had one PBEM QB with all armor, at night, in the fog. What a riot.

Lets see now, Slapdragon is an utter pillock who already has pretensions of being a Knigget. Seanachai is a long winded bore who actually invites in SSN scum like the above. The conclusion, therefore, Slapdragon should squire Seanachai.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by CMplayer: Lars for every week you delay sending a turn the agony of your HJ (armed with globulous zits) is only prolonged. Now if you would just be so kind as to either: 1) fight back, or 2) hit ctrl-U and send, we can get this over with and continue with our lives. Oh and don't shoot at the paras. They're actually a Red Cross mercy shipment of full scale Marlene Dietrich Dolls (with authentically modelled naughty bits) and 200 crates of deluxe xtra soft kleenex. You were complaining by email about how hard it was to find good facial tissue these days, and my heart goes out to ya man.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Dang it, I was waiting on you. It said sent, but I'll send it again. You may now go back to your smelly fish.

Do you know how boring work is when you actually have to work? Thank God (or Berli as the case may be) that the MBT is back up.