Joe Shaw Posted October 13, 2006 Share Posted October 13, 2006 Originally posted by Boo Radley: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Joe Shaw: I mean, look around you, if YOU were a parent and had sired one of THESE clowns, would YOU then take the chance to have a little girl that might be forever scarred by having THAT for a big brother? Joe I just tried to parse that sentence and almost gave myself a nose bleed. I have spent the entire morning and most of yesterday, photographing industrial brushes. Now, I get to outline and retouch them. When I was but a little photographer, I decided to go to school to learn my craft. The President of the school, K. Terrence Guthrie, told me that if I went to the Ohio Institute of Photography and Screen Door Repair, I would have hot babes just dripping right off me for the rest of my life. LYING SWINE!!! </font> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lars Posted October 13, 2006 Share Posted October 13, 2006 Originally posted by Boo Radley: I just tried to parse that sentence and almost gave myself a nose bleed. I have spent the entire morning and most of yesterday, photographing industrial brushes. Now, I get to outline and retouch them. When I was but a little photographer, I decided to go to school to learn my craft. The President of the school, K. Terrence Guthrie, told me that if I went to the Ohio Institute of Photography and Screen Door Repair, I would have hot babes just dripping right off me for the rest of my life. LYING SWINE!!! Au contraire. They still run away, don't they? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrPeng Posted October 13, 2006 Author Share Posted October 13, 2006 Originally posted by Joe Shaw: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by SturmSebber: I protested! Anyone who posts pictures of scarecly clad men can't be all bad. You're a SERF ... SERFS don't get a vote on Coventry ... and a damned good thing judging by your following posts. Damned ferriners, seems there's more Goober Nationals than ever around here. IT WILL COME TO NO GOOD I TELL YOU! That's it, I'm starting a campaign, which of the following do you recommend for a slogan for the campaign? Or do you have a recommendation? <big>Build a Fence Around The Internets!</big> <big>No More Goobers In The CessPool!</big> <big>Goobers Clog Up the Drains!</big> And no, I'm not talking about CURRENT members ... not much we can do about those. But we can preserve our precious bodily fluids by ensuring that we keep the riff-raff out or AT LEAST review their applications more closely. And I think a little identification would help. I propose that all Goober Nationals be required to wear a big Goober on their lapel ... of course in most cases they've already met this requirement. Joe </font> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrPeng Posted October 13, 2006 Author Share Posted October 13, 2006 Howaboota little sing-song? Lullaby (The Divorce Song) by Stephen Lynch Hush little girl sweet, sweet baby don't cry, tonight. Daddy is here and he'll sing you a soft lullaby tonight. Why can't it all be like was before? How can I explain why mommy's not here anymore? Cause daddy likes porno and ten dollar whores. Daddy gets wasted and robs liquor stores. Daddy likes rubbing against little boys on the bus. I think that's why your mommy left us. Hush little girl there is no reason to fret tonight. Don't mind the smoke daddy just wants to forget (inhales and holds) tonight. Soon it will be all be like it was before, Any minute she will walk through that front door. But daddy likes poker and drinks lots of beer Then he wants sex that involves mommy's rear Daddy has sores on his naughty parts oozing with pus I think that's why your mommy left us Please don't cry, I swear i'll try to be by your side. Right after daddy gets home from the bar, Visits his bookie and steals a new car, He'll drive to the strip club and if Daddy plays his cards right, He'll bring home your new mommy tonight. Li de die, Li de die die de die die die de die, Li de die Li de die die de die die de die Li die de die de die Le die die de die Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted October 13, 2006 Share Posted October 13, 2006 ~3c.ii You forgot to blame me for carpy rules/no rules for the influx of ferrin types.I THOUGHT something smelled fishy about it. Joe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lars Posted October 13, 2006 Share Posted October 13, 2006 Originally posted by MrPeng: Howaboota little sing-song?That reminds me... T-ball coach sentenced for beanball bribe DUNBAR, Pa., Oct. 13 (UPI) -- A former Dunbar, Pa., T-ball coach has been sentenced to one to six years imprisonment for offering a player $25 to bean an autistic teammate. Fayette County Judge Ralph Warman handed Mark Downs Jr. a six to 36 month sentence for each charge of conspiracy to commit simple assault and corruption of minors, the Uniontown (Pa.) Herald-Standard reported Friday. Warman ordered the sentences to be served consecutively. Downs was convicted of an incident in June 2005 when he gave player Keith Reese Jr. $25 to throw a baseball at autistic teammate Harry Bowers Jr. so the second boy would not be able to play in the game. Reese testified he hit Bowers with two warm-up balls before the game, one in the groin and one in the ear. And you call yourself a coach. For shame, come off the $25 bucks next time you cheapskate. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patchy Posted October 13, 2006 Share Posted October 13, 2006 Goobers have rights! Save the Goobers! Goobers are people too! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted October 13, 2006 Share Posted October 13, 2006 Originally posted by Patchy: Save the Goobers! Be the first on your block to collect the entire set! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrPeng Posted October 14, 2006 Author Share Posted October 14, 2006 Speaking of coaching, we are back to .500 with a 3-1 win Thursday night. Natalie had somewhere between 5 and 10 shots on goal, none of which went in. By the end of the 4th she was FRANTIC trying to get a score. Madeline also had a couple of shots, and she made a couple of good saves while in goal, although she did let the one by - a miscue with her defense. She otter have hollered them off the ball and picked it up, instead one of them kicked it as she was going to pick it up, the kick went awry and on to the foot of one of the strikers who put it in net with Madge out of position. For the most part though the whole team did a great job. They seem to get better every game. They talk to each other a lot more on the field. They still do a bit of excess and random calling for the ball, but a lot of times they actually communicate useful information like, "I'm open behind you," (yes they understand that the ball doesn't ALWAYS have to go forward!) and "look outside" and "it's off them let it go out." They pass to a location and not a person, they do one-touch passes and redirects, they kick it out of bounds if they are in trouble... Ah me, it really is good to see them play. One of the best things is they don't get on each other's cases when things go wrong. Winning is good. Getting a dozen 11 and 12 year old girls who didn't know each other to show such teamwork in just a few weeks is great. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrPeng Posted October 14, 2006 Author Share Posted October 14, 2006 Originally posted by Boo Radley: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Patchy: Save the Goobers! Be the first on your block to collect the entire set! </font> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stoat Posted October 14, 2006 Share Posted October 14, 2006 Originally posted by MrPeng: Speaking of coaching, we are back to .500 with a 3-1 win Thursday night. Natalie had somewhere between 5 and 10 shots on goal, none of which went in. By the end of the 4th she was FRANTIC trying to get a score. Madeline also had a couple of shots, and she made a couple of good saves while in goal, although she did let the one by - a miscue with her defense. She otter have hollered them off the ball and picked it up, instead one of them kicked it as she was going to pick it up, the kick went awry and on to the foot of one of the strikers who put it in net with Madge out of position. For the most part though the whole team did a great job. They seem to get better every game. They talk to each other a lot more on the field. They still do a bit of excess and random calling for the ball, but a lot of times they actually communicate useful information like, "I'm open behind you," (yes they understand that the ball doesn't ALWAYS have to go forward!) and "look outside" and "it's off them let it go out." They pass to a location and not a person, they do one-touch passes and redirects, they kick it out of bounds if they are in trouble... Ah me, it really is good to see them play. One of the best things is they don't get on each other's cases when things go wrong. Winning is good. Getting a dozen 11 and 12 year old girls who didn't know each other to show such teamwork in just a few weeks is great. The dirtiest game I ever officiated was between two U-12 girls teams. It makes me glad there are only coed teams here now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrPeng Posted October 14, 2006 Author Share Posted October 14, 2006 Yeah, little girls can be vicious to each other. The parents laugh when I say stuff like, "Why are you backing off from her!? SHE'S JUST A LITTLE GIRL! Get in there - sacrifice your body for the team! GO GO GO!" Before the games they all get mad and flex and grunt like animals. Its hilarious. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted October 14, 2006 Share Posted October 14, 2006 My favorite was the U-6 game I officiated years ago ... the goalie, all three feet four of him, picked up the ball two feet in front of the net, clenched his tongue between his teeth and kicked it ... right over his OWN head into his OWN goal. The same game the other teams (you DO understand that at that age you can always find the ball because it's in the middle of this huge scrum of ALL players on both teams EXCEPT for the goalies and one poor kid who was given strict orders NOT to move from in front of the goalie) squirted the ball out of the scrimmage toward ... wonder of wonders ... one of the goals. I, being the officious official, ran after the ball. The kid in front of that goalie, the one with the ORDERS, saw me running toward this ball that was rolling toward him ... so he reached down, picked it up and politely handed it to me. Oh yeah ... then there was the first game of the year when I was coaching my son ... and he scored his first hat trick ... that was pretty cool too. Joe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Capt Posted October 14, 2006 Share Posted October 14, 2006 Originally posted by MrPeng: Yeah, little girls can be vicious to each other. Classic Eve Complex. The drive to be First Mother is not only a primary driver of our entire species, it is polluting the very centers of our collective awareness to the point of being considered normal. And this in the face of 1500 years of concerted effort by the Church to prove otherwise. Girls are inherently vicious because they are cursed with the need to receive the best "seed" and be a foundation for entire races. It isn't fair but it probably explains a whole lot in the dairy aisle. Now combine this feminine drive with the modern constructs of power and we have the whole damn thing swinging back to a matricidal society where every little girl not only has to replace good ol Ma, devour Pa but also has to be a CEO in order to re-estblish the natural order of things. So where does this leave us poor bastard who have been cursed with testicles, a Y chromosome and a central driver which is the sum total of "lets get drunk and screw". Well the simple answer is that we are the gravel of the future..something to keep in mind but once it is laid, it should be quickly forgotten. The gays and women not only outnumber us but have a stronger evelutionary drive that leave us clearly heading towards the dust of history. Lets face it lads, muscle mass, fake tears and a working love-hammer is simply not enough anymore. In short, little girls are viscous because they have their eyes on the prize...humanity. In the end once our swimmers are harvested we will be food..or maybe soccerballs. But until the end we'll smile like idiots, be proud of our little girls and march into the fires of extinction, flexing and combing-over the entire way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Speedy Posted October 14, 2006 Share Posted October 14, 2006 Huh!?! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yeknodathon Posted October 14, 2006 Share Posted October 14, 2006 [sucking on a rather large acorn nut] Goober chromosomes... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bauhaus Posted October 14, 2006 Share Posted October 14, 2006 Originally posted by MrPeng: Yeah, little girls can be vicious to each other. The parents laugh when I say stuff like, "Why are you backing off from her!? SHE'S JUST A LITTLE GIRL! Get in there - sacrifice your body for the team! GO GO GO!" Before the games they all get mad and flex and grunt like animals. Its hilarious. I gotta love all this footie talk. Such a beautiful sport. My 14 year-old daughter and her friends were complaining how worthless their trainer is for their travel team. They said he teaches him nothing and he's mean. I told them to kick him in the balls. I mean that's the point of the bloody game any way, errrr, kicking balls that is. I'm getting ready for indoor season myself. Gonna make another attempt at seeing how many bones I can break as keeper this season. And that would be my own bones. Now back to our regularly scheduled show. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted October 14, 2006 Share Posted October 14, 2006 I gotta love all this footie talk.Footie! What the hell is this ... you turning GOOBER on us boy? Talk like a 'merican or put a goober on your lapel ... oh ... well take it off then but talk like a 'merican damnit. Joe {EDITED because I had originally said "we'll take it off then" and when I re-read it I had to go wash my hands just thinking about it} [ October 14, 2006, 10:52 AM: Message edited by: Joe Shaw ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rune Posted October 14, 2006 Share Posted October 14, 2006 Bah! Young pup Stoat had a dirty U12 Girls game. Did they kick you and call you names? Kinda like the Mutha beautiful Thread? Girls have the tendency to play the game and socialize more then the guys. The guys are proving they are macho by thinking they can run over each other, while the ladies do get even, they are more level headed about it. Having centered Loyola vs DePaul in women's soccer this week, and just got home from doing a U19 Boys and a U12 Boys, I can definitely say the guys are a bit harder to control. I am definitely behind an amendment to the Laws of the Game that would allow a referee to use a 2X4 to gain the player's attention when you tell them you don't want to see that again. That, or having to hear Seanachai and Joebobsing a duet of "You don't send me flowers". Bet I would never have to issue another card with that threat. Rune Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted October 14, 2006 Share Posted October 14, 2006 Originally posted by MrPeng: fookin file? Fookin' check your fookin' IN box. Fook. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stoat Posted October 14, 2006 Share Posted October 14, 2006 Originally posted by rune: Bah! Young pup Stoat had a dirty U12 Girls game. Did they kick you and call you names? Kinda like the Mutha beautiful Thread? Girls have the tendency to play the game and socialize more then the guys. The guys are proving they are macho by thinking they can run over each other, while the ladies do get even, they are more level headed about it. The girls do like to socialize more, especially at the younger ages, often to the extent of ignoring the ball to continue their gossip. However, when guys get mad at each other they get even within the course of the game. They lay down a hard tackle, or otherwise pick up the physicality. I've yet to see a guy pull another's hair, and then slap him. I did see that in the U-12 girls game. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stoat Posted October 14, 2006 Share Posted October 14, 2006 Originally posted by bauhaus: I'm getting ready for indoor season myself. Gonna make another attempt at seeing how many bones I can break as keeper this season. And that would be my own bones. I was nominated by the rest of the team to play keeper for a string of three games when our regular was out last indoor season. I actually did better than our regular keeper, but that is a rough position to play. I'll happily stay up front this season. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mace Posted October 14, 2006 Share Posted October 14, 2006 Originally posted by Speedy: Huh!?! Military Engineering Officer. You know what they're like. I will say one thing in his support however, he did mention getting drunk so he's sorta like a kindred spirit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted October 14, 2006 Share Posted October 14, 2006 Originally posted by The_Capt: In short, little girls are viscous... They're sticky...? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted October 15, 2006 Share Posted October 15, 2006 Originally posted by Boo Radley: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by The_Capt: In short, little girls are viscous... They're sticky...? </font> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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