The Peng Challenge Is a Dish Best Served Cold...

[Patchy]

Well, I finally got Rune...I had to actually intrude on his home and take the picture myself, but I have to do whatever it takes to get these pictures. (Word of warning to others that refuse to give me photos.)

This guy really does look like Charles Laughton!

Persephone

[imported_Hiram Sedai]

Hiram's confused.

I've seen what happens when photos are submitted. I cannot imagine that the fate of those who would not submit photos would be worse. I have been the victim twice because I was pictured next to MRPeng (in my world, his name is a constant) and that picture was sent to Lorak.

I do hope that I won't be the subject once more from Mrs. Evil. I should just be ignored.

Never was here, not me.

[Marlow]

Originally posted by Hiram Sedai:

Hiram's confused.

And this is a new development?

I do hope that I won't be the subject once more from Mrs. Evil.

But that untouched photo of you and little Croda was so cute.

I should just be ignored.

How true.

[Speedy]

Originally posted by Mace:

WANTED: good well balanced cesspooler

Not asking for much are you.

[Yeknodathon]

Originally posted by chrisl:

So much abuse. Where should I begin?

As for some of the suggestions as to what we should do with Shaw. I would strongly advise against trying to pull a vacuum on him-- he's an infinite source of hot air that will burn out any pump you put against him. Accelerating him into an anti-Shaw might be effective. We need to find one of those lurkers with a member number in the double digits and total posts in the single digits. It's a rather cruel thing to pull on such an unwitting victim (the lurker, not Shaw). Cryogenics would be my recommendation-- condense all the hot air around him into a puddle and freeze him into a block of whatever jelly substance he's made of. A quick trip to Minneapolis this time of year might be enough for that. The other option is a launch into space-- send him as a pizza delivery boy on Space Station, but without the spacesuit. Outer space ought to provide enough vacuum to suck out all the hot air.

Yes, I see.

Errrm, not looking for Shaw to circumnavigate the paddock at a blistering pace, just enough impetus for it to engage in a clueless amble. Yes, yes, nothing new here, but it needs careful direction towards the oncoming projectile. Tricky... how exactly is a Shaw controlled under laboratory conditions?

Idjit Yeknod

[Marlow]

Originally posted by Speedy:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Mace:

WANTED: good well balanced cesspooler

Not asking for much are you.</font>

[dalem]

Originally posted by Yeknodathon:

Tricky... how exactly is a Shaw controlled under laboratory conditions?

Idjit Yeknod

In extreme cases, by strangling him into unconsciousness with the arm of a lab coat.

[Guest PondScum]

Originally posted by Yeknodathon:

Tricky... how exactly is a Shaw controlled under laboratory conditions?

Well, ya know those sticks that aren't quite big enough for Croda-on-a-stick? You use them to poke strategically-placed holes in the ol' gasbag. Then you can get him to balance perfectly in place, spewing hot air in all directions.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got to go "muck out" some ladies-in-waiting.

[Marlow]

Originally posted by dalem:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Yeknodathon:

Tricky... how exactly is a Shaw controlled under laboratory conditions?

Idjit Yeknod

In extreme cases, by strangling him into unconsciousness with the arm of a lab coat.</font>

[Yeknodathon]

OGSF

Battle reports:

Liege, I bring a new meaning to failure:

PondDuck negotiations underway to resume hostilities. I've made arrangements for incontinence.

Berli after much advanced sneaking and lurking the Gopher has finally arrived... I've yet to score a hit, Liege, and the endeavour is pitiful. Rest assured, Liege, the wimpering has begun with abandon.

BodgedInBehind... strange, the enlightened (sic) carpenter has beguiled me into a state of reflection and sarvodaya. Activity involving loin cloths, latrines and spinning cotton has begun in full earnest. Everything is peaceful. Can't we all be friends?

Nobbit has become fixated with a Stuart. He wants me to move it. I refuse. Nothing happens. He takes a holiday. Liege, a pattern is beginning to form. We must not underestimate the power of depression.

Marine-buoy has become strangely quiet. Who knows what my half-traks have been doing... decimating another company, perhaps?

Gates-slut after a bright and joyful start the game has been reduced to a form of inertia and despair. True, he's winning the game but there's much mirth in the paddock that all meaning has been drained from the encounter. Liege, a grinding tedium has taken hold. I expect mental collapse to occur at any time.

Idjit Yeknod

[ February 12, 2002, 05:03 PM: Message edited by: Yeknodathon ]

[Patchy]

Originally posted by PondScum:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Yeknodathon:

Tricky... how exactly is a Shaw controlled under laboratory conditions?

Well, ya know those sticks that aren't quite big enough for Croda-on-a-stick? You use them to poke strategically-placed holes in the ol' gasbag. Then you can get him to balance perfectly in place, spewing hot air in all directions.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got to go "muck out" some ladies-in-waiting.</font>

[Guest PondScum]

Originally posted by Persephone:

Duckweed, actually you could "muck out" Idjit Yeknod's paddock...I don't think it's been "mucked out" for several years now.

<font size=+3>Nooo</font><font size=+2>oooo</font><font size=+1>oooo</font>oooo<font size=-1>oooo</font><font size=-2>oooo</font><font size=-3>oooo</font>

<font size=-3>I'll get you for this, mon petite liege.</font>

[Yeknodathon]

Originally posted by Persephone:

Duckweed, actually you could "muck out" Idjit Yeknod's paddock...I don't think it's been "mucked out" for several years now.

Persephone

Dark Lady, pah, the Duck ain't no Hercules... come an clean me stables, Augean loser

Idjit Yeknod

[Goanna]

Pondscum has deemed himself worthy of a challenge on the forces of scaliness. Normally, this would be treated with derision and peals of laughter at his impudence. However, a quick review of his profile reviewed that he is, in fact, a pom. And possibly a descendent of the powdered-wig elite by his address. He has been heard to snivel about some accused illegal appropriation of a subtitle that we may, or may not have find lying abandoned and given a good home. We have therefore decided to remove this subtitle legally (with the assistance of our solicitors, jdmorse and Associate Rottweilers, along with several large strips of flesh from this annoying phytoplankton, then treat the wounds with a salve of agent orange.

Mace if you have not found something to your satisfaction already, I suggest either "Fertile Ground" or "A Midnight Clear" from my good self that are available at the Scenario Depot. I also have another, "die Lehrer" still in testing that you might also find amusing. All are well balanced and have several options for victory to both sides.

[BFCElvis]

Wankers.

[Speedy]

Originally posted by Marlow:

Hey Speedy, are you still interested in finishing that Rune created fiasco that we started a while ago. I still have what I think is the last file. I've put your topplement off for far too long.

We are playing a game?? Who says you need to be old to lose your memory.

Sure send the file

[Joe Shaw]

Mace if you have not found something to your satisfaction already, I suggest either "Fertile Ground" or "A Midnight Clear" from my good self that are available at the Scenario Depot. I also have another, "die Lehrer" still in testing ...

Goanna it's not normally my practice to berate someone on their spelling, and I especially don't like to do it to an Australian since you operate under so many limitations as it is. HOWEVER ... it is important for the sake of finding the right scenario if no other reason that you correctly identify your new scenario. It's "Die Lawyer" ... and may I congratulate you on what is a fine title. Doubtless the scenario itself sucks rocks, it being one of yours, but the title is grand.

Joe

[ February 12, 2002, 07:02 PM: Message edited by: Joe Shaw ]

[Geier]

Right.

So I went and smacked tero on the head again. I'm sorry, can't help myself sometimes. I thought I had mastered the "Ignore Poster" jedi mind trick (I haven't read a post by uh, whatshisname ... ? In years.) but it seems I was wrong. What a horrible little person.

Speaking of which, Mark IV. Where is? Anyone?

Johan

[Leeo]

The Cistern Scryer yells "ALARM! ALARM!"

Of course the Cistern Scryer is a ragged piece of posterior puff, but nevertheless, a devious and dastardly plot has been uncovered.

While all of you are caught up in the bread-and-circuses intrigue detailing the faux-fall of Peng (bolded, as it should be), chasing the Gates-Slut like a sailor on leave to the shores of a Silicon Sodom, a vile and evil plot hath hatched forth from the forces of physics.

That vile and evil anti-physicist Wussl has freed the Peng to pursue tokamak experiments, striving to alter, fundamentally, the torn and tattered fabric of the universe. Well, ok, not so much, but there is no doubt he is attempting to achieve nuclear fusion. For the good of the MBT? I know not. But can we stand idly by, while the psuedo-Gates-Slut red herring formerly known as Peng attempts to ignite all of the methane within the pool. Check it out in the "Future Tech" section of the March '02 edition of Discover.

Martin Peng Strikes Again

Be afraid. Be...

[dalem]

Originally posted by Geier:

Right.

So I went and smacked tero on the head again. I'm sorry, can't help myself sometimes. I thought I had mastered the "Ignore Poster" jedi mind trick (I haven't read a post by uh, whatshisname ... ? In years.) but it seems I was wrong. What a horrible little person.

Speaking of which, Mark IV. Where is? Anyone?

Johan

tero and his ilk aren't worth it. I keep trying to tell myself that each time I get drawn into a 'my X is bigger than his X' argument. No matter how reasonable one tries to be, someone like that can always drop the conversation down a level. I still get drawn into them, but I keep telling myself that.

A simple "Aaauughghhhh!!! My eyes!!!!" in here usually works for me commenting on things like the Winter thread and what the Soviet MG thread has spun into.

[Seanachai]

Originally posted by Yeknodathon:

Persephone, Dark Lady, pah, the Duck ain't no Hercules... come an clean me stables, Augean loser

Idjit Yeknod

Actually, I rather like that. A Classical reference. Not a shatteringly good one, but you so seldom see that sort of thing, lately.

There is hope for the Donkey, indeed, I believe there is.

Oh, and Slapdragon, where is my next Taunt?

[Seanachai]

Originally posted by Persephone:

Well, I finally got Rune...I had to actually intrude on his home and take the picture myself, but I have to do whatever it takes to get these pictures. (Word of warning to others that refuse to give me photos.)

This guy really does look like Charles Laughton!

Persephone

Er, Persephone, dear Lady. Why is Clark Gable touching Rune's musket like that? Have they been long at sea?

Frankly, the whole picture explains many of Rune's scenarios, which, if I understand posts on the Outer Boards, would culturally offend Turks.

[ February 12, 2002, 11:43 PM: Message edited by: Seanachai ]

[Seanachai]

Originally posted by Geier:

Right.

So I went and smacked tero on the head again. I'm sorry, can't help myself sometimes. I thought I had mastered the "Ignore Poster" jedi mind trick (I haven't read a post by uh, whatshisname ... ? In years.) but it seems I was wrong. What a horrible little person.

Johan

Sigh. I confess, I cannot read these sorts of posts without being overcome with a sense of morbid curiousity, and seeking them out.

Which I did. And, as we all know, I cannot go out on to the Outer Boards without succumbing to a need to post. Which I did.

Now, Geier, please forgive me for intruding on your discussion with tero, but, well, I find him rather a puffed-up toad.

However, I did, in my remarks, try to follow the Peng Challenge Way:

I tried to be insightful, without contributing to the discussion in any positive way.

I used both sarcasm and satire, and indulged my own sense of fun without particular concern for whether I was furthering the topic, irritating the other participants, or winning friends and influencing people.

Regarded my own, egotistical sense of what I wanted to say as being every bit as valid as the sewage being fobbed off as 'wisdom' by humourless pillocks who only show up in threads in order to 'score points' and endlessly hammer their 'Opinions Dressed Up As the Truth' down the throats of all other posters (the latter, Johan, being a reference not to yourself, but certain other humourless Northerners).

Now, although it is quite late, I think I will go off and write an expose of the Finns and the Winter War.

Dear me. It seems that with the posting of my final remark, BTS has locked that thread. I'm sure it's all my fault, and not because of certain nationalistic cretins endlessly expounding their personal vision of superiourity. I'm so ashamed. Rather than work on my piece regarding the Winter War, I shall go and say a prayer for Finland, in an attempt to atone.

I shall work on my expose of the Finns tomorrow, instead.

[ February 13, 2002, 01:16 AM: Message edited by: Seanachai ]

[dalem]

Originally posted by Seanachai:

Now, although it is quite late, I think I will go off and write an expose of the Finns and the Winter War.

Better that than lose another halftrack, eh there?

[Seanachai]

Originally posted by dalem:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Seanachai:

Now, although it is quite late, I think I will go off and write an expose of the Finns and the Winter War.

Better that than lose another halftrack, eh there?</font>