I Challenge Peng to Eat a Bug

[rune]

Berli, Berli, Berli ,

If I wanted to whine, I would just do impressions from the outer board. I still fight on with what I was given...and caused his tanks to withdraw twice. Not bad for a Verdun like Charge over open grass. Oh wait...that's right...you cannot do that in CMBB. Silly me...

However, I did want to correct Marlow and his definition of AT Assets. A german with a rubber band is NOT the anti-tank weapon that a Finn with a toothpick is.

I will consider this a moral victory if I have anyone survive....

Rune

[Marlow]

Originally posted by rune:

Berli, Berli, Berli ,

If I wanted to whine, I would just do impressions from the outer board. I still fight on with what I was given...and caused his tanks to withdraw twice. Not bad for a Verdun like Charge over open grass. Oh wait...that's right...you cannot do that in CMBB. Silly me...

However, I did want to correct Marlow and his definition of AT Assets. A german with a rubber band is NOT the anti-tank weapon that a Finn with a toothpick is.

I will consider this a moral victory if I have anyone survive....

Rune

Withdraw? Ptttppppt. I wave my hand at you. My tanks were only repositioning to get a better shot.

[**YK2**]

Originally posted by Lars:

Tell us another story, m'lady.

You're an insomniac then Lars ?

[Nidan1]

Off page two.

[Guest Mike]

Originally posted by YK2:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Lars:

Tell us another story, m'lady.

You're an insomniac then Lars ?</font>

[Seve]

My useful post will be following: I sure ain't gona start mountain biking in this or any following lives of mine

[Lars]

If you keep posting tripe like that you’ll put me to sleep.

so SOD OFF!!!

And Mike you idiot, Peng is a pod, not a bug. You would know that if you weren't a Mike you idiot.

[Guest Mike]

Originally posted by Lars:

And Mike you idiot, Peng is a pod, not a bug. You would know that if you weren't a Mike you idiot.

If I wasn't a [m]Mike you idiot I'd have more sense than to be here.

Is there any aprticular reason why Peng can't be both? I mean he does keep gettign crushed liek a bug, so I figure form follows function......

Speaking of which have you done that turn for me you lilly-livered lazy leprechaun?

[Gaylord Focker]

Originally posted by Seve:

My useful post will be following: I sure ain't gona start mountain biking in this or any following lives of mine

Then why are you wearing a helmet?

[ December 02, 2002, 08:42 PM: Message edited by: Gaylord Focker ]

[Lars]

Originally posted by Mike:

Speaking of which have you done that turn for me you lilly-livered lazy leprechaun?

Check your in-box. This is the second time I've sent it.

[rleete]

I'd just like to congratulate Remmington Arms on correctly modeling the penetration values for a 12 gage shotgun slug against the MkI Bambi. Side upper hull penetration, no death clock.

The "frickin overmodeled spotting, non-tiring while sneaking, uber sound contact using" deer were no match for my perfect hull down position, fast turret and covered arc.

Bambi-0

Roger-1 (take that, Lars)

What I want to know is, why doesn't BFC model skinning and eating your battlefield kills?

[Lars]

Originally posted by R_Leete:

What I want to know is, why doesn't BFC model skinning and eating your battlefield kills?

All together now, lads.

”Outside the scope of a typical WWII battle!!!”

[Leeo]

CRAP!

This has turned into some demented sewing bee on bad acid.

"Nyah nya nyah nyah na."

"Nya NYAH nya Nyah yah."

Where's the hate? Where's the over use of substances?

Where's the heart and soul of that bad buggerin' boy, Peng?

I hate MrSpkr, because really, who can't get behind hating a pretentious lawyer?

I hate OGSF because he talks like an exile from Babel.

I hate Aussie Jeff, just to satisfy my urge to belong.

I hate Boo Radley because he is a jocular prig.

I hate Moriarty because he apparently sends turns according to the geological clock.

I hate Panzer Leader because he complains about me confusing him with Aussie Jeff.

I hate Deke Fenkle because he's kicking my ass in an old CMBO QB. I'd feel better if he kicked my ass in something current.

I hate Seanachai because he is a wordy blaspheme, and has never challenged me to a game.

I hate Joe Shaw, because he represents the establishment; the status quo. That, and he's never played a game of CM with me.

I hate outerboarders because they are so deserving, aren't they?

Most of all, I hate all of you. There's a certain symmetry in that, in't there?

[Guest Mike]

Originally posted by Lars:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Mike:

Speaking of which have you done that turn for me you lilly-livered lazy leprechaun?

Check your in-box. This is the second time I've sent it.</font>

[Snarker]

Originally posted by R_Leete:

I'd just like to congratulate Remmington Arms on correctly modeling the penetration values for a 12 gage shotgun slug against the MkI Bambi. Side upper hull penetration, no death clock.

The "frickin overmodeled spotting, non-tiring while sneaking, uber sound contact using" deer were no match for my perfect hull down position, fast turret and covered arc.

Bambi-0

Roger-1 (take that, Lars)

Help Lars a bit. Whose urine mod are you using?

PL - I can't finish bleeding all over the victory flags if you bogart the game file. Maybe between asking, "fries with that?" you could grace me with a turn?

[Guest Mike]

Originally posted by Snarker:

PL - I can't finish bleeding all over the victory flags if you bogart the game file. Maybe between asking, "fries with that?" you could grace me with a turn?

I think he's still trying to master that phrase.

[Snarker]

Originally posted by Seve:

My useful post will be following: I sure ain't gona start mountain biking in this or any following lives of mine

We insist you mountain bike 2 hours a day, six days a week. Future generations will be grateful for your infertility.

[Lars]

Originally posted by Leeo:

This has turned into some demented sewing bee on bad acid.

Ooh, I hate those.

[Guest Mike]

Originally posted by R_Leete:

The "frickin overmodeled spotting, non-tiring while sneaking, uber sound contact using" deer were no match for my perfect hull down position, fast turret and covered arc.

Shouldn't you have reversed when you're in that position?

I'm sure you should've - your AI ('cos you sure don't have any natural I) is designed to get you out of shot in precisely those circumstances because you're actually overmatched even tho it doesn't look like it.

There's a thread about exactly this started by some chap called GingerBear or something like that......

[ December 02, 2002, 10:28 PM: Message edited by: Mike ]

[Seanachai]

Originally posted by R_Leete:

I'd just like to congratulate Remmington Arms on correctly modeling the penetration values for a 12 gage shotgun slug against the MkI Bambi. Side upper hull penetration, no death clock.

The "frickin overmodeled spotting, non-tiring while sneaking, uber sound contact using" deer were no match for my perfect hull down position, fast turret and covered arc.

Bambi-0

Roger-1 (take that, Lars)

The buggers probably got chronic wasting disease. Which reminds me:

Panzer Leader, enlighten me. Are you trying for the 'Lifetime Achievement Award' for Thread titles that should have been flung to the pit bulls?

I mean, really. Fifty percent of all respondents indicated that your thread titles induced vomiting, while the other fifty percent, after being revived, indicated it caused catatonia. Twelve percent indicated that both occurred (results equal more than 100% because of rounding, statistical error, and because your sodding Thread titles are that bloody awful).

Now, having properly chastised our very own Thread Fool for his endless efforts to carry out the alternately hissed and screamed demands of Peng to kill the Thread, once and for all, it's time to acknowledge a very good bit, that made even an aging Gnome chuckle with enjoyment.

Kudos to our own YK2 for her frabjous Bedtime Story! It is efforts like that, from those who are not so lost to the catholic rote of abuse/boast/belittle/flaunt that make getting caught up on the Thread of threads a treat, rather than a chore. I don't ask everyone to think outside the box, but I ask that some of you at least start going to the bathroom outside it.

Extremely high-powered negotiations, brain-storming, and very high-end muttering are going on in elevated circles via email regarding the Cesspool Tournament of Winos.

Treeburst (did I mention that the average serial killer would envy his energy levels and attention to horrific detail?) has agreed to help organize things. Winecape has not yet denied an interest in rewarding the winner(s) with alcohol from a land down under, but not quite as far down under as Australia, so, in fact, a land rather around the base of the spine, rather than the lower round of the arse cheeks. I believe he'd be willing to donate some actually decent wine, but, in keeping with traditions of the Cesspool, it might be more appropriate if he sent the South African equivalent of 'screwtop piss noir'. Then again, there's a certain twisted rightness to the idea of Cesspoolers swilling fine South African wines out of ceramic mugs shaped like cowboy boots, souvenir Euro-Disney plastic cups, and currently unused urine sample jars.

The sticking point, of course, is the Justicar, whose sense of tradition makes the Hassidim look like a bunch of New Age Dadaists. But I'm sure that suitable brib-... er, arguments, will be found to lead him into the light. Preferably fully clothed, and without that distressing tendency to sing show tunes.

Finally, let me say that Peng and I have bought our forces in the New Game, and stand poised to flail the skin from each other with a great gnashing of teeth and many a profound curse. He is attacking, as the Germans, in an 800 base point game. I'm defending, in a village. 'Village' is a serious misnomer, on the Battle Generator's part. You couldn't get a blue collar New Jersey boy to spend a night in this place, and if this is what the Supreme Soviet has achieved for the People, then bring on the Romanoffs.

Now, unlike every single game I have ever played against Berli, I cannot expect God to intervene on my behalf and smite Peng as he so justly deserves. So stay tuned to this 'Battle of the Olde Ones'.

Oh, and it's 11º Fahrenheit here with light snow on the ground. You lads and lasses from the 'lower round of the arse cheeks' will never achieve manly, virile temperatures like this. Or, if you did, you'd die. But we Northern types simply curse, and shrug it off. Oh, and drink a lot.

[ December 02, 2002, 10:49 PM: Message edited by: Seanachai ]

[Guest Mike]

Originally posted by Seanachai:

Oh, and it's 11º Fahrenheit here with light snow on the ground. You lads and lasses from the 'lower round of the arse cheeks' will never achieve manly, virile temperatures like this. Or, if you did, you'd die. But we Northern types simply curse, and shrug it off. Oh, and drink a lot.

Quite right - if we ever had temperatures like that we'd end up like you and be obliged to shoot ourselves from sheer self pity!

In the mean time we sit out in the sun.......and drink a lot.

hhmmmm....seems we have more in common than I thought.....

[ December 02, 2002, 11:04 PM: Message edited by: Mike ]

[Seanachai]

Originally posted by Mike:

In the mean time we sit out in the sun.......and drink a lot.

hhmmmm....seems we have more in common than I thought.....

"Genius 'round the world stands hand in hand, and one shock of recognition runs the whole circle' round."

Art Linkletter, strangely enough. The man must've drunk like a fish!

[Guest PondScum]

Originally posted by Seanachai:

<font size=-1>Panzer Leader, enlighten me. Are you trying for the 'Lifetime Achievement Award' for Thread titles that should have been flung to the pit bulls?

I mean, really. Fifty percent of all respondents indicated that your thread titles induced vomiting, while the other fifty percent, after being revived, indicated it caused catatonia. Twelve percent indicated that both occurred (results equal more than 100% because of rounding, statistical error, and because your sodding Thread titles are that bloody awful).</font>

Bleeding from the eyes. You forgot BLEEDING FROM THE EYES.

I can barely see straight enough through the red haze to shoot your oncoming human wave.

Oh, wait, that's not bleeding from the eyes. THAT'S JUST MY BLOOD RAGE.

Never mind. Carry on then.

[Noba]

Originally posted by Leeo:

CRAP!

This has turned into some demented sewing bee on bad acid.

"Nyah nya nyah nyah na."

"Nya NYAH nya Nyah yah."

Where's the hate? Where's the over use of substances?

Where's the heart and soul of that bad buggerin' boy, Peng?

I hate MrSpkr, because really, who can't get behind hating a pretentious lawyer?

I hate OGSF because he talks like an exile from Babel.

I hate Aussie Jeff, just to satisfy my urge to belong.

I hate Boo Radley because he is a jocular prig.

I hate Moriarty because he apparently sends turns according to the geological clock.

I hate Panzer Leader because he complains about me confusing him with Aussie Jeff.

I hate Deke Fenkle because he's kicking my ass in an old CMBO QB. I'd feel better if he kicked my ass in something current.

I hate Seanachai because he is a wordy blaspheme, and has never challenged me to a game.

I hate Joe Shaw, because he represents the establishment; the status quo. That, and he's never played a game of CM with me.

I hate outerboarders because they are so deserving, aren't they?

Most of all, I hate all of you. There's a certain symmetry in that, in't there?

I'm disappointed...I really am.

Noba.

[Treeburst155]

OK, listen up you wankerous warts. I'm only gonna say this five times, so pay attention.

We're having a tournament. It will be called the Cesspool Tournament of Winos. It has been approved by....well, nobody actually; BUT, it has been discussed with that idjit Justicar, and I'm sure he'll go for it if, heaven forbid, he actually makes it back from this business trip he's on. The whole bad idea was hacked out by the UberGnome (including the name), so it's all Panzer Leader's fault anyway.

Now then, if you want to play in this tournament, Sod Off!!. You're too competitive and should banish yourself to the outer boards. There's a tourney out there that, if won by you, will definitely enlarge that which is most important to you.

If you don't want to play in this tourney then consider yourself drafted. What you don't want, the Mutha Beautiful Thread absolutely insists that you get. This is as it should be.

How It Works

The draftees will each play one game. The game will be a smallish QB of exactly 500-1000 points. You (the draftee) will make ridiculous purchases. Your OOB should reflect perfectly the alcoholic stupor in which you live your life.

When the battle is over, you will sober up just enough to tell us all about it here on the MBT. We need to know everything... battle parameters, units purchased, gamey tactics, why you hate your opponent, how he cheats, how you cheat, why your cheating is justified, etc.. IOW, we need a colorful and complete AAR from you.

Once all the games are finished, and the AARs posted, there will be a vote of the entire Cesspool to decide the winner of the tourney. The Voters will make their decisions based on every aspect of your AAR. If your AAR is entertaining, and you've bribed and/or threatened enough Voters, you just may win the wine so generously provided by WineCape.

Finally, you must send an email to the address in my profile acknowledging your status as a recruit (You've been drafted, remember?) in the Cesspool Tournament of Winos. If you don't, you will be hunted down, locked up, and poked with a very long, sharp stick until those who have fulfilled their obligation are released from military service.

Intelligence test: make the subject of the email, "Cesspool, your forum name".

NOTE: This description of the tourney could change at any time. It probably won't, but it could if the senior Pooligans poke me with a sharp enough stick.

Now, let's make a deal. I'll Sod Off, if you Die-A-Lot Now first. No deal? Then Sod Off!!

Treeburst155, proud Squire to Senior Knight More-Arty, Defender of Lost Causes

[ December 03, 2002, 01:48 AM: Message edited by: Treeburst155 ]