Mace Posted March 13, 2003 Share Posted March 13, 2003 Originally posted by Nidan1: As I am working my way through the witless nongs down under Noba, Speedy and Aussieloon come to mind right now, perhaps you would not mind being my next victim, so to speak. I am nearly finished with those Joey packers, ***slap*** ***slap*** (that was the gauntlet of doom by the way) That was the most lamest, limp-wristed (not that there's any thing wrong with that), pathetic, saddest, wretched, dismal and pitiable taunt I've ever been challenged with. Regardless, these feeble mewlings of yours have moved me like no other laxette have, and so against my better judgement please feel free to send me a setup forthwith. Kindest regards Mace Now excuse me while I attempt to retrieve this thong. [ March 13, 2003, 05:19 AM: Message edited by: Mace ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rune Posted March 13, 2003 Share Posted March 13, 2003 Originally posted by MrSpkr: Liar. As if anyone would believe something as crazy as that. Hah. Hockey in Florida, what's next, software companies in Maine or somefink? Steve A lawyer with a conscience? Rune Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nidan1 Posted March 13, 2003 Share Posted March 13, 2003 Originally posted by Mace: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Nidan1: As I am working my way through the witless nongs down under Noba, Speedy and Aussieloon come to mind right now, perhaps you would not mind being my next victim, so to speak. I am nearly finished with those Joey packers, ***slap*** ***slap*** (that was the gauntlet of doom by the way) That was the most lamest, limp-wristed (not that there's any thing wrong with that), pathetic, saddest, wretched, dismal and pitiable taunt I've ever been challenged with. Regardless, these feeble mewlings of yours have moved me like no other laxette have, and so against my better judgement please feel free to send me a setup forthwith. Kindest regards Mace Now excuse me while I attempt to retrieve this thong. </font> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted March 13, 2003 Share Posted March 13, 2003 Originally posted by Mace: Well, what can I say but the fine, lovely ladies requested it, and Mace is here to deliver..... <big><big>SNIPPED!</BIG></BIG> ...in the nick of time. If ever you should decide on a repeat performance, might I make a suggestion? In order to save time, why not bake yourself right into the cake?! Just gently fold yourself into the batter and bake for 45 minutes at 350°. Eat your heart out, Martha Stewart. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
**YK2** Posted March 13, 2003 Share Posted March 13, 2003 Originally posted by Hiram Sedai: Regarding the brain dead among you that think I am pretending to be female or somefink: You may count me among the most homophobic people you have had the displeasure of meeting. I pretend to be nothing more than an oversexed, underappreciated pariah of society. I cared about what you thought for approximately 30 seconds and then I decided that it doesn't really matter. I found my soulmate. So, you can pull your collective lip up over your collective head and swallow. Eat me, I'm a danish. Tis a shame you are Homophobic Hiram I hope you get better real soon..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
**YK2** Posted March 13, 2003 Share Posted March 13, 2003 Originally posted by Mace: Would you all be interested to hear how my thong kept creeping? MaceTip: Replace said thong with some Trunk style boxers. No creeping, and so much more.... so much more.... well, just so MUCH MORE... *Drool* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lars Posted March 13, 2003 Share Posted March 13, 2003 Originally posted by Moraine Sedai: hoots, hollers and catcalls* *throws dollar bills at Mace* I told you, use coins. You might get lucky and hit him in the head. SSN Hint Of The Day: When giving directions, leave out a turn or two. Now sod off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest konrad Posted March 13, 2003 Share Posted March 13, 2003 NISSAN1 ,Miriam ,Mikethehamster,Vadr ,Master of Waffle(forget) and Hortlund(pathetic battle,but you are not able to finish in time even that one) ,Goffy - I'm waiting. To all of you ,so preoccupied with sex ,alcohol,harlots high's and low's and abominations of the earth : Memento Mori konrad (angel) Faithful Squire To Sir AUSSIEJEFF PS:fight the Beast!!! [ March 13, 2003, 10:13 AM: Message edited by: lenakonrad ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lurkur Posted March 13, 2003 Share Posted March 13, 2003 When it rains it pours. For example, my design firm is working on a Guide to Health care, and yesterday was the day to focus on "safe sex." We had an impending deadline and therefore the designer, a large hairy Greek guy, decided to work along side me as we designed the layout and illustrations for the spread. The people for whom we are doing the work sent a bunch of statistics, and therefore to sort through it, I was having dictated to me out loud all kind of unsafe things that people can do or have done to themselves. It is a surreal and profoundly uncomfortable experience to have the professional sanctity of one's workspace sullied by a peer editing out loud over and over a pithy way to describe stuff that people don't talk about with close friends. The kind of stuff that makes you want to jump out of your chair and shout to the air, "You people should be ashamed of yourselves!" I got to wade through a bunch of terms like "brachioproctal manipulation" and a host of stuff I won't even hint at. (Not that there's anything wrong with that, I just don't want to hear about it right before lunch, thankyouverymuch!) I had just finished applying the psychic disinfectant of that whole experience when I walked into the cesspool to see Mace tossing his clothes about and waving his naughty bits in everyone's general direction. Where's that hopper of angry scorpions where you need it? Oh wait, it's right here. [Lurker pulls rope and a shower of angry black scorpions drop onto Mace, clinging, pinching and stinging at will] Now if anyone needs me I'll be in the fetal position under my desk. Oh, and Lady Moraine, you owe me a set-up. I realize that most of your gender feel unfettered by the the notion of timeliness, but your liege did command a contest of arms, to be followed by the bathing suit and talent competition. I have no doubt that I shall utterly crush your pixeltruppen like old grapes, but you still might win the "Miss Anthrope" title. Lurk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jim Boggs Posted March 13, 2003 Share Posted March 13, 2003 Originally posted by Berlichtingen: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Jim Boggs: You besmirch the honor of my Great StateFlorida is NOT a great state... it is a swamp Your state has no honor... it is where the young send the old when they are tired of them. Glad I could clear that up for you. Now, go away </font> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted March 13, 2003 Share Posted March 13, 2003 Originally posted by Moraine Sedai: No, dear Berli. What you missed is that he said he pretends to be oversexed, underappreciated and a pariah of society. Well, he is oversexed, but I like it, heh. He's not underappreciated NOR is he a pariah. So there. Oversexed is he... and you are in two seperate states... No, he is not underappreciated... a zero can't be and yes, he IS a pariah Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted March 13, 2003 Share Posted March 13, 2003 Originally posted by Jim Boggs: As one of the original "Ancient Ones", one would expect a clearer perception of the value provided by our Great State.I have a crystal clear perception of the value of your worthless state... and as soon as they bring back nuke testing... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yeknodathon Posted March 13, 2003 Share Posted March 13, 2003 Originally posted by Mace: Well, what can I say but the fine, lovely ladies requested it, and Mace is here to deliver..... </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />from 6 June 2001 Midnight! It?s time!!!! *spotlights turn on, casting beams of light on a the cylindrical object, revealing what is actually a MASSIVE BIRTHDAY CAKE* *Music starts up - Ta ta dum?ta ta dum?ta ta dum dum dum* *From the top of the cake jumps out?.Mace!* Happy birthday?.. *Mace removes his shoes and throws them into the cesspoolers* ?to you! *Mace removes his socks, gives them a twirl, and throws them as well* Happy birthday?.. *Removes his tie slowly, then drapes it over one of the birthday girl?s shoulders* ?to you! *Mace unbuttons his shirt, removes it, and tosses it to one side* Happy birthdaaaaAAAAAaaay?..dearest Kitty *Unbuckles his belt and drops it to the floor* Happy birthday? *drops pants, kicks them off, saunters up to the birthday girl then sits on her lap* ?toooOOOOoooo YOOOoooOOOOOOOooooooOOoooou!!! *KISS!* Happy birthday, Kitty Mace PS Do you realise how hard it is to find a good cyber stripper?Would you all be interested to hear how my thong kept creeping? Mace </font> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jim Boggs Posted March 13, 2003 Share Posted March 13, 2003 Originally posted by Berlichtingen: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Jim Boggs: As one of the original "Ancient Ones", one would expect a clearer perception of the value provided by our Great State.I have a crystal clear perception of the value of your worthless state... and as soon as they bring back nuke testing... </font> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted March 13, 2003 Share Posted March 13, 2003 Faugh! All this talk about Florida, Mace's body slathered with Vegemite as he shakes his money maker* at the masses and Moraine's desire to shampoo Hiram's back hair has left a vile stench in the air. I wish you all would take it outside. * What with the rebates Mace will undoubtably have to give to keep any kind of an audience, with any kind of luck, he'll go broke in "short" order.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jim Boggs Posted March 13, 2003 Share Posted March 13, 2003 Originally posted by Boo_Radley: Faugh! All this talk about Florida, has left a vile stench in the air. I wish you all would take it outside. "Is this the Bureau of Records?" "Yes it is" "Do you have a listing for a Boo Radley?" "We have a listing for a Gurley Radley, nicknamed Boo." "Does it say how he got his nickname?" "Apparently it was awarded to him as a tribute to his athletic abilities." "Hmmmm....Okay, thanks very much." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moraine Sedai Posted March 13, 2003 Share Posted March 13, 2003 Originally posted by Berlichtingen: Oversexed is he... and you are in two seperate states...Well, I'm working on that... No, he is not underappreciated... a zero can't beNow that's just not nice...heh and yes, he IS a pariah Ahh, he's only a pariah to you because he loves me more than he does you. You're just jealous. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gaylord Focker Posted March 13, 2003 Share Posted March 13, 2003 Originally posted by Moraine Sedai: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Berlichtingen: Oversexed is he... and you are in two seperate states...Well, I'm working on that... </font> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Papa Lazarou Posted March 13, 2003 Share Posted March 13, 2003 Puts out cigarette. Sips wine. Glances around. Thinks: 'Intriguing board...intriguing.' Scratches head. Thinks: 'Is sleep a glimpse of death?' Points skywards, burbles inanely about UFOs for precisely fourteen seconds. Quiet now. Mumbles incantations. Puts down glass. Lights cigarette. Thinks: 'I'll be back.' Closes door as he leaves for bed. In the distance the stilted sounds of ghost stories being told around the dying embers of a campfire. [ March 13, 2003, 02:45 PM: Message edited by: Papa Lazarou ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sancho Panza Posted March 13, 2003 Share Posted March 13, 2003 Originally posted by Papa Lazarou: Puts out cigarette. Sips wine. Glances around. Thinks: 'Intriguing board...intriguing.' Scratches head. Thinks: 'Is sleep a glimpse of death?' Points skywards, burbles inanely about UFOs for precisely fourteen seconds. Quiet now. Mumbles incantations. Puts down glass. Lights cigarette. Thinks: 'I'll be back.' Closes door as he leaves for bed. In the distance the stilted sounds of ghost stories being told around the dying embers of a campfire. **Thinks that the only thing keeping his pants unsoiled at this moment is the donkey's rump pressed so firmly agaist his buttocks** Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted March 13, 2003 Share Posted March 13, 2003 ...the hell??? OK, who left the damn pet door unlatched? We got SSN's/Fluffies out that wazzoo in here. Where the hell is a Grue when you need him, eh? I hold dalem responsible for this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yeknodathon Posted March 13, 2003 Share Posted March 13, 2003 Originally posted by Papa Lazarou: Thinks: 'I'll be back.' Considering all the possibilities... [does some deep considering...] [... and some light considering, in case any were missed] *sniff*... I suppose I might groan, if one could, and I can't ... not that anyone cares... "why should they care?" I say, "no, they shouldn't care at all" I say back... "oh, but he's coming back"... "well, I suppose he can make the same mistake twice", "pathetic", "yes, very pathetic" Ahem... *honk* *hooooooooooonk* *honkahonkahonkityhonkityhonnnnnnnk* *honk* Yeknod [ March 13, 2003, 03:45 PM: Message edited by: Yeknodathon ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dalem Posted March 13, 2003 Author Share Posted March 13, 2003 i AM COME TO SHOW YOU THE WAY. iN TIMES PAST WE HAVE SEEN oUTERBOARDERS WRIGGLE AND MOAN ABOUT THE FACT THAT THERE IS AN mbt. bUT NEVER HAS THE SIMPLE TITLE OF THE mbt CAUSEd PAIN OR SUFFERING JUST BY SITTING ON pAGE 1 OF THE fORUM. uNTIL NOW. fELLOW cESSWALLOWERS, i GIVE YOU THE PAIN OF INNOCENTS. hEED MY EXAMPLE AND SEEK ALWAYS TO DO LIKEWISE. [ March 13, 2003, 04:22 PM: Message edited by: dalem ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patchy Posted March 13, 2003 Share Posted March 13, 2003 Originally posted by Mace: Well, what can I say but the fine, lovely ladies requested it, and Mace is here to deliver..... </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />from 6 June 2001 Midnight! It’s time!!!! *spotlights turn on, casting beams of light on a the cylindrical object, revealing what is actually a MASSIVE BIRTHDAY CAKE* *Music starts up - Ta ta dum…ta ta dum…ta ta dum dum dum* *From the top of the cake jumps out….Mace!* Happy birthday….. *Mace removes his shoes and throws them into the cesspoolers* …to you! *Mace removes his socks, gives them a twirl, and throws them as well* Happy birthday….. *Removes his tie slowly, then drapes it over one of the birthday girl’s shoulders* …to you! *Mace unbuttons his shirt, removes it, and tosses it to one side* Happy birthdaaaaAAAAAaaay…..dearest Kitty *Unbuckles his belt and drops it to the floor* Happy birthday… *drops pants, kicks them off, saunters up to the birthday girl then sits on her lap* …toooOOOOoooo YOOOoooOOOOOOOooooooOOoooou!!! *KISS!* Happy birthday, Kitty Mace PS Do you realise how hard it is to find a good cyber stripper?Would you all be interested to hear how my thong kept creeping? Mace </font> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patchy Posted March 13, 2003 Share Posted March 13, 2003 Originally posted by Yeknodathon: Ahem... *honk* *hooooooooooonk* *honkahonkahonkityhonkityhonnnnnnnk* *honk* Beep Beep! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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