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Originally posted by Croda:

...Fishing Pole.

'Woot!' Mace hollered. 'You thought I was Mace? You should be able to tell by the girth of my fishing pole that I am truly the great Ron Jeremy. Let me show you how I...

...can infiltrate the pool by disguising myself as that marvellous Macey fellow!'

The real Mace promptly pulled out his sheep shears and lunged at Ron Jeremy, with one snip removing the only thing that Ron was well reknown for.

'There ya go, mate!' exclaimed Mace victoriously, 'Let's see how well you get on without your...

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Originally posted by Mace:

...can infiltrate the pool by disguising myself as that marvellous Macey fellow!'

The real Mace promptly pulled out his sheep shears and lunged at Ron Jeremy, with one snip removing the only thing that Ron was well reknown for.

'There ya go, mate!' exclaimed Mace victoriously, 'Let's see how well you get on without your...

...fishing tackle.'

Just then, 'Ron' pulled off a rubber mask to reveal a bald-headed webmaster bearing a devilish grin.

'I'd have gotten away with it too, if it weren't for you meddling kids!' he shouted. With that, he hopped on his...

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Colorado. Official state motto: "We may not have air up in the mountains, but at least we've got...

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Well my skiff's a twenty dollar boat, And I hope to God she stays afloat.

But if somehow my skiff goes down, I'll freeze to death before I drown.

And pray my body will be found, Alaska salmon fishing, boys, Alaska salmon fishing.

The Last Defense- Mods, Scenarios, and more!

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Originally posted by Waxx_IK:

...bald men riding broomsticks! After a brief stop in Colorado to go to the bathroom, Matt headed for...

...the local Antarctican bar. There, he broke up a ruckus between two pinguins fighting over a fish.

"Those penguins" scoffed Matt, wiping his hands free of penguin blood and small intestines, "they never..."

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Originally posted by The Commissar:

"Those penguins" scoffed Matt, wiping his hands free of penguin blood and small intestines, "they never..."

...put out"!

While Matt did enjoy bouncing the odd head off the wall every now and then, this his tried and true method of crowd control, the real reason he returned to this occupation was to pick up on the...

[This message has been edited by Mace (edited 02-27-2001).]

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Guest Lord General MB

Soldier,

....Hot Penguin chicks who hung out at Colorado bars. One day Matt slid up to the bar and leaned his great bald head over the counter. There to his surprise he found the most discusting thing he had ever seen.....

------------------

Salute!

Lord General Mr. Bill

Supreme Commander

1st Army

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Originally posted by Lord General MB:

Soldier,

....Hot Penguin chicks who hung out at Colorado bars. One day Matt slid up to the bar and leaned his great bald head over the counter. There to his surprise he found the most discusting thing he had ever seen.....

...which was none other then a bastard who wrote "Soldier" in front of every messege.

Matt: You suck.

Lord-guy: Leave me alone, mister! The light reflectring off your skull is blinding me!

Matt: You cannot survive make your time.

Lord-guy: What you say!!! No really, I'm short of hearing!!!

Matt: NO ONE USES AS MUCH EXCLAMATION POINTS AS I DO!!! FOR THIS YOU WILL...

[This message has been edited by The Commissar (edited 02-27-2001).]

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Food poisoning at a college cafeteria. Now why don't you have the boiled...

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Well my skiff's a twenty dollar boat, And I hope to God she stays afloat.

But if somehow my skiff goes down, I'll freeze to death before I drown.

And pray my body will be found, Alaska salmon fishing, boys, Alaska salmon fishing.

The Last Defense- Mods, Scenarios, and more!

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Guest Lord General MB

Sir,

...Cesspool goo. It taste for some reason like Peng's hair gell, and Sheep hair. Very odd. Now let me tell you a story about long ago, when the Cess was young. There was man named Peng and a man named Senachi (GDI get a better name).....

------------------

Salute!

Lord General Mr. Bill

Supreme Commander

1st Army

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Originally posted by jd:

or was it Sasquatch, or senility, or Sesspit, oh shoot said Lord Bill, I get so confused on days when I forget to take my....

...sausages. Mmm-mmm, sausages. Wish I had some now... no really, I do!

Stop looking at me like that.

Stop it.

STOP IT!

I'll poke your eyes out you little freak!

OK, that's the last straw! Honey - fetch me my...

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Originally posted by Lord General MB:

Sheep hair

***********************************

We interrupt this thread to bring you an important notice!

It's called WOOL, ya nong!!!

Normal services will now be resumed.

Thankyou

***********************************

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Originally posted by Mace:

***********************************

It's called WOOL, ya nong!!!

But whatever it was called, Mace had some stuck between his...

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Well my skiff's a twenty dollar boat, And I hope to God she stays afloat.

But if somehow my skiff goes down, I'll freeze to death before I drown.

And pray my body will be found, Alaska salmon fishing, boys, Alaska salmon fishing.

The Last Defense- Mods, Scenarios, and more!

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Originally posted by Mannheim Tanker:

...sneaked up behind him and...

...taking Gustav by his long, girlish hair flung him off the boat into the cold Alaskan water, where he proceeded to immediately get impotence thanks to the below zero temperature.

"The commi guy says you're even now" one of the penguins skwaked. "By the way, no hard feelings or nufink, pal. The bucket of tuna he gave us was an offer we couldnt refuse. Anyhow..."

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Guest Lord General MB

Soldiers,

....We need are payment. Said the penguins, And so the great bald one procceded to regegate a whole bucket of fish heads. There yah go you little hot penguin chicks, and he got back on his broom stick and....

------------------

Salute!

Lord General Mr. Bill

Supreme Commander

1st Army

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...as he flew away he threw a book down at the feet of that Lord-General Milton Bradley Guy. It was a dictionary!

"Learn to spell, you illiterate marshmallow!" the Penguin taunted as he broomed out of sight. "And another thing. Keep your hands off of my ...

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Karokae versions of various Jimmy Buffet songs. Exactly how much did you have to drink that night, you...

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Well my skiff's a twenty dollar boat, And I hope to God she stays afloat.

But if somehow my skiff goes down, I'll freeze to death before I drown.

And pray my body will be found, Alaska salmon fishing, boys, Alaska salmon fishing.

The Last Defense- Mods, Scenarios, and more!

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