Peng, I Am Still Taking Our Bloody Challenge Public

Croda · October 30, 2000

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>Originally posted by jshandorffffff:

Croda: You've lost. It is now just a matter of how badly you want to be beaten.

Ok, so what is the noble thing to do here? My center has been smashed so that I have weak resistance on the left and the right, while he has a great deal of stregth in the middle. My Elite mofo's will certainly take the last nine turns to kill off entirely, yet haven't the oomph to be anything more than annoying. My gut says to keep up the fight and go down swinging, what says the pool? (PawBroon, take notice of the answer here. You will find it quite pertinent after the next turn).

------------------

"Nuts!"

Seanachai · October 30, 2000

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>Originally posted by Mark IV:

Here I am, back after 3 horrid weeks, and the Pool has become the Scrota-Shandork chat room, and has nearly fallen off page 1 (cause? effect?). A bunch of squirey newfs and no-name spit-mongers have supplanted the truly vile denizens of my beloved cistern, and a sad thing it is.

I've some catching up to do, but let's hope there was something more worthwhile than the last couple pages. Can't turn my back for a minute...<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Caught up yet? We could use a hand with some of these people; Peng's out even now having functional reproductions of the original Meeks Brick priced (we don't want to defile the original with some of the brain-matter turning up here).

Also, where is Shaw? Is he still maintaining this fiction that he's having some kind of ISP problem, or is he going to get access to the Correctional Institute's public internet connection long enough to admit that the state of Utah has had him jailed for defaming Brigham Young's wives?

And Goanna? Just because he's antipodal doesn't mean he has to be antisocial. Is he off in some hell hole doing business things? Did he mumble something about Oman, or was I mistaken and it was some disturbing reference to Onan?

And what about the GITwinS, Tom & Jim? I can't even remember the last time we had any kind of accounting report from Tom. Where are we with the budget, Peng will need to know how many bricks we can afford...

------------------

After witnessing exceptional bravery from his Celtic mercenaries, Alexander the Great called them to him and asked if there was anything they feared. They told him nothing, except that the sky might fall on their heads.

[This message has been edited by Seanachai (edited 10-30-2000).]

Seanachai · October 30, 2000

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>Originally posted by YK2:

God,that was sooooooo funny, pure genius, BRAVO. I have copied those lyrics, and will pass them out to all to sing on New years Eve (accompanied by the bagpipes of course)

Made me feel quite homesick (sob, sob)

Can we have some more pleaseeeeeee.

Of course. I knew that the sing-songs would catch on eventually!

While most gratifying to have my mentally disturbed efforts approved, which says much for your wit and intelligence, I'm still going to have to club you into submission with a 2x4 in our PBEM. Not only do I enjoy such things, but it's only fair to the other lads, and my supremacy over all (except, of course, for having Lost to Peng. And yes, I also lost to Meeks, but that doesn't count, because when I began the battle I thought Meeks was just shamming insanity. Now I know better.). And, it's true I did lose to Mark IV...a couple of times, but that's just because he's good. Oh, and Geier, but that's because he's corrupt and has contacts. Okay, my supremacy is seriously in question, but I'm still going to kick the ****e out of you, YK2, so just brace yourself (slinks off snarling and sulking).

------------------

After witnessing exceptional bravery from his Celtic mercenaries, Alexander the Great called them to him and asked if there was anything they feared. They told him nothing, except that the sky might fall on their heads.

Chupacabra · October 30, 2000

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>Originally posted by Croda:

My gut says to keep up the fight and go down swinging, what says the pool?

Which would be more annoying for your opponent? Do that.

------------------

Soy super bien, soy super super bien, soy bien bien super bien bien bien super super.

mensch · October 30, 2000

croda.. surrender and while your at it surrender in our pbem.. no chance no fear.. all prisoners will be treated well.. only force to watch soobydoo re-runs..

Hamstersss · October 30, 2000

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>Originally posted by Croda:

Ok, so what is the noble thing to do here? My center has been smashed so that I have weak resistance on the left and the right, while he has a great deal of stregth in the middle. My Elite mofo's will certainly take the last nine turns to kill off entirely, yet haven't the oomph to be anything more than annoying. My gut says to keep up the fight and go down swinging, what says the pool? (PawBroon, take notice of the answer here. You will find it quite pertinent after the next turn).

You must never surrender! Fight him on the beaches, fight him in the countryside fight him at the amusement park, at every Taco Bell and Marriot Inn! Yes, every square inch of soil must be paid for in blood!

And think about it, I got so pissed at Shandorf's luck that I surrendered on turn 2, giving him a Major (Or even Total) Victory when, if I'd actually played, I would have smeared the little guy. If you surrender, you give him more to gloat about. Otherwise, you know CM is so accurate that they've modeled VE-Day and there is a .00001% chance that any game at any time will end and the screen will state "That's it, wars over, everybody go home." leaving neither side with a victory. For god's sake, man, do it for the children!

Andreas, is this a surrender file I hold? You couldn't even withdraw? I must say, the immovable object that is my defense has stopped cold the very resistable force that was Andreas's attack.

Jefe, surrender now for what looks like an entire company is caught in the open and is about to be mowed down by a Faustian display of firepower. I see no one has read the sequel, where Faust gets together a scrappy group of mercenaries and a small arsenal and sets forth to take his soul from the Devil's cold, dead fingers. Come on, you remember when Faust says, "I've only got two questions for you, Asmodeus. One, how did a prick like you become the supreme lord of the afterlife and two, how do you plan on taking my immortal soul when I tear off both your thumbs?

No one has stepped forward to offer their services in placing troops on a map for the Pawbroon/Meeks Battle for Supreme Insanity. I can only assume that it is because everyone skips my posts because every one of you, excepting that git Foobar, weeps unbcontrollably when they read my AARs.

Finally there is Berli. I feel the same way about Berli as I do about Bill Gates, in that I do not want to piss him off given that he could squash me like a pinata. I need to say, however, that I have been very clear about my recent deletion (eg Cleaning) of my PBEMs in my PBEM folder. I had thought I'd responded to everyone but it turns out I responded to no one. So Berli, if you could be so kind as to resend the last file, I will be happy to continue fighting you. If, however, you would rather declare me the winner and omnipotent master of Tunisia, we can start a new game.

Peng and I are fighting for a laughably placed VL. Let's just say that if we fought in the middle of a crater, with all troops starting on the rim and no protection at the base (Which, of course, is where the VL would be) we would have a marginally better time of it.

Hey Croda, if you keep advancing so slowly (Except for the Scout StuG, which I loved), two things will happen:

1. The game will end with me still in control of the VLs and your pathetic life.

2. I will not be able to unmercifully slaughter your troops.

Yes, I did say finally and then added some **** after, so bite me.

------------------

I've got far more annoying things than that up my sleeve.

-Meeks

You must wear awfully loose shirts to fit an oompah band up your sleeve.

-Chrisl

jshandorf · October 30, 2000

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>Originally posted by Chup-Chup-pa-doop-Chup-pa-doop-Chup-pa-doop-pa-doop-pa:

Which would be more annoying for your opponent? Do that.

You fool! Don't encourage him! As corrupted and twisted as his meaningless little soul is you certainly don't need to help him.

I long for my return home, so that I can see what hell hath brought in my name to your troops.

AND CRODA!

What the hell is this talk about "the honorable thing to do" in the pool! This is no place for honor. Honor is found on the bottom of the pool with all the other slime and meeks..uh i mean muck.

Jeff

[This message has been edited by jshandorf (edited 10-30-2000).]

Croda · October 30, 2000

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>Originally posted by Elijah Meeks:

No one has stepped forward to offer their services in placing troops on a map for the Pawbroon/Meeks Battle for Supreme Insanity. I can only assume that it is because everyone skips my posts because every one of you, excepting that git Foobar, weeps unbcontrollably when they read my AARs.

(stepping forward) I'll give you troops the likes of which you wished never existed (and probably didn't). you let me know what you want me to do.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>

Hey Croda, if you keep advancing so slowly (Except for the Scout StuG, which I loved), two things will happen:

1. The game will end with me still in control of the VLs and your pathetic life.

2. I will not be able to unmercifully slaughter your troops.

Ya, the scout Stug was imprudent, to say the least. But slowly? (yes, I did start a sentence with 'but') I almost hold the northern VL. Are you sleeping or did you 'accidently' delete that file too? I have a boatload of tenacity coming straight for you. I'm going to cut the tendons from your fingers and sell them to Berli. I don't know what he does with them, but he offered me a good price for them, so I'm all for it. You will notice droopy fingers on the scout squads you sent to be slaughtered, and there are many more droopy fingers to follow!

------------------

"Nuts!"

[This message has been edited by Croda (edited 10-30-2000).]

Chupacabra · October 30, 2000

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>Originally posted by Croda:

But slowly? (yes, I did start a sentence with 'but') <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Only if they call that mangled hack of a phrase a sentence in whatever Podunk grade school you went to, sonny. In my day, they called that an adverb, not a sentence.

------------------

Soy super bien, soy super super bien, soy bien bien super bien bien bien super super.

Croda · October 30, 2000

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>Originally posted by jshandorf:

AND CRODA!

What the hell is this talk about "the honorable thing to do" in the pool! This is no place for honor. Honor is found on the bottom of the pool with all the other slime and meeks..uh i mean muck.

Well, Jeffy, I was just thinking out load, really. Trying to decide whether or not to throw in the towel. I've got 1.3 platoons left, to what I would estimate as a conglomerate equal to roughly 2 companies, plus 4 HTs and a Stug. It looks pretty bad, but I'm not sure that I should defile the memory of the men who gave their ELITE lives guarding this ground and sanctifying it with their vital essence, by having these last few men throw in the towel and walk off the field like French-men. Imagine this, so, Grampy, what did you do in the war? Well, grandson of mine, I watched my brethren die in defense of a meaningless group of grey flags, and then when things looked really bad, I quit because there was no way in hell that I was going to die out there too.

No, no. Not in my Army. In my Army that little boy will never be born because his gramps is a tough muther-bucker, and he's gonna die with his countrymen on the field of battle! So you can take your surrender and shove it up ChupaMonkey's ass! You want my answer? Take a good long look at my signature, buddy boy! You want a fight? You came to the right place! To the last man!

------------------

"Nuts!"

[This message has been edited by Croda (edited 10-30-2000).]

October 30, 2000

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>Originally posted by Elijah Meeks:

Andreas, is this a surrender file I hold? You couldn't even withdraw? I must say, the immovable object that is my defense has stopped cold the very resistable force that was Andreas's attack.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Why yes it is - how difficult can it be o read 'Allies surrender - Axis total victory'? The standards in Silicon Valley must be low these days. Maybe have your secretary read it to you at some point.

Withdrawal is pointless (no pun intended). Tried it once, result was still the same, except for that both players lost an awful lot of time exchanging files with nothing happening.

------------------

Andreas

<a href="http://www.geocities.com/greg_mudry/sturm.html">Der Kessel</a >

Home of „Die Sturmgruppe“; Scenario Design Group for Combat Mission.

[This message has been edited by Germanboy (edited 10-30-2000).]

Herr Oberst · October 30, 2000

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>Originally posted by Croda:

... My gut says to keep up the fight and go down swinging, what says the pool? ...

You need only look at my surrender to Meeks to know my opinion on this matter:

A responsible commander will save the lives of his men when it is known that the final answer of the issue is resolved...

And immediately start a new battle where he might fare better...

------------------

To the last I grapple with thee; from hell's heart I stab at thee; for hate's sake I spit my last breath at thee...

Hamstersss · October 30, 2000

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>Originally posted by Germanboy:

Why yes it is - how difficult can it be o read 'Allies surrender - Axis total victory'? The standards in Silicon Valley must be low these days. Maybe have your secretary read it to you at some point.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

You rat ninny, I'm not in front of my computer and only realized that the E-mail was your surrender when you publicly stated it here.

Lorak!!! Where are you Lorak!?

Andreas: Loss (Terrible, ugly loss)

Meeks: Victory, again. Gah! Won't someone, other than Foobar the meaningless who doesn't even post here any more, defeat me!

I want a vote! Who here thinks Andreas should have thrown his men at me like the cold-blooded bastard we all know he is?

------------------

I've got far more annoying things than that up my sleeve.

-Meeks

You must wear awfully loose shirts to fit an oompah band up your sleeve.

-Chrisl

Croda · October 30, 2000

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>Originally posted by Elijah Meeks:

You rat ninny, I'm not in front of my computer... <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I really don't give a flying squirrel, but if you're not in front of your computer then how the hades are you posting here? Your email is a work email, I assume the bulk of your CMing is done at home...are you dodging ScaryGermanGuy's Surrender?

And as a side note, seeing as I don't believe I have a file from you, I'm guessing that I got deleted. I'll resend the latest turn, you pathetic waste of good ATP.

------------------

"Nuts!"

[This message has been edited by Croda (edited 10-30-2000).]

jshandorf · October 30, 2000

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>Originally posted by Elijah Meeks:

Won't someone, other than Foobar the meaningless who doesn't even post here any more, defeat me!

I did, Meeks. 99 to 1. Don't you remember? You surrendered after two turns. Any of this ringing a bell in that dark and empty space that occupies the vacuum between your ears?

Jeff

Hamstersss · October 31, 2000

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>Originally posted by jshandorf:

Ooooo, look at me! I beat you once when I got lucky and you were too drunk and too pissed to do anything but surrender. I take credit for a total victory! Ooooo, I'm special!!

Jefe<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I have no words left for you. I have acknowledged this blotch on my record. I feel that only my mastery of you will make up for it, which I appear to be quite capable of continuing. However, in my current crop of games I am beating you and everyone else into the dust.

As to Croda's little, "I practically own a VL all ready!" I have no words left to describe you, either. Your men are going to die so horribly and, more importantly, you know you are going to lose. You have never beaten me Croda, you aren't beating me now and you will never beat me in the future.

Ahem, Muahahahahaahahahahahha!!!

Send me a file, Berli!!!!!

------------------

I've got far more annoying things than that up my sleeve.

-Meeks

You must wear awfully loose shirts to fit an oompah band up your sleeve.

-Chrisl

October 31, 2000

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>Originally posted by Elijah Meeks:

I want a vote! Who here thinks Andreas should have thrown his men at me like the cold-blooded bastard we all know he is?

And as I told you in my email, I will be happy to do that, but I am under no delusions as to what will happen and therefore I would rather surrender before my men are turned to a bloody pulp.

So it does not need a bloody vote you analphabetic, iconoclastic cretin. All it needs is for you to say so. So once you get your head out from in between the significant assets of your secretary (I guess you do that to distract yourself while she is reading your emails to you, otherwise you would not miss the obvious all the time) you can just bloody well say so and I shall happily oblige and lead my men like lambs to the slaughter. They won't complain, they are English.

------------------

Andreas

<a href="http://www.geocities.com/greg_mudry/sturm.html">Der Kessel</a >

Home of „Die Sturmgruppe“; Scenario Design Group for Combat Mission.

[This message has been edited by Germanboy (edited 10-30-2000).]

Mark IV · October 31, 2000

If Meeks actually has a job, why can't it prevent him from posting slanderous, uneducated drivel about George Custer while the rest of us are trying to work?

What sort of job permits you time to post, but not to research?

Admit you get your ACW information from the back of a Wheaties box, and you'll hear no more of this matter from me. Persist in your delusional comic-book notions, and expect the Brick of Knowledge upside your steeply-sloped cranium. And stop bothering the Very Serious Posters outside of this thread.

As for the rest of you, I got drunk instead of looking for your turns yesterday. Bummer. I deserved it. You will too.

jshandorf · October 31, 2000

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>Originally posted by Elijah Meeks:

However, in my current crop of games I am beating you and everyone else into the dust.

Beating me into the dust, you say? Ohh pleeeeease. I think anybody that has played Meeks realizes that when he is on the defensive you literally have to walk your men over his before he will expose them and then exclaim about his "perfect ambush".

Yeah.. When I have to go traipsing around the map for turns on end trying to scare up your pathetic little men I AM gonna take some casualties in the process.

Our battle has just began. So climb off the fence post and quit making noise you bloated cock. (As in the chicken....*sigh*)

As to your lose to me.. "It was the booze! I tell ya! The BOOOOZE made me do it! I just couldn't stop my right arm from lifting to my mouth. It MADE me drink! And then ya know.. It made me send a map to Shandorf and challenge him. Yeah.. And then when I did my orders it made me do stupid things with my armor and infantry so that they died in mass in the first 2 turns. It's not my fault. I am not incompetent. Noooo! No more beer...(Gurgle...Gulp...Gasp) It's making me drink again and post! Help meeeeeeeeee....)

I suppose it would explain ALOT of things.

Jeff

Lorak · October 31, 2000

Ah,

Greetings. The kind people from from my cable company finally decided to come out and install my new Cable Modem (it kicks ass!)

So now I am back on-line at home, and you fellows can continue to kick my ass.

I believe I managed to get all my turns sent out today before I left home. If I missed someone just let me know.

New address is Lmcgarvey@triad.rr.com (it is in the profile also).

Also updated the win loss records.

This is what I had.

Moriarty-loss

Oberst-loss

Seanachai-loss

chrisl-loss

jdmorse-win

pawbroon-win

germanboy- 1/1/2

Meeks- 4 wins

TTFN

Lorak the loathed.

------------------

"Do not wait to strike till the iron is hot; but make it hot by striking."--William Butler Yeats

Cesspool

Chupacabra · October 31, 2000

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>Originally posted by Lorak:

Also updated the win loss records.

This is what I had.

Lorak! You have 'conveniently' ignored my draw with Dr. Alimantado, no doubt to further some sort of wicked scheme of your own. I've got my eyes on you, mister....

------------------

Soy super bien, soy super super bien, soy bien bien super bien bien bien super super.

Hamstersss · October 31, 2000

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>Originally posted by Mark IV:

I love Custer because he's blond.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Love a real general, like Sherman or, god forbid, Sheridan. Custer was a fop, we all know it, regardless of the revisionist history perpetrated by you Yankee oppressors. Frankly, I find your love of the North and your use of a Nazi weapon as a moniker a bit suspicious. You like the jack-booted oppressors, don't you? Well, well, now it all becomes clear. Scrappy underdogs aren't for you, eh MarkIV? You make me sick. Sick!

Keep working for the clampdown MarkIV, because in Appendix B of the Cesspool it says:

MarkIV: First one up against the wall when the revolution comes.

------------------

I've got far more annoying things than that up my sleeve.

-Meeks

You must wear awfully loose shirts to fit an oompah band up your sleeve.

-Chrisl

bauhaus · October 31, 2000

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:<HR>Originally posted by Seanachai:

Peng? PENG! MAKE SOME NOISE, SON, ARE YOU OUT THERE?!

Woof, woof, arf, arf!!

What's that, Elvis? Peng is trapped in the abandoned mine, and needs ale and emergency medical treatment? Good job, boy! I'm off to the package store for a 12, and I'll pick up a copy of 'Worst Case Scenarios' on the way. Here's a biscuit, now go lift your leg on Bauhaus; the nasty little animal is doing altogether too well in our PBEM.

What kind of world is it where I beat Berli and Moriarity, and then lose to Bauhaus? What is this, Saturnalia?

Now we know who the king of the Herald is!!!!!

PeterNZer · October 31, 2000

It's a squire's time to claim wot's his. So you, Lorak listen up!

I have a draw against Germy. It was a training session, not sure if it countrs.

A win against JD Morse. Sorry patron sir, knight sir sir.. but I kicked your little sir booty sir like you were some portable inflatable backside. I'll try not to do it again sir.

And the rest of you. Well, too many games to reccount. Mostly it involves some shooty stuff, some boomy stuff. All very lovely and pleasing.

PeterNZ

Lorak · October 31, 2000

Ok Peter, Records are added.

Chupacabra,

I know that living in England has messed you mind up. That is understandable. But let me help explain things to you. The "cesspool battle results" are just that. Battle results against people in the cesspool. Since Dr Alimantado in neither a squire nor a knight, Your result against him is void.

Lorak the loathed

------------------

"Do not wait to strike till the iron is hot; but make it hot by striking."--William Butler Yeats

Cesspool

Peng, I Am Still Taking Our Bloody Challenge Public

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