Soddball

Mr Green and I spent a couple of turns trading AP rounds to no avail - at 300m my lone T-34 had 94,291 ricochets off Mr Green's Panzer IIIs. He got a partial turret penetration which distressed the tank commander no end - so much so that we had to scrape the worst bits off the gunsight so we could continue firing. However, he has now lost a Panzer III and a 20mm halftrack, and his remaining tanks are outflanked and inconvenienced, although they still outnumber me by lots to few. Mr Green has taken all the flags so far with his infantry, and is about to find out what BIG artillery means to men hiding in woods.

Whut the hail is this doing on page 2??

What grass mod is he using? BTW, the front upper hull armour slope is out by 4.41 degrees.

The day I need a do-over turn from you, you sad weasel-beating wanker, is the day I need my head examined through being a remedial ****wit. What turn was it?

It wasn't a double post. Honest. [ March 13, 2003, 04:45 PM: Message edited by: Soddball ]

Well, GoatFondler, you owe me a turn. It's that little gem of a turn, the one you really, really didn't want to see. You see, ladies and gentlemen, Goodale is having his arse handed to him. I have, quite literally, removed his arse from his body and am returning it to him in pieces. Current tally: 2 T-34s turned to mush. 1 SU-152, busted at 300m by a light AT gun through the lower hull armour - ouch. 2 MG carriers, both turned into frying hulks by another light AT gun. My losses - a halftrack. Oooh, the pain. Honest, guv. Come on, Goodale. I haven't even fisted your infantry much yet - apart from that SMG platoon which ran across the open ground right in front of a dug-in veteran HMG-42 - but they won't be going anywhere in a hurry. In other news: Mike the Whiner has lost a Panther to the loving caress of an SU-85 and a fighter-bomber in our Becket-induced scenario. My SU-85 proved its suckage value. I am demolishing chunks of city in a major real-estate deal. Jussi Kohler is staggering to the end of Inferno with me. Yeesh. I had no idea it was this unpleasant. What a great scenario.

Well, that's very silly of you. Read the last page of the thread linked to above and you'll see an in-game workaround - targetting the top of the hill.

There is a technical support forum for just this kind of question.

There is a technical support forum for just this kind of question.

Anything involving more than 12 flamethrowers on a small map. Steve </font>

Pig-fellating monkey butlers. My turns have all gone back out. I am winning everything. Wictory is but a whore's pantyliner away.

"T" in the title stands for "Tournament Saved". The final release will, obviously, just be called "Inferno" - named in part after the result of 35 minutes of flamethrower combat, and in part after the famous "Inferno" scene in the BBC comedy "Coupling".

All my hot uberloving turns have gone out this morning. Get to it, maggots! :mad: :mad: Edited to add: Whoever it was that wanted a new scenario of horror and pain, drop me a line. I have a little gem that's finished and ready for playtesting. [ March 12, 2003, 04:33 AM: Message edited by: Soddball ]

Still nursing your wounds lickspittle? Or have yon dreams of another match waned? Rematch proposed and accepted. Terms to be decided. Have at ye, scoundrel. :mad: BeoWolf if you really want a go at it, Soddball is but days away from a new scenario. And we all know what they say about a Soddball Scenarios ..."You haven't lived until you have played one and then you want to light your house on fire, gouge out your eyes, and disembowel yourself to ensure no molecule of yourself remains intact.". Ah, good times, good times indeed. </font>

Schoolgirl uniforms will do fine, not nurse's uniforms though. They bring back too many memories.

Bumpadiddlyo.

Teddy and I are still trading blows in our Panzer vs T-34 scrap - where both sides are merrily bouncing rounds off each other's front turrets and upper hulls at 250m. Very frustrating, but I have now retreated after being "partial penetrated".

*yawn* My TNT has chilled to the point of boredom waiting for your slack turn-delivering skills to pull themselves together. Ye gods, you can put 30 posts a day on the board but can't find the time to send me a turn? I've eaten knockwurst that were less revolting than you.

Hmm. So should I remove the humour from the FAQ or just put a warning on the Peng Thread section saying "If you have a sense of humour, it will be surgically removed by your very entry into the pit of inane depravity that is the Peng Threads". I'm just worried that would encourage people. You know the type, the ones that stand and watch the car accidents.

Alternatively, if you had visited the FAQ thread, the answer to your question is there in black and green. n00b.

Hmm - I have a night-time nightmare ready to go, but nothing finished which is daylight-based - at least, for the next week or two.

I think this is a good time for a fire drill.......*runs for the door*. </font>

Master Goodale's post, edited for clarity. You seem to be sicker than Johnny McSick. If you spent less time licking your own sphincter, you might be healthier. How are those tanks coming on? I feel the urge to barbecue.

All my turns have gone out this morning. I am back in the 'CM Zone' after having a loony few days. Early next week will also suck in terms of getting any gaming done, but I shall continue to try. MostlyGangBanged has lost yet more tanks in his "Slaughter the Camping Germans" QB. My anti-tank guns have now picked off 3 of his T-34s with little effort, although they are becoming a little distressed at the SU-152 type molten TNT being chucked in their direction. Luckily, they are in groovy 'hull down behind a hill' positions. Jussi Kohler and I are continuing to mash each other in my Inferno scenario. Yuck. This turn has cost him a pair of light tanks and an SU-76, dealt with harshly by a Panzer III, an infantry gun (HE round in the arse) and a Brummbar respectively. MikeT and I are continuing to beat each other up on our infantry-only scenario, where machine guns and mortars are making life unhappy for everyone. Groovy fun.

Dissapointing when the upper hull should be impossible (as in this example) to hit. Oh well, have to wait for the rewrite I guess. </font>