Seanachai

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Berlichtingen: I do so hate poking holes in your logic (Hell, its hard to do with all the holes that already exist), but the establishment of Knighthoods came long after the original MBTAIWABT<hr></blockquote> Damn good point, Berli, and Shaw should have known that.

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Slapdragon: Roll theme music fade in title on slug --Tales of the Magenta Onion-- music under voice over: "They lived on an Island Paradise a thousand miles from the outside world."<hr></blockquote> What the hell is wrong with you?! Is this some kind of sick play on a Donovan song? That's it, you pillock, I'm off to the Peng Challenge Thread to challenge your worthless arse. You apparently have too much time on your hands.

Now, not to disparage you excessively, but to make a serious point, the units you are describing are called 'clerics' and they're found in RPGs. Within the scope of CM, they have no useful purpose. Just like in war, people die, are wounded, and are of no consequence in the accountancy of combat other than as a debit. They may figure into the balance sheet of strategy, but they mean nothing in a tactical battle, whether it last 20 minutes, or 3 days. Consider the scope of the game.

Well, but here, you evil spoken and evil smelling lot, the whole Seniour Knight thing was determined on a purely mechanistic basis in the earlier days of the Peng Challenge Thread, when there was much squabbling and unseemly behaviour. Now, just as any Order, Society, or Pantheon evolves and advances, so the Peng Challenge Thread moves forward. The only thing frozen into amber, at this point, is the Olde Ones, and that doesn't come out of any sort of heirarchical obsession, so much as Universal Mystery and Archetype. Mind, if any of you were paying attention, the Mystical Three of the Olde Ones have, over time, been matched by a Mystical Three of Goddesses, namely Yk2, Kitty, and Patch. The fair Emma inspires me, the calm and gentle Persephone mitigates the excesses of Berli, and...well, oddly we pair up Kitty and Peng because each hates the other, apparently. There's one in every crowd. Now, as for the status of Seniour Knight: I don't believe this was ever intended to be a status that you were either born with, or would be forever denied...ah, gods, Ossian's doing a rather beautiful Gaelic ballad just now...now that's music... As I was saying, even the title of Seniour Knight must evolve. Otherwise, frankly, when the current crop of pillocks kacks, there will be no one to teach the children about the Peng Challenge Thread, except the Olde Ones. And frankly, Peng frightens children, Berli can't be left around them with matches, and I simply can't do it alone. So, as time passes, it only stands to reason and common sense usage, that long-time posters, found to be of value to the Thread, and useless for anything else in the Universe, will come to be Seniour Knights. They will, of course, be raised by the acclaim of their fellows, and by their contributions to the Peng Challenge Thread, and by the solemn nod of the Olde Ones. Oh, and sometimes just because we Olde Ones bloody well say it's so. Actually, that's mainly when it will occur. Most of you can't be trusted with a pack of burnt out matches, why should we believe you've paid enough attention to the Mother Beautiful Thread to notice who's reached the threshold of being a Seniour Knight? Pillocks.

Berli, and the Justicar. AussieJeff, it looks poorly, when these two unite. What say you, lad? What sayest Peng? What sayest the Eldest of Australians, Goanna? How speakest the Law, JD Morse and Lawyer? What say the Australians? And Hiram's Ghost: what from the First amongst the Most Self-Effacing? And the Ladies of the Pool, what sayest thou, YK2, Persephone, and Kitty? And what say the French? And, Geier, what of the 'Old Firm'?

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Berlichtingen: By unanimous vote of all current posting members who have achieved rank of serf or better. Should the vote carry, the unfortunate will be as though they do not exist. Their posts unread and not responded to. Cast out from heaven and Hell to wander unwanted and lonely for eternity!<hr></blockquote> Unanimous vote?! Jesus Christ, I could barely get a unanimous vote on the Mother Beautiful Thread to deny Shaw being elected Queen of the May. What you're saying to me, is, if we can get every currently sober, conscious, and competent member of the Mother Beautiful Thread to decide some useless f'ing pillock is a useless f'ing pillock, then they are cast out. That could take weeks. And even then there's going to be a hefty chunck of debate, not to mention sobering up, confusion, and the normal sheer idiocy.

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Berlichtingen: Seanachai! I say NAY to your call to raise FlossieJeff to serf! Rally forth good knights and join me in defying Seanachai on this! Who among you will also say nay?<hr></blockquote> I do no more than my duty, and take responsibility for my Quest to 'Crush All Australians'. Berli says nay. He calls upon all Seniour Knights to vote their conscience, and deny AussieJeff. I ask one amongst you to look upon this utterly useless puddle of wombat piss known as 'AussieJeff', and see the poster that might be. See the potential for...er, well, yet another annoying Australian member, and say 'Yes'. AussieJeff, if there was ever a moment for a last ditch, impassioned, and most especially, 'semi-intelligent' plea, now is the time. Post large, lad. Try to make me not want to throw-up.

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Berlichtingen: Seanachai, I am not suprised to see you have missed the point (a point other than that at the top of your little red hat). An SSN is a new comer to our auspicious thread. Nothing more, nothing less. Being an SSN implies a clean slate... neither a gem nor a lump of ****e. To be elevated to serf implies a certain level of acceptance and the potential of a rough gem. Should some knight feel the desire, he may take this uncut stone as squire to chip away the rough spots so that they may someday shine with the glory of knighthood. A SUP (yep, I do prefer that to FUP), on the otherhand, is one who has proven themselves unworthy of our company. It is a title that should not be given lightly as it means they are cast out, never to bask in the light of the glory of the Mutha Beautiful Thread And It Will Always Be There, amen.<hr></blockquote> I do not, completely, miss the point. I believe that there are those who must be dismissed. I believe that there are those who should not be accepted. I believe, as the gods are my witness, that the useless bastards so judged will die alone in a ditch, unloved and unmourned. My only point of quibble is how we should deal with these 'thousand points of pus', and what we should call them. Shaw wants to call the Newcomers "Scum Sucking Newbies", or SSNs, and make them run the gauntlet. I believe that the Newcomers should bear a title seperate from the general concept of 'Newbie', and bear one more specific to the Peng Challenge Thread. But your point, oh Evil One, is taken. But we speak now of an Ultimate Dismissal, a complete and utter unacceptance to the Peng Challenge. We are, in a word, speaking of Utter Damnation. Even for You, and most especially because of Your Circumstance, this is not something to be lightly applied. It is our ultimate dilemma: On what basis do we deny the Peng Challenge to a supplicant? At what point do we dismiss a pilgrim? By what criteria do we put a shotgun into the applicant's mouth, and pull the trigger? This is the Challenge that faces the Peng Challenge Thread, yet again. How do we build up the sort of club that we wouldn't want to be members of because they'd have us as members?

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Mace: Aye! Well I would saye aye except I'm not a senior Kinnigit due to some technicality. btw, who do I have to sleep with to get promoted around here? Mace<hr></blockquote> Christ on a Crutch, Mace, are you on about that again?! I don't even know where you've gotten this. Has Stuka been making fun of you again in the school yard? For the last freaking time, you patron saint of barnyard animals, you are a Seniour Knight. I keep track of such things. Did I mention that? As horrible a little man as you are, you're a Seniour Knight of the Cesspool. Bugger. You'd think that a group of Useless Pillocks that are as hard to Crush as the Australians could grasp this concept.

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Joe Shaw: Now look you here Seanachai, as the Justicar of the Peng Challenge Thread and Don't You Forget It ... hmmmm, that has a nice ring to it don't you think ... and the appointed keeper of the traditions, I must strongly protest against your stupid suggestion ... no offense intended beyond that implied. The SSN tag has a long and noble history in the CessPool since I devised it and to simply discard it without so much as a by-your-leave is simply wrong. Your alleged complaint is without merit on it's face as, deny it if you can, what status one has on the outerboard is of NO consequence to a CessPooler. Here you either ARE or ARE NOT a CessPooler. ANYONE who sets toe in the fetid and oily waters of the CessPool without being OF the CessPool is a Scum Sucking Newbie and I don't give a dangling damn if their freaking member number is #1. You'll note, for example, that our old and thankfully absent SSN Lard Generic MB has as his sig something that refers to SSNs as if HE WASN'T ONE! Furthermore, as if my demolition of your argument so far wasn't damning enough, the ISSUE at hand is one of a class BELOW SSN and your suggestion does nothing to address that problem. So Seanachai your suggestion is held in complete and total contempt by the Justicariate as being against the Traditions and Practices of the CessPool. Joe<hr></blockquote> Ah! Now Joe, you know that I, at least, have always held your post as Justicar in high esteem. I am, by nature and inclination, a traditionalist, and, amongst the Olde Ones, my role is the contemplation of the Past. But there is a time when Traditions must be appraised, the Past must contemplated, and hard decisions made. As one of the Olde Ones, I must maintain Tradition, while casting every aspect of it into the fires of Berli. I fully acknowledge that 'whatever your status, place, or position, you arrive like a new shorn lamb into the Peng Challenge Thread (i.e., ripe for disembowlment and devouring by predators)'. But the point I wish to make is exactly the point you wish to make. I maintain that the use of the term "Newbie" incorrectly singles out Newbies on the Board in general, and makes more 'established' members think they have already attained a certain status, and therefore can expect a certain treatment on the Peng Challenge Thread. You and I know that nothing could be further from the truth. The veriest, white-fleeced, bleating 'Newbie', still asking 'why can't my HMG teams run', and 'BTS, Why Don't You Close the Peng Thread', are no better in the eyes of the Thread of threads, the Mother Beautiful Thread, than the most arrogant, Fred-esque ÜberGrog who wants to know why 'BTS Allows Improper Modeling of Any Freaking Thing You Can Come Up With', and 'Why BTS Doesn't Close the Peng Thread'. The thing is, here, Shaw, that you and I know there is no difference between these idjits, and we both agree they shouldn't be given any special status of dismissal on the Peng Challenge Thread. But the sticking point is the nature of the title. Now, I maintain that the term Newbies, is not 'specific' to the Peng Challenge Thread. It is a term in general internet usage, and, as such, is open to misinterpretation on both ends of the spectrum. An actual 'Newbie' might think, whatever his qualifications as a Taunter and Human Being, that he was being dismissed out of hand on the Peng Challenge Thread because he was, specifically, an 'Newbie'. On the other hand, a long time poster on the Board might not understand that his utterly useless and sick making post to the Thread of threads was being dismissed because he was a 'Newcomer' to the Peng Challenge Thread, and argue endlessly and pointlessly about not being a 'Newbie'. In other words, Shaw, we are arguing whether the coin toss is facing left, or right. As an Olde One, acknowledging the Justicariate, and wanting to move forward, I would like you to shut the hell up about the goddamn SSN thing, and help the bloody Thread put stinking little puke new arrivals in their proper place without them whining that they're either being discriminated against, or that they're above clasification, and get on board with properly dismissing stinking little puke nothings!

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Goanna: Right. I'll second that. I can think of more than one that should have been proclaimed a FUP for a long while now. However, I suggest a simple plurality of those kaniggets available at the time should be sufficient to proclaim one a FUP if one has given cause to be so named. <hr></blockquote> Now, another point to address: At what point do we declare a poster 'anathema' in the Peng Challenge Thread? We are the highest, and yet most unnatural of threads. We ask everyone who wishes to belong, to come in here, pick someone out, and abuse the ****e out of them. We ask our membership to 'be both the best, and the worst' that they can be. We walk a line that is drawn on the collective psyche. How, then, shall our works be known, and how will the sheep be seperated from the goats? (Sit Down, Mace!) The simplest answer, of course, is the utter 'Darwinism' of the Peng Challenge Thread. When someone of no interest or value to the community begins to post endless streams of tripe, the worst sort are frozen out. They garner an ugly and dismissive post or two, and are never spoken of again. Then there are the next level of SUPs, those who are abusively dismissed, and continue to post because they glory in being noticed. They take a while longer, but they go away, as well. Finally, we have the most awkward level of SUPs, the ones who have the odd intelligible thing to say, the will and desire to belong, but who can't seem to find their arse with both hands even though it's on fire and a ring of people are standing around pointing at it. Into this circle of hell fall Panzer Leader (hello, Squire cum Knight!) and now, AussieJeff. For these useless lot, we have always needed the Peng Challenge Thread of Mother Teresa. In the spirit of leaving no pillock properly dismissed, I hereby propose AussieJeff for the status of Serf. If one Seniour Knight of the Peng Challenge Thread respond with 'aye', he shall be so. If made Serf, I ask of him to consider the great step he has made in the process of being regarded as something other than a bedstained sheet, and address himself to the utterly pointless and intriguing intricacies of being declared Squire. Once you're a Squire, lad, you're half way home. No one's going to notice that you have eleven toes, a purple foreskin, and less than half the intelligence of the average 'household pet that must be kept caged'.

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Seanachai: I point out the aphorism: "If you wish to sup with the Devil, best use a long handled spoon".<hr></blockquote> I wish you lot to notice the lengths I go to to keep this Thread competitive with the Outer Boards. I read a bloody series of posts by some being entitled JasonC the other night, and he'd gone to an almost preternatural level of Grogish uselesness to define, down to the last pence, the origin of the term 'soldier'. Mind, I found it fascinating, and I always delight in such flights of language, but his post was a bit like having Albert Speer show up to play 'Dictionary' at a party. I want our brave, useless, anti-Grog drunkard membership to know that we make every attempt in our own...idiom, to be just as obscure, erudite, and pointlessly fascinating as the forces of Grog on the Outer Boards.

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Berlichtingen: Good suggestion Bauhaus. However, I think we needa more general term... how about FUP Feckin' Useless Pillock?<hr></blockquote> Now, I don't think there should be more than one entity lower than Serf, but I've never been happy with the SSN designation, because of the N for Newbie. This implies a neophyte condition that may be general, and not specific to the Mother Beautiful Thread, and is, for that reason, inappropriate. We don't want sodding Newbies thinking they're being discriminated against in the Peng Challenge Thread because they are sodding Newbies, we want them to know they are being abused, spat on, shat on, and clipped to look like poodles because they are Newcomers in the Peng Challenge Thread. It has nothing to do with their status/arrival on the Board at all (except in a general sort of way). I move that we drop the Scum Sucking Newbie (SSN) designation and move on Berli's rare flash of insight (as opposed to 'sense of incite', which he has all too often), and designate new posters to the Peng Challenge Thread as: Sodding Useless Pillocks, or SUPs, because every term in this title is well-worn in the service of the Peng Challenge Thread, and, as a reference to an archaic but amusing saying, I point out the aphorism: "If you wish to sup with the Devil, best use a long handled spoon".

Ahem. To my many, deeply treasured opponents. Turns might be a little slow for a day or two here, as I've suffered an unplanned interruption of my phone service. Well, actually, the phone company seems to have planned it, but I certainly didn't. However, the payment we've been arguing about has turned up under the front passenger seat of my car, so I imagine they were correct in their repeated assertions that I was, at best, confused. Soon as we sort out a few details, I will resume sending turns.

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Hanns: lastly ¥ª) comforting a certain blonde friend of mine (the Olde Ones know who I'm talking about) whilst she mourns the loss of her grandfather, finds out that her "girlfriend" is an eco-feminist clothed in hotty-Catholic-schoolgirl dressing and tries to deal with her jealous, stalker, cop ex-boyfriend. Hanns <hr></blockquote> Whoa! That would be that fairly wasted but extremely attractive blonde at Glueks named Sascha? Which cop? I also have a friend in town who's reasonable, nice ex-boyfriend is a Minneapolis cop. He might be able to pass the word, as it were.

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Panzer Leader: But whatever, I have seen them mentioned somewhere before and it wasn't this gay model either. Now, far be it from me to groggishly profess to know one way or the other, as some strong evidence has been made to its impossibility of existence, however it hasn't been disproven as of yet. However, that said, I was unable to produce any evidence of its existence, and on some of the Russian web-sites I went to that featured prototype and experimental designs, SURELY this monstrosity would have made an appearance, so I am willing to say that it probably was somebodies Acid-induced modelling experiment (good weathering) but you never know...<hr></blockquote> Excuse me? This gay model? How old are you, lad? It didn't need to be 'disproved' it needed to be 'proved'. Anyone with half a sodding brain could look at it and say, "Roight. Like that ever moved, fought, or even saw the light of day." Your defense of this incredibly embarrasing half-wittedness is, well, just sad. Suck it up. Stop tyring to convince people that the egregious lack of commonsense you've displayed is due to some vague, barely retained 'uber' knowledge, and not merely the result of your usual over-enthusiastic plunge into cerebral shut-down. In other words, take a deep breath, stare straight into the monitor before you, imagine hundreds of pairs of eyes staring back at you, and say: 'Bugger. I don't know what I was thinking about. Another AFV, perhaps, that bares only the very tiniest, infinitesimal resemblance to this laughable modelers joke that I originally was idiotic enough to proclaim as 'real'. I'm so bloody embarassed. I shall henceforth wait until I'm sober before assuring hundreds of people that 'the truth is out there, and I can show you exactly where I left it'. Being wrong, lad, is only a lack of knowledge. Maintaining your ignorance in the face of reality is stupidity. [ 12-09-2001: Message edited by: Seanachai ]</p>

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by MrSpkr: I still blame you for that mess, you pseudo-Celt.<hr></blockquote> I have not spared the rod, nor used less than due diligence, to make him a true member of this community. It behooves you, a former Squire, to aid me, rather than annoy.

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by SuperTed: There's nothing better than Scotch! <hr></blockquote> With one exception. The Peng Challenge Thread is better than Scotch. Or perhaps that's 'better with Scotch'. I see a few of the Newbies are already attempting to 'taunt' each other, although the efforts thus far have been...well, pitiable. Still, it's so good to see new blood leaking slowly into the scuppers. Carry on.

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Panzer Leader: Sorry, I was thinking of this one Or maybe it was this: <hr></blockquote> Bah! You weren't thinking at all! Once again, you leapt into the give and take of ideas with no bloody clue, and should be properly subdued about your horrible, pseudo-grog faux pas. Apologize to everyone for thinking that that mis-modeled BattleTech toy was a real tank. We're waiting...

The Commissar and I are in agreement. All hail Slavic perspicacity! I imagine he'll still punch me in the nose, given half a chance... [ 12-09-2001: Message edited by: Seanachai ]</p>

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Sgt_Kelly: Alright. You guys are making this very difficult. <hr></blockquote> Actually, I think they're making you define with some degree of accuracy what actually occured, which is essential to deciding whether it's a 'bug' in action, a weakness of the Tac AI, or circumstances/player stupidity. If you want to report a 'bug', and want it registered as such, then all other explanatory factors have to be accounted for and dismissed. If you want to merely report that the fact that you got your arse chewed up means there's a bug in the game, than by all means carry on. Don't be surprised if people continue to refine down the question of 'why'. For that matter, you should appreciate their efforts to help determine exactly what was at fault. Your final, more detailed explanation at least made me consider that it might be a bug. Your earlier posts made me picture the times when my troops came under fire, and moved towards the best 'cover', as perceived by the Tac AI, and suffered horribly for it. I just had a squad in a game against JD Morse, one of the evil lawyer types, run across a road, come under fire, and, rather than moving another 5 meters to a point (albeit in 'open terrain') where none of the opposition could have fired upon them, they turned, hit the ground, and headed back the long way through enemy fire towards perceived 'cover'. They died, of course.

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by eeyore: Dear Mr BTS, As a customer of your fine and spiffing product I want to thank you whole-heartedly for your creativity, wisdom and, well, general niceness for all sorts of things, least not when it comes to requests, especially from down-at-heel waifs, such as myself.<hr></blockquote> You want more, boy! You little wretch! No screenshots for you. No updates for you. It's whinging like this what causes unrest. Now, go stand outside your local government offices and sing 'BTS the Beautiful'. Or 'God Save BTS', if you're a limey.

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Stuka: I'm not quite sure what I ended up drinking, it might have been either paint stripper or battery acid, but I know the sun was up when I fell into a coma. I don't remember being in any trees though.<hr></blockquote> Neither did Peng. Fortunately, we had photos. And he was, for the most part, drinking aged and relatively expensive Scotch. At least until he and Shandorf went off to the bar at the hotel where Peng was staying. At which point, I believe, in an attempt to show the waitress his inner sensitivity, he started drinking Silkie Boy drinks like Cosmopolitans, and describing to her what he'd like to do to her with various bar implements. I do know that Berli and I were unable to get service in the hotel bar when we went to pick Peng up at the downtown Marriott. Buggger 'em, though. They had mirrored walls in their sodding elevators. Made you feel like you were standing in there with an infinite number of drunken Berlis and Pengs. Horrible, simply horrible. Thank the gods for the infinite number of Seanachais. [ 12-09-2001: Message edited by: Seanachai ]</p>

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by SuperTed: Here are the match-ups for the first leg of Round 1: The first leg of Round 1 officially starts December 8 and ends at 12:00 pm (GMT -6:00) on December 31. If it's done sooner, that's a good thing. Good luck! <hr></blockquote> SuperTed has clearly never played Peng or Shaw. Three weeks to play a PBEM? It would kill either one of them to move that fast. Come to think of it, though, I'm not much better...

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by REVS: Is this the Aussie log-in, or trans-Tasman peng?<hr></blockquote> What's it matter to you, you anonymous, no-profile pillock? Anyone with a pair or personality would post more than just a screen name and idiocy.