Seanachai

Agreed. </font>

Covered with what? Don't listen to them, Dave H. Turn to the Peng Challenge, Dave. Dave, I'm your father.

Oh, they're alright. We've all been discussing moral philosophy and personal empowerment by means of the Peng Challenge Thread. No viruses, Boggs. Although I think at one point we all mocked you.

At this time, it's believed that the Peng Challenge Thread will appear simultaneously on every Forum, and be allowed to run in excess of 1,000 posts.

Congratulations to BFC for creating the most marvelous games of any sort, let alone wargames, that I have ever played. And condolences for having enabled the Peng Challenge Thread in the process. Or perhaps that's 'ennobled'? Hard to say, hard to say. There are times when I feel like I've abused their kindness by simply paying the fifty some dollars for the games themselves. I've met so many interesting (and occasionally disturbing) people through this Forum, and had so many hours of rather odd amusement in the process, as well as logging more hours on these games than all the others I've ever owned put together, that I feel like I should be paying a monthly subscription for the games rather than a flat fee. CMers have come to my home (most of them invited, so far), rallied to my aid, and showered me with a deeply, deeply satisfying collection of cards, postcards and letters filled with hatred. Hail to thee, BFC! Happy birthday, Combat Mission!

Of course. Which makes the complete and utter lack of comprehension all the more precious and magical.

Hey, Dave H, come sit at our lunchroom table... waves

You know, my monitor screen and keyboard are wearing more of Mike the Wino's wine than I've managed to drink because of you buggers. And my sinuses are starting to burn from the passage of red wine. Stop making me laugh, you lot. You are causing crimes against vinosity. [ September 22, 2003, 07:13 PM: Message edited by: Seanachai ]

You pretty much constantly discover that when the sun is up, it's light outside, don't you?

Ah, Peng, who'm I kidding. I can't stay mad at you! What say we share this stalker? Heck, he hates Berli too, so we could just make him the Mortal Enemy and lunatic stalker of the Olde Ones. In any case, it looks like some of the lads aren't amused with him anymore (short attention spans - it's hard to keep pets around here), and Shaw is about to pronounce his doom. Everyone should have a sodding turn by now. Except maybe whoever it is that I didn't manage to send a setup to. [ September 22, 2003, 02:45 AM: Message edited by: Seanachai ]

Let me just say that the fabulous letter I received from you, and the old coins that look like you'd found them under a washing machine, or something, were much appreciated. And the actual pocket lint in the envelope had me in tears.

Ah Ha! I can say you nay! Therefore I say... </font>

And a thousand honest men bit their tongue in anguish, contrition and at the same instant in time.... </font>

Well, I would be ashamed, but my over-weaning ego and the knowledge that I clearly am superiour argues me out of it. Now, Boo, as my large and oafish henchman, it will be your duty to put the collar and leash on Cabron66 and direct his snarling disregard for Reality and decorum at the many enemies we have earned here on the Forum, as well as that lot from Australia. Just watch your legs. I will not ask you to bathe him, because when he gets worked up the spray of spittle pretty much takes care of any imperfections to his coat. You may be asked on occasion to feed him, but this will probably be rare, as an important part of maintaining the Victim/Stalker relationship will be in making sure that his food comes from my own hand. Neither of us will need to spend much time with taking him for 'walkies', as it is pretty clear from reading the other threads that he's still trying to participate in that he's completely at home with soiling himself wherever he happens to be at the moment.

Peng, I am sad to see this day come. I always told myself that, no matter how over the top you got, I would never end my support for you. But now I am afraid that I will have to change my tune. Now, I find myself, like Cabron66, in a position of having to call for your banning. How dare you go slutting around after my Stalker, you bastard?! I get called away from posting for a couple of days, worrying the whole time that my new Mortal Enemy will be quite lost and adrift without me, and what do I return to? You jezebeling up and down on the Thread of threads, handing out abuse (and vile bad abuse it was, too, Peng. Let's not go the way of MrHappy, shall we?), and offering to lure him away from his proper and just hatred of myself by offering drug orgies and a rather disturbing excess of peppers. You watch yourself, laddy! I'll have your shameless attempts to corrupt my Mortal Enemy wrapped up and sent on to BFC before you can shake another dollop of talcum powder out, see if I won't! The nerve! Eight months of virtual silence, while I slave away earning my damn hatred, Peng, and then you come in here and with a couple of vulgar posts attempt to capitalize on everything I've achieved. Did you, Peng, read the innumerable abusive, clueless, humourless and above all, witless posts by Cabron66, as I did? No, you did not. Did you bother to attempt to tweak him with a bit of humour in the attempt to get him to lighten up, and then sit through his rather vulgar an bullying abuse? No. Did you take the time to make multiple posts explaining to him exactly why everyone regarded him as a twit, why he was being shunned, and just how clueless he was being? No, again you did not. Did you wander away, laughing a little in amazement that anyone could be that big a pillock, only to have the same fool follow you into the Thread and demand that you make, as he put it, 'peace' with him, or suffer the consequences? I don't think that was you, Peng. But, did you suddenly show up, toss off a few Subterranean Homesick Pengs, and attempt to assume ownership of my lunatic Canadian Stalker and deeply, deeply paranoid Mortal Enemy? Yes, Peng, that sounds like what you did! I think that BFC will be very interested in this behaviour, MrPeng! You will excuse me now, I hope, while a take a transcription, photo documentary, and PowerPoint presentation of your recent posts over to BFC to see if you are the sort of person they want posing on this Board! When I posted my threads asking for cards, postcards, and letters filled with the Forum Members' hatred, did you privately email them all and ask them to send those to you, instead? Good day to you, sir! [ September 21, 2003, 08:52 PM: Message edited by: Seanachai ]

Nothing you'll miss. Ah, does everyone notice how my wee bairn of a mortal enemy is sound asleep? And I'm still after posting? Young Mortal Enemies today. They've no staying power.

Of course, if the main body of those words are 'Oh you fuzzy baby', 'Stand still', 'Stop kicking', and 'I loved your mother just as much as ewe', then the picture says it all.

Cabron66! Cabron66! Where are you, lad? I talked about you in this thread. Why aren't you here to put me on display as your Mortal Enemy? Sorry. I'm sure my personal, dedicated stalker will show up here eventually. It's just that I worry about him getting it all right, you know? Showing up and attacking me, I mean. I'd hate for my new personal Mortal Enemy to show up here to thrash me, and make a fool of himself. I mean, how embarrassing is that? Personal Mortal Enemy shows up, you introduce him around the Master Goodale thread, and he makes a complete bollocks of it. Look, I'm sure he'll be here shortly. He's probably just gone off to throw up for a while after his most recent pitiable round of drunken self-humiliation. Umm...so how about that Soddball, eh? What a Pyrate!

Bah! Garbage. De Quincey does a much better job, and makes more sense. Now this is very strange! He has, probably completely inadvertantly, made the jump to the Wasteland where the Olde Ones wait! Odd. Interesting. Mind, he's still a little puddle of puppy piss, but this is an intriguing image. It's like he's aware of the History of the Peng Challenge. It's as if he knew that nothingness called forth The Beginnings. And, taking a negative approach, he's suggesting an image of dissolution in the wake of the Peng Challenge, rather than the image of creation (albeit a very, very strange creation) that the Peng Challenge actually entails. It's like an anti-Dreaming. He seeks by his negative participation to uncreate, to the annoyance of the Olde Ones, what the folk have brought forth to annoy the Olde Ones. I can't be having with that. We're not after having any little nihilistic pissants here in the Peng Challenge Thread. We don't mind if it's rude, as such, nor arrogant, as such, but we draw the line at those as what would unmake the rudeness and arrogance just because no one's knelt down and smooched their arse enough. Cabron66, you're going to have to do better. I can't be having with a 'mortal enemy' who would return to the emptiness of the Void. If you're not creating something, lad, you're just another gelding waiting for the butcher.

You know this really hurts. I know that I haven't been very dogged about the whole thing, but I thought I was your personal stalker. Ever since I was a wet behind the ears Pool dipper, and you told me that you indeed were Kurtz, and were awaiting me at the end of the river, I set your destruction or salvation as my goal. [sob] I can't help it if I've wandered a bit ... gotten sidetracked on lesser tasks [sob, sniffle], but you've got to give me another chance [sOB]. I promise to do better. </font>

I do not believe that Peng has yet taken notice of Cabron66. I hesitate to point him out, as he is my stalker, confirming a certain Celebrity status not enjoyed by Peng, who does not have his own mortal enemy stalker (at least active at this time). Well, Michael, you raise a good point: Look at what we have made of you. Absolutely nothing, of course. I imagine we can do even more for Cabron66. We might be able to make him far less than nothing. Does anyone else have this weird feeling of disorientation about his posting? I mean, there are moments when his language and sentence structure are quite stilted and opaque, and then he suddenly hits a post where he simply runs with things and everything sounds quite contemporary. Also, he swings back and forth between someone working actively to sound like 'an older person', and someone more naturally posting like a 'late teens to early twenty-something'. Mind, whenever he's trying to post 'high-minded and superiour' is when he's stilted and older sounding, but when he starts getting carried away and talking trash, he sounds more at ease and like someone who may only recently have begun to shave.

Well, once the other Canadians started attacking him, it got harder and harder to claim that he was being persecuted for being Canadian.

Wow! You should do Anime movies! You've go the feel! This is a proud moment in the 'mortal enemy' cycle. You finally posted something that made me feel some...well, I guess 'interest' is the best word. Look, everybody! Cabron66 had an...interesting post! Unless you just stole the whole imagery from some where? You didn't do that, did you? Not that there's anything wrong with that, of course. As Woody Guthrie said, "plagiarism is the basis of all culture". But a lot of the fun runs out if it wasn't your own creation. No, I'm going with the idea that that was your own creation! There didn't seem much point to it, actually, but it was a neat image.

Hallo! Evil Clown lads! It is I, Seanachai. Just wanted to stop by and introduce you to my new lunatic stalker and mortal enemy, Cabron66! You met him already, of course. He's the one who thinks all the threads are being padlocked because of him. Gormless. Now, he thinks that he and I are locked in some life and death struggle of power and dominance, or something (that part's all a bit vague, actually), so if I ever happen to post here, or should you see me posting on the rest of the Forum, don't be surprised if he shows up to, oh, revile me, or contradict me, or point out to you how bad I am and how you shouldn't listen to me because I'm a monster or something. Of course, I know you lot aren't likely to be surprised by anyone showing up to bad mouth me. I mean, you do it yourselves almost constantly. But, you know, act like whatever he tells you is new, and act all outraged and stuff. He's my first ever mortal enemy, and I want him to feel that he's doing well. Give him a bit of a boost. So, maybe you could make him feel welcome, and turn loose the Finnish bugggers to go 'Oh yes, that Seanachai, he hates all ethnics, you know. We hate him too! He insults the memory of our grandfathers by his very existence.' And maybe the rest of you could tell him: 'You don't need to tell us about Seanachai! We ran that pusy out of here on a rail! We're with you Cabron66, in your fight to attain justice against the Grogs.' I'm not sure he thinks I'm an actual Grog. Probably just a Grog running dog, or something. And Soddball, maybe you could explain to him that, even though you are almost as awful as I am, that we're really nothing alike and should never be mistaken for each other, and that you'd be more than happy to help him drive me from the Board. He's a bit dim, you see. It's almost...magical. But when someone marches in and starts playing Ahab to your whale, you end up with certain responsibilities. You lot know that. I mean, what's the Goodalers without a lot of general and thorough going hatred? You buggers put me in mind of the Nac Mac Feegle. So do what you can. I imagine he'll be by shortly, if he hasn't been posting while I've been worrying over how to introduce him.

This is the basis for your contention that I attacked your ethnicity? I never said word one about Mexicans. Full, half, or quarter, I remember passing no affront of any kind against anything Mexican. Are you now saying, as has been the thrust of your points all along, that because I poked fun at you, and read you off, that because you are half Mexican, that I attacked all Mexicans? Would someone please start taking notes? I'm no longer completely certain which portions of the globe I'm supposed to have attacked last. This sort of info will all be needed for the tribunal at The Hague. My God, if people only realized that all you had to do to attack an entire nation, or ethnic group, was not fawn all over Cabron66 enough, what a lot of time could be saved! Now, Cabron. This is probably a good time to introduce my new lunatic stalker mortal enemy bestest buddy to the lads over at the Goodale Thread. I'm heading over there now to post. I'll let them know you'll be coming by, shall I?