Mark IV

Dear General Hodges: I'm commanding the 5th Panzer Division opposite you, and we'll be invading your sector just before sunrise tomorrow. Would you be so kind as to forward a list of the forces at your disposal? We'll need some idea of what we'll be facing, in order to requisition special equipment from Berlin and have it here in the morning. I'm sure you have the same issues with Washington. The weather will be snowy and overcast, fortunately for us. Needless to say, should we awake to find the weather clear, we will hold you personally responsible. I'm sure you understand our frustration in agreeing upon tomorrow's weather, only to find ourselves completely unprepared due to a sudden change. As a panzer commander, I cherish the flexibility to immediately convert to an infantry unit when the situation or conditions dictate. I'm sure you've found yourself wishing for an extra antitank gun or two, and know how you appreciate it when they drop them off within the hour. I appreciate your prompt attention to these matters. Sincerely, etc. Reason #24 to stick to cesspoolers and others of known honor. I don't know what others are into the CM experience for, but cheating would not occur to me, probably making me easy to cheat against. But as you get to know folks from their posts you can kind've tell who else feels the same way. I have never seen it and don't worry about it. If it was undeniably the case, I would terminate the game and tell the world. A fix for this is WAY less important than the next patch or even CM2, IMHO.

...I directed a searing burst of flame at a nearby nest of kitty cats, who ran squealing and burning into the...

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by PeterNZer: For this reason, if you're Elvis, Chrisl or Mark IV it might be best just to send your surrender file in on Friday. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Dunno about the others, but if you think you're Mark IV, you're not, and you're guilty of impersonating a CM demi-god. And since when did chrisl get capitalized? I must have missed the IPO... Now then, laddie: If you could actually attach a file to an email, one related to any games I happen to be playing (if you can call it that), things might move along. Or you could just take the Croda route and disappear altogether, which come to think of it, would be preferable. I don't recall ever having sent a surrender out. We lose the old-fashioned way; we die in place. To the last man and the last cartridge. There are a few more tricks in the bag. Special Notes for Geier, who is still trying to fold his site map and find his way here to the new thread, and Elvis: You are both Marked IV death, only be patient, little ones. I would really like to see a nice shiny new patch under my tree before embarking on any fresh massacres. I suspect one is in the offing. The 1.1b experience was not particularly good. Sharpen up on the others and enjoy while you can.

Antitank/AA gun?

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Lord General MB: WHAT THE $%$& IS THIS THREAD ABOUT NOW? <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> The topic has never changed. It is still about ripping the skull off one's enemies, slurping out their brains, spitting the fibrous chunks into the eyes of passers-by, and belching with satisfaction. It is also a place for loathing the stupid and despising the obvious. There are no hamsters here. There were, but they became stupid and obvious. They were one of the many gifts your local Peng thread has given you, of the Outer Board. We have moved on. Expect more. This is the place for playing the damned game! Not for another button on the user interface that undoes all your mistakes and sucks the bullets back into the guns, not for quibbling over ballistics and optics, not for amusing anecdotes about what your Panther did against the AI this morning, but for taking the game as it stands and pointing all these wonderful weapons at one another. You've never heard music until you've heard the bleating of a gut-shot cesspooler. Long live the Peng Thread!

Fair enough. The blood is rushing back to my feet. I suppose this means another busload of tourists will be dropping by. Fresh meat for the grinder, mmmm...

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Chupacabra: Bah, but you ignore the experience of the 14th Hosenshlange division in Poland, in which Finnish Holztruppen were unable to use their Gemüsenwaffe against attacking Soviet units.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> ...and to this day, mothers still say "Finnish your vegetables!" And now you know... the rest of the story. If half the simple user interface tweaks already suggested had been adopted, the battle window on my screen would now be less than 1 square inch. But I could make those suckers dance.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Germanboy: "...the pub, because a pint of Stout is definitely recommended if you have to carry a blimmin' flamethrower into battle. Unfortunately I was only half-way down the road..."<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> ...when I came across a dead body. But there was no blood! Taking the nearly full bottle of Macallan from its outstretched hand, I uncorked it and wondered why...

Print Screen only copies the screen to your clipboard, in .bmp format. Then open a graphics app, Paint (under Accessories) will do, and click CTRL-V or paste it anyway you choose. You will get a humongous bitmap. The best thing to do then is get a real graphics app and convert it to a JPEG image. I strongly recommend Paint Shop Pro from JASC. They have version 7 out now and there is usually a free try-and-die version on download.com.

However, there is no reason why a Kartoffelwerfer should NOT be able to target it. Gemuesenwaffen were never subject to LOS restrictions.

He owes us an especially bombastic, vile, and creative post. A Pengless pool is an unhappy place.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by guachi: So has anyone taken over the mantle of searchonaut in the last few months? A big "Hello!" to all the folks that recognize my screen name. You CAN get too much Combat Mission. guachi (absent head of the Searchonauts)<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Hey, welcome back. Your work has been missed. We are still wondering if you couldn't save all of your turns into one big movie, whether you should be able to run with MGs, and why you can't indrect fire with on-board mortars by themselves. Been killing anyone lately?

I think Seanachai's proposal is reasonable and moderate, under the circumstances. We didn't have these problems when the thread was right-side up. I'm getting the 12 bore down off the wall now. I do believe Croda has Australian leanings....

Q: What did the tire say to the lawyer? A: Bump.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Seanachai: What's a world or a thread without the folk who gave us Voltaire, etc.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Never, ever, forget de Maupassant. It is belittling to merely call him the imspiration for O. Henry. He is Dostoevsky, with joie de vivre. And more quotable, since you can nearly use a proper keyboard. Marcel?

Or this one: BANGBLAMBOOMBOOM Platoon commander: We've got a machine gun in the woods! Request 60mm mortar strike at (coordinates)! BANGBLAMBOOMBOOM Company commander: WHAT? BANGBLAMBOOMBOOM RTO: Umm Sir, the mortar section doesn't carry a radio... BANGBLAMBOOMBOOM Mortar platoon commander: WHAT?

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Forever Babra: Feel free to share the endgame file with me any time<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Sent out 7:04 AM Pacific time- apologies if you didn't receive it (I wondered where the comments were?). Just resent in case, to the Babrakhan address. I thought I had waited a decent interval. Also, rather than scotch, we're featuring a nice light dry sherry at the moment with some Campo al Montalban goat cheese, soon to be augmented by your delightful Canadian Oka.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by PawBroon: I'm not into famous last words so I'll make that one quick. I'm off.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Hey, what's this about? You can't just leave. What is the deal???

Actually that was Steve who spoke: <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Generally speaking, players often try to do TOO much in too short a period of time. Good recon involves a lot of stopping and looking around. This means using PAUSE, inherent C&C delays, or whole turns. When a unit is not moving it can detect far more than when it is, just like real life. You can do plenty with the orders already in the game if you use them correctly and do not try to have your units pack 10 minutes worth of scouting into 1 or 2 turns.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by dalem: Which is more insulting<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Being called something that sounds a lot like "gollum", of course.

Err... you might need to delete your Combat Mission Prefs file first. Then set the new screen resolution, and launch the game.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by M. Bates: Get him a tennis racket or something!<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Sure, and start down the slippery slope to blunt instruments. Tennis players have become too violent to serve as role models for 14-year olds, anyway. I recently bought an inexpensive dual-tech Daisy Powerline BB gun that shoots both air and CO2. Pretty cool for living-room practice, and the occasional backyard pest. The Sheridan had some over-penetration issues for indoor use...

No, we're yawning. Everyone wins against frenchie. Some of the lads are out with lanterns and brooms looking for mensch, who is out the cage again, his water dish untouched. More importantly... Lorak! Log another topplement lad, and quickly. I have gloriously defeated the wretch F. Babra, speaking of frenchies, again, by the whopping margin of 54-40. The score does not tell the whole story. If you're lucky, I won't either. Suffice it to say that we withstood one of the worst arty barrages I have seen to date, huge masses of infantry speaking incomprehensible gibberish, and a bunch of AFVs who are all dead now. Oh, and a horrid little flamethrower. Bastard. There will be a scotch and cheese reception here at Schloss IV this afternoon for the survivors and you're all invited. Except for Peng, who may spread contagion, and PeterNZer because I am feeling bitter. Though still very much alive.

I guess that's what folks want for CM? Looks like they dropped those Monty Python 2000 lb. weights directly on each guy.

German HTs: You might not be using them to the best of their advantage... lay back. They don't have the armor to withstand .50 fire and the crews know it. You should, too. Vickers MG: Surprised to hear this. MGs are for suppression, infantry's for killin', and this usually seems to work. They don't seem to spend a lot of time jammed. 2" mortars: Yes, you need a hug. Try focusing about 6 of them on a soft enemy you pariicularly dislike. They are also for suppression, or at least moral support. I guess they had a lot of them at the time. At least they can Run.