Seanachai Challenges Peng to the Inappropriateness of Shock Thread

[Seanachai]

Originally posted by Boo Radley:

My question concerning the photo is, is the dude in the Aussie hat the ship's Captain? And if so, aren't they only allowed to marry people while on board the ship?

What the hell, did they use to bus you home from school to Disney World? They got married in the Caribbean. That means that after they split the package they bought from the street kid/Kiwi drifter/bull dyke/what-have-you three ways with the guy they met in the beach-side bar wearing an Aussie hat, he married them on the beach.

For all practical purposes, not only are Lars and Shari married, but they're also currently married to some aussie hat wearing junkie who's currently prowling around St. Kitts asking people how to get to Jamaica.

Christ on a crutch, I knew that Akron wasn't a center of cosmopolitan glitterati, but I didn't realize that you were as clueless as a Nebraska drunkard trying to figure out if Denver was in the direction of the rising or setting sun.

[Seanachai]

Originally posted by Nidan1:

I looks like an old movie poster for "Mutiny on the Bounty"...thats about all I can make out of it.

That's not true. It it looked like an old movie poster for 'Mutiny on the Bounty', it would feature a shot of Rune locked in combat with Mr. Christian...

[Mace]

Originally posted by Stuka:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by NG cavscout:

today was rough, our internet went out for almost 30 minutes!!!

wow, war is hell... </font>

[Seanachai]

Originally posted by NG cavscout:

What would Small Emma say if she heard you talking like that?

She would say: I'm touching the tiger's toes. Now you do it, Grandma Steve!

And she would watch me, very serious, until I had touched the tiger's toes.

There's no one like a 2 year old for cosmically pure and lovable tyranny.

But you're right. As Grandma Steve, I cannot disengage from the world simply because I'm filled with ennui over my own existence.

I think it was my defeat by Boo that sent me down the spiral of despair. In other words: I blame Boo Radley.

I trusted him to make Ohio Blue, and he betrayed me.

[Boo Radley]

Originally posted by Seanachai:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Boo Radley:

My question concerning the photo is, is the dude in the Aussie hat the ship's Captain? And if so, aren't they only allowed to marry people while on board the ship?

What the hell, did they use to bus you home from school to Disney World? They got married in the Caribbean. That means that after they split the package they bought from the street kid/Kiwi drifter/bull dyke/what-have-you three ways with the guy they met in the beach-side bar wearing an Aussie hat, he married them on the beach.

For all practical purposes, not only are Lars and Shari married, but they're also currently married to some aussie hat wearing junkie who's currently prowling around St. Kitts asking people how to get to Jamaica.

Christ on a crutch, I knew that Akron wasn't a center of cosmopolitan glitterati, but I didn't realize that you were as clueless as a Nebraska drunkard trying to figure out if Denver was in the direction of the rising or setting sun. </font>

[Michael Emrys]

Originally posted by NG cavscout:

two excellent movies, Zulu Dawn...

Ack! Piece of junk. The original Zulu, you know, the one with Michael Caine?, is much better. ZD is just a disappointing ripoff.

Michael

[Michael Emrys]

Originally posted by MrPeng:

...I am not a nag and a scold...

Yeah? I remember Nixon claiming he was not a crook too.

Michael

[Lars]

Originally bleated by Boo:

My question concerning the photo is, is the dude in the Aussie hat the ship's Captain?

I'll have you know that's Captain Fernando, our Venezuelan skipper of the three-master in the background and lady killer extraordinaire.

And if so, aren't they only allowed to marry people while on board the ship?

Welcome to the Caribbean, where anything goes. Nearest cop was four or five islands away.

(And really, Lars. With legs like that, shorts are not your friend. Know what I mean, fella?)

What the hell are you doing looking at my legs? Seen Brokeback Mountain twelve times this week or somefink?

[Michael Emrys]

Originally posted by Boo Radley:

Ahem..."There's many a strange impulse out on the plains of West Texas;

There's many a young boy who feels things he don't comprehend.

Well small town don't like it when somebody falls between sexes,

No, small town don't like it when a cowboy has feelings for men.

Well I believe in my soul that inside every man there's a feminine,

And inside every lady there's a deep manly voice loud and clear.

Well, a cowboy may brag about things that he does with his women,

But the ones who brag loudest are the ones that are most likely queer.

Cowboys are frequently secretly fond of each other

What did you think those saddles and boots was about?

There's many a cowboy who don't understand the way that he feels towards his brother,

Inside every cowboy there's a lady who'd love to slip out.

Ten men for each woman was the rule way back when on the prairie,

And somehow those cowboys must have kept themselves warm late at night.

Cowboys are famous for getting riled up about fairies,

But I'll tell you the reason a big strong man gets so uptight:

Cowboys are frequently secretly fond of each other

That's why they wear leather, and Levi's and belts buckled tight.

There's many a cowboy who don't understand the way that he feels towards his brother;

There's many a cowboy who's more like a lady at night.

Well there's always somebody who says what the others just whisper,

And mostly that someone's the first one to get shot down dead:

When you talk to a cowboy don't treat him like he was a sister

Don't mess with the lady that's sleepin' in each cowboy's head.

Cowboys are frequently secretly fond of each other

Even though they take speed and drive pickups and shoot their big guns;

There's many a cowboy who don't understand the way that he feels towards his brother;

There's many a cowboy who keeps quiet about things he's done. "

Is this by way of a confession, Boo? Have you finally decided to come out? Should we inform the news media?

Michael

[Lars]

Originally posted by Seanachai:

That means that after they split the package they bought from the street kid/Kiwi drifter/bull dyke/what-have-you three ways with the guy they met in the beach-side bar wearing an Aussie hat, he married them on the beach.

Buy it? Hell, they were giving the stuff away.

Now, don't you feel sorry you didn't go you old hippie?

[Boo Radley]

Originally posted by Lars:

I'll have you know that's Captain Fernando, our Venezuelan skipper of the three-master in the background and lady killer extraordinaire.

Is that how his resume reads or did he tell you that while eyeing your wallet?

Welcome to the Caribbean, where anything goes. Nearest cop was four or five islands away.

So, you're not really married in the U.S., eh? I smell a loophole for your better half. And what do cops have to do with you getting married? There's an extremely unsavory level to this whole business, I'm thinking. What are you hiding, Lars? Hmmmmm?

What the hell are you doing looking at my legs? Seen Brokeback Mountain twelve times this week or somefink?

I'm a visual person. I notice everything. Like I notice that you at least have the fashion sense to wear loud, colorful shirts in an effort to hide the food stains that inevitably cover the front of your clothing. It's elementary, my dear Nimrod.

[Lars]

Originally posted by Boo Radley:

I'm a visual person.

That's a pretty good euphemism for not being able to read beyond a 3rd grade level.

Who told it to you?

[Michael Emrys]

Originally posted by MrPeng:

Match-head rockets:

as many packs of paper matches as you can safely squirrel away without the parents noticing

foil

paper-clip

pencil

x-acto knife

form a tube with the foil around the pencil using the point to make a nice nose cone.

scrape the heads off of as many matches as you can stand before it gets too bloody boring.

stuff - GENTLY - the match-head scrapings into the foil tube.

Snip the tube off so that it is even with the last of the scrapings.

cut one match-head off and stuff it in the open end of the tube and pinch the tube so just the tip of the match-head is sticking out.

rest the rocket on the paperclip launcher.

light the rocket.

I can give you one better than that, drawn from my own experience. You will need:

1 CO2 cartridge (available from hobby shops)

1 Hacksaw (obtained in whatever manner presents itself)

A quantity of zinc dust (available from paint stores; might as well get a pound, this stuff is fun)

A jar of flowers of sulphur (you might can find this at a drugstore, otherwise you're on your own {it's been a while since I did this kind of thing, you understand})

1 fuse (scavenged from a firecracker cherry bomb, etc. {you do keep cherry bombs around just in case, don't you?}) Unless you have had training and experience, don't try to make your own fuse. This is important.

Suitable implements for mixing and packing powder.

Now, the first thing you want to do is to release the CO2 from the cartridge. There are a variety of ways to do this, so I'll let you figure it out on your own. A couple of them may be unsafe, but what's a life without risk, eh?

Once you have degassed the cartridge, take the hacksaw and saw the last little tippy bit of the small end of the cartridge. That's so you can load the bloody thing, you idiot. Now put the cartridge aside. This is where the fun begins.

Spoon roughly equal amounts of zinc dust and sulphur (there is formula for the exact amounts for optimum performance, but that is the advanced class, never mind that now), say a couple tablespoons of each, into a glass or ceramic bowl. Now mix them together with a glass rod. It's important that you avoid using metal implements here as you DO NOT want to generate any sparks at this point. Well, okay, you can ignore my advice if you want to, but don't blame me if you burn your eyebrows and nosehairs off.

Once you get the zinc dust and sulphur thoroughly mixed together, you can begin loading it into the cartridge. A small plastic funnel and a plastic spoon are handy for this part of the operation.

Now we come to a delicate question, How densely should we pack the powder into the cartridge? If you don't really pack it at all, you get high thrust but a shorter burn time. If you pack it, it will produce a longer burn time but reduced thrust. Also, if you try to pack it really hard, using a piston and a mallet to really get some muscle on it, it will likely explode...with possibly painful consequences. My guess is that the people that actually tried this never popped caps with a hammer before and didn't know anything about compression ignition. That's learning the hard way.

Okay, so now assuming that you have loaded the damn thing without blowing your head off, you need to insert the fuse and maybe wrap a little masking tape around the end to hold the fuse in place and keep the powder from leaking out while it is being transported.

Now you need to select a launch site. Being well away from dried grass or leaves is a good thing. Also, it is not recommended that you point this thing in the general direction of your neighbor's $3,000 plate glass window. If you think windows are baseball magnets, there is a groove in the space-time continuum that runs directly from any piece of glass to your rocket. It's theoretically impossible to miss...unless of course you actually want to hit the window. Human desire plays Hob with the space-time continuum. For the same reason, automobiles (especially the kind that have policemen sitting in them; they are very unsympathetic) are to be avoided.

Having selected a site and oriented the launch vehicle (the cartridge, you dolt), you get your little brother to light the fuse. No, schmuck, you don't light it yourself. You want to be some good distance away, preferably behind something solid, observing through binoculars. Instruct your brother that after he has lit the fuse, he is to run. Not downrange. Believe me, however interesting it might be from a purely scientific point of view, your mom will be very pissed off if she has to run your little brother to the ER to have a flaming hot metal cartridge removed from his anus while he screams bloody murder. She might even take the extreme step of writing you out of her will.

If you have done everthing right (by no means a certain proposition), and everything goes according to plan (ditto), your rocket should ignite with a very satisfying FAPPP and disappear at a high rate of speed in the chosen direction, most likely never to be seen again. Unless an irate neighbor shows up at your door asking your mom if she recognizes this strange object and would she mind if he took your fingerprints.

At this point, you should of course firmly resolve to be sure to remove all fingerprints from future pyrotechnic experiments. You did take the precaution of concealing in a friend's basement all your chemicals and paraphenalia, didn't you? Didn't you?

Michael

[ March 01, 2006, 07:31 AM: Message edited by: Michael Emrys ]

[Michael Emrys]

Originally posted by Nidan1:

God Shaw , could you make it any friggen smaller?

I looks like an old movie poster for "Mutiny on the Bounty"...thats about all I can make out of it.

And how about cropping it so that everything is trimmed away except for Shary? She looks like a sturdy lass, doesn't she? We really don't need to see Lars. I mean, who'd want to see Lars anyway? Except Boo maybe.

Michael

[Michael Emrys]

Originally posted by Boo Radley:

(And really, Lars. With legs like that, shorts are not your friend. Know what I mean, fella?)

Covering his face wouldn't be a bad move at all either.

Michael

[Michael Emrys]

Originally posted by Lars:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally bleated by Boo:

My question concerning the photo is, is the dude in the Aussie hat the ship's Captain?

I'll have you know that's Captain Fernando, our Venezuelan skipper of the three-master in the background and lady killer extraordinaire.</font>

[Lars]

Originally posted by Michael Emrys:

I can give you one better than that, drawn from my own experience. You will need:

{***snipped***}

Pah, mere beginners.

Needed:

1.- Compound Bow.

2 - Arrow.

3 - Estes rocket engine.

4 - Fuse.

5 - Duct tape.

The real trick here is timing. It is much to be desired that the engine go off on the ascent.

[Yeknodathon]

More like a ticket for double parking the catamaran.

[MrPeng]

Originally posted by Lars:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Michael Emrys:

I can give you one better than that, drawn from my own experience. You will need:

{***snipped***}

Pah, mere beginners.

Needed:

1.- Compound Bow.

2 - Arrow.

3 - Estes rocket engine.

4 - Fuse.

5 - Duct tape.

The real trick here is timing. It is much to be desired that the engine go off on the ascent. </font>

[Nidan1]

Say Lars , are those "Windjammer" cruises that you go on? Do they have anything that goes to the South Pacific?

[Joe Shaw]

I'm going to Dallas for the next two days ... you can all go to hell ... pretty much sixes.

Joe

[Lars]

Originally posted by Nidan1:

Say Lars , are those "Windjammer" cruises that you go on? Do they have anything that goes to the South Pacific?

Yep. They did send the Amazing Grace out to Tahiti a couple of years ago.

No word on whether they are going to return as that ship is in drydock for a good long while.

But if they do, I'm on the plane…

Btw, where you thinking of going? Got a few links.

[ March 01, 2006, 02:41 PM: Message edited by: Lars ]

[Nidan1]

I was thinking of it, my wife is not good on smaller boats though...I have a hard time geting her on the giant cruise ships.

Those three-masters might be too much like sailing for her liking. I would hate to plan something like that and have her sea sick all the time.

We took a caribbean catamaran cruise for a week once back in the early 80s, but that was when we were much younger. She really tried to have a good time, but she just doesnt do well on boats.

I really loved it, I enjoy the sea and being around boats.

[Nidan1]

Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

I'm going to Dallas for the next two days ... you can all go to hell ... pretty much sixes.

Joe

Say hello to JR and Bobby for me....thanks Joe .

[Speedy]

You might want to check out the Soren Larsen Nidan.