I Offer Grog Dorosh the Peng Challenge, And He Be Man Enough

[Lars]

Originally posted by Simon Elwen:

"snip"

Pa-thet-ick.

Just because it's raining where you are and you've been stuck inside all day and want someone to play with doesn't mean we want to listen to you. Challenge someone specific or go play in traffic.

Now, before I start the weekend early and evaporate into the bars...

Game Updates:

Agua Perdido: Still thinking about Rees-am-Rhein.

MrSpkr: Sent me Rees-am-Rhein. Great minds think alike. Try again.

Iskander: Forget about the kid, send a turn.

OGSF: The vast majority of his armor is now smoking wreckage. Only one thing left for him to do. Infantry charge! The Royal Regiment will soon be down to a half squad.

CMplayer: Send a turn.

Noba: It's his two PIV's vs my Greyhound and a company of Infantry hiding in the woods on top of the flags. Just marking time till his topplement.

AussieJeff: Is getting ever closer to the flag. Come on, just a little closer…

Hanns: Actually received a e-mail from Hanns today. Pity there wasn't a turn attached. ***BOOT***.

Sock Monkey: Send a turn.

[Guest PondScum]

Originally posted by Berlichtingen of the flaming pitchfork:

Not bad... much better than your first attempt. However, it lacks the panache necessary to be truly worthy of the Mutha Beautiful Thread

Of course it doesn't have panache, you Hadean imp -- it's a TRANSLATION. Read it in the original Spanish for as much feckin' panache as you want.

Oh, you gave up Spanish back in the reign of the Inquisition? Fine, fine. Try this one on for size then. A particular hero of mine.

Onde è necessario a uno principe, volendosi mantenere, imparare a potere essere non buono, et usarlo e non usare secondo la necessità. Lasciando adunque indrieto le cose circa uno principe immaginate, e discorrendo quelle che sono vere, dico che tutti li uomini, quando se ne parla, e massime e' principi, per essere posti più alti, sono notati di alcune di queste qualità che arrecano loro o biasimo o laude. E questo è che alcuno è tenuto liberale, alcuno misero (usando uno termine toscano, perché avaro in nostra lingua è ancora colui che per rapina desidera di avere, misero chiamiamo noi quello che si astiene troppo di usare il suo); alcuno è tenuto donatore, alcuno rapace; alcuno crudele, alcuno pietoso; l'uno fedifrago, l'altro fedele; l'uno effeminato e pusillanime, l'altro feroce et animoso; l'uno umano, l'altro superbo; l'uno lascivo, l'altro casto; l'uno intero, l'altro astuto; l'uno duro, l'altro facile; l'uno grave l'altro leggieri; l'uno relligioso, l'altro incredulo, e simili. Et io so che ciascuno confesserà che sarebbe laudabilissima cosa uno principe trovarsi di tutte le soprascritte qualità, quelle che sono tenute buone: ma, perché non si possono avere né interamente osservare, per le condizioni umane che non lo consentono, li è necessario essere tanto prudente che sappia fuggire l'infamia di quelle che li torrebbano lo stato, e da quelle che non gnene tolgano guardarsi, se elli è possibile; ma, non possendo, vi si può con meno respetto lasciare andare. Et etiam non si curi di incorrere nella infamia di quelli vizii sanza quali possa difficilmente salvare lo stato; perché, se si considerrà bene tutto, si troverrà qualche cosa che parrà virtù, e seguendola sarebbe la ruina sua; e qualcuna altra che parrà vizio, e seguendola ne riesce la securtà et il bene essere suo.

Positively oozing panache, eh? Cyrano de Bergerac would have killed for lines like that. What's that you say? You don't READ Italian? Oh my inner Croda. FINE.

Hence it is necessary for a prince wishing to hold his own to know how to do wrong, and to make use of it or not according to necessity. Therefore, putting on one side imaginary things concerning a prince, and discussing those which are real, I say that all men when they are spoken of, and chiefly princes for being more highly placed, are remarkable for some of those qualities which bring them either blame or praise; and thus it is that one is reputed liberal, another miserly, using a Tuscan term (because an avaricious person in our language is still he who desires to possess by robbery, whilst we call one miserly who deprives himself too much of the use of his own); one is reputed generous, one rapacious; one cruel, one compassionate; one faithless, another faithful; one effeminate and cowardly, another bold and brave; one affable, another haughty; one lascivious, another chaste; one sincere, another cunning; one hard, another easy; one grave, another frivolous; one religious, another unbelieving, and the like. And I know that every one will confess that it would be most praiseworthy in a prince to exhibit all the above qualities that are considered good; but because they can neither be entirely possessed nor observed, for human conditions do not permit it, it is necessary for him to be sufficiently prudent that he may know how to avoid the reproach of those vices which would lose him his state; and also to keep himself, if it be possible, from those which would not lose him it; but this not being possible, he may with less hesitation abandon himself to them. And again, he need not make himself uneasy at incurring a reproach for those vices without which the state can only be saved with difficulty, for if everything is considered carefully, it will be found that something which looks like virtue, if followed, would be his ruin; whilst something else, which looks like vice, yet followed brings him security and prosperity.

Or, in shorter words more suitable for the Hard Of Thinking amongst you (and lord knows that covers most of the audience) "be as evil as you like, just don't risk your state for it". Ol' Niccolo would have kicked butt and taken names on the MBT.

[ March 28, 2002, 10:43 AM: Message edited by: PondScum ]

[Croda]

Ah, my dear Geoffrey:

This Nicholas had risen for a piss,

And thought that it would carry on the jape

To have his arse kissed by this jack-a-nape.

And so he opened window hastily,

And put his arse out thereat, quietly,

Over the buttocks, showing the whole bum;

And thereto said this clerk, this Absalom,

"O speak, sweet bird, I know not where thou art."

This Nicholas just then let fly a fart

As loud as it had been a thunder-clap,

And well-nigh blinded Absalom, poor chap;

But he was ready with his iron hot

And Nicholas right in the arse he got.

Brings a tear to mine eye.

[Guest PondScum]

Just to get everyone INTERESTED in literature, I have taken the liberty of sprucing up Machiavelli's timeless advice with a few EXAMPLES. I do hope it annoys the lot of you.

I say that all cesspudlians when they are spoken of, and chiefly knights for being more highly placed, are remarkable for some of those qualities which bring them either blame or praise; and thus it is that Seanachai is reputed liberal, OGSF miserly; Peng is reputed generous, Goanna rapacious; Stuka cruel, Persephone compassionate; PawBroon faithless, YK2 faithful; Panzer Leader effeminate and cowardly, Dalem bold and brave; Croda affable, Hiramhaughty; Lars lascivious, Yeknod chaste; Joe Shaw sincere, mensch cunning; Bauhaus hard, Mace easy; Berli grave, Elvis frivolous; one religious, another unbelieving, and the like.

[Berlichtingen]

Originally posted by PondScum:

Cyrano de Bergerac would have killed for lines like that.

Careful what claims you make, boy-o

[Berlichtingen]

Originally posted by PondScum:

I say that all cesspudlians when they are spoken of, and chiefly knights for being more highly placed, are remarkable for some of those qualities which bring them either blame or praise; and thus it is that Seanachai is reputed liberal, OGSF miserly; Peng is reputed generous, Goanna rapacious; Stuka cruel, Persephone compassionate; PawBroon faithless, YK2 faithful; Panzer Leader effeminate and cowardly, Dalem bold and brave; Croda affable, Hiramhaughty; Lars lascivious, Yeknod chaste; Joe Shaw sincere, mensch cunning; Bauhaus hard, Mace easy; Berli grave, Elvis frivolous; one religious, another unbelieving, and the like.

Now THAT works. Only took your four tries. I would have accepted anything from Dante, Goethe, Machiavelli, Rostand or Dumas

[dalem]

Originally posted by PondScum:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />...Croda affable...

</font>

[OGSF]

Originally posted by Croda:

This Nicholas just then let fly a fart

As loud as it had been a thunder-clap,

And well-nigh blinded Absalom, poor chap;

But he was ready with his iron hot

And Nicholas right in the arse he got.

Brings a tear to mine eye.

[Boo Radley]

Originally posted by Berlichtingen:

Now THAT works. Only took your four tries. I would have accepted anything from Dante, Goethe, Machiavelli, Rostand or Dumas

I'm glad I didn't suggest Beowulf.

[Simon Elwen]

lars there are 3 'sort of' challenges there , they are probably too subtle though.

I see that you have 9 games on the go . Well make it 10 and we will see who is pa-thet-ick

It is raining here , I'll save some for your parade

If you can win i may go and play in traffic , If I win you can buy yourself an umbrella

is that specific enough for you

[Guest PondScum]

Originally posted by Berlichtingen, may his withdrawal symptoms be long, twitchy, and accompanied by many hacking coughs:

Now THAT works. Only took your four tries. I would have accepted anything from Dante, Goethe, Machiavelli, Rostand or Dumas

Three. The fourth was merely a bastardized excerpt of the third for the edification of those inhabitants of the pool who cannot read long words, and pound on the space bar till they see their own name bolded.

But, what the hell, eh? I feel that the matchup of the three quotations to the three Old Ones is particularly pleasing. Viz, Monty Python for Peng, source of all amusement, Don Quixote for Seanachai, a squireless knight tilting at the windmills of his delusions, and Machiavelli for your own evil self.

[ March 28, 2002, 03:16 PM: Message edited by: PondScum ]

[**YK2**]

Originally posted by Croda:

Hiram's predicament was for his own protection, while yours was...well, as the man said, this isn't Usenet.

You lost me completely on that one.

Care to explain?

:confused:

[Lars]

Originally posted by Simon Elwen (who has obviously really strained to let this one splash into the Pool):

It is raining here , I'll save some for your parade

If you can win i may go and play in traffic , If I win you can buy yourself an umbrella

Pah!!!

You'll have to do better than that.

A little verve, a little wit, some style!

Come on laddie, put some effort into it, this isn't usenet.

But since you did show the proto-simian intelligence to point out that only half the pillocks around here are actual returning files these days, I shall wing a file of doom your way.

Later tonight.

When I'm drunk.

MwuHahahahaha…ha…ha…he…he…{whew…now, where did I put that copy of "Jabo!"?…}

[Croda]

Originally posted by YK2:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Croda:

Hiram's predicament was for his own protection, while yours was...well, as the man said, this isn't Usenet.

You lost me completely on that one.

Care to explain?

:confused: </font>

[Patchy]

Originally posted by YK2:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Croda:

Hiram's predicament was for his own protection, while yours was...well, as the man said, this isn't Usenet.

You lost me completely on that one.

Care to explain?

:confused: </font>

[Croda]

Originally posted by Persephone:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by YK2:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Croda:

Hiram's predicament was for his own protection, while yours was...well, as the man said, this isn't Usenet.

You lost me completely on that one.

Care to explain?

:confused: </font>

[Berlichtingen]

Originally posted by PondScum:

Monty Python for Peng, source of all amusement

Peng is worth a belly laugh or two

[**YK2**]

Originally posted by Croda:

Nope.

Nope? And to think we almost adopted you..

Tst Tst...

Originally posted by Persephone:

YK2, I don't think Croda can explain without getting himself into trouble.

Persephone

Ohhhhh Patch you understood his post!!

Obviously I missed something somewhere along the line. Care to point me in the right direction?

[Boo Radley]

I'm sitting here in front of my computer (obviously) looking at an old stock photo of the Cleaver family. There's Ward, the patriarch, June, always smiling. Wally, trying so hard to be an adult and the Beav, a bundle of trouble just waiting to happen. As I sit and ponder the photo, I come to the realization that June Cleaver is a babe.

[Lars]

Getting screwed on rent by Tenant - $950

Getting screwed on electric bill by Tenant - $120

Watching Tenant’s car get repo’d right before they have to move - PRICELESS.

{Ahhh…time for another Bourbon…}

[dalem]

Originally posted by Lars:

Getting screwed on rent by Tenant - $950

Getting screwed on electric bill by Tenant - $120

Watching Tenant’s car get repo’d right before they have to move - PRICELESS.

{Ahhh…time for another Bourbon…}

Hey, go easy on Seanachai, would you? He's had a rough time of it lately, and it's not really his fault.

[Leeo]

Originally posted by Lars:

Getting screwed on rent by Tenant - $950

Getting screwed on electric bill by Tenant - $120

Watching Tenant’s car get repo’d right before they have to move - PRICELESS.

{Ahhh…time for another Bourbon…}

And I always thought Berli was the Evil One.

[Seanachai]

Originally posted by PondScum:

Originally posted by Berlichtingen, may his withdrawal symptoms be long, twitchy, and accompanied by many hacking coughs:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Now THAT works. Only took your four tries. I would have accepted anything from Dante, Goethe, Machiavelli, Rostand or Dumas

Three. The fourth was merely a bastardized excerpt of the third for the edification of those inhabitants of the pool who cannot read long words, and pound on the space bar till they see their own name bolded.

But, what the hell, eh? I feel that the matchup of the three quotations to the three Old Ones is particularly pleasing. Viz, Monty Python for Peng, source of all amusement, Don Quixote for Seanachai, a squireless knight tilting at the windmills of his delusions, and Machiavelli for your own evil self.</font>

[AUSSIEJEFF]

Originally posted by Lars:

Getting screwed on rent by Tenant - $950

Getting screwed on electric bill by Tenant - $120

Watching Tenant’s car get repo’d right before they have to move - PRICELESS.

{Ahhh…time for another Bourbon…}

What??? 950 schmackaroos a week for a 10 x 12, 1 bedroom doss down? Lemme guess Lards. You're middle name is Screwge, right?? And the repo man is your cousin.......

I s'pose you'll be standing out the front of your investment with a sign saying "NEXT SUCKERS PLEASE" hehe.

Oh, before I ferget and if anyone is that way inclined - "HAVE A <SMALL><SMALL>HAPPY<BIG><BIG> EASTER!!"

AJ

[Michael Dorosh]

Originally posted by seanachai:

"Of course he is, child, but at least he's not Grog Dorosh!"

The bastard absolutely refused to take a hand in renaming the Thread!

Grog Dorosh! I'm calling you out, lad.

Do you even play the game, you almost dizzying spin of amorphous facts? You pensively Canadian cleric of Combat Mission minutia?

Silence! No Seconds, No Maps, No Scenarios, No Ladders!

A Quick Battle! Nothing between Grog Dorosh and eternity but me, and my steed!

goddamn it, Yeknod, where are you? We're Challenging a goddamn Grog

I can think of no great honour....that's spelled I-N-S-U-L-T ... for a Grog than to have the Mutha Beautiful Thread named after him; allow me to wipe a tear from me eye as I offer my humble thanks.

Quick Battle, eh? Ok, 1500 points, I attack, you defend - computer picked Combined Arms forces, you pick your nationality, pick any terrain flat/hilly, make sure its at least Moderately tree-ey, and we're good to get a go.

EDIT - ye Gods, ya git why hasn't my inbox been stuffed yet??????????????????????????????????

[ March 29, 2002, 01:00 AM: Message edited by: Michael Dorosh ]