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I beg Your Pardon, Madmatt Never Promised Us A Peng Challenge Garden


dalem

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Major computer crash last night -- multiple casualties.

Dead at the scene is one power supply.

The hard drive was unresponsive, and listed in critical condition at a local service center. If it dies, all turns will need to be resent (as well as another copy of that gawshawful email chain letter).

The case has outlived it's usefulness and will be forcibly retired.

Taking up the slack will be the new laptop, tomorrow morning.

That is all. Carry on.

Steve

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Originally posted by MrSpkr:

Major computer crash last night -- multiple casualties.

Dead at the scene is one power supply.

The hard drive was unresponsive, and listed in critical condition at a local service center. If it dies, all turns will need to be resent (as well as another copy of that gawshawful email chain letter).

The case has outlived it's usefulness and will be forcibly retired.

Taking up the slack will be the new laptop, tomorrow morning.

That is all. Carry on.

Steve

Ladies and Gentlemen!...Presenting the first graduate of tiny_tanker's School of Lame Excuses. Obviously, the curriculum has been expanded with some very exciting additions like Creative use of adjectives and adverbs to elicit sympathetic responses from your audience 101, 102, and 201 as well as the ever popular Age to Zen: Twentysix reasons that will make them want to believe. As top grad with Sigma Cum Laude, Alpha Beta Gamma, and Lambda Lambda Lambda honors, I think three cheers for our own MrSpkr would be in order: Hip Hip _________! , Hip, Hip _________! Hip, Hip __________! Applause everyone, applause.
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Dethroned?

DETHRONED?!?!

When did this happen? (Links, I need links, goddammit!)

Bloody well, it's for the best, really, you see I've always made the better usurper* than king. Have at ye, foul ice queen and your hoary (Sit down Bauha--wait, no, that's Dalem, wearing Bauhaus's socks, pinned to the scar tissue where his ears were cut off. That's not cool, that's not cool at all) consort! Come, my citizens, your benevolent and far more entertaining and sometime king has returned! Rally to me! Who will be the Petre to my Cromwell? The Ike to by Delano? The Tweedle-Dum, to my Tweedle-Dee? We shall storm the royal bedchamber!! (By the way, damned fine of you, Emma, for keeping the old portrait up, Lorak paintedt the thing with his tongue, took him eight weeks and he still can't taste anything but oregano, sorry I'm gonna have to pike ya {No, Dalem, her head, on a pike, quite literal, not a metaphor for anything, you've, well, you've got to calm down} as a symbol to anyone in the future who thinks that just because I only show up for thirty-three minutes a year somehow means I can be tossed out like yesterday's waffles)

The Cess must flow!!!

*Pronounced, please note, as the ultra-badass 'you-surper' and not the limp-wristed, hiram-metalsmithish 'uh-surper'.

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Originally posted by Boo Radley:

Elijah Meeks, the king who scarpered off or just an easily distracted scatterbrain?

You decide.

If I had any idea who you are, I'd probably be a little peeved right now, as it is, I'm incensed, and I don't mean Nag Champa. That's the pisser, no CM, at this point I'd load up a game and wipe your sorry butt all over the Crimea or Anzio or the Sea of Tranquility or wherever the current version is set, but I can't and that's a damned shame. So maybe it's time I pull down that old Spencer rifle and start killing Injuns.
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Originally posted by Aces_and_8's:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by MrSpkr:

Major computer crash last night -- multiple casualties.

Dead at the scene is one power supply.

The hard drive was unresponsive, and listed in critical condition at a local service center. If it dies, all turns will need to be resent (as well as another copy of that gawshawful email chain letter).

The case has outlived it's usefulness and will be forcibly retired.

Taking up the slack will be the new laptop, tomorrow morning.

That is all. Carry on.

Steve

Ladies and Gentlemen!...Presenting the first graduate of tiny_tanker's School of Lame Excuses. Obviously, the curriculum has been expanded with some very exciting additions like Creative use of adjectives and adverbs to elicit sympathetic responses from your audience 101, 102, and 201 as well as the ever popular Age to Zen: Twentysix reasons that will make them want to believe. As top grad with Sigma Cum Laude, Alpha Beta Gamma, and Lambda Lambda Lambda honors, I think three cheers for our own MrSpkr would be in order: Hip Hip _________! , Hip, Hip _________! Hip, Hip __________! Applause everyone, applause. </font>
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Originally posted by dalem:

Okay people, we have a CODE MEEKS.

Everyone remain calm, rely on your training, and keep your pants on. Or up. Or at least -- oh never mind about the pants Joe - we can clean them.

As for the rest of you, to your posts!

Aw, you named a code after me? That's the sweetest thing anyone's ever done. Do I get a certain color, too? I mean, I guess it'd be okay if there wasn't a certain color of flashing bulb, you know, and really intricate procedures. I guess.
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Originally posted by Elijah Meeks: Dethroned?

DETHRONED?!?!

When did this happen? (Links, I need links, goddammit!) BLAH BLAH BLAH....

I know what you need and it's not links!

You want my head on a pike eh?

And to think I kept your portrait above my bed hoping that one day you may return and claim your rightful place.

Of course I told Seanacoochie that I was only accepting the title of Queen until your return, but he was having none of it...

You are our Queen he said.. and if that Meeks has anything to say about it then he will have the Olde Ones to answer to..

As for me..I was honoured to have the chance at peeking in your wardrobe and sleeping in your bed... Of course I made changes, but nothing that you wouldn't appreciate. I even kept all your fine robes.. they are in the trunk by my bed for safe keeping....

*Sigh*

I just wish you had come back sooner.. I have become used to having my bath drawn in the mornings...

I know dalem can be a little sneaky at times.. I've caught him peeking through the door when I was just about to bathe... But I don't let on.. after all he brings such lovely oils from the market for my bath.. Yes... I shall miss some things..

Then again I do have the royal purse still.. I shall go on a mad shopping spree and spend as much as I can before you come for my head..

Oh yes... You may find that there are a few more men guarding the palace, and my chambers than normal.... they are strong men, both in mind and brawn.... And I really don't wish you, of all people, any harm....*sigh* But my hands are tied... They will protect their Queen come heaven and hell.. There's a years salary and all the beer they can drink for the man who chases this King wannabe back under the stone from where he crawled....

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Ah excellent..... Lars.

I have just taken delivery of some of the best armour around.. You'll be protected head to toe..

Bring me Meeks head on a platter, and you'll be rewarded greatly.

Oh and Lars .. before you go...stand over by the window.. I want to have a portrait done of you while your dressed to kill.

Now where is Lurker when he's needed?

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Oh, it's not that easy, lass. It's not just kerplow, plop, boom, let's do 2000 pts with random weather, there has to be a scenario made. And, er, it's bound time I got a copy of a more recent version than CMBO. Which means a good week of strutting, and mocking you, you who sheeted my bed with paisley, you little sicko. You who filled my piano with olive oil and now call it a bath. You who took the royal robes of office and shoved them into the communal urn of my ancestral line, thinking it to be a mere "chest" at the end of my bed. Oh no, and once I'm done annihilating the first red shirt you send at me, I'll tear through the rest like the archangel Michael's own rototiller (With side games with Berli and Dalem, of course, which I'll probably and likely lose, respectively, just because Berli's so damned good and Dalem out-crazy's even me).

Arrrrrrr.

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Originally posted by Elijah Meeks:

Which means a good week of strutting

Ohh goodie... will you wear your tight leopard print pants?

You who filled my piano with olive oil and now call it a bath.
Nice thought.. very daliesque!

You who took the royal robes of office and shoved them into the communal urn of my ancestral line, thinking it to be a mere "chest" at the end of my bed.
Oh dear.. I thought it was full of dust.... it took three attempts with the vacum cleaner to get rid of it..

Which is two attempts more than it will take my men to rid us of your sorry ass..

(With side games with Berli and Dalem, of course, which I'll probably and likely lose, respectively, just because Berli's so damned good and Dalem out-crazy's even me).

I see your beginning to seal your own fate..

Arrrrrrr.
You look good in those hair extensions and that ruffled shirt.. I don't suppose you'd mind posing for a last portrait while you still have your head?
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Originally posted by Elijah Meeks:

Oh, it's not that easy, lass. It's not just kerplow, plop, boom, let's do 2000 pts with random weather, there has to be a scenario made. And, er, it's bound time I got a copy of a more recent version than CMBO. Which means a good week of strutting, and mocking you, you who sheeted my bed with paisley, you little sicko. You who filled my piano with olive oil and now call it a bath. You who took the royal robes of office and shoved them into the communal urn of my ancestral line, thinking it to be a mere "chest" at the end of my bed. Oh no, and once I'm done annihilating the first red shirt you send at me, I'll tear through the rest like the archangel Michael's own rototiller (With side games with Berli and Dalem, of course, which I'll probably and likely lose, respectively, just because Berli's so damned good and Dalem out-crazy's even me).

Arrrrrrr.

Arrrrrrr! yourself, you gross pretenderator! I will harness the very forces of Atomic Persiflage and ride against thou for the honor of our Queen and the privilege of peeking at, I mean drawing up, I mean peeking at, I mean -dammit!-

Something about her bath anyway.

Step 1. Meeks acquires CM:AK

Step 2. Someone makes a scenario acceptable to both he and me

Step 3. I unleash the might of Unholy Atomic Persiflage upon squaw Meeks, yea, even unto his deathification.

dalem sends

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Originally posted by dalem:

Step 3. I unleash the might of Unholy Atomic Persiflage upon squaw Meeks, yea, even unto his deathification.

dalem sends

Why dalem.. you said that with such passion in your voice...

All this show of testosterone is making me feel rather faint... I think it's time I visited that other thread..

Nothing like spending some time with the tiddlers to bring my heart rate back to normal..

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Originally posted by YK2:

Why dalem... All this show of testosterone is making me feel rather faint...

dalem showing some testosterone? This begs several questions:

T) Just who's testosterone is it?

R) Do they know dalem has it?

E) How did he get it?

K) What the hell is he going to do with it?

I) What kind of container is it in?

E) is this in some warped way related to the Lars fox pee incident?

Inquiring minds want to know.

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Originally posted by Elijah Meeks:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Boo Radley:

Elijah Meeks, the king who scarpered off or just an easily distracted scatterbrain?

You decide.

If I had any idea who you are, I'd probably be a little peeved right now, as it is, I'm incensed, and I don't mean Nag Champa.</font>
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Originally posted by R Leete:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by YK2:

Why dalem... All this show of testosterone is making me feel rather faint...

dalem showing some testosterone? This begs several questions:

T) Just who's testosterone is it?

R) Do they know dalem has it?

E) How did he get it?

K) What the hell is he going to do with it?

I) What kind of container is it in?

E) is this in some warped way related to the Lars fox pee incident?

Inquiring minds want to know. </font>

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Oh God, and here I thought "Boo Radley" was simply a moniker, but no, it's actually the half-witted mockingbird killer himself. You imbecile, have you no clue what I meant with the rifle and native american metaphor? You moron, do you think there are Indians left to shoot? (To shoot, I said, you popsicle-brained, swallow-molesting, minor boil on an ugly girl) Let me draw you a map, in crayon, so you get it this time.

I'm getting the game. I'm going to then use the game to kick your, no no no, I'm not going to kick the game, wait until I end my sentence, you lackwitted steeplejack, I'm going to use the game to kick your ass. No, no, stop cowering, Christ man, we're seperated by thousands of miles and how much could being beaten with a CD hurt, anyway, you festering, cowardly, insignificant piece of unispired prose. I'm going to install the game on my computer and then I'm, oh forget it, does anyone speak Moronic in these parts? Lars? Could you translate for... Oh Christ, turn around at least, so I don't have to see that vacant look on your face, like you're counting jelly beans or, oh stop slobbering!

Damn you Emma, what have you done to this place? It's gotten so a guy has to wear leotards just to fit in with the retards. (I'm glad you like them, they're, uh, DKNY, you know, cost me a pretty penny but look at the way they accentuate the positive, if you get what I mean)

And as for you, oh earless nemesis, the only reason I kept reading the General Forum (A habit I'm proud to say I've quit. Had to take up smoking anyway), I can't wait till my pommies or my Dago-Wops or my Krauts or whatever it is gets to play Find the Wompus with your gall bladder.

Oh, it'll be nice to finally get back to slaughtering.

Arrrrrrr, off to the stupid thread. Er, stupider thread. Um, less intelligent. No, not that one, the one with all those damned stupid smilies.

Edited for one more, Arrrrrrrrr!

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Originally posted by Elijah Meeks:

stuff

My Gawd, the man posts verbose innanities like Seanachai. Like Seanachai on a very, very poor brand of methamphetamines...or perhaps he has a low grade fever...to match his low grade mentality.

Is that it, Meeksie-poo? Is ums sick? Can I fix it by massaging your skull with an aluminum baseball bat?

I think I feel slightly dazed from reading your post meself. It's almost like attending a 401k meeting that goes right through lunch.

But without the thrills.

I think I need some wine.

Have fun in the <small>goddam</small> thread. You'll fit right in there.

Just don't try to feed them. It makes them lethargic.

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