Seanachai Posted October 7, 2003 Share Posted October 7, 2003 Well, Gentlemen and Ladies, Grogs and Modders, dogs, chickens and Cesspoolers. I'm sure there's a certain amount of shock on the Forum. A certain amount of trauma and uncertainty. I'm sure many are wondering 'what does it all mean?', and how recent revelations regarding control of the Forum will affect each and every one of us. The revelation that the entire Board is controlled by the recently revealed 'Four Horsemen', or: Michael Dorosh, Andreas, Michael Emrys and Berlichtigen, well...I can only imagine the confusion, bordering on panic that must be taking place out there. Indeed, one anonymous poster recently said to me: poster's name deleted to protect the innocent: Go to hell. Without the protection you receive you're not worth spit.At the time I was bemused. I went to Berlichtigen and asked him: "What's he talking about? What protection?" And Berli told me: "That's us. Dorosh, Emrys, Andreas and I. We've been protecting you now for months. Years." I was stunned. "But why?" I asked the Evil One. "You're bloody awful annoying. We find that useful. It's all part of our carefully wrought plans of domination and evil. Now piss off and do me a turn." Well, let me hasten to tell you that you could have knocked me over with the newly ripped off, flung wing of a recently shot grouse. What terrible evil had I stumbled upon? What challenges would this mean for all mankind? More importantly, what would this mean for Canada? But then, as it normally does, my mind turned to other considerations. I mean, it's long been contended that the Cesspool was somehow involved with the Illuminati, and that the members were secretly involved with controlling the fate of Mankind, and, more importantly, Combat Mission. That it should suddenly be revealed that the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, figures so terrible that their coming would send the nations of the world reeling should contain two known Cesspool members (including one Olde One of the 'Pool), shouldn't be all that much of a surprise. But then, you have to stop, and consider. Emrys? I mean Emrys?! One of Four Vast Figures of Cataclysmic Impact and Possible Evil Intent? Bugger. I interspersed these thoughts, of course, with reflections on how hard it was to find a good Mortal Enemy these days (you know, one who'd stay focused and hate you properly, without zig-zagging like a drunkard all over the landscape of hatred), and what a thankless position being one of the Olde Ones of the Peng Challenge Thread was when it didn't even get you a proper savaging and accusations of evil control despite long hard hours of posting, but instead gave the nod to Berli, who can't be bothered to string more than 3 sentences together, or someone like Emrys, who, for the love of all the gods, is about as offensive as a bloody fox terrier. And, amidst my musings, of course, it occurred to me, as it has no doubt occurred to you: Well, if they're the Four Horsemen, which is which? So I began to ponder. Dorosh, of course, was easy. Dorosh is Pestilence. I mean, would anyone deny that Dorosh is a plague? Could any virus, bacteria, or germ be more omnipresent than Dorosh? Whether it's a thread on the 'Italian Navy in 1935', or 'The Proper Way to Square Dance' on the General Forum, Dorosh, will be there to infect it. The next choice was a bit more of a tussle. But after much thought, it became clear that Andreas was War. I can't think of any poor sod who's been at the heart of more bitter struggle than Andreas. I imagine that 'Hating Andreas' will be a test sport in the next Olympics. A lot of it, of course, comes from an almost magical inability to understand Andreas's sense of humour. It's like a combination of the all the most challenging aspects of the British and German senses of humour: A fine sense of the absurd, with an unwillingness to suffer fools, capped off with a certain happy willingness to hurt people in the name of a good joke. So Andreas was clearly War. Well, with that established, Berli, of course, was Death. That too fit, upon reflection. He's laconic, and quite untroubled by any passing concerns with people's 'issues'. Like it, don't like it, it's all the same to him. He's rather thoroughly unconcerned with how people take him. Expect to see him carrying a scythe at the next CM get together. Leaving, finally, Mr. Michael Emrys. Or Famine, as he's now known. Oh, many might say, 'Ha, so Emrys is Famine just because that's what's left, eh?' Not at all. When I consider Emrys, I am always taken aback at how little there is to work with there. And yet, someone (nameless), found him so worthy of dislike that he included him as one of the 'Figures' who control the CM Board. Emrys, clearly, leaves our sense of hatred starved, while demanding that we acknowledge him. He is inescapable. When we confront him, his very passivity and reasonableness leave us weak and hopeless. When it comes to hatred, there is simply nothing to get your teeth into. If you're sane, that is. I'm sure there are some who will gnaw the bones of anger and idiocy no matter how dust dry and meatless they might be. So, what then, can we conclude? Simply this, CMers. The End Times are upon us. Their Messengers are among us. We are witnesses to the Great Ride Out. But some of them are currently beta-testing CFAK, and such, so the major concern is whether we're going to be able to play Free French against Vichy French scenarios. If not, then I, for one, consider the End of the Universe to be at hand. And about time. Bad job all round, I say. If it wasn't for CM, there'd be damn little proof of anything other than random causality and Chaos Theory to blame everything on. Emrys. Sodding Emrys. Leaves me hungry to know what his bloody secret is. I mean, how is it Emrys is a figure of over-weaning Evil, and I don't even get a mention? Bloody cheek. You try, and you try. You ask for people's hatred, you invite people to hate you. You spend long hours posting annoying gibberish confident, at least, that Grogs will hate you, and what do you get? Some lunatic decides that Emrys is a controlling figure deserving of ultimate hatred. Emrys. HE DIDN'T EVEN COME IN THIRD IN THE THREE-WAY 'WHAT POPULAR CM POSTER DO YOU THINK SHOULD BE PUT TO DEATH?' CONTEST! [ October 23, 2003, 12:28 AM: Message edited by: Seanachai ] 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Redwolf Posted October 7, 2003 Share Posted October 7, 2003 And why is it that everybody forgets to flame me lately, anyway? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Dorosh Posted October 7, 2003 Share Posted October 7, 2003 :eek: 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted October 7, 2003 Author Share Posted October 7, 2003 Originally posted by redwolf: And why is it that everybody forgets to flame me lately, anyway? I'm with you, Redwolf. I move that we form the 'Axis of Alternate Evil Control, That May or May Not Be Controlling the CM Forum'. Bloody Emrys. Sticks in your craw, too, doesn't it?! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Dorosh Posted October 7, 2003 Share Posted October 7, 2003 And Vader's Jester says that I kiss ass to curry favour in order to not get banned or have threads deleted! Heh, he says my only saving grace is my spelling and ability to express myself. Poor sod, he should read masterpieces like yours, Seanachai. Wild, rambling, off topic chunks of poetry and wisdom...it never occurs to people that the ability to express one's self is the entire point behind this place??? Pestilence. I like that. Pretty cheeky of you, then, to think you could condemn two of the Four Horsemen to death at one time. Not that others haven't tried, mind, but you really thought you could do it! Where does Beman fit into all this? Rowing the boat on the Styx? He's looking for work, you know. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KnifeForkSpoon Posted October 7, 2003 Share Posted October 7, 2003 Seanachai , I am deeply enamoured of you. Would you please come out here and run for Gov.? you've got a wee bit of time left. If you win the election, you'd soon have all the hate you could love. KFS 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Firefly Posted October 7, 2003 Share Posted October 7, 2003 It's certainly a bad week for the BFC forums, first we lose the unnamed one and now I find that william amos is leaving for similar reasons. Mark my words, future historians will look back on this week as the start of the end times. BTW Seanachai, did you get that set-up I sent? We'd better get a move on, what with the Apocalypse being just around the corner and all. Unless you're hoping that the Four Horsemen will take pity and stay their hand until we're finished. [ October 07, 2003, 01:03 AM: Message edited by: Firefly ] 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted October 7, 2003 Author Share Posted October 7, 2003 Originally posted by KnifeForkSpoon: Seanachai , I am deeply enamoured of you. Would you please come out here and run for Gov.? you've got a wee bit of time left. If you win the election, you'd soon have all the hate you could love. KFS I would, lad, believe me, I would, but I don't want to upstage all the other clowns and lend them some semblance of legitimacy. And what would be the point? If Dorosh, Andreas, Berli and Emrys are preparing to ride out, California's going to be one of the first places to get the Cosmic Enema. Stands to reason. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted October 7, 2003 Author Share Posted October 7, 2003 Originally posted by Firefly: BTW Seanachai, did you get that set-up I sent? We'd better get a move on, what with the Apocalypse being just around the corner and all. Unless you're hoping that the Four Horsemen will take pity and stay their hand until we're finished. Apologies, lad. I have it, and will return it as soon as the stars have come back into alignment. As the beer's nearly gone, I'm sure they'll be properly aligned by tomorrow AM sometime. And never worry about the Horsemen, lad. I've got an 'in' with them. And Berli's not going to shuffle the World off as so much bad rubbish until he gets to watch every single last sodding turn of the game in which he is not simply beating me like a cracked bodhran, but humiliating me in a way that only a great soul like my self could even accept without going mad. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gaylord Focker Posted October 7, 2003 Share Posted October 7, 2003 They could pass as the four boredoms at best. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pzman Posted October 7, 2003 Share Posted October 7, 2003 I can just feel the love here. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted October 7, 2003 Author Share Posted October 7, 2003 Originally posted by Gaylord Focker: They could pass as the four boredoms at best. Gaylord, I would never seek to quibble with you when it comes to 'boring'. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gaylord Focker Posted October 7, 2003 Share Posted October 7, 2003 Originally posted by Seanachai: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Gaylord Focker: They could pass as the four boredoms at best. Gaylord, I would never seek to quibble with you when it comes to 'boring'. </font> 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gaylord Focker Posted October 7, 2003 Share Posted October 7, 2003 Ok you have to at least concede that personal attack should get to be Pestilence! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yeknodathon Posted October 7, 2003 Share Posted October 7, 2003 Ahem... Pestilence would need a fitting mount... Look no further, me fungal disease is particularly flakey today. Yeknod 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted October 7, 2003 Author Share Posted October 7, 2003 Originally posted by Yeknodathon: Ahem... Pestilence would need a fitting mount... Look no further, me fungal disease is particularly flakey today. Yeknod Second the donkey to be Dorosh's shudder mount. Michael, treat him gently. One owner, but that was himself. We can only imagine the horrors he's been subjected to. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gaylord Focker Posted October 7, 2003 Share Posted October 7, 2003 Who gets to be Ramses? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted October 7, 2003 Share Posted October 7, 2003 Originally posted by Firefly: now I find that william amos is leaving for similar reasons.Bah! I had nothing to do with that. Who is William Amos? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gaylord Focker Posted October 7, 2003 Share Posted October 7, 2003 Originally posted by Berlichtingen: Who is William Amos? Who brought the cool kid? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Firefly Posted October 7, 2003 Share Posted October 7, 2003 Originally posted by Berlichtingen: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Firefly: now I find that william amos is leaving for similar reasons.Bah! I had nothing to do with that. Who is William Amos? </font> 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted October 7, 2003 Author Share Posted October 7, 2003 Originally posted by Berlichtingen: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Firefly: now I find that william amos is leaving for similar reasons.Bah! I had nothing to do with that. Who is William Amos? </font> 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yeknodathon Posted October 7, 2003 Share Posted October 7, 2003 Originally posted by Seanachai: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Yeknodathon: Ahem... Pestilence would need a fitting mount... Look no further, me fungal disease is particularly flakey today. Yeknod Second the donkey to be Dorosh's shudder mount. Michael, treat him gently. One owner, but that was himself. We can only imagine the horrors he's been subjected to. </font> 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted October 7, 2003 Share Posted October 7, 2003 So, Seanachai, you gutless wonder, Is it your little sceme to avoid the END by not sending me a freakin' file? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andreas Posted October 7, 2003 Share Posted October 7, 2003 Hmmm - well at least being one of the four horsemen of the Apocalypse, I don't actually have to get off the bloody high horse until after doom has descended. All got its advantages. In the meantime, I go through my list of whiney cry-babies to tick off those for a public stoning who have not already spontaneously combusted in their shrill complaints about the forum mafia. Crikey - some days I wish I was running these forums, and not that bleeding-heart softie Madmatt. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jack Carr Posted October 7, 2003 Share Posted October 7, 2003 The Super members of the forum could branch off into different schools of thought and attract their own following of CM Forum members. I think the four or five "Super-Forum Members" should now be known as the "Super Friends". Each one of you should post what you stand for and the minor pee-on members could vote for you or against you on any given thread. In this way, no other member except the Super Friends would post anything other than "I vote for Michael Dorosh or I vote for Andreas". You would end up as the voice of the forum. Uuuhhhhhh.....uuuuhhhhhh....just kidding. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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