Hamsters Posted March 14, 2001 Share Posted March 14, 2001 Oh Priest are you in for a big surprise, no not in CM but here. HERE! We're going to take you as our squire. Yes, you've been so sweets to us and givens us a cutesie nickname and even played a semi-decent battle. Of coruse your troops are gamey and your tactics are Croda-Magnon but still, it's cute. Yes, you can washes our cars and rubs our corns and fetches our newspapers. Oh happy day. And one day, when the Pool gets itself in a tizzy, we'll throw you in a pit with another squire and yous two can battle it out for the honor of being no longer a pissboy. What say instead of squires we call them pissboys? Does that work? We don't need to change knights, that's still cute but squire is too, we don't know, honorable. These days with the comings and the goings and the lookee-loos whens the threads start up, we should call them pissboy. And Priest is our pissboy. Welcome aboard the Hamster train of loooooooooove, pissboy! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted March 14, 2001 Share Posted March 14, 2001 Originally posted by Hamsters: Grrrrr! is a challenge, Christ in a Corvair, don't you get it? Oh, sorry... my brain doesn't operate at a low enough level to understand Hamsterese. You might want to use some form of sentient communication. So, you want another match is it? The testicle retreival operation was a success then? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Priest Posted March 14, 2001 Share Posted March 14, 2001 It is a sad state when the title of Pissboy is an upgrade. Super (note sarcasm) ------------------ Sir are you sure you want to go to red alert...it would mean changing the bulb -Kryton of Red Dwarf Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted March 14, 2001 Share Posted March 14, 2001 Originally posted by Croda: Feel free to continue to patronize me during my run for 2,000. Is this some kind of race? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Croda Posted March 14, 2001 Share Posted March 14, 2001 It's some kind of a race, except it has no end, the competitors suck ass, and the only way to get a prize is to drop out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted March 14, 2001 Share Posted March 14, 2001 Originally posted by HolgerDK: No, of course not. I've never ever played the game - I just like to post to random bulletin boards on the 'Net. Really Seanachi, it's important to take your medication EVERY day. It is precisely because of taking my medication regularly that I am what I am today. I suppose it might have been more appropriate and productive if any of them had actually been prescribed for me, or even, in fact, issued by a doctor. A guy named Seanachai is being critical of somebody else's handle? Peculiar language? OK, look at the name of the thread. It says "Peng goes to Sweden". With me so far? Do you think maybe, just maybe the peculiar language could be...Swedish? If you rub both of your brain cells together furiously Seanachai you might just get a spark. Sorry, but being of non-Scandinavian descent here in Minnesota, we are taught from a very early age to ignore all forms of the Squarehead languages, as this just encourages them. This necessary regional adaptive screening led me to see your attempts at communication as little better than random symbols and letters, rather than communication in the language of our very own Geier (although we must admit, the distinction there is so fine as to be microscopic). As for your handle, my wondering about it was merely an offhand, incomplete train of thought that was probably awkward for lesser intellects to follow. I was wondering to myself how a Heraldite would have hit upon one of Charlemagne's Knights for a screen handle. But perhaps the genesis was something more disappointingly mundane, such as it actually being your name. I am intrigued by this sudden appearance of the Zeppo Heraldite. Does he play like Bauhaus, that is, badly, but still managing to wrest victory away from his betters, or like Moriarity, to say, play a good, solid game but have fate cheat him time and time again, or like Berli, that is, by playing all humanity and figure that accounting will sort them into the proper circle of Hell as the numbers roll in? What say the Heraldites? And why was this one kept locked in the figurative attic for so long before making his appearance here among us? ------------------ Tremble, tyrants and you perfidious opprobrium of all the parties, Tremblez! your parricidal projects finally will receive their prices! But these sanguinary despots, But these accomplices of Berli, All these tigers which, without pity, Bauhaus the centre of their mother! We will enter the career When our elder is not there any more, We will find there their dust And the trace of their virtues [This message has been edited by Seanachai (edited 03-14-2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted March 14, 2001 Share Posted March 14, 2001 Hamsters, YOUR squire may be a pissboy, I haven't your extensive experience with him, but MY squire, Agua Perdido, is a SQUIRE and right proud of it. In short, your idea is really stupid and you should be shot at dawn ... and again at sunset. Joe ------------------ I HAVE LOST A BLOOD HAMSTER TO PETERNZ. MY SIG FILE IS HIS. PLEASE TICKLE MY FANCY BY GOING TO DER KESSEL .IF YOU GO HE MIGHT STOP BEATING ME AND USING MY POOR INNOCENT BODY FOR HIS OWN DEVIOUS PLEASURES Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted March 14, 2001 Share Posted March 14, 2001 Originally posted by Croda: I'd like to alert everyone that 3 posts ago was my 1000th post, proving that volume is in no way related to quality. Feel free to continue to patronize me during my run for 2,000. You only have @130 posts less than myself? You should seek help, this is an all too clear warning sign that only the most dysfunctional would ignore. Especially as a great many of yours on on threads outside the Peng Challenge Thread. ------------------ Tremble, tyrants and you perfidious opprobrium of all the parties, Tremblez! your parricidal projects finally will receive their prices! But these sanguinary despots, But these accomplices of Berli, All these tigers which, without pity, Bauhaus the centre of their mother! We will enter the career When our elder is not there any more, We will find there their dust And the trace of their virtues Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Agua Perdido Posted March 14, 2001 Share Posted March 14, 2001 Originally posted by Croda: Feel free to continue to patronize me during my run for 2,000. YOU ARE ON THE WAY TO DESTRUCTION. (Personally, I find it hard not to be patronizing when speaking to a simp like Croda.) SOMEBODY SET US UP THE BOMB! Today's updates involve: arty, arty, and arty. (I've even got Artie Shaw's version of "Frenesi" going through my head while I write.) Seanachai has cleverly fallen into my trap by stopping to slay my fleeing defenders while I dump a wheel-barrow full of mortar fire on his head. Croda and I continue to flounder in the snow, but I'm in the nice, warm buildings and he's out playing in the fields of fire-for-effect. I quite considerately set one of his buildings aflame to help avert the looming energy crisis (provides warmth, plus it's one less building to heat). I think he's responding with his own mortar fire, but I can't tell what his target is--it's certainly nothing of mine. Maybe he's snuck some troops around to my flanks and they require his signature Crodastic leadership barrage. I'm searching for stevetherat's remaining defenders using recon-by-fire. I think they're in some woods by the VL, but I won't know for sure until I blast one of their corpses high enough so I can see it over the trees. I'll bring a strainer to recover the bodies for burial. As for DekeFentle, I've been shamefully slow in finishing my deployment. The file doesn't hold my interest because there's no arty falling yet. I suppose the sooner I get it done, the sooner I can start shelling him. Hey, now that's motivational! I'll send it tonight. Agua Perdido [Edited to include better treeburst graphics] ------------------ Feel the pain of outlaw cinema! [This message has been edited by Agua Perdido (edited 03-14-2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iskander Posted March 14, 2001 Share Posted March 14, 2001 Time for a sing-a-long! No, wait… that’s some other gamey git’s tagline. Start again: Cesspoolers Losing to Me: … Cesspoolers Losing to Me Badly with No Grace: The Lawyer (no bol… forget it) and I having now destroyed a quarter-years output of the Ruhr and Detroit are reduced to throwing pinecones at one another in the center of the map. He is such a newbie as to mistake the movements of my panicked crews and empty scout cars as a “flag rush.” Trowel that tripe on your firm’s gent’s room, but not in front of me. And I noticed you pulled that MkV out faster than your fountain pen from your legal briefs when presented with a chance to meet your pederast client in the pokey. Since he has proved too dim to surrender, in the 2-3 turns we have left I fear a draw. BeatenNZopen and I will continue to rain arty down upon our frozen-in-place WWI positions for as long as the ammo holds out. Then, we shall – pace Lawyer – gamily rush our crews at the flags. It’s the games where you don’t have to think that I admire most. And speaking of no thought, mensch has begun the Barrage of St. Rickets. My men cower and wet themselves under the onslaught. Or was it on the underslaught? No matter. In one or two turns his tubes will be dry *ahem* and my heroic but somewhat syphilitic defenders will rise from their foxes – er, foxholes – and cause Much-Pain-and-Suffering™ on his now under-supported spankertruppen. In an effort to do something, anything at all, LorakwhowillnotbeappearinginLOTR has taken to shelling his own men, to which my ‘Murcans would give a mighty “hurrah!” were they not busily shooting those he is not. Pass out some ashtrays, Lorak: your guns, both fixed and mobile, will be smoking soon. That Person Always Sitting Down has yet to receive a format, much less a setup, but it still feels like I’m winning this one. And now… Steve the Rat. Note that I do not even attempt to make a funny from his name. This one really, really has me puzzled. Except for a tiny smattering of arty a few turns ago (which I now believe to have come from my game with that Kiwi-type person), he is nowhere to be seen. Given my dispositions on the map, either he is preparing the Great Mother Peng of all end-runs (with what forces?) or he has his men in a tiny village packed tighter than the voices in Hamster’s head. Or… he bought just one assault boat or something just to watch me creep across the map so he could boast to the ‘Pool what a fool he made of me… nah, he’s not that clever. Forgot for a moment there that he’s English. Sheesh. ------------------ "I send you a kaffis of mustard seed, that you may taste and acknowledge the bitterness of my victory." "Legal advice is very often divorced from reality in my humble opinion" - BTS Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Herr Oberst Posted March 14, 2001 Share Posted March 14, 2001 Originally posted by Berlichtingen: Is this some kind of race? If this (Crawdad's postings) is a race, then it's the best argument for genocide I have ever heard... ------------------ To the last I grapple with thee; from hell's heart I stab at thee; for hate's sake I spit my last breath at thee... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Herr Oberst Posted March 14, 2001 Share Posted March 14, 2001 To my current opponents: No you monkey-faced gits, you will not be receiving turns from me this night. I will be at home with my ice cold Stoly Crystal, my DVD player, and my newly arrived copy of Stalingrad... So if you're looking for a turn, BITE ME! Crawdad - Consider another 24 hours of life for your froggies a boon, which I am generally loathe to grant, but there are larger matters at hand. (NO BAUHAUS, I SAID LARGER! NOW PUT THAT THING AWAY) Barbarella - Those purple heart boxes on your right flank might live another night, and you can tell those platoons on your left to save their ammunition. My troops facing them will not be sacrificing themselves in the vain hopes that your troops will slip in the blood and entrails and impale themselves on their own bayonets. Other non-Poolers (3) - Someday you may cease lurking and challenge, but probably not. If I'm running at 50% win rate against the 'Pool and shellacking the lot of you, you may just want to continue cowering over in the corner. I know you lurk, otherwise there would be no SOMEFINK's in the Emails. ------------------ To the last I grapple with thee; from hell's heart I stab at thee; for hate's sake I spit my last breath at thee... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted March 14, 2001 Share Posted March 14, 2001 Originally posted by Seanachai: What say the Heraldites? And why was this one kept locked in the figurative attic for so long before making his appearance here among us? Well, since the gutless wonder refuses to play me, I have no first hand knowledge of his ability. He can beat the AI and Moriarty... of course that really doesn't tell you anything. I have it on good authority that Goanna is making him his bitch Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lawyer Posted March 15, 2001 Share Posted March 15, 2001 Originally posted by Iskander: The Lawyer (no bol… forget it) and I having now destroyed a quarter-years output of the Ruhr and Detroit are reduced to throwing pinecones at one another in the center of the map. Since he has proved too dim to surrender, in the 2-3 turns we have left I fear a draw. Quit the hype-gripe and send the next turn, you moron. I've been watching you dance and prance with all the new nancy boyz in the 'pool for the past TWO DAYS, but NO TURN despite being reminded (sorry, "mind" isn't part of your vocabulary). I wanna collect my VICTORY. Got it? You may yet figure out that a Panther can handle a few crewbies and two VW buses with hippie signs on them. Feck the whales, you git. Oh, and you shall pay dearly for blowing away that crapper building where my guys were having a quiet comfort break. There's ****e sprayed all over the place now. Didn't you see that kraut Red Cross flag flying? You know, the red one with the funny looking black Z-cross in the middle? Idjit! ------------------ There are good reasons why the movie was called "Patton" rather than "Hodges". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HolgerDK Posted March 15, 2001 Share Posted March 15, 2001 Originally posted by Seanachai: And why was this one kept locked in the figurative attic for so long before making his appearance here among us? It's all a matter of having the time to play. You see, Moriarty and Bauhaus each have minions to do their work. Berli just plays whenever he wants - work or not - and gets away with it because everyone at the Herald is afraid of him. I had to completely change careers just to get the time to PBEM. As to my style of play - email address is in the profile if you care to discuss terms. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hamsters Posted March 15, 2001 Share Posted March 15, 2001 Originally posted by Berlichtingen: Oh, sorry... my brain doesn't operate at a low enough level to understand Hamsterese. You might want to use some form of sentient communication. So, you want another match is it? The testicle retreival operation was a success then? Yes, we managed to find them right next to our nipples. All of which had been thrown into a pit. Dug in search of what seems to be pig****. Thank you, Mr. Berli, sir, we've now reattached these and have managed, via counselling and other less savory methods, to forget all about how badly you whomped us. We are now prepared to fight again and again and again but no more than that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Madmatt Posted March 15, 2001 Share Posted March 15, 2001 Okay, time to go somewhere else (getting over the reply limit here) and remember, I like catchy Thread titles. So start up a new Cess thread, first person to start one gets the honor...If you could call it that... Madmatt Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bauhaus Posted March 15, 2001 Share Posted March 15, 2001 Originally posted by HolgerDK: It's all a matter of having the time to play. You see, Moriarty and Bauhaus each have minions to do their work. Berli just plays whenever he wants - work or not - and gets away with it because everyone at the Herald is afraid of him. I had to completely change careers just to get the time to PBEM. As to my style of play - email address is in the profile if you care to discuss terms. You can send holdyerDK a set up all ya want, he's still too much of a namby pamby to take you up on the challenge. I've been waiting since the early 50's for a set up from the felcher. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PeterNZer Posted March 15, 2001 Share Posted March 15, 2001 Sorry Jeff, with so many people loosing to me I find it difficult to remember everyone's names. Esp. when their nickname is dull. Will get onto it PeterNZ ------------------ - Official owner of the sig files of Dalem, Croda and JeffShandorf - Der Kessel scenario design group Combat Vision movies Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted March 15, 2001 Share Posted March 15, 2001 Originally posted by HolgerDK: It's all a matter of having the time to play. You see, Moriarty and Bauhaus each have minions to do their work. Berli just plays whenever he wants - work or not - and gets away with it because everyone at the Herald is afraid of him. I had to completely change careers just to get the time to PBEM. As to my style of play - email address is in the profile if you care to discuss terms. HoldyourDK, I sir, do NOT play at work (and yes, I am feared [though I don't know why]). You on the otherhand (the one that isn't holding your DK) are a man of lame excuses Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts