Jim Boggs

Well, well. I guess the circus is in town and the "Clown Wagon" has broken down. I point out the unseemly behavior of a certain individual in slandering my good name and reputation built on all things good and decent, and what do I get? A veritable deluge of innuendo and insensitive remarks about my age. But...HAH! I laugh at your meager insults. I smirk at your lame attempts to besmirch my honor I cackle at your abilities to do math I chortle at the lack of caring that is displayed when one of your fellow members is attacked in such an unseemly manner. I laugh out loud at the disrespect shown for one who has always lived by the highest ideals and maintained the cleanest virtues. So there you have it. Make sport of the victim. Kick the downtrodden. Hang the innocent. Spank your monkey... okay, forget that one. Anyway, I will expect no more sympathy from you lot.

Well, it has been some time since you sent your last turn. I probably need to bring you up to date on a few things that have happened since: 1) Infantry no longer line up in long lines and exchanges vollies with their flintlocks. 2) Cavalry charges with sabers and lances are no longer in style. There are new contrivances such as tanks, armoured cars, and machine guns. Perhaps we should start a new game and you can experience these new developments? We can keep it Shaw like (ie; simple) and not include air power, as I am sure this concept will take you a great deal of time to understand. If you need time to "study up" on these new techniques, I will understand. Of course it will entail reding books, so I will also understand your reluctance to burn up too many brain cells making the effort.

What was I thinking? That you could possibly see a birthdate and figure out someone's age? I can hear you now "Damn it, Jim, I'm an idjit, not a mathematician"

Okay, this is just about the limit. There is no doubt in my mind at where this originated. I get home last night and guess what is in my mail? A feckin invitation to join AARP!!! This smacks so much of conspiracy that I burned my swift rowboat in protest. I KNOW it was one of you lot that tuned my name in, as clearly from the date of my birth (which I so proudly display in my profile) that I am WAY too young to be in AARP!!! So now the job becomes one of tracking down the lying liars whose lies have built a network of lies that surmounts any lying effort I have seen (since my last visit to the PGF). There WILL be an investigation! There will be heads rolling. There will be vengeance and retribution meted out in such a way as to put any further attempts to stain my honor at such risk that the effort will not be worthwhile. Fortunately, the list can be narrowed down a great deal. 1) Not everybody even knows what AARP is. 2) Very few of you lot that know what it is could spell it properly. To he/she who is responsible for this travesty. BE AFRAID!! BE VERY AFRAID!!!!! PS-I will say that the picture of Joe Shaw on the cover in his plus 4's was rather startling to behold. I did not realize Joe was on the Board of Directors.

So Axe, did you ever play Beach Volleyball? You would make a helluva set-up guy. *Invokes Mercy Rule and walks away*

A toast of pure water to my brave hurricane brother. We have met the slings and arrows of Mother Nature and emerge triumphant, proud, and highly intoxicated. :cool: Bring on Ivan! I have slaughtered them by the hundreds on the plains of the Russian steppes. :mad: :mad: :mad: Of this I vow, no pure water for Ivan. :mad: :mad: :mad: Gotta go, the water is bubbling, that means it's ready. :cool:

Well ya know Joe, I find it quite odd that after all the various encounters we have had on the PGF that you would fail to mention my name in any of your encounters with severe flatulance. Not that I don't spend an inordinate amount of time there, jumping in swiftly to denounce those that would make a mockery of our Justicar. Is that worthy of a mention? Not to Joe Shaw. Despite all my best efforts to gently wean you off your left thumb, you would ignore my efforts and sacrifices. Oh well, what is recognition after all? Jim Jim Jim Jim Jim Jim Jim

You mean your water purification recipe? :confused: Worked great. Like I said in Dave H's other favorite Thread, the blindness was only temporary. I think we'll probably have to keep purifying for quite some time, you know, get ready for Ivan. It could take months. Oh yeah: :mad: :mad: :eek: :mad:

That explains it. My wife's thongs are shoes you idjit. :mad: You want a game? Send a set-up. Maggette :mad: :mad:

My, my, what a foul mouthed little hussy you are. Your thong must be just a bit too tight for that wide ass of yours. :mad: Now run along and knit some doilies or some such, which is more in line with your abilities.

So, who's the new girl? :mad:

I am SO disappointed in your post. I had apparently placed you on such a high pedestal that there was an oxygen deprivation issue involved. Now look here Mr T, you know I have been your biggest fan, and to see this kind of slap dash, hurriedly thrown together, lowest common denominator type humor from you is.... well, disillusioning. I know you can do better. Now try again and this time don't settle with "phoning it in".

Your eyes are BLUE??? Couldn't tell through that red haze.

Good One! How about YeknodaShaw?

I think I liked you better when you were more pathetic. Not that you aren't pathetic now, but earlier you were extremely pathetic. So where's my turn? Do I have to wait until you finish successfully arguing with a box of rocks?

So the Wurlitzer comment was correct then. When I said you were the Great Ohioan Intellect, it was just my playful way of saying Forgot your depends again, didn't you Radley?

Indeed it would, if you were. But, you aren't, so we won't. Clear on that, Wet Willie? </font>

I agree, only I would say you guys and your piss poor naive conspiracy theories. I think it provides just a bit more emphasis. Clearly you are not the Gaylord they are searching for.

What is UP with all this Mr. Boggs crapola? Most Exalted and Intellectually Gifted One will suffice. I do not need to take on airs.

Sheesh! Take a few days off to attend a Hurricane Party (Thanks Snarker for that water purification recipe *HIC*. The blindness was only temporary!) and when I get back what do I find? Drop Bears, Vitalis, Brylcreme, Vaseline, and some kind of hair styling gel for pods. Looks like I'll have to purify a helluva lot more water tonight. Okay, okay, I know all you care about are When am I gonna get my turn? Here's a list of projected turns going out: Boo-Tonight fer shure. Lars-Tonight fer shure. Noba-Tonight fer shure. dalem-This week fer shure. Papa Khann-This week fer shure Joe Shaw-YOU OWE ME!!!!! Seanachai-January 2005 If your name isn't on the list, you may now return to the obscurity you so rightfully deserve. GAWD, I got a headache. And actually having to work most of today HAS NOT HELPED!!! I need to pound some more musicians into total obnoxiousness. Damn nylon string playing wussies!!!! PS-Nefariousers???????????

WHAT'S THIS?? There is a gentleman in the Cesspool? How was this allowed to happen. Where is Joe asleep at the wheel Shaw? Where was the blessing Justicar when this scoundrel infiltrated our ranks? Well Joe certainly blessed the pooch on this one. This is so blessed up. What a blessing idjit! So who among us is this gentleman? Who is this scurrilous dog that wanders so innocently among us? Joe Shaw!!! You better get your blessing arse back to work. Otherwise we'll have to depend on Boo Radley (it somehow seems appropriate to use depends in a sentence involving Boo) and that ain't cause for much hope.

Oh, hanging out at Sprockets now? You like those black tights? Sheesh! What a perv...

It's too late now. Joe </font>

He didn't bold his name. *Sighs* Another turnless week from the Justicar.

Well, since you put it so reasonably. How could I refuse?