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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by OGSF: Oops! Correction - 33% v 8%. There, much better. Full FOW means we can't see units not in line of sight. It doesn't relate to the Morale and Victory stats on the console - you twittering hairless mole. And the polka party will arrive, if you manage to exchange another few turns. And while your green Frenchies (eeuuww!) might be ready for the chicken dance now, there may be a drastic reduction in their numbers before they find partners to dance with. BTW, my boys have been pacticing to "Psycho Chicken",so be afraid....be very afraid. OberGrupenBloodyStompinFeuhrerBastard <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> OGSF, I hate to say it but victory is covered by FOW. You could both think you hold the position and, in reality, it's contested. I have nothing else to say. Ya, qoute that you rat bastards. ------------------ I've got far more annoying things than that up my sleeve. -Meeks You must wear awfully loose shirts to fit an oompah band up your sleeve. -Chrisl

Hate to say it, old chap, but Berli beat me, not vice verse. Thanks for the sentiment, though. Oh, and there's one thing I neglected to address, you people have a demented definition of sex. I mean, seriously, not everything in life is done in a sitting position in front of a computer. But you can be assured, Jefe, that I will be copulating with a gorgeous Cantonese girl the next time I send you a turn. Oh yes, we will be in flagrante delicto while I am planning and watching the destruction of your forces. Merry Christmas early. ------------------ I've got far more annoying things than that up my sleeve. -Meeks You must wear awfully loose shirts to fit an oompah band up your sleeve. -Chrisl

It would be nice, however, if CM introduced another level of troop condition, that being slightly wounded. This would be a more realistic representation of a squad's fighting capabilities and could have the same effect as when a MG moves and it has to leave behind ammo because it's lost crew members. ie, You have a squad of 8 guys but 2 are wounded, if they move from their position, the 2 become casualties. Or perhaps wounded could keep up with a move command but are lost with a run command or, possibility #3, wounded can't be lost but merely have a reduced FP. I would also like to see CM2 model KIA vs WIA percentages according to actual events and not randomly. ------------------ I've got far more annoying things than that up my sleeve. -Meeks You must wear awfully loose shirts to fit an oompah band up your sleeve. -Chrisl

It was the time zones more than anything, my boys weren't even awake yet. I had 161m and 156m kills in a game against Freyland with some 'zooks, but nothing longer. ------------------ I've got far more annoying things than that up my sleeve. -Meeks You must wear awfully loose shirts to fit an oompah band up your sleeve. -Chrisl

Another Penger and a hell of a post. This post made me build my Shrine to Peng. <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by MrPeng: There was a time when the written word didn't require pictures to convey meaning. Those of you who may have picked up a book in which the only picture was perhaps a dust jacket photo of the author might remember this time. It existed somewhere between children's story books and your first email or BBS smilie. If you recall correctly this time included entire words, spelled correctly, and typically some sort of punctuation which would separate the sentences into what many teachers used to call "complete thoughts." Sometimes the author would use a rhetorical device ( some early rhetorical devices ran at only 33MHz!) with funny old Latin names like "praeter itio," which I won't mention. Sometimes authors used nice techniques called Irony, Satire and Sarcasm (an ascending tri-colon). What seems odd to us about these techniques today is that the words that the author used conveyed the meaning. Certainly there were thickies that didn't quite "get it" when Irony would smack them accross the noggin, but that's precisely because they were thick. One despairs that even the cunning and naughty MrWinky, the Cheeky Monkey, could not raise the intellect of the thick to a level of ironic awareness. And so it is with our little friend Sarcasm. It is often proclaimed quite loudly that sarcasm is difficult to parse from the written word, and so we should make our intent plain by adding MrWinky, or perhaps even a MrRazz to make double-extra super sure that the target of the sarcastic remark is "in the know." WARNING: the following statement is inregard to American English, which in my Ignorance is the only language I am able to speak and write. It is not in any way, shape or form meant to impugne any other language spoken here. END OF WARNING. The English Language is rich: it has evolved over centuries, borrowing from, stealing from and swallowing wholesale entire other languages. It is a Monster of a language. We have at least two ways of naming absolutely everything, dependent upon from which root language you care to select the name. We have so many ways of saying the same thing that it seems we cannot help but stumble accross a way to convey what we mean with only the words. And yet... OFFICIAL NOTE: the following does not fall under the above WARNING. That bit is over. And yet, we have become so careless, so self absorbed and in such a hurry to get our two cents in; such a blasted, egomaniacal rush, that we ignore the meaning of what others write. We do not take the time to digest the written word. We do not allow ourselves the opportunity to read what the other guy has written, so busy are we in our sweat to "respond" to our nemesis, that we now require a little helper to convey the meaning for us. It seems the symbols we all agreed upon to convey our meanings are too difficult to decipher. The ugly truth is that the helpers do not help. They diminish our capacity to communicate effectively with one another. They are frauds. The writer tosses off a smilie because he is worried the reader won't understand the written word. The reader tosses away the smilie because the writer didn't really mean it. The writer should take the time to write what he means. The reader should take the time to understand. Smilies do nothing to enhance our discourse. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> ------------------ I've got far more annoying things than that up my sleeve. -Meeks You must wear awfully loose shirts to fit an oompah band up your sleeve. -Chrisl

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by jshandorf: If you can believe it, I have actually become less intelligent. Yes, you may have thought this was impossible without some kind of resultant death due to lack of brainpower to operate the various body parts necessary to keep me alive but I have become so stupid as to be too stupid to realize that I should be dead. This is a glorious day for idiots everywhere! One small step for assthumbs, one giantleap for assthumbkind! Jefe<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Well, while I was up on the mountain, a burning bush and I had an interesting conversation and I was pleasantly reminded of something I all ready knew. I'm sure others of you realize it but take a moment to think about how cool this place is? I hate to move into a self-congratulatory mode but the quality of freelance humor here, the manner and types of it, they're astounding. We have fads, we expiriment with different forms, it's amazing, it really is. When the Klodons from Klodar come to our planet in 20 million years, one of them will discover the entire contents of the Pool, in fourteen editions, etched on sheets of hammered nickel, bound in rhinocerous hide and shod with titanium, and they will weep upon seeing the beauty of it. We've really got something here, and I just want to take a moment to appreciate it. Right, all done, now back to being disgusted with the whole moronic lot of ya. ------------------ I've got far more annoying things than that up my sleeve. -Meeks You must wear awfully loose shirts to fit an oompah band up your sleeve. -Chrisl

Originally posted by Slapdragon: <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR> Because 1/2 the FP of most squads is counted for in automatic weapons that are either crew served, or have distributed ammo supplies, somthing the sharpshooter does not have.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> There are a number of rifle-only squads that have each guy with a rifle and have ammo of 40. How could the ammo be better distributed? Did each squad have a dozen "Ammo Porters"? It makes no sense that these guys have more ammo, especially considering that the ammo is abstracted and regular foot soldiers are going to spend it more liberally. ------------------ I've got far more annoying things than that up my sleeve. -Meeks You must wear awfully loose shirts to fit an oompah band up your sleeve. -Chrisl

Oh, and if you haven't read the "Placebo Patch?" thread, you should, those guys are goddamn geniuses. I think we should lobby BTS to make one of us a moderator, with the prohibition that the person can only moderate the Pool. The choices are between Berli, Seanachai, Peng and Andreas as none of them would seriously abuse the power (Like I would) and they're not completely insane (Like Pawbroon and, once again, me) neither are any of them pure evil, except Berli, who is so evil as to make the issue unimportant. ------------------ I've got far more annoying things than that up my sleeve. -Meeks You must wear awfully loose shirts to fit an oompah band up your sleeve. -Chrisl

Minor inconsistency with the "SS ammo is abstracted so it's ok" argument: All ammo is abstracted, so why would a sharpshooter go into battle with less ammo than his counterpart in a rifle squad? When I play, I grab my Ami squad and it's got 40 ammo, what do these guys conserve their shots more than sharpshooters? Are sharpshooters smaller guys so they can't carry as much ammo? It's the same gun, in most cases. ------------------ I've got far more annoying things than that up my sleeve. -Meeks You must wear awfully loose shirts to fit an oompah band up your sleeve. -Chrisl

Just so you all know, I haven't responded to anyone's PBEMs, I have them, I'm busy, so bugger off and stop resending them in those, "Um, in case you haven't received this, here's the last turn," E-mails. Slapdragon, if you send me a set-up, I'll be happy to put you in a position that even modern medical science will not be able to fix. Whizkid, didn't you post on the main forum that you're 69 years old? What kind of a moron plays video games when he's 69? Listen, old man, turn around, go find your nearest toothless cronie and start a game of bridge. You can taunt them with lines like, "I'm gonna come over there and beat you to death with my dentures," or "You're gonna need Full Body Viagra when I'm done with you" or even the ever-popular "I've had colostomy bags with better playing ability than you!" Watch out for that last one, as it involves an exclamation point and, at your age, you really should lay off those things. By the way, in the last three days I've had sex 11 times, climbed a mountain and worked with only 13 hours of sleep. That pretty much overmatches your experiences for the last three years, don't it? Now there is an issue I've been meaning to take care of, that of the momma-joke telling Mensch. Once Mensch stops sobbing about the cancellation of The Golden Girls, finally realizes he's got a solid pair of tin-plated cajones and sends me a setup, I'm going to destroy him. Yes, Mensch, I'm going to tear your head off your neck, shove said head deep into the ass of the nearest constipated bovine, sharpen that pencilneck with my trusty jackknife and use it to write, "Died Trying" on your tombstone. ------------------ I've got far more annoying things than that up my sleeve. -Meeks You must wear awfully loose shirts to fit an oompah band up your sleeve. -Chrisl [This message has been edited by Elijah Meeks (edited 11-03-2000).]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Major Tom: This is primarily due to training and equipment, which the Rumanains, Hungarians and Italians had none of. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> As usual, my disclaimer about being a neophyte when it comes to the Eastern Front, but I thought there was a very well regarded Italian army that fought the Russians to a stand still? Was this not the case? ------------------ I've got far more annoying things than that up my sleeve. -Meeks You must wear awfully loose shirts to fit an oompah band up your sleeve. -Chrisl

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Rob/1: UM how is that funny? <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Rob, the post works on multiple levels: A) It is funny. It has words that are all spelled correctly. C) It is not a collection of, roughly, three dozen posts by the same person on the same thread. D) It is still funny. E) Funny, as in ha ha. Now, I would agree that the disclaimer didn't need to be included but, other than that, the Lemurian judge gives it a 5.9. ------------------ I've got far more annoying things than that up my sleeve. -Meeks You must wear awfully loose shirts to fit an oompah band up your sleeve. -Chrisl

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by David Aitken: Horse ****, horse semen and other worthless horse byproducts... Is it not horrible to read a language you don't understand? You know something is being said, but it makes no sense to you. It really does make your head hurt. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I always assume things written or spoken in a foreign language are insults, I'm right 99% of the time. I'm also pretty sure this was standard operating procedure for most diplomats up until 1973, explaining why the world has become so boring lately. ------------------ I've got far more annoying things than that up my sleeve. -Meeks You must wear awfully loose shirts to fit an oompah band up your sleeve. -Chrisl

What the hell kind of stupid, sorry horse**** is this? I walk out for my monthly Absinthe binge and when I come back people are posting in some kind of language, Klingon I assume, about chicks and, well, not speaking the language, god knows what else. Do you losers stop there? No, you follow up your little monkey-speak with one-line ripostes the likes of which PeterNZer would be ashamed. Stupid Bastard: Gee, ha ha ha, I've killed you and I'm gonna kill ya later. Stupid Bastard #2 (Posted not 2 minutes afterward): No, I'm gonna kill you. HAHAHAHAHAH. Now you listen up you ugly bunch of Survivor 2 rejects, if you cannot post something that makes me either laugh uncontrollably, sob like a little girl or storm around the room looking for something to bash to death like a hummingbird or hairless rodent, then you have a moral responsibility to at least make your boring posts longer than three metric lines of coke. Otherwise, guys like Lewis show up and, thinking, "Dur, I could post here, to" post here. This is my home, you bastards, if you ruin this, then I will personally hunt each one of you down, cut off your significant parts, sew them together and make a new house out of them. Kay? ------------------ I've got far more annoying things than that up my sleeve. -Meeks You must wear awfully loose shirts to fit an oompah band up your sleeve. -Chrisl

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Seanachai: Ooooh, I can't stand seeing people fight. Probably because I'm a sissy.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Shut up, you! 90% of our interaction with each other is the simulated death of simulated men under our simulated command. The other 10% is calmly explaining how we will hurt and kill each other. Even though Andreas loves me and I love him, spats such as these are unavoidable. So I say, let the bile flow. Ha ha! By the way, does anyone know what happened to the board to cause these evil multiple posts? ------------------ I've got far more annoying things than that up my sleeve. -Meeks You must wear awfully loose shirts to fit an oompah band up your sleeve. -Chrisl [This message has been edited by Elijah Meeks (edited 11-02-2000).]

Post euthenasia. I love it. [This message has been edited by Elijah Meeks (edited 11-02-2000).]

Humbug I say! If you had any artillery (The cost of my line was a complete lack of artillery) you could have punched a hole in my line and rolled me up. Or you could have dropped smoke and moved in. I think that my defense was not impregnable, rather it was ingenuitive, especially anchoring it with the pillbox. As to scenarios, I have not played any of the ones that do not come with the game and am open to anything. I like to defend or attack, and frown upon any scenario that involves ducks, fellatio or In Living Color references. ------------------ I've got far more annoying things than that up my sleeve. -Meeks You must wear awfully loose shirts to fit an oompah band up your sleeve. -Chrisl

Oh, Andreas, whoa is the one who opens the can of whupass upon himself. You whine and complain about yet, if you for a moment thought about the logical fallacy you present, you would see the many flaws in your argument: Point A: My massive number of LMGs. Well, sir, if you have ever played CM, I'm sure you would discover that the LMG team is almost but not quite as durable as a Tickle-Me-Elmo doll. Point B: Custer. Not just a poor commander but a wretched excuse for a human being. Point C: The Pillbox. Ahem, are you saying that fixed defenses are no longer a monument to the stupidity of man? Point D: The 150mm IG. Yes, that was fun, wasn't it. Point E: The Whole Bloody Weak Line Defense. You were quick to say, "Well, a strong line but he doesn't have anything behind it" yet you were quicker to give up and not try to breach it. If I had been faced with a defense such as this, I would have triumphed. I did not gloat as I felt as I felt that frankly, your pathetic play left nothing but a bad taste in my mouth. Now take your nipples out of your ears and send me a scenario, you arse-end of a skink. I don't care which scenario. ------------------ I've got far more annoying things than that up my sleeve. -Meeks You must wear awfully loose shirts to fit an oompah band up your sleeve. -Chrisl

I am come forth, with mine own nipples placed into mine own ears, held there by mine own thumbs, torn off mine own hands by that which goes by the name I must speak. Yes, Nyarlthotep to some, Asmodeus to others, the Black Goat of the Woods, the Foulest, Muirtep, Slayer of Alexander, He of the Mortal Wound, The Unspeakable, The Unmaker, His Immortal Unholiness, the Lord of Pitch and the Keeper of Pain, Berli has engineered mine own topplement. A minor topplement, I can proudly say and a beautiful battle. We called forth a cease-fire and his men did hold the VL. I can be defeated. I have been defeated. I admit my master is Berli. ------------------ I've got far more annoying things than that up my sleeve. -Meeks You must wear awfully loose shirts to fit an oompah band up your sleeve. -Chrisl

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Berlichtingen: I'm not one inclined to post single sentence responses but, you are evil! ------------------ I've got far more annoying things than that up my sleeve. -Meeks You must wear awfully loose shirts to fit an oompah band up your sleeve. -Chrisl

I agree, excellent site, top notch writing. ------------------ I've got far more annoying things than that up my sleeve. -Meeks You must wear awfully loose shirts to fit an oompah band up your sleeve. -Chrisl

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Seanachai: Wiping the tears away...okay, Meeks, my little Marshall of Knights, that was the next funniest post after Mark IVs. Welcome, Kitty. Your presence is refreshing, and in this Cesspool, that's a blessing. Mark IV is back to keep Meeks in line, women are showing up to slap Meeks like a cheeky monkey, Aitkin isn't dead, Shaw is posting again, Berli is Evil, Geier is jolly and pathological, YK2 seeks to destroy me, PawBroon is unutterably mad and French, Lorak broods, Hiram is polite, Bauhaus is standing and waving his hand over his head to be called on, Peng communes with Powers beyond mankind, Professor Doktor Hamster X is lolling on the beaches in Tahiti, Andreas/Chubacabra/and Ilk are drunk in London, God is in His Heaven, and we crouch here below in muck. Who's for a bit of a sing-song, then? <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Oh no, we'll have no sing while I'm around here. It is an odd equilibrium that has been reached within the Pool, though I must say, since not a soul patted me on the back, my John Wayne-Patton post was the funniest thing known to man since Confucious invented knock knock jokes. I am sad to report OGSF is in the process of beating me like a redheaded stepchild and looks to be moving into the beating me like a white dog area. I'm having a good fight with Jitbag (Elvis told me to call him that, I don't know why but it does have a good ring to it) and Croda is once again learning why I have total control over his pathetic life. Oh, and unless one of them is a man, we've got more women in the Pool than the entire rest of the forum put together, life is good. ------------------ I've got far more annoying things than that up my sleeve. -Meeks You must wear awfully loose shirts to fit an oompah band up your sleeve. -Chrisl

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Kitty: Fine. Just as long as I don't have to sleep in it. I tried to keep quiet but I couldn't resist. =) Kitty <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> No, sorry, we've filled our quota, we'll have no more women here, thank you. Yes, yes, move along. Out, now! Gah, women, you vote them into office and then they want to be everywhere. I say we stone her! ------------------ I've got far more annoying things than that up my sleeve. -Meeks You must wear awfully loose shirts to fit an oompah band up your sleeve. -Chrisl

You know MarkIV, it makes me feel warm and fuzzy when a moron like securityguard shows up, bringing us together. I may know that your ACW knowledge equals that of a Tibetan monk but at least we can both agree that this subliterate twit can take a flying leap and a rolling donut. ------------------ I've got far more annoying things than that up my sleeve. -Meeks You must wear awfully loose shirts to fit an oompah band up your sleeve. -Chrisl

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Mark IV: Gorilla, at the Washington Monument: Tall pointy thing! At the ocean: Big wet spot! At indoor plumbing: Gawl-leee! At Meeks: Illiterate boor! <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> You are the second most humorous person to post on this board. I am currently laughing so hard as to not think straight. Hey, Custer's a great calvary commander! Hey, look at that, supply side economics works! Wahoo! This is better than psychadelics! Weeee, wait, ok, stopped laughing. Seriously, whoa, that was a funny post. Hey, wait a minute, that last part was about me! ------------------ I've got far more annoying things than that up my sleeve. -Meeks You must wear awfully loose shirts to fit an oompah band up your sleeve. -Chrisl