stevetherat

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Moriarty: Moriarty, 98; Mark IV, 2. Win for me. Moriarty, 90; Berli 10. Win for me. Moriarty, 96; Seniletea, 4. Win for me. Moriarty, 80; Peng, 20. Win for me. Moriarty, 82; Geier, 18. Win for me. Moriarty, 76; Mensch, 24. Win for me. Moriarty, 99; Blousemouse, 1. Win for me. Moriarty, 98; Goanna, 2. Win for me. Moriarty, 80; Lorak, 20. Win for me. Moriarty, 98; Chupacabra, 2. Win for me. Moriarty, 78; Germanboy, 22. Win for me. Moriarty, 94; Mace, 6. Win for me. Moriarty, 99; jd, 1. Win for me. Moriarty, 99; Lawyer, 1. Win for me. Moriarty, 99; Joe Pshaw, 1. Win for me. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Obviously couldn't, wouldn't and didn't beat me. Pansy.

So, this wheel of deprecation and disease perpetually turns ad infinitum. I would like to point out that although I dip in and out on an irregular basis (if only to point and snigger), I have become overwhelmed by matters outside of this contrite e-world and I find it increasingly difficult to figuratively poke and prod you vegetables into some sort of response. That said, I offer some sort of update on situations currently at hand. Please be seated. Chuppy, if he indeed still loiters in these parts, is conducting a static version of the great Trafalgar. I have him well in range and I'm currently conducting a terrific broadside volley into the very lungs of his defence. I expect a complete collapse of his entire body of troops, somewhat like a 17 year old having his first pint of best and emerging into fresh air. Iskandy continues to swarm his plagues of infantry into my well-prepared defences, only to be torn to ribbons by my entrenched defenders of chastity and hygene. Aquine Perplexity and I have hardly started this monster of open canvas but, knowing that flukey best boy of the Devil himself, he will probably come out smelling of roses wearing my guts as a panty hose. Wildwhelp has sent to me the most dire of situations to begin a battle. Naturally, it can only have come from that Bastard of angels BoilingTurd. I'm still trying to work this one out, mainly to avoid being fertilizer on turn one. PetalNZ is an infuriating squib of a bloke. No matter what I do to break through to the flags, he pre-empts my every move and blocks me off with an army of vehicles and men. Obviously, he cheats like no one else and has cracked my password. Bastard. Margot is more sparrodic than the most severest of epileptic cases known to medical science. One week I get a flurry of turns, the next it's as still as a summer afternoon by the river. We seem to be in a stalemate situation right now but, due to my cunning and speed, I occupy all the flags. Wonderful. It's been a while since I looked at my files and, at this moment of recollection, that is my complete repetoire. You may, if you wish, place an official complaint that you have been omitted and I will rectify the situation immediately. Now please, carry on about your business. StR

Oi, bitches. Yes, you Wopmen and Buggermeten. I'm still waiting for the file! Have you yella'd out Wimpy? Get that freakin file over to my box you maggot!

Thanks for all the cards and good wishes. It touched me, really. Wimpfag, I am laughing at you on the inside. I maintain a steady composure on the outside so as not to drive you going to your local mall with your service revolver. Are you allowed one of those yet? Get your bitch to make a game and send it right over. I'm still recovering from a boozy birthday bash, but even with a pounding hangover you are a mere gnat in my Guinness. Extra protein, nothing more.

I knew you'd never forgive me if I hadn't told, so here goes... It's my birthday! I shall expect cards and presents imminently. Wildmutt you pondering pillock, you're still bitter about that crushing and utterly humiliating defeat, arn't you? If I were you I'd end it all. How shameful for you to even post here! Poor chap, I pity you.

So the chaff is slowly being sifted from the wheat?

Hey Alpine Persistance, I'm no oversight! Oversight indeed! I'm trapped at home due to my freelance stylee work habits (ie I have to PAY for access) and what greets me when I spend a serious amount of hard-earned greenbacks pressing that 'Connect' button? Disrespect and derision. Well, cloak you in a wooly coat and burn on a pyre. And where the hell are all these extra rats coming from? Someone get the poison.

So, I've been back for a couple of days and I bet you're wondering why I haven't posted. Well, I'll tell ya. Firing up the ol' purple iMac (no, that was not an analogy) I was confronted by aproximately 415 threads bearing the name of that pin-headed clergy raper. I stood, or rather sat, in front of my Mac starstruck like a myxomaed rabbit facing the mainbeams of a Kenworth 18 wheeler. By an electronic variation of the Darwinian selection theorem, this thread has emerged as the sole infestation on Page One of this 'land'. I thus submit my first post since returning from the harsh no-mans-land (as all the blokes are faggotts) of Scotland. Yes, before you ask, I did have a good time. No, I am not glad to be back. Maybe I will continue this facile distraction while I try to find something more interesting to do, like paint my toenails or count the twists in my intestinal tract using nothing more than a magnifying glass and a pen torch. And while I'm here, what the f has happened to the entrance qualifications? There seems to be a profusion of achnied truants trying (and failing, again) to fit into another socially unacceptable geek clique. Who is in charge here? Shut that f'ing gate before we become infected by some contagion we can only eradicate by a cull. And I speak from experience!

At bloody last! I've been going to my bookmarked forum page (without the ****e brickwork) for days and receiving the 'forum is offline for repairs' bollocks all that time. I decide to go back through the traditional route to get here: the homepage; discussion forums; et bloody cetera, and I find we've got a new pad. Well, someone's hung new wallpaper, at least. So, where was I? Nowhere, actually, because I've been in such a rage over the 'offline' business that my words have evapourated. No, there is one thing, but it's hardly a surprise. The game with Croda has ended on turn 60. The score? Yes, I was coming to that. Hold on to your hats; 92:8 to me. It's only fitting for one so blatently talented. There are thousands of other battles going on, and I'm sure you'l forgive me for forgetting you for a while, but I'm off to Scotland. Loch Lomond for Easter. Perfect. Well, it would be if I can stay away from that Scottish hoard of *ankers OHMYGOD and Dave 'the rave' Aitken. That's it. Please go forth and multiply. StR

Punch and cookies? It's tea and scones you arse rag!

BTS, how would you rank the take-up of CMBO compared to your business plan (if, indeed, you had one!). I ask because you seemed to run out of CD pressings and manuals fairly early and took a while to replace them, which may suggest you did not expect this level sales (among other things, of course). In your view, has it been a success or as projected? StR

Didn't I tell you I had a cunning plan, impatient one? Patience is a vitue...

Oh, forgot, the video card on an iMac is not upgradeable.

No, no, no. You are all trying to solve a problem that does not (necessarily) exist. Simply put all of that stuff you have on your desktop into one or more folders (it's neater that way, anyway) and keep your resolution at 800x600. You do, however have a slight (enforced) problem with higher resolutions. It sounds like one of your BMPs may be corrupt. Install a fresh copy (from the CD) of your BMPs, then replace, one by one, your third-party mods, each time restarting CMBO to see if it stalls. This will enable you to find which mod is corrupt and you can download a new one. That is, if you really HAVE to run at a higher resolution.

Feck the hell off, you abandoned furless mongrel. Read the fecking first post.

Hello, A muzzle brake allows the gas to escape not at the barrel end (causing recoil) but at the sides (of the brake) causing less recoil. Picture the scene: The shell is fired and the gasses expand rapidly, pushing the shell up the barrel. In a normal barrel, all of the gasses exit through the end of the barrel immediately behind the shell causing massive recoil. In a braked barrel, and this is the big difference, when the shell is very close to exiting the barrel the gasses, instead of being held back by the shell, exit through the holes in the muzzel brake which cause less (upto 30%) recoil. The shell has alread accellerated up the barrel and the few centimetres less the gasses expand due to exiting through the brake is no real loss. Does this clear thngs up? The brake is not designed to reduce barrel length or anything similar, it is for reducing recoil pressures only. StR

Oh marvelous AP! Marvelous. Trawling the archives I came across this: http://www.battlefront.com/discuss/Forum1/HTML/017804.html Excellent work. I support the mulitple gunmen theory.

Sod, you goof, SOD. What the hell is a sot?

It's great fun to watch platoon after platoon come running into your prepared defenses. They come, they go, each time less goers that comers. Great! Ikisshands you really must try something a little bit less direct. Or not, of course! Hell, it's all the same to me. I'm getting to know how to position more effective ambush points with the most efficient Distance:Kill ratios. I'd watch out with those three tanks parked side by side on the hill too. You may be under the (delirious) illusion that I don't have that hill well covered by even more guns! OK, yes, fair dinkum, you polished off some guns on my flank with the railway guns you have behind you, but the position has served it's purpose. I'd be surprised if you had any troops on that side with legs still intact. StR

I am quiet, dear Petal, because I am still reeling from the shock your gameyness reaches. I had bearly begun to move in any appreciable way when almost my whole armoured force was reduced to providing the freakin' wildlife with new metal-clad dwellings. Some with built-in central heating. It is IMPOSSIBLE for this to happen to one so skilled as yours truly. I have practically nothing left to attack you with and I'm considering alternatives. Bastard. StR

Ah! Margo, I can sense that your pride has been cut to the bone. Not only did I take the shine off that forrest boy curling at your feet by beating him 80:20 (rough score, put me right Willy), I'm also driving you back over the Rhine. No matter how much you try, puffing out your puny, single-haired chest in false pretenses doesn't dull the pain. Take Asprin and sleep, my boy, the more the better. StR

What's with all this anti-Brit gonads Petal? IM ever so 'umble O, the Brits did more R&D per capita than any other nation in that war. We constantly developed antidotes to problems the Gerrys were lumping on our shoulders during the entire course of the war. Our main (and HUGE) bugbear was the lack of resources. I'm not only talking of material resources, but adequate (an trained) human resources too. While there is no way we alone could have fought this war, even with the aid of the Commonwealth, we could and did defend ourselves with a smidgen of honour. OK, so the Germs didn't put in a good enough effort (in the BoB), but I'm sure we would have held out. The price for our lack was the involvement and handing over to the American War Machine, and the subsequent bloated egos from their proclamations thet 'they' won the war. No, don't get me wrong, I'm not anti-American in general, just the flag-waving ignorant ones that think the World begins and ends on their shoreline. The good thing about people who play this game (most of them) is that they realise the world is a bigger place than 50 states, and the Allies constituted more than those with the Stars and Stripes on their shoulder patches. This opinion of us Brits, whatever it is, is formulated on the decisions and writings of a few. Yes, we had arrogant anus dwellers too and, unfortunately, they had very loud voices. StR Just realised I made no point at all in this post. What I wanted to say was that we had a 'make do' policy worse that any other. There were 4 main types of gun and all but the 17pdr was obsolete by the time it was introduced in a tank. The reliability of all tanks we produced was diabolical, but in parts we made some excellent discoveries, in particular, suspension, DS ammunition, speed/weight combinations. [This message has been edited by stevetherat (edited 04-03-2001).]

Aha Ales, does that mean you develop manners and courtesy with the amount of posts you submit. Interesting correlation. I need the ratio on this, one of you Grogs could work out the formula: Posts:Politeness

Don't give up on me yet Petal. He snuck behind me and charred one of my charees, but I'm making full steam ahead for the flag. With those precious blokes left way behind, he has signed his own death warrant. Hail, the Hamster collective is dead! (or very nearly dead, anyway) StR Oh, before I go, Lorak put your chisel in the sharpener, a momentus happeneing has happened; the original newbie battle vs Wildman has ended. His corner has thrown in the blooded towel. An ambulance has been called and another career ends in the emergency ward. Despite having about 6 Tiger 2s, four low hung bastard guns on wheels, and a whole hoard of PzrTruppen, he couldn't defeat my gallant (you've no idead how it pains me say that) Americans. Are you listening Marlon?

No 'please' or 'thank you's? Sounds a bit rude to me. Get some manners.