Seanachai

Dear God, no! He's from East St. Louis?! [ November 07, 2003, 05:15 PM: Message edited by: Seanachai ]

As you've never figured out how to open the ones with pull tabs, this must amount to the happiest moment of your life. No need to keep the kiddies standing by the cooler, popping the tops for pop anymore, eh? A grand step forward into independence, eh, Macey? snicker Macey got caught snogging the wrong set of boots! [ November 07, 2003, 05:01 PM: Message edited by: Seanachai ]

He never gets any cleverer with choosing screen names, does he? Figured it was him after reading two posts.

But enough of all this. We must turn our attentions to things of importance. Cue theme song: Have Laptop, Will Travel Reads the card of a man, A lone mortgage banker In a savage land. His teaching's for hire, And he travels far. A lone mortgage banker Is the man called Justicar. Justicar, Justicar, Where do you roam? Justicar, Justicar, Far, far from home. Joe, there are a number of things that need our immediate attention. First, without going into who supported him, or the legality of it all, or any number of other equally interesting issues, it's clear that we're going to have to depose Meeks. Can't proclaim a new Queen without disposing of the old King, unless the latter is taking the former as his, and that doesn't even bear thinking about. I'm thinking that a peasant revolt, with the aristocracy piling on when they see which way the wind is blowing, is classic, with the only question being whether he is simply driven from his throne and into exile, or whether the mob pulls him down, with equally classic beheading, dismembering, and pieces of the body paraded around the kingdom for all to see, with crowds cheering lustily over each drippy bit. Or should we go for a more solemn, spiritual and even more venerable tradition, pursuing the course of the ancient Celts, and state that King Meeks has failed to make the kingdom prosper, and sacrifice him on the altars of the Church of Seanachai to propitiate the gods (well, me, in any case), and then raise up the new Queen who shall lead us all into a glorious new future? Or should we just send him a 'Dear King John' letter? Lacks flair, but there is a certain cad-ish element to it. After having dispensed with out King, we will then need to actually crown our Queen. She has, of course, been proclaimed by the Olde Ones, acknowledged by the Justicar, and huzzahed by the hoipolloi. Such public acclaim for any being has not previously been seen, echoing throughout the corridors of Schloss Peng, and reaching even into the Wasteland where three ancient, eldritch figures sit hunched around a fire, swapping a bottle. But there has been no formal investiture, no coronation, no solemn ceremony fraught with reverence and stately dignity. No shindig. We will need to address that forthwith. Fair Queen Emma, please take a moment to consider what you'd like to do for your first acts as Queen. Amnesties and setting free the unjustly imprisoned is usually a crowd pleaser, although it's slightly edged out by mass executions of enemies of the state for sheer volume of cheering and clapping. No reason you can't have both, for that matter. Consider putting together some lists. Joe you're a busy man, I appreciate that, but we simply have to give some thought to these matters. First things first, then: How shall we rid ourselves of the King? I suppose we could always go for laughs, and have a high Church official shout out within the hearing of several clergymen 'oh who will rid me of this troublesome king', and then sit back and admire the satire as they ride to the capital and kill him in the middle of his palace... [ November 07, 2003, 02:42 PM: Message edited by: Seanachai ]

No, that's Grog Dorosh, lad. Old Pestilence, we call him. Poxy, to his friends. Except he doesn't have any. Well, there's the mannequin. Not sure how that relationship would be defined. I'm sure they're close,though.

It's Babra, Sarge!

But Seanachai, there is so much material, so little time. Whatever is a poor Texas lawyer to do? Steve </font>

Ahem. Gentlemen, have we all forgotten the lessons of many months ago, when people were busy being humourously abusive about family members, but the one lad's mother happened to be dying of cancer? And that the jokes weren't going over so well? As I've said before, it's enough of a burden for your poor, long-suffering families to have produced you in the first place, without being dragged in here to be further mocked. Let's focus on the deficiencies of the people who actually post here. That should be enough to keep any of you busy enough without splashing the Cess onto those who are innocent, and, in the cases of your families, already victims enough.

you had nothing to do with it, old man. </font>

Now, now! We don't do mothers here. Perhaps that could have been better phrased, but that's not important right now. Boo, you must get these things right. Lars would be unbeatable in a scenario involving assault boats. Or rather, the only thing that would overcome him would be the boats themselves... By the way, Boo, I just declared you a wholly owned subsidiary of the Church of Seanachai in another thread. You must be very excited. Finally, after a life of aimlessness and mental deterioration, you've been given a sense of direction and guidance. No, don't thank me. A show of gratitude characterized by unseemly grovelling, while satisfying, was not what motivated me. No, Boo, it was the simple satisfaction I get from leading you up out of the mud and darkness of your existence into the light of my presence. To see your broad, heavily brow-ridged and rather blank face turned upward, squinting, with a look of awe on it; that, Boo, is enough for me. My Self, but I'm just filled with the joys of my creation today! [ November 07, 2003, 11:50 AM: Message edited by: Seanachai ]

I blamed Dorosh, Emrys, Berli and Andreas. Figured the whole outage as the beginning of the Ride Out to Apocalypse. Bloody disappointing to find the world wasn't in fact ending. Although it's nice to be able to post to the Peng Challenge Thread again. I was so bored, I almost processed Boo Radley's turn (Boo Radley, well known Ohio crazed-wit; not to be mistaken for any other Forum Boo. "Boo Radley: he's solid plastic, so don't get taken in by cheap imitations!" <small font>Boo Radley is a wholly owned subsidiary of the Church of Seanachai. Use of his likeness, posts, or lackwitted rambling is forbidden without the express permission of the Church of Seanachai</small font>

This all seems rather pointlessly complicated and bizarre. Couldn't the time waiting for the release of CMAK be more gainfully employed by assassinating whatever little store of character A.E.B. might still retain? All this 'send kill order, send defend order' stuff. What the heck is that? I was hoping for some good, old fashioned character assassination. Of course, with you lot 'character assassination' is really rather more a form of euthanasia.

He wore blue velvet Bluer than velvet was the night Softer than satin was the light From the stars But in my heart there'll always be Precious and warm, a memory Through the years And I still can see blue velvet Damp with Soddball's tears I await your CMAK setup,then, Soddball.

His fear, that I believe is shared by all of us, is that as a Texas lawyer you were unaware that there is a difference. [ November 06, 2003, 11:41 AM: Message edited by: Seanachai ]

Hey, Boo Radley, apparently the newest member of the Board is 'Boo', an exterminator from Pennsylvania. I suggest you get out there and kick his arse and bring a piece of him in here to show us. Now we'll have to use your 'full' title just to avoid confusing you with some roach killer from Pennsyltucky. Like it's not difficult enough already. Mistress Kitty, I was amused by the Oz & Pom pony show. Berli sent me that direction. I shall check it out forthwith. [ November 05, 2003, 08:50 PM: Message edited by: Seanachai ]

Good God, I don't think I've ever seen Kitty have to ask for attention before, and, having asked, have to wait. Someone's going to catch it for this. Sorry, Kitty, no one about but me right now, apparently. Doubtless real human beings will be along shortly.

Are you going to cry, Soddball? We like it when you cry...

Sheesh, took me ages to give my bodyguards the slip.. I know they mean well and are only carrying out their duties, but it can be quite annoying at times..... *Removes her long black hooded cloak to reveal Levis and a T-shirt* Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh such a nice feeling to be able to take that corset off for a while.. knowing I can come here to unwind from my Royal Duties (whatever they might be) is indeed a much welcomed break from protocol.. <big> * SIGH * </BIG> *Curls up on a big soft torn and tatty chair* Ohhhhhhhhh lovely.. now where did I put this months Cosmo? P.S. Dave No need to worry, I escaped through the side entrance of the Peng Thread and no one followed me so............. *Turns quickly* Bummer I have to go.. I'm sure that was Boo I saw peeking through the window... *Drops copy of Cosmo and grabs Cloak* Ah well.... It was nice while it lasted... <big> SIGH </big> </font>

Quite the little fantasy world your mind is trapped in, isn't it. In fact, you have lost to every single Australian you've played </font>

Rise, thou, our Queen to be, and prepare thyself. We must discuss your coronation, oh much admired one. The coronation of the Pretender, Meeks...went off poorly. We would do better in this new, glorious incarnation of the Mother Beautiful Thread... Would you rather all your enemies lined the concourse impaled, beheaded, or both?

Lookin' to get crushed by yet another Australian? </font>

OZI DIGGER, YOU HORRIBLE LITTLE MAN! YOU'RE ON THE LIST! NOT JUST THE LIST, BUT THE LIST! Are you speaking to me you bugger?! Are you saying that you cry yourself to sleep at night, because there's no one there to hug you tight, and set your mind right, and forgive you for being almost half-wittedly Australian? Is that what you're saying, you stream of dingo yellow? Because that's what I'm hearing, lad! Are you lonely, then? Are you all after a good cuddle from your Mum, and soft words of assurance from the UberGnome? Do you want me to hold your sodding hand, while you wipe the sticky lolly from your face, and explain to all the people here that you are, in fact, a 'big boy now', and willing to take on a man's challenge? Send me a setup, you awful little Aussie streak o' piss. Conditions are yours to set, but nothing more than 1500 base points, you bastard! I will not brook this sort of Aussie impertinence! I am not here for your amusement, you worthless little pillock! You are here for mine!

The Great god Seanachai, before whom all mortals quail, before whom all quail are mortal and served nicely roasted, and before whom none may speak without resorting to wit, sees your comment and finds it...wanting. You are found to be Australian in our eyes. Cease your attempts at humour, of which you are no master. It is because of you, oh, Mace, that all Australians are as nothing to us, and shall require a right good crushing.

I've got a bloody objection! He may be a zero, but, by Gawd he's a Marine zero! I'll be damned (ok, not much of a statement was it) if I'll see him reporting to a %$in' squid! </font>

[lumbers forward to the Paddock fence] I know, I know, its me charisma and stud qualities but one shouldn't be two forward and I'm only one rather than two. I always say military-types should have a good MOUNT... with ostrich feathers and polished riding boots and breeches a size too short. *sniff* ... makes 'em walk funny. Oh, well... if yer insist. Please retire to behind the shed and prepare for fitment. We must compare pumps. *squimp* Yeknod </font>