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Kings of Kower Unit Patch


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Other pixel commanders may boast about their brave, gallant, heroic, blah-blah-blah units; but not this CO---nuh-uh, no sir, no way. My boys hit the dirt and try their damndest to get under it when the lead (and depleted uranium and copper cores and whatnot) starts to fly. All the lads in my units have been in what we call "fetal battle positions" longer than most fetuses.

Part of the secret to my troops' readiness to make like roto-tillers is our constant "Kower Klass" drilling. It's exhausting and dangerous to practice diving for cover on, say, concrete, but when fighting from a rooftop, who survives--the idiot who stands up and tries to fire his weapon, or the crafty cowerer who curls up in a ball, saving his ammo and his strength for the key battles that take place back at the base in the chow line or dodging paper cuts while filling out transfer forms??

True, situational awareness suffers somewhat when one makes like an armadillo facing a coyote, but I think my boys have earned the right for this special unit patch: "Kings of Kower."

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Our motto comes from an old Bill Mauldin cartoon:

"I can't get no lower--my buttons are in the way."

;)

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Infact when looking at it... Those guys could make much SMALLER targets if they would be on their belly pressing their heads and limbs totally against soil.

I can see that it was not my lack of tactical eye and lack of intelligense and lack of terrain reading that made (and will make) them to die like flies... they just don't know how to offer smallest possible targets to enemy. I'm relieved.

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