Michael Emrys Posted August 21, 2009 Share Posted August 21, 2009 You think you have problems? A year or so ago I had an infestation of fungus gnats. I didn't even know there was such a thing. Really annoying pests. The only way I got rid of them was to throw out the soil some of my house plants were growing in and repot them. Michael 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MeatEtr Posted August 21, 2009 Share Posted August 21, 2009 I got you all beat by a long shot. I wasn't sure if I was gonna post this or not, it's somewhat embarrassing. But then again, what do I care. Anyways, growing up as a child in Farmington Hills, MI I looked forward to summertime, mostly due to Michigans sometimes harsh winter. But besides that, the ants came back and infested our driveway. So I therfore took it upon myself to wage bloody war, year after year, against them. My tactics and weapons were brutal and fearless, I would stick firecrackers in the entrance holes in the little ant hills to blow them up. I sometimes used my flamethrower, err butane lighter, to scorch them as they came out of their little fortress. But my favorite weapon of choice was my all mighty deathslayer hammer. It was one of those little hammers used for small things like hanging picture frames. It was a tough job smashing my enemy one by one, but somebody had to do it. Oh but it gets better, as we all know children live in their own worlds right. So when neighbors or company would come over they would always ask right off, "What in the hell is that kid doing?". Since of course I never stopped or wavered when such distractions came around. My dad always told them I was trying to fix the driveway or something. Yes, I can still remember their "WTF" looks on their faces, lol. Anyways, my dad always said the whole neighborhood thought I was nuts back then. Who could blame them. So there you have it, confession complete. Am I a badass or what! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Emrys Posted August 21, 2009 Share Posted August 21, 2009 I can go you one better. I grew up in fire ant country and one spring they moved into my neighborhood. The usual techniques (explosives, etc.) weren't working, so we (my buddies and myself) upped the ante. We found a barrel somewhere and filled it with water into which we poured an entire cannister of chlordane and a few other things, like urine as I recall, and poured the whole mess down the entrance holes of the nest. I mean we saturated it and the adjacent area out to a radius of at least a yard. The fire ants disappeared and never returned. Maybe our reputation as bad guys not to be messed with spread throughout the fire ant community. Nowadays such tactics would be rightly regarded as dangerously toxic to the environment, but back then we weren't even thinking in such terms. Michael 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MeatEtr Posted August 22, 2009 Share Posted August 22, 2009 I can go you one better. I grew up in fire ant country and one spring they moved into my neighborhood. The usual techniques (explosives, etc.) weren't working, so we (my buddies and myself) upped the ante. We found a barrel somewhere and filled it with water into which we poured an entire cannister of chlordane and a few other things, like urine as I recall, and poured the whole mess down the entrance holes of the nest. I mean we saturated it and the adjacent area out to a radius of at least a yard. The fire ants disappeared and never returned. Maybe our reputation as bad guys not to be messed with spread throughout the fire ant community. Nowadays such tactics would be rightly regarded as dangerously toxic to the environment, but back then we weren't even thinking in such terms. Michael Haha, very nice, chemical warfare, good job. I didn't have anything like that. I did want to use some gasoline one time but my dad drew the line and said no way. This was like early to mid-80s I was like 6-8 yrs old. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gunnergoz Posted August 22, 2009 Share Posted August 22, 2009 Haha, very nice, chemical warfare, good job. I didn't have anything like that. I did want to use some gasoline one time but my dad drew the line and said no way. This was like early to mid-80s I was like 6-8 yrs old. When did we start letting young whippersnappers get in here? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
General Jack Ripper Posted August 22, 2009 Author Share Posted August 22, 2009 @ MeatEtr That is some excellent work, I had the same situation with the ants in my driveway. Also on our front lawn, we would get ant infestations, so at the request of my parents I fought a war against them all summer long. My preferred method was to pour water down the antholes, and when the ants would come running out, I would use whatever insecticide was handy to annihilate them. Also, I used the gasoline for the lawnmower without my parent's knowledge. Apparently gasoline kill ants quite easily. @ Michael Emrys Nice work! Higly unusual strategy. One thing I heard about Fire Ants, is if you shovel up one nest, and dump it onto another nest, the two groups will fight each other to the death. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Emrys Posted August 22, 2009 Share Posted August 22, 2009 Also, I used the gasoline for the lawnmower without my parent's knowledge. Apparently gasoline kill ants quite easily. Lighter fluid will also work as will cleaning fluid. I expect kerosene and turpentine will as well as any liquid hydrocarbon. When I was in my early teens, from time to time we'd get what I called stinkbugs in our house. Actually, they were probably some species of earwig, which they closely resembled. If you squashed them or even disturbed them, they gave off a very unpleasant odor, a mixture of paper mill, boiled cabbage, and farts. At the time, I was usually engaged in making plastic models of airplanes, ships, and cars which I would paint. I came to use lighter fluid as paint thinner to clean my brushes with as it was cheaper than the stuff sold in the hobby stores and did the job just as well. So I always had a can near at hand, and when a stinkbug would appear, I would simply put a drop or two on it and it would promptly die without exuding any of its noxious perfume. @ Michael Emrys Nice work! Higly unusual strategy. One thing I heard about Fire Ants, is if you shovel up one nest, and dump it onto another nest, the two groups will fight each other to the death. I've heard something of that. Never tried it. In any event, there wasn't a neighboring nest we could have involved in the project. Might have been fun to watch, except that being in the immediate vicinity of aroused fire ants might not have been too healthy. Michael 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gunnergoz Posted August 22, 2009 Share Posted August 22, 2009 Michael Emrys (snip) Nice work! Higly unusual strategy. One thing I heard about Fire Ants, is if you shovel up one nest, and dump it onto another nest, the two groups will fight each other to the death. Yes but if one group survived the battle, I'm not sure it would be very clever to let Darwin select the most lethal fire ant in your neighborhood, though... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Other Means Posted August 23, 2009 Share Posted August 23, 2009 I worked on a tall ship once. It was infested with cockroaches that would swarm under the decks and lived mainly in the moist, welcoming darkness of the engine compartment. When they were becoming too uppity - taking toddlers, small dogs and such - we'd open up the hatches and blast them with nerve gas. Or at least, reading the warnings on the can that's what it seemed to be. Seriously. One night I was asleep in my bunk but woke up with what seemed a cold, hard button in my mouth... Yeah. Spat it out, vaporised it with a heel squish and scrubbed and scrubbed my teeth. I stopped myself when I actually had the can of nerve gas in my hand wondering if it would work as toothpaste. *shudders* I'm with ya SLIM. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Emrys Posted August 23, 2009 Share Posted August 23, 2009 One night I was asleep in my bunk but woke up with what seemed a cold, hard button in my mouth... I can sympathize. I grew up in the South where we had giant flying cockroaches. One night when I was five, one of those monsters flew down from the curtains adjacent to my bed and landed on the side of my neck. I screamed so loudly that my parents thought I had fallen out of bed. Imagine, aggressive vampire cockroaches. *shudder* Michael 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tools4fools Posted September 1, 2009 Share Posted September 1, 2009 One night I was asleep in my bunk but woke up with what seemed a cold, hard button in my mouth... Yeah. Spat it out, vaporised it with a heel squish and scrubbed and scrubbed my teeth. I stopped myself when I actually had the can of nerve gas in my hand wondering if it would work as toothpaste. Duhhh... Reminds me pouring luke warm coffee in a cup in the kitchen in Manila - in darkness, didn't turn on the lights. The cockroach obviously didn't mind that coffee as when taking a good gulp I had this scrabbling thing in my mouth... Took me a long time to clean that kitchen when coffee, mug, coffee can (which I still was holding in the other hand) and cockroach went all over the place... Bastard escaped on top of it... **** 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Emrys Posted September 1, 2009 Share Posted September 1, 2009 Ugh. Reminds me of yet another story. Quite a few years ago I was heating up a can of soup for my dinner and decided that some grated cheese tossed in would make it even tastier. So I grated some cheese and stirred it in. After the soup had finished heating I proceeded to eat it. Somewhere about the second or third spoonful, I noticed something with an unexpected texture in my mouth. I pulled it out and examined it and it turned out to be a granddaddy longlegs. I searched the remaining soup for any remaining bits of bug body and discarded them. Then I finished the soup. I was hungry and there wasn't much food in the house that night. Later on, I decided that gramps had taken up residence inside the grater where I couldn't see him (or her as the case may be) and got added to the cheese pile. Not as bad as getting a mouthful of cockroach, but still not my idea of a fun addition to my dinner. Michael 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Other Means Posted September 1, 2009 Share Posted September 1, 2009 We should definitely make a club - "The Unkissables". 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gunnergoz Posted September 2, 2009 Share Posted September 2, 2009 Stinky cheese cake, anyone? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Emrys Posted September 2, 2009 Share Posted September 2, 2009 Somebody would probably find a dead rat in it. Michael 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.