Seanachai

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Panzer Leader: Thanx! Hey, on the subject of humour, I nominate Mark IV as the funniest guy around. ...moved to the General Ignorum.. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Sometimes, i can't believe what I see in these (constantly renewed) Hallowed Halls. Mark IV as the funniest guy around? Excuse me? Mark IV is simply beyond 'funniest guy'. shudder Mark IV, much as I despise, hate and repudiate the toad, is Witty. And Educated. Mind, if I coud have the life crushed out of him by assassins, I would. But bar that, I hope to have him up to my family's cabin in Canada to go fishing. The opportunities for destroying your enemies at a remote cabin in the Canadian wilderness, on an island miles away from any authority are endless. Mind, you can also crack tubes on a number of Blues with them, rack up an impressive stringer of Walleyes, and have a truly impressive sing-song with them first, but in the end, you find yourself needing to destroy them. Unless, of course, they can hit all the right notes on 'I've Been a Wild Rover' while singing with Berli. In which case, their survival is not only guaranteed, it's required. Gives the rest of you swine something to aim for. Gods, how I hate Mark IV. [ 09-01-2001: Message edited by: Seanachai ]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by CMplayer: Well that's some pretty astute sleuthing, but I have an alibi. I can prove I'm Swedish. Go into CNN's weather on-line and look at the latest satellite map of Northern Europe. Got it? Okay. See the four puffy clouds near Stockholm? Well, they're right over my head. I can see them from the balcony. Satisfied?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> You dreadful little pillock. I never indicated you weren't living in Sweden, which I never questioned. I said you weren't Swedish. And you're not. Do the entire community a favour, you git, and admit where you were born and raised.

Originally posted by Pawbroon: Gentleworms! The Pool is now over the dreaded 300 posts limit. What say you we claim that one as our True Home? There is a melancholy in me, and the prospect of having people starting to fret over the idea that Threads questioning MrPeng might become Cesspools has an appealing quality... Ah! I have it, me! He is wanting to begin the new Peng Challenge Thread in that place of posting by the confused and sorry Newbie who is asking after answers regardez the Concept of Peng. Where's my turn, you descendant of D'Artagnan? You heir to Cyrano? Do not force me to Bauhaus the center of your Mothers. I know you, and your tre chic babe fantastique, Armand Jean du Plessis! You shall not triumph, while I am able to wield...well, type, anyways, in a manner responsive to your perfidious French ways! Marcel, lad, The French! How goes it? Where's my bloody turn, you most magnificent of Frogs? Why is dragging a defeat out of you like pulling my own goddamn teeth? By the by, have you found a good place to display my incisors after our last PBEM? You know I'll be angry if my eye-teeth are just sitting in some jar somewhere, you French.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by CMplayer: He's not a munchkin, he's not a tyre, he's an anti-tank grenade??? WTH is that supposed to mean?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Despite this Beings claim to residing in 'Sweden', I have long suspected him. I have met Swedes, lad, and you are no Swede. I think that the concept of 'residency' should be tempered by 'nation of origin/upbringing' CMPlayer's use of English is disturbingly American. The man is not Swedish, unless at one remove. Also, he's becoming a loose cannon. Someone take the silly bastard in hand and set him on the path. Anyone other than an American of questionable intelligence would have translated that phrase (other than correctly, as I did) as: He's not a crazed Canadian living in Germany and having jolly sing-songs with the neighbou'rs dachshund, he's not sitting in the seats reserved for his betters, he's an Armoured Exploding sort of guy. CMPlayer is neither Swedish enough to arrive at a correct translation, nor clever enough to properly play on an incorrect translation. Ergo, the bastard's an American.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Germanboy: Yeah - you lot have something to answer for. Ethan has started to make amends by being generous about buying drinks. If he posts more Grog Porn™, you may just be forgiven. Does not Fargo play in Minnesota? Would explain why Minnesotans were not involved, they would not be able to find the way out of their state, judging by their average denseness in that no doubt documentary movie, let alone mass-murder POWs. Especially if there are no woodchippers around. I liked the former Panzergrenny bawling at you - we have a saying in the Bundeswehr: 'Er ist kein Mensch, er ist kein Tier, er ist ein Panzergrenadier'. Run it through Babelfish, or learn German.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Sod that, I know enough German not to have to revert to Babelfish. He's no man, he's no animal, he's a Panzergrenadier. Also, I suggest as a translation for your Grandmother's saying, which I was thinking on tonight: "What you shout into the forest, echoes back at you". Elvis, make note of the above wise old German saying.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Seanachai: We are done here, lads. Move on over to our new home. Await further orders. And stop picking at it, or it won't ever heal.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Bugger, our new home is: Hey, Mr. Tambourine Man, play the Peng Challenge for Me. Stop snickering. You, yes you, lad, I was talking to you!

We are done here, lads. Move on over to our new home. Await further orders. And stop picking at it, or it won't ever heal.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Berlichtingen: Seanachai, Your history has been added to my 'Word of Peng' site. I do this even though you left out the role of the third (and most Evil) Old One<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Sod that, you appear in righteous glory in "The History of the Peng Challenge Thread Part II: the Hegira, the Patrons, the Dreamtime, and the Old Ones" I'm just too drunk and tired to post that installment tonight. It's already as long as the previous post, and I haven't dealt with the good parts.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Germanboy: Just looking at this makes me wish the Antelope would have aimed better. Where's the Grog Porn™? In honour of Elvis: Tossers.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Sigh...Always with the negative waves, Andreas! Good to see your smiling face again. Did you know that my Landsmann and The French allowed a Million German POWs to die during the war through starvation? Well, not actually my Landsmann, as I don't think Minnesotans were totally to blame. I think it was the Americans that allowed it to happen. Could I buy you dinner some time? Or even lunch? I'm working off an enormous burden of guilt, here.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Smack: Well whatever guys. Seemed like an interesting book, but its funny how the victors automatically put themselves above any wrong doing. Thousands died in overseas American/French camps and you guys dismiss it on a whim? Asking for the topic to be closed makes no sense, thats like saying the holocaust didnt happen. Its a factual book and it has recieved flak from people who dont want to believe that it happened. This isnt the first time ive come across atrocity stories about post WW2 Europe in Camps for Prisoners. In Fact, History Television had a large show about it. How can something like the deaths of almost a million soldiers of starvation not warrant talking about? Lets not put ourselves upon a pedestal and look down and say "I dont like that post because it isnt true" give me proof that what I have writted isnt true! Dont just say "Sounds like Crap"...Do reserch boys and girls. Prove me wrong, but lets not ignore what is being said...<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> A Million prisoners died in American and French POW camps? That sounds like an incredible claim given the over-all German troop levels, those who fought in Russia...hell, let's take a look at that number. The Allied armies in the West took enough German prisoners during the course of the war that a Million of them could die without being noted until very recently? That's a hell of a claim. How many German troops were taken prisoner, overall, by the Western allies? Do you know? I don't, when it comes right down to it. But I find it difficult to believe that a Million of them starved to death. I imagine there was a certain amount of neglect and abuse, as isn't uncommon in wartime, but a Million deaths through abusive negligence? This sounds like utter ****e. Can you site the number of Germans under arms? The number taken prisoner? The number interred in American and French POW camps? Given that the Soviet combat dead for the war was in the nature of 30 Million, combatants and non-combatants, the claim of a Million starved German POWs in the hands of two of the Allied powers, sounds like a load of fetid dingoes kidneys. Perhaps before referencing inflamatory and patently questionable sources, and a single source, at that, you might do some other research? I worked construction with a former Panzergrenadier who said they ran all day in an attempt to find American or British troops to surrender to, as opposed to the Russians. He and his lads were finally taken captive by the Americans. As he was laying brick and barking at me to slop the mud boards more quickly, I can't remember him mentioning word one about watching untold numbers of his fellow POWs starve to death because of American neglect or brutality. A Million dead POWs at American and French hands? Do us all a favour and do a quick report on what the total population of Germany was during the war years. Pillock.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Sancho Panza: And Seanachai it is funny you should mention that, and shows your usual eye for truth. A female friend of mine (never dated her though my wife gets jealous and I think at one point this friend had a very pubescent sort of crush ) anyway she keeps this book where she writes down funny things people say. Of course, I am never in there, and always am I upset that she passes over my humour, for indeed I crack people up regularly. Anyhow, she tells me that my sense of humour was "conceptual" rather than quotable. SO therefore, I find it... interesting... that you should be able, over the difficult medium of a message board, able to have the insight of a pubescent love-struck girl who's known me for YEARS! Oh ho ho.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> It is equally interesting to note that I have the good grace, intelligence, and wit to not hunt you down for this gratuitous insult to my person and kill you like the vermin you are for comparing me to a teenage girl whose only recommendation is that she perceived you as too bloody useless to want to have sex with you. Now, that and the 'psychotic moment' you induced by doing a strange 'Mr. Rogers and the Women Who Had the Good Sense Not to Sleep With Me' aside, why not post Leeo's original text in order to define whether you're a useless, plagiarizing piece o' ****e, or not. Better yet, drag your useless selves, both of you, back to the Peng Challenge Thread and amuse the Seniour Knights by attempting to do 10 pushups using your wits alone. I imagine that much mental effort will have both of you puking on your shoes within moments. [ 09-01-2001: Message edited by: Seanachai ]

Actually, I am sleepy, but the heart felt cries of a former Squire cannot be ignored. Time, I suppose, for another incarnation of the Eternal Thread. Rules are by the book, and out of the can. ALROIGHT, THEN! HEADS UP, MOUTHS CLOSED, AND LISTEN TO THE OFFICER, YOU LOT! The Rules of the Peng Challenge Thread are quite straightforward, really. Astonishingly simple, in fact, in a complex world. First off, no one here likes you, has any desire to know you, and, in fact, the entire sodding Universe doesn't give a stuff what you want or have to say. Go Away. Should you remain on despite the first rule, we next wish you to know that coming in, striking a pose, and challenging everyone in the Thread to a match will cause the wastelands to echo with laughter, and you will look like the stupid pillock you are. You will then be told to Go Away, more forcibly, and people will really begin to mean it. Pick someone out, preferably something as newly arrived and worthless as yourself, taunt and challenge it, and you might get a game. Next, you should sound off as though your wit, courage, and intelligence were not in question. In the vulgate, Sound Off As Though You've Got a Pair! I believe it is. Oh, and more than half a brain, please. If you sound off well, wittily, and with great force of person and humour, you may be accorded a measure of respect here, perhaps for the first time in your doubtless tawdry little life. It's something to look forward to. Finally, while sounding off, we'd like you to remember that this is the Peng Challenge Thread, not your local boozer where every vulgarity, expletive, and prejudicial slur are met by howls of laughter from halfwits who are only 15 minutes and 3 drinks away from spending the night in Detox. We have standards here, whether you can follow the concept or not, and if you ignore or trample them, you will not only be told to Go Away, you will Go Away, both from here, and hopefully the Forum in general. Now, that's our simple rules, told in an unsimple way and at great length. Shortly another of the inmates will probably be along to revile me, and repost them in a shorter and easier to understand version.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Leeo: Oh Bard-'O-the-Thread, can you not realize that Sancho's post was merely a pale imitation of my own? You indeed are one of the Elders, and it is becoming patently obvious that you need new bi-focals. Hate you lots! G'bye now. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Sod that for a lark, and I hope you sort your arse out from a hole in the ground, lad, but I am not one of the 'Elders', I am one of the 'Old Ones'. Also, if you've been abused and ripped off by my former Squire, and wish to make apparent your own recent devilishly clever post and his brutally derivative gibberish, than do a proper citation, you pillock, and let the world know where your spasmodic 'moment of wonder' occured. Do you think I'm the bloody Peng Challenge Thread 'Tooth Fairy' , that notices every bit of useless ****e that plummets from your mouth, and will arrive eventually tuck a £ note under your bloody pillow? Mind, lad, you're not as useless as some, and more horrible than others, and I'd let you walk except for the 'bifocals' remark. Wanker. [ 09-01-2001: Message edited by: Seanachai ]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Joe Shaw: Oh ... Seanachai do you really think I'm going to settle for some trivial post like Herald (no doubt YOU conceive that I would be ANNOUNCING your feats) when I am DUTY BOUND to Prosecute those who would defame the CessPool and Protect the traditions and honor of ... The One The True CessPool? It is a HARD duty but I am resolved to carry it through. Joe<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Damnit, Old Foul Joe, what will it take with you?! The Position of 'Herald' is beyond merely 'honourable', it cuts right to the heart of such concepts as 'Tradition', 'Honour', and 'People Who Get To Decide Whether You're F'ing Useless Or Not'! Alright, then, you bloody difficult swine, could you kindly inform the Old Ones, most of whom, I might add, despise you as the alternative to 'me' , what position you feel might be appropriate? I can't believe that, offered the position of 'Herald' to the Peng Challenge Thread, you'd cut up rough about it and make demands! You swine. Perhaps you'd prefer to have time free to work on you major opus, Winesburg, Utah. [ 09-01-2001: Message edited by: Seanachai ]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Juardis: I have spouted a great deal of gibberish about signatures. I will not find final acceptance from the Old Ones until I amend my ways, and find a worthy signature to support myself by. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> You useless, annoying bloody pillock. It's time we revert to the 'Times of Yore', by which I mean when stupid, but accepted little horrors like yourself were 'called' on being stupid. Your signature file is the means by which you might, and that's a very 'big' might, with a useless swine like yourself, reach out, make a statement, however ephemeral, and use the words of folk far more entertaining than you will ever be to deliver to the rest of us a quote that will make your participation here 'somewhat' worthwhile. Mind, a useless little pillock like yourself is going to run a long, hard, brutal mile to find words to justify their existance here in a Thread that admits eveyone, but honours only the brave and capable. Come up with a decent bloody signature, or be gone henceforth. Wanker. Mind, I think you're capable of being a hero. If not, then fade into oblivon, and die.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Joe Shaw: NO ... LONG WINDED? YOU? You're breaking your style of compendious writing and all for us? May I suggest that the name Seanachai NOT be mentioned more than twice in any given paragraph? And perhaps some of the more lengthy poetry and/or songs might be trimmed? Remember ... there are LAWS against slander pal, and it's entirely possible that, just as there are competing books out about the recent elections, there may be OTHER versions of THIS history too ... have a care. Joe<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Shaw, me lad, you know you live for my Histories of the Peng Challenge Thread. It is one of the Few Stories Worth Telling. Your recent Joseph McCarthy (and that bastard is burning in the hell he configured) posts have been amusing, and educational. But they hint at a larger mission. You've characterized yourself as 'The Prosecutor and Protector of The One The True CessPool'. A noble calling, to be sure. But I would suggest, and offer, as one of the Old Ones, another title. "Herald of the Cesspool" As such, it would offer you an alternative to the rather disturbing 'policeman' role you've taken on. And, it would allow you to pursue your true role as 'Keeper of Tradition'.

Hello, you Universal Soldiers of Disdain. Turns might be a bit delayed, tonight, though I have a long weekend without committments (was rather looking forward to meeting Berli's wife, actually) so I should get a good rate of turnaround after. Another poor, lost lamb has asked about the meaning of 'Peng'. Am now involved in writing a multi-part history of the Peng Challenge Thread. It's long overdue, and it's long-winded in the extreme. Selah.

Can't remember the last time I had a double post. Is the Board crashing again? [ 08-31-2001: Message edited by: Seanachai ]

If this is the real Steven Seagal, it's unlikely that you would understand any explanation that we could offer, but on the chance that your choice of screen name is ironical, I will make an attempt. While Pawbroon's explanation is the most correct, and Sancho's is funnier than many of his posts (you should apply yourself more, Sancho. You do better in the abstract than in direct taunting), my explanation will be the most historical, and, finally, the most long-winded, which is also historically accurate. Historical accuracy is of prime significance on this Board, after all. History of the Peng Challenge Thread, Part I: Origins, Schism, and the Meeks Interregnum The Peng Challenge Thread originated in the early days immediately after the dawn of recorded history (that is, around the time of the Gold Demo, which is equivalent to the Bronze Age of Combat Mission), when a certain individual, that being myself, Seanachai, chose to challenge another individual, Mr. Peng, to a PBEM. It is wrong to maintain that Peng proffered the challenge. Peng, in fact, inspired the challenge. The original Thread, which went to something like 3,000 posts before collapsing into a black hole, was titled "Peng, I Take Our Challenge Public". It can still be visited by the adventurous who find the lost ways, I believe, but further attempts to post to it are impossible. Because many of the members of the Combat Mission forums are as keen on spectacle and as filled with bloodlust as your ancient Roman plebe, it quickly drew the attention of a large and boisterous crowd of the cognescenti (affectionately called 'halfwits' by most), all chanting for blood, offering odds, and chundering out their own taunts and insults, first to the participants, and then, more generally, to each other. Many remained to become Seniour Knights of the Cesspool, a name affectionately bestowed on the place by a long lost teenage landsmann named 'Minnesota Joe', who entered one day, and unceremoniously declared the place to be 'A Cesspool'. He then departed, and no one knows to this day if he still lives. After the rather spectacular death of the first Peng Challenge Thread (people used to show up from other boards just to see if it was true that BTS had let a UBB thread go to that length. BTS, like the scientists who created the Atomic Bomb, not knowing if it's detonation might result in a chain reaction that would annihilate the planet's atmosphere, were apparently keen to see what would happen), there was a flurry as various members started up 'new' Peng Challenge Threads to fill the awful, rending void that the demise of the original had left in the fabric of the Universe, and the hearts of its followers. Also, I understand, there was a certain amount of genteel looting, burning, and pillaging (but not that other thing; a gentleman always asks, and if told 'no' he desists with a murmured apology) as various followers of the Peng Challenge Way took this as a general signal for the End of Civilization As We Know It, and surged out into the night to get in a bit of fun before order could be restored. This led to the first Peng Challenge Thread schism, in which two competing threads were started, and followers hewed to one or the other, and spat insults and invective at the apostates in the other thread. No different, really from what they did to each other within the threads, but from different locations, and it made for a rather nice Holy War effect. The advocates of Orthodoxy, including most of the Seniour Knights, posted to the thread again started by yours truly, entitled "Peng, I Am Still Taking Our Bloody Challenge Public", while some younger Knights and a bunch of heretical 'extras' that wandered in to round out the crowd scenes posted in the evil thread, started by the Arch-Heretic Elijah Meeks, who's Southern US origins and biblical moniker made him the perfect villain for any schism, aided by the fact that he was 'as crazy as a tree full of rats". Eventually, although Crusades were launched, heretics were burned, innocent bystanders were pelted with filth and spittle, the entire matter was decided by BTS (Steve, I believe) who gave the nod of the One True Apostolic Thread to the one begun by Seanachai, and clamped the Inquisitorial padlock of Heresy on the one begun by Elijah Meeks. Meeks, mouthing curses, promising vengeance, and sputtering a bit, then fled to some kind of 'Adventure Vacation/Research Mission' to the arctic circle, where he spent months reading Finnish copies of 'Playboy', longing for Asian women, and grooming a lack-witted California cousin for release on to the Thread as the first step in his revenge. Now, mind, schism is a painful experience for any faith, and while Meeks's apostasy was grievous, his dedication to the Peng Challenge Thread was profound. A solution was attempted. Meeks, who refused to post in the new, One True Revealed Thread until a trial by combat between himself and Seanachai should absolve him, or force him to make obeisance and admit his error, was persuaded to return to the Thread by the offer of a position commensurate with his abilities: he was offered the post of Inquisitor General of the Peng Challenge Thread. Yes, in a brilliant move, seemingly, the originator of schism was set to sniff out heretics. This offer was made more appealing by the fact that the scenario designed for the 'Trial by Combat' was a nasty piece of work intended to humiliate both participants (another Cesspool tradition was born). While brilliant, the results were mixed. Meeks, though undeniably efficient, brutal, and single-minded in a way that would have brought a rush of joy and a happy dance step to the walk of Torquemada himself, was aggressive to the point of psychosis in his drive to make the Peng Challenge Thread all that it should be. First there were murmurs, then voices raised, and then shouts of anger. Meeks responded as only the truly zealous can, by ever harsher and more vicious treatment of the protesters, or 'protestants', as they called themselves. Finally, after 99 newbies were nailed to the doors of the Peng Challenge Thread, Meeks stepped down from his seat of power. He fled into the wilderness, and sightings of him since have been sporadic, at best. Some say he is gone, never to return. Some claim that he waits without, brooding, and will return to the Peng Challenge Thread whenever it is threatened, rabid in his defense and smiting the unbelievers hip and thigh, bringing red ruin down upon them and all detractors of the Holy Mutha Beautiful Thread. Some say he was never a 'real' person, but a creation of the Old Ones. Who knows? The Old Ones know. Go and ask of them about Meeks. Mind, the response'll be 'here, you little sod, bugger off, make yourself useful, get me another beer, now go stand over there with the other lackwitted supplicants and truth seekers, Lor' where do these little pillocks come from, anyways? Another one wanting the 'Truth' about Meeks, Lord love and aquatic fowl. Wankers.' [ 08-31-2001: Message edited by: Seanachai because I figure this one will be locked up soon, and I've only begun Part One of this larger history, and rushed checking it over to get in before the lock.] [ 08-31-2001: Message edited by: Seanachai ]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Panzer76: As I know a lot of you don't read the General Forum, please go over there and read the The Tampa - Australia a disgrace for the civilized world! post. I think it's a very serious issue, and people should be aware of it. Panzer<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Here, pointlessly slandering the Australians on the basis of misinformation, unsupported personal opinions, and illogic? We did that in the Peng Challenge Thread weeks ago, lad, you're way late. It was a right lark, they're a lovely group of swine, the Aussies. I did check out your little thread, though. Have to say our satirical abuse made more sense than your impassioned gibberish. And I'm a member of the left-wing lunatic fringe, mind, not one of your conservative types. Still, I'm willing to bet there's a bit of a jolly sing-song going on aboard the Tampa right now, what?

Bugger. No turns out tonight, as I cannot get my email, nor figure out why not. Will have to contact my ISP during their normal 'customer service' hours, from 3 PM to 3:30 PM, weekdays.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Mark IV: [grog]What the hell is a bloody .306?[/grog] I suppose this means the drinks are off... gawd, I love an Irish wake from a well-heeled family. Pictures of the gaming sister, then?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Look, you swine, I meant .30-06. I'm tired, and I was being repentant. Do you have any idea what repentance does to a man?! No, of course not! Well, Berli does, but not in a good way. None of my sisters are gamers. But they would do their duty to their brother, and either play the bastards out, or have them played. Afterwards, there would probably be a grim Q&A period about the violence level. They would come firmly down on the side of not letting Tiger add gore to the game. Then they would admonish all the current members of the Peng Challenge Thread to not be a load of useless bloody pillocks. Then there would be a bit of giggling, because they already know what a load of pillocks you are. Ya' see, I speak of the Peng Challenge Thread rather at length. Often far past the point where even the most sympathetic would reasonably listen. Then, and only then, they would invite you to the next family holiday. Me Mum already wants to know when Berli's coming up to the Cities, and would like him to stop by a family barbecue. And that, lads and lassies, is just purely terrifying.

Reports of my death, were, apparently, not exagerated enough. Now, while I trust that my sense of humour will always be enough over the top to be recognized as such, I also have a rather horrible habit of verisimilitude in my writing that rather undercut what I had hoped was obvious satire. The whole was motivated by over a week without turns to opponents, long absence from this wonderfully pestilential place, and a general dropping out of sight that, I felt, could not be answered except by humour, even if bad humour. To those such as Madmensch and Stuka, Joe Shaw, and others for whom that kind of news would touch a nerve, I offer an unreserved apology. I am, after all, one of those constantly reminding folk that we often do not know what's going on in people's Real World™ lives, and to think through our abuse somewhat in the interest of not causing unintended and very real pain. As for Emma, well, I would sooner shove a live ferret up my bum than cause her even a moments discomfort or concern. As for the epitaph being in right Cesspoolian style, I would agree, and while I would labour mightily to persuade one of my sisters to deliver such to the Thread in the event of my all too timely demise, I couldn't probably pull it off. My family, for reasons that defy all logic, actually seem to cherish me. Although possibly, in one of those 'smiling bravely, but it would mean so much to me sister dear, please honour this last rather annoying request from a dying brother' style of things, I might work on one of them to appear here and post something of that sort. However, currently I am in disgustingly good health, other than the stress and elevated blood pressure related to some of my PBEMs, except for the one's just started, and I already have doubts about those. Should I suddenly swing over, though, within forehead knuckling distance of death's misty veils, and convince one of my sisters to appear here and post a roight Cesspoolian eulogy, I will have her preface it with: "A Roight Cesspoolian Eulogy for that miserable bastard known formerly and forevermore as Seanachai, the useless toad" or somesuch. Now, after a week of complete collapse occasioned by nothing more serious nor interesting than angst and moral decay, I still have several thousand posts to catch up on in what might be as many as 3 Peng Challenge Threads, so I wil say ado for now, and attempt more anon. Also, should I ever pass away in some bizarre contretemps with zoo animals, which actually happens on a fairly regular basis here in America's heartland, where alcohol is easy to come by and common sense is sometimes sadly lacking amongst the Double-Wide owners set (the Texans among us know that I'm talking about their dream homes, and the future glider toys of the next tornado to come down the alley they live in), I would, in fact, force one of my sisters or their dependents to finish playing all my games. Why, right here in Minnesota, where chromosomal damage is at a minimum compared to our neighbours to the south, we had some lads climb into the polar bear enclosure at the local zoo in the wee hours of the morning in order to impress and amuse their young ladies, and one of the polar bears, first disturbed by their activity, and then annoyed to find they hadn't brought any beer into the cage with them, proceeded to give one of them a serious mauling. A hastily summoned keeper had to shoot the bear with a .306 in order to save the lad's life. Letters to the editor ran about 3-1 on the side that the keeper had shot the wrong dumb chum. In any case, Cesspool, Oh my Cesspool, I'm back, and alive. There, there, try and contain yourselves. Oh, you were. Carry on, then. -Seanachai Old One, and Knight of the Woeful Sense of Humour

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by PawBroon: Bowed over the keyboard, displaying his usual amount of obnoxious penmanship, Senility was about to post again. The raging Thrust (sit down Bauhaus) of his chubby fingers flooding the MBT with what could have been better summed up with a simple “Where’s Marcel?” by any of us Elders... Oh boy! Do I miss the little twit… Marcel, man to man, as a French, do you pluck your eyebrows?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Good Christ. I understood every single word and nuance of this post from beginning to end on the first read through, and I laughed my arse off. Gentlemen, and our Ladies, either I have 'arrived', or I am moments from death. Either would suffice as an explanation for the phenomena. Now, I am still getting caught up on the glories of the Peng Challenge Thread, so I shan't post more at this time. Good to see The French wading through the puddles of most souls to post the first arrival of dawn on the eastern horizon. What the hell are the rest of you pillocks doing? By the way, you French lunatic, where's my turn?!

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Speedy: Lorak let it be known throughout the MBT: Seanachai, what odds will you give me? <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I will give you, lad, the same odds the gods gave me: That you'll be born, that you will die, and spend all the time between in wondering why. Now, lad, I've summed up the human condition for yet another of you Aussie idjits. I'm going to have to start charging for this pretty soon. I'll take as my payment for elucidating the most basic principals in the Universe either a fair set-up, and your ultimate destruction, or the lyrics of a bloody good sing-song. It's all one to me. And as much as I like destroying Opponents, I prefer a really good song. [ 08-14-2001: Message edited by: Seanachai ]