jdmorse
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Posts posted by jdmorse
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All right you legal beagle's I know you are out there.... Since as a class of scum sucking bottom dwellers and despised by the world at large, even though they need , fear and pay us we are not given our due.
Not grognards, 'poolers or hamsterlovers, yet we inhabit this space in the nooks and corners, unrecognized and unacknowledged. The time to change this is at hand, to emerge into the light, our stolid and staid ranks of grey pinstripe glistening in the sun....
Recently, one of the few self acknowledged, out of the closet lawyers, Jake (the Lawyer) had a little mini tournament. Well, I have recently challenged THE LAWYER to a rematch of an earlier game. So thinks I, why not have a little world of PBEM opponents of the various Bars of the world?
So let the call go forth, from this place and time, if you are openly a lawyer, member of a recognized bar, have a JD or similar degree, work in the legal profession or append esq. after your name, I invite you to post here, with your thoughts and suggestions and start drafting up the summons, subpoena duces tecum's, interrogatories and start filing and serving away.
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The Lawyer's credo: Covering the earth like a plague of locusts - Mace
[This message has been edited by jdmorse (edited 11-20-2000).]
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nijis....your wanker reply to Croda/YK2 is about as weak limp wristed fey and milktoast as they come. THAT is why you do not amount to cat spit. Not even a hairball.
Croda took pity on you (and I shall have words with him), he demonstrated out of kindness the bile, spleen and cahungas (sorry YK2...only literary, not literal....we know YOU have them!) that is required here. You got to wade back in here and call him the mysogistic lovechild of a blind ass and a sheeploving Kiwi sheepshagger. Not soem ohhhh my feelings are hurt.
Now go away (hint: If you do, you aren't worthy. - and yes we are selfcentered and egotistical and totally caught up in our own pretensions and delusions. that's why we are here. You DO NOT ask admittance. You tear it's freakin guts out, gnaw on the entrails, vomit out the residue and fart, scratching your privates (or a reasonable facsimile or substitute) and push back.
Now sod off, you are tiresome
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The Lawyer's credo: Covering the earth like a plague of locusts - Mace
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Jake, jake, jake....
True I am evil, that is the nature of thngs and I can glory in the righteous defense of taking money from those that don't deserve it, just as I shall relieve you of your honor and battle aucumen.
After our initial meeting I had to retire for a perod of meditation and spiritual communion, to reflect on the mistakes I made, to draw substance from the earth to be renewed. And like the mark of the beast you shall go amongest them and convince them that you are the good lawyer. And you will point to me and say, Look there, avoid that one, follow me, and they shall, poor deluded fools.
I await your pleasure with antici......pation that the earth will tremeble when Esquires collide....
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The Lawyer's credo: Covering the earth like a plague of locusts - Mace
[This message has been edited by jdmorse (edited 11-20-2000).]
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Jake
I win you pusilliamous legal hasbeen. True you won before but applying your logic of above, only another lawyer who stayed out of the fray can win. After all never vote for someone who wnats the job.
Your skills are weak old man, send me a set up if you dare , punk
Regards
JD, esq.
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The Lawyer's credo: Covering the earth like a plague of locusts - Mace
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Awwwwww right Hiram...... lol
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For the "pinkies there is an easy fix.... open the bmp in a graphics program. sample the color in the pink areas....note the readings and compare them to areas that do not show up, often you'll note the values are just a bit different. In graphics maker it should read 300, 100,100. Often the saturation value is like 97%, thus the "pinkies" occur. Just change the values to the correct setting, use the paintcan tool to re-apply for the appropriate area, save, close reload, viola, no more ugly pink
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The dank fog seizes tight on the moor, in the distance an animal howls in tortured pain. Three figures emerge from the misty tendrils and overlook a decaying and fetid landscape. Standing there musing over this too transient triumph of man, the full moon, yellow and gibbous, comes up out of an overflow of silver light in the north-east. They notice movement below them in the distance. The bright little figures ceased to move about below, a noiseless owl flitted by, and shivering with the chill of the night. the three travelers determined to descend and investigate this fallen ruin
The tallest of the figures, an aging warrior, his body not what it was in his youthful prime, yet possessing a head of greying hair and a steely gaze. He has faced many opponents of various and sundry kinds and bested most. A battered briefcase adorns his side. His companions, one a malformed hunchback and the other with a penchant for young woolie things gaze before them.
Croda: What place is this?
JD: It is the once and mighty 'pool young croda. Once I thought it could be your and Peter's birthright, but now...... (shaking head)
PNZ: What happened hee and who are those creatures?
JD: They are called Morlocks, devolved descendants of this lands inhabitants.(eyes misting over as an inner vision clouds his mind) Ahhh the pool, the pool.It was a place of power and glory. In the old times mighty warriors strode these halls (kicking aside a pile of refuse as small furry things scurry into the darkness) Se'achi, he who found this place;and the mythical and legendary Peng; M'eks of Hamster lore; Bauhaus, the seated one; G'boy, Lorak, the mad elven king, Berli the Loki of our world; Shaw and his , well never mind; the fair Joanna and others, now all but a memory. We were young and impetuous in those days, wild beyond measure, we thought we were invincible, that the thread would go on forever. But we were wrong. In our Promethean hubris we were struck down,Cesspoolnarok and the golden age faded from memory.
PNZ: But what of this place?
JD: We built again on the ashes of the old. We thought that it's time would continue, now I am not so sure. Once I called this place home. Invectitude, taunts, bile and blood were regularly spilled. We feasted and raged, meade was consumed in prodigious amounts. It was our dream that others would come and carry on the old ways. You two have been trained in those arts and my heart is full to see that I chose well.
But now, the French scurry about, there are silly word games, as croda you know too well, they have become lazy and do not boast of their accomplishments. Literary reference and allusion flowed like honey from meloforus tongues. Words mattered, not in quantity but how they were used. Ahh cleverness and creativity, those were the marks. The old ones rarely are seen here now. I care not of their gender but can they fight and spit in their crushed and humiliated enemies eye. Aye that was the pool.
Come boys, let us go down and find a place to sleep tonight. On the morrow we shall see if there is any greatness left in this place.
[This message has been edited by jdmorse (edited 11-17-2000).]
[This message has been edited by jdmorse (edited 11-17-2000).]
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Retournez a la cesspool, maintenant! tout de suite.
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My bad, ugly DP due to timedelay, can Cesspoolnarok be far away?
[This message has been edited by jdmorse (edited 11-16-2000).]
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Lord High Chamberlain of the Pool
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Posted elsewhere by Crudogfacedboy <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>There invariably seems to come a time during a game when I issue forth an:
"Exactly what was it about this plan that made me think it would work?"
Followed shortly thereafter by:[headinhands]I can not believe I'm going to lose again.[/headinhands]
And though rarely spoken aloud, my fingers always seem to find a way to : Alt-U
Damn I hate that keystroke!<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
My faithful squire, isn't time to unclasp those bony and shriveled fingers and once again go to the source, the balm for your self loathing and stroke those keys once again. You know you do, you feel them calling you, release, it will be soooo easy. Your toppelment is at hand, embrace the darkness.
SleepswithSheepNZ Your toppelment has already occurred, the only question is how much more goo and viscera I have to scrape from my tank treads.
Chupbacca said a few days ago: <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>
JDHorseface certainly does have an interesting take on our game. Funny, considering what's about to happen to him.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>Well I have been on pins and needles, let me tell you. Fitfully sleeping have I been. Worried I was. Dreadful things he promised. So finally the turn, of which much was promised arrives. With much shaking and tremebling of bowels I hit "play". Smashing and horrible artillery falls from the grey antedeluvian sky, a lone tank brews up. Damn....that was fine. It was his tank, perhaps his last, and the artillery plowed some nice furrows in the empty fields. My Panthers and lick their claws at the meal in front of them.
MeekHamsterMessianichandchosenAntichrist has been reduced to observing "Gee I think I got one of your TC's, huh?" Meanwhile the flags fall, and a whole world of hurt is coming his way.....and I deliver on what I promise.
MarlmuttofRune and Hieryomus proceed apace.Lessartyowes a turn. Cough it up bagel boy.
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Lord High Chamberlain of the Pool
[This message has been edited by jdmorse (edited 11-16-2000).]
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YK2 I am glad we have a Lady of the Pool, for who else can true kniggits dedicate their quests to....very Aurthurian. Course Kitty is welcome to preform topplement if she can. In this brave new pool of ours it runs red with blood from tooth and claw.
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Lord High Chamberlain to the Pool
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Croda and Marlowe......Rune and I have been conversing about the evilness to bevisited upon you.....my word to you both, be afraid, be VERY afraid
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Lord High Chamberlain to the Pool
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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Marlow:
Then I propose that the impending cage match between JDmorse and Rune be for one of the Lordly Titles.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
rune's and my clash will happen, but at a time and place in the future. Thus it would not be allowed to be a Floridian kind of experience. Hey we will get back to you and fill the vacancies. No this requires Lordships and fealty to be established immed.
I think a requirement for titleship is that you have to fight and hold your fief. You must defend against all interlopers, of a suitable background of course. Rune probably cannot maintain such distractions from his Olympian diversions. Hey we are starting to sound like the WBF. Need to be a sanctioned match and if no title defense, it's stripped
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Lord High Chamberlain to the Pool
[This message has been edited by jdmorse (edited 11-15-2000).]
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Okay then, let's see the current lineup, it's about as clear as Meeks' artillery usage....
Since I have laid claim to entitlement, who contests my right?
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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>My inner Croda says it has a growing fondness for you.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>-Pawbroom
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Loch Peng it is then
Who is the victime of my legaltruppen?
[This message has been edited by jdmorse (edited 11-15-2000).]
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Since the rush to spoils and titles seems to be occurring I should lay claim to Lord High Chamberlain of the Pool. As the pool's first openly legal participant, associations of fiefdoms, realty and enoeffment do not apply to one whose services and loyalty can be bought for the appropriate dinara.
As an advisor and counselor by profession it seems that the same position applies, much like Richlieu my power derives from education, negotiations and incriminating pictures, which mind you I have on all of you.
As to my qualifications, well I am evil...a lawyer and certainly no general, all appropriate for behind the scenes advisor. So Lorak, list me as Lord High Chamberlain of the Pool, my squires will speak for my character and kindly fatherly attention I have lavished on their training and care.
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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>My inner Croda says it has a growing fondness for you.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>-Pawbroom
[This message has been edited by jdmorse (edited 11-15-2000).]
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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Elijah Meeks:
I declare myself Lord of Schloss Peng, given that Seanachai never completed that battle and therefor it is mine.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>Damn it Meeks, I thought the mediciation had your messainc delusions of graduer in check. Well we shall need to up your meds. Nurse Croda, the thorazine if you please. Now strap the patient down and we shall have Nurse Sheepyshagger do a body cavity search. <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR> Anyone who wants it will have to take it from my dead hands. Ya ha! Let the insanity begin!<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> He is raving and hallucinating again, may I remind you you are being shagged and bagged in our current PBEM, monsieur Frenchie. So you are losing to me fer gawd's sakes, so that makes you lower than a lawyer. *shudder*
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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>My inner Croda says it has a growing fondness for you.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>-Pawbroom
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A park bench somewhere....birds are singing the sky bright and a radiant sun shines forth. Evil Transcendent is sitting next to Evil Incarnate....
JD: (nudging rune) Ahh look at the little tykes, playing at being grownups. Reminds me of the old days. Before you know it, youth is gone and you are settled with a family, responsibilities. Not like before
rune: (smiling wistfully) Yes boys will be boys. I do hope they don't hurt themselves. MARLOW! Now you stop that this instant. Little Croda might not understand that you are only funning with that sharp stick.
You know, we were once that energetic, so full of our own importance, so sure we had the world in the palm of our hands, invincible. Now look at us Like some Robin and the Sheriff, we've gotten ourselves in it again.
JD: True, but think of it rune, to feel the blood lust of battle again, coursing thru our veins....course these days we'll probably get an aneurysm.
rune: (chuckles)
Evil Transcendent and Evil Incarnate smile to themselves, their squires frolicking about, lost in far away thoughts........
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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>My inner Croda says it has a growing fondness for you.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>-Pawbroom
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Well put my faithful squires, this rune and his misbegotten git know not what they have unleashed.....
However, do not think that we can relax our guard. Training is ever vigilant. Croda, more VT is on it's way and your topple/dismemberment is just about complete as my reserves have yet to be brought into play. Just one more tincan to light up like last round and you will be 0-6. Congratualtions my boy, a rare acheivement. I am so proud.
Sheepsrunningshagger let's dispatach the remaning shattered remmants of your once proud armored force and grind you into proper sevility. After all it is a bit of bad form to remind everyone that you beat me in our first game. Let's let the past go and focus on the present where you have left a broken series of hulks in what can only be termed as the most incredible series of tactiacl mistakes yet seen by man. Your willingness to lie down beneath my treads is truly a demonstration of filial piety
Now boys, try not to soil the carpet with Marlow's entrails, there's the good lads. Oh and Croda? The Belt? if you please.
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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>My inner Croda says it has a growing fondness for you.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>-Pawbroom
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rune you onotological metaphysical spawn of ego and telos, you immanent and yet sadly transcendent fool.....
I look forward to the ultimate toppelment of your ersatz glory. While you predate me old one you are mired in the past reliving your importance. As to the old pool I have been here since the second post ole fellow.
You think your idle threats and posturing with the sacred Rod of NDA causes me to fear you. Think again. Remember who and what I am. I have chewed up such things for breakfast and barely broken wind, I have ground such into the bloody fields that caused much wailing and corporate lamentations. Wrap your self in idle threats of delay and legal claptrap. I care not that I bring down the firmament as long as I rip from your quiviering chest your still beating heart to sacrifice to the gods of war.
I shall abide sir, I shall abide your coming. Delay, and avoidance are no strangers to me.
Speak not ill of my squires, they know how to properly serve their liege as long as you don't turn you back) and Croda does seem to have a 0-5 record on the pool tally chart, due to an unfortunate accident when his birth mother first saw him, well nevermind, but I see greatness in him and Peter can and will tie Marlow in nice juicy spittable morsels, may I suggest in the fog, at night, in the snow.
So go rune, diddle your ...er nevermind, and fiddle with your tcp/ip excuses. The gauntlet still lies where thrown a blazing mark to you calling for the satisfaction of honor. Let us retire then and observe the perturbations and mayhem our squires present for our amusement.
Oh by the way the song was such a lovely sing song, brought tears of pride to me mum's eyes. A lawyer that is praised is faint praised indeed. You have caught some of my inner croda. *sniff* just lovely.
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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>My inner Croda says it has a growing fondness for you.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>-Pawbroom
[This message has been edited by jdmorse (edited 11-15-2000).]
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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Elijah Meeks:
A fray! A fray!!! Yes, JDmorse must face Rune in a battle ...<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
A fray, yes, but a fair fray for a farthing. This is not some kniggit feasting orgiastic peep den, this is the real thing, at 50 paces. Nor for Kniggithood as we both are of that rank.......none of your mystical parasitic symbiosis Meeks, this is personal, he has dared to greet me on CMHQ as a pedantic pompous petulant pendlous and purile lawyer. Of course I am but, facts are mere illusions in this brave new world of the pool.
You yourself participated in your own topplement avoidence with the fair Seanatch. So step aside, let the ruined one answer.
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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>My inner Croda says it has a growing fondness for you.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>-Pawbroom
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FYI
Original thread approx 3017 posts
Current thread 1954
Total silliness 4971
[This message has been edited by jdmorse (edited 11-15-2000).]
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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by rune:
jdmorse dares to defy me?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Yes, you are but a mere beta god, the ancient rites of sycophancy are dead, the old gods make way, Joseph Campbell like, to a new order of things. We no longer worship the old ways, devotion to ancient and sorcerous ways may have held the proles in check in the past but the times they are a changin'. You retire to your sanctorum, and cackle about your new evilness. Bah! What CE2 and VoT2. I've seen them, more of the same. The Bulge? Hah! Mace will be ground beneath my tread. Bocage? Hah, Hah! well actually that's pretty good, but ahem, where was I? Your time is through old man! Your day is past, you are living on the gnawed bones of past glory.
Lesser lights and the stolid and staid high priest of a long faded glory hold no draw for me. I honor your past old man, you were once a colossus bestride the CM world, now you are just a beaksbreath of flatulence that wafts through this turgid world as you deign fit. We do not bend our knees to you nor our sacred honor. You prove it continuously on the battlefield, your worth and glory, You prove it by invective and spleen, you do not sit back and cogitate on faded accomplishments as you rock on the porch.
Granted weaker souls may tremble in your presence but not I for I am <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>A mere lawyer..<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> and thus I fling back your spite, vile and bilious cacophony of weakened drool. I stand and tell you you have proved nothing to us, save that you are long winded and believe that you, the beta god, princess of evil should be taken seriously. You wrap yourself in a mantle of unapproachability a beta god, but I have played beta gods before (true Fionn rather handily dismembered me...er never mind)
You lay claim to the rights honor and privileges of a kniggit, you yearn for the sacred duties of squiring, squirming young flesh to kniggithood. Consider my squires Croda, PeterNZ (well best not go there) Yet you will not accept the obligations of the office, to fight, to best or be bested on a bloody field in a FAIR match.
Until you come out of the hallowed marble halls of your recluse and meet me on the field of battle you are beyond my ken, my spite and contempt. You may ignore me but the challenge is well and fairly laid. The gauntlet recumbent at your feet puts lie to your sanctity. You may ignore me but like a purulent sore I shall be here until hell overfreezes. Until you best me, you are dusty history of a once mighty but now laughable has been. Rise your self, Sir runiation, your honor, your manhood has been questioned....by a mere lawyer. It is time to walk the earth of mortals once again and show the cognoscenti you are worthy of our paeans.
As the Pool is my witness, What say you?
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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>My inner Croda says it has a growing fondness for you.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>-Pawbroom
[This message has been edited by jdmorse (edited 11-15-2000).]
The Lawyer's Challenge
in Combat Mission Archive #2 (2000)
Posted
<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Chupacabra:
Are either of you ambulance chasers? Cos I have this trick where I can throw out my shoulder. Say the word, big money.
<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
Chuppie, baby, have your girl call mine and send me the freakin turn or I'll get jake the snake to bite ya.
Jake.....no, sorry, I fail to see that you have trademarked nor registered with the appropriate governmemt agencies. Besides, I am posting from a location where such laws are studiously ignored. Nonetheless, in the spirit of compromise .... any semblance betweent this thread and that of "Lawyer" is purely accidental and/or coincidental and/or deliberate, but we don't care. So sue me big boy.
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The Lawyer's credo: Covering the earth like a plague of locusts - Mace