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The Blooper Reel


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Meeting engagement cant remember the point. I think it was 2000 points. I was Germans enemy was British. Moved 2 companies, a PZIV(70), a hetzer through a large open field to the left of a large town. Moved 4 companies and a PVIV towards the town. Town was setup on the right side of the map.

Enemy made the mistake of revealing his tanks shooting at my infantry. I took care of him at range with my TDs. 2 dead British Sherman 76s and my force making good headway.

While this is happening he is rushing the town with WASPS burning the place up. I drop 2 spotters worth of 120s into the place and kill 4 of the buggers and route 2 toons. By this time I am closing in towards the back of the town and boxing him in. I have 2 companies behind 3 large buildings.

By this time I have shot up his lone AT gun which happened to disable the gun on my hetzer.

I rush the last remaining building he has in the town and get cut down in the road. And entire company is cut down in the streets. All I had to do is hold the flags which I already owned and would of won. Of course I have to go. So I get an email the next day demanding I recieve a minor loss. His reasoning is he killed a company and disabled the gun. Dont forget I had him boxed into a small corner on the map, shot up a lot of his infantry, I still have 2 intact companies and 2 weathered companies, and he had no armor left.

I never even replied and let him suckle the sweat off my nutz. He sent a few nasty emails but didnt bother.

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Well thank goodness I have never encountered a bad opponent yet. Everyone I've played has been very nice, helpful and courteous and we always have ended every game 1. by me being beat :D and 2. happily and satisfied. Well, except for that one gamey guy and you know who you are. Just kidding of course. tongue.gif;)

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A QB where a Greyhound comes screaming along a road, through a gully and up the otherside to take my German inf in the rear...he's hurtling along...the full 55mph...until the 60th second...when all CM vehicles mysteriously freeze...and that's just when Private Snotwurst pulls the trigger on his Panzerfaust. At second 60+0.5 the speeding/now frozen Greyhound goes boom!

Ah...we'd all like to think Pte Snotwurst deserved the Iron Cross 3rd class, but really, it was just that mysterious bug that CM has about vehicles being able to do 55mph..then 0..then spring back next turn to the full 55mph. Strange but true!

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Or this one...from a current PBEM of mine.

I've got a Hetzer doing a sterling job as my only tank killer on the map. Poor bugger has to keep switching from one side of a wooded hill to the other to ward off the depredations of the Amerikaner filth. Unfortunately, on two separate occasions I have had to plot the little TD to hunt-reverse-hunt-reverse its way up the slope crabwise (so as to avoid showing flank to the Shermans it's trying to pop). Was I plotting just a little too fast while fending off my 2 1/2 y.o. daughter? Is that why I continued to hit U instead of alternating with R? So, on two separate turns (I should have learnt, d'oh!), the Hetzer has hunted, turned to bare its arse, toddled away 20m, turned again... *sigh*

Still, it has survived so far (T20) and has a proud score of 3 Shermans and 2 Greyhounds. :cool:

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Here's one that just happened recently. I had this 6 man squad ( yeah had been reduced ) advancing toward their objective and they happened upon this 5 man abandoned gun crew. Well, I thought I'd just gain myself some points by jogging over and eliminating them real quick like. You know, a no contest type of thing, after all they only had pistols to my BAR, Tommy gun and 4 semi-auto M1's. No problem right? Yeah right. Anyway, I ran my guys over to within 9 meters when the abandoned gun crew opened up on them. My guys stopped of course and returned fire. Well they fought for a while and the gun crew wiped out 5 of my 6 guys - WITH PISTOLS! for the love of God. My guys even threw 3 grenades. I may have killed one of theirs but I don't think I even did that. How weird is that? I couldn't believe it and ran it over and over but nope it was true. So I guess you never know. I wish I had kept it because I would like to look at it again because I still don't believe it.

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Lee,

While I share your amazement, I still felt a sort of deep satisfaction reading that.

That'll teach you, trying to kick virtually unarmed guys around ;)tongue.gif

I had an incident here also of some moral undertone. Heavy fog, enemy advancing and me lying hull down in ambush, waiting. I had 12 (!) M18's aiming at an angle down the corridor of advance of what I think was eight Panthers moving in formation. Panthers appear (only my scouts had sighted them before), I smile and watch the movie roll on with complete anticipation of satisfaction, all my first rounds miss, the Panthers retaliate, seven of mine detonate in a fantastic array of explosions. As I recovered from attacks of rage and disappointment, it struck me - isnt there a qouote from the Bible on this? The "if you dig a hole for others" one?

Cheerio

Dandelion

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Dandelion I wasn't going to kill them just kind of scare them off. redface.gif Beside they started it. :D Well, I feel better now after hearing your poor story. Now that would make you sick. Was that a Pbem or against the AI? I hope the AI, cause you won't ever live that down if it was a live opponent. If an opponent can you imagine the grin that must have appeared on his face? I bet it went from ear to ear. Bet he had himself a beer after that and probably smoked a cigerette. :D Ok I think you topped everybody with that one. What a horror story. Maybe I might play you some time. :D

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Told you I can't play anything but German. smile.gif As it is, the German crews are Crack and Veteran in this setup (with some Regulars). That means they see farther than my crews in the fog. A bit bizarre, but I guess its an unfortunate consequence of having better spotting. Anyway, the Panthers had already started to target my vehicles when my first volley of failed rounds went off. Thus the extremely swift response. Had he used recon, he could in fact have stopped short of my LOS, taken his time and blown all of us from the horison without us ever even seeing him. That would have been even more amusing. So its not a bloper really. Bad leadership from my side.

Human opponent. Normally we comment events a lot each turn. After that turn, he didn't write a word on the game. He asked how's the weather and such instead you know... That's ok... I'll try remember telling what the weather is like to some half-dead survivor from among the captured bleeding, smoking debris of his crushed forces, the weather in the northern tip of Scotland that is, he'll need to know after I ship him off to go work on a sheep farm in some very faraway, icy and rainy corner of the Hebrids... :mad:

Things have since improved slightly, we have a number of burning enemy too now. But remember when I adviced you to not let rage dictate orders? Well, you might as well take my advice as I'm not using it. Issued some really stupid orders the turns immediately following.

Regards

Dandelion

[ June 08, 2003, 05:30 AM: Message edited by: Dandelion ]

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Yeah Dandelion I can just see you punching in commands after that - event? God knows I've done the same and regretted it but it sure is hard not to do things in anger or frustration. Well, at least he didn't ask " Did you see that, how cool was that anyway , didn't you just love watching all your TD's going up in smoke like that?" :D Oh, you meant when you said you couldn't play anything other the German's that you weren't worth a crap at playing anything other then the German's? tongue.gif I see, guess I misunderstood your meaning earlier. :D Also let me remind you that there are no bad leaders just stupid followers. :D

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