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...hurl feces like a chimp trick! He is quite good at it, dontcha know?!"

"But who cares about a Chinese Elvis impersonator?! I am MUCH more likeable!" Screamed Mace to no one in particular, but somehow the gods of fast cut editing heard his heed and the story soon focused again on our intrepid, and somewhat wool covered, hero.

With that being said our hero Mace thrusted his hips forward and hurled...

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Originally posted by jshandorf:

With that being said our hero Mace thrusted his hips forward and hurled...

...a few words together and posted them to the faq, making up for almost 2 days absence!

"Let me tell you", Mace said, "being stuck interstate without a PC is hell. Not being able to post the bulletin board - hell. Not being able to play CMBO - hell."

But he was now back at home sitting in front of his PC, but he was still not happy!

He didn't care if he couldn't post to the bulletin board, he didn't care if he couldn't play CMBO. There was something missing, something that when it occurred made his life much more complete, and that was.....

Mace

[This message has been edited by Mace (edited 02-21-2001).]

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...called Tellitubies! Those frolickin lil' homosexual Britons made Mace all giddy and happy inside. He wished he could jump into his TV and partake in their little sing-songs! "Hell," Mace thought, "One of them even looks like a pink sheep!"

Giving it no second though, Mace took a deep breath and plunged...

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I sure do wish I was hung...

Or maybe just tied up. In bed. With one of my barnyard friends and a pair of velcro gloves. I sure hope my girlfriend never has kids, I don't need anyone else in my life to go Baaa. (Sheep sound) I mean, what would happen if...

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Well my skiff's a twenty dollar boat, And I hope to God she stays afloat.

But if somehow my skiff goes down, I'll freeze to death before I drown.

And pray my body will be found, Alaska salmon fishing, boys, Alaska salmon fishing.

The Last Defense- Mods, Scenarios, and more!

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Originally posted by 109 Gustav:

I mean, what would happen if...

....someone tried to deflect the subject matter to someone else more deserving, like that likeable lawyer, JD.

It was just then that a terrible mistake was discovered. Likeable and lawyer was an Oxymoron. Likeable, lawyer and JD even more so.

The faq readers did yell! The faq readers did cry! The faq readers did run for the Dictionary to look up the word "Oxymoron"!

The faq readers grabbed their large...

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Originally posted by Mace:

....someone tried to deflect the subject matter to someone else more deserving, like that likeable lawyer, JD.

It was just then that a terrible mistake was discovered. Likeable and lawyer was an Oxymoron. Likeable, lawyer and JD even more so.

The faq readers did yell! The faq readers did cry! The faq readers did run for the Dictionary to look up the word "Oxymoron"!

The faq readers grabbed their large...

...enclopedia of sheep written by Mace. Chapter 1 is titled "Sheering and Shagging"

Not to be outdone, our Australian hero tugged on his...

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...servant's cord. Ahhh.. I mean the rope thingy by the bed that summoned the servant. As he pulled the cord somewhere in the mansion Mace's man servant heeded the call and proceeded to his master's room.

Within a few short minutes the antechamber door to Mace's luscious but contemporary bed room, styled in a expressionist artists taste, with cubist paintings of sheep adorning the walls, opened. A short, balding, ugly, troll doll of man entered. His limp was as pronounced as the large hump on his back. He slowly lurched is way forward and stopped by the bedside.

"How may I serve you, Maaaaaathster?" The ugly little servant spoke with a lisp.

"Yes, JD. Fetch me margo from the pen. I am feeling rather frisky tonight."

"But, maaaaaaathster, margo kicked JD lathst time he went to fetch her. Margo hurt JD. JD scared of margo. Please, Maaaaaathster, don't make JD fetch margo." The little troll-like man servant shuffled from foot to foot obviously scared and nervous.

"I told you to fetch her! Now do it, man, or I will see that you limp on both legs!" Mace commanded.

The smelly, foul, little servant beast turned to leave but at that moment...

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When nuclear weapons are frozen then only freezers will have nuclear weapons.

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