jd

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Stuka: Question to the pool: If a hard working, strikingly handsome yet all round great guy comes home to find his CM cd removed from the drive and her Soldier of Fortune disc in its place, is that grounds for anullment? Prior to the fact? Ceterus parabis...Caveat emptor....there must be a legal term for this, surely?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> The legal term is, I believe.... "whipped!" ------------------ If frogs had uzi's, snakes wouldn't mess with them so much. - Hiram [This message has been edited by jd (edited 01-19-2001).]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Jarhead: I dream? have I found my place in life? This is Where you all went. Right under my nose all along. In "The Pool." For Gawd sake. *ATTENTION!* I would like to welcome myself to "The Thread." Also Make some room, because here I come. Running... Leaping high... Head first... <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>ALL RIGHT YOU MAGGOT (no that would be insulting to a certain group of insects, much higher on the evolutionary scale as yourself) ALL right you putrescent pus filled boil on a sheeps sphincter (and with the ones around here that's a dangerous thing to be) WHAT MAKES YOU THINK YOU DESERVE OR HAVE WHAT IT TAKES TO BE IN THIS MANS CESSPOOL. Look forward when I am talkin to ya boy. Now spew the reasons you should be considered. Hell Hamsters have more cojones than you. That's YES DRILL SAR'JENT SIR!!! I CAN'T HEAR YA. Yer nuthin but a momas wussy boy, comin in here and thikin ya might belong. So show what ya got recruit before we bust ya out and let the sheepshaggers have at ya. THAT IS ALL NOW PISS OFF YA WANKER! ------------------ If frogs had uzi's, snakes woudn't mess with them so much. - Hiram

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Mace: Oh yeh, while I'm at it.....Lorak, post a drumming for poor old Macey at the hands of Mr Morse. I was foolish enough to be selected by Mr Evil-personified (ie Rune) as the allies in his Battle of the Bulge scenario, and Joe Morse the Germans. I'm sure that Mr Morse, being the fine example of a lawyer that he is, will be here soon to boast, rant and dance on my still warm body, and then charge me consultation fees. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> True so true. This bit of runnette evilness features SPOILER ALERT + + + + + + + + + + + + 70 Chaffees vs about 20 KT's I lost 8 he lost 69 with the last one pinned in the corner. 50 turns of plodding and laving a trail of burning hulks. It took him 3/4 of the game to realize that trading frontal shots at 44 m's the Chaffee loses to a KT. However, note that a number of KT's were left along the way due to track hits, a particular vulnerability. While I will not gloat on my esteemed southern brothers handling of his forces (facts speak for themselves) the fact that he found masochistic pleasure in being slaughtered makes me concerned. Thank heavens the width of the Pacific separates us and sheep are not plentiful here. So Lorak chalk up a major victory for jdm over that Anzac roadkill Mace. ------------------ If frogs had uzi's, snakes woudn't mess with them so much. - Hiram [This message has been edited by jd (edited 01-19-2001).]

What is it a full moon tonight? Check in at 11pm PDT and see a whole bunch of ****e weridness, mostly with Meek's name attached. Poor daft bugger, taking the Raider's loss a bit to heart are we. BTW if you can post such psychotic musings you can get a turn out. 'Fraid the inmates have control of the aslyum. No wonder Hiram is not to be seen. With Meeks in his stalker mode. Time for "Dora" the industrial strength brick. ------------------ If frogs had uzi's, snakes woudn't mess with them so much. - Hiram

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by jshandorf: So, which limp bastards are brave enough to take me on. I need to pad my stats some more since 9-3 doesn't nearly scream "I RULE!" like 12-3 would.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>A dusty border town. The sun shines mercilessly down on dusty streets as dust devils whirl and dance, their hyperactive call. No shadows are cast and an air of expectancy whispers it's desires. It is high noon. The silence is broken by the shaky plinking of an out of tune piano, playing a long out of date song issuing from within the cavernous darkness of the buildings interior. Muted voices lilt from time to time as the inhabitants, hidden behind the swinging half doors seek to forget the misery that awaits them outside. A figure, riding a horse comes to a stop outside of the building. His eyes conveying no emotion, but the sweat beads on his brow as he contemplates his intention. After the barest hesitation he swings down and strides to the doorway. For the briefest of moments his courage deserts him, yet compelled he pushes his way into the fetid interior, his eyes slowly adjusting to the light. The patrons, if that is what you can call them, a collection of villainy and scum, drifters and sheepshaggers, who find solace in remaining out of sight and in some cases, out of the law's hands, look up at the intrusion to eye the recent arrival. Bloodshot and rheumy eyes take in the shining black leather- ette clothes that encase the stranger. Straggly blond hair escapes a wide brim black hat with dangling tassels and the appearance of what in some quarters be classified as peach fuzz grace his chin. The black chaps with fringe and the nagua black stiletto heels completed the ensemble. Slowly walking into the darkness, the stranger looks around and in a remarkably high pitched voice, warbles, "They call me Kid Shandorfff and I am the biggest baddest meanest cussedess son o bitch on these here parts. Why I am 9 and 3 in head to heads ( and the 3 only winged me) I am here calling ya out, you sorry cuusses, to see if I can add another notch to my guns here." With that the "Kid" slaps the leather holster at his side, a beautiful turned pearl handled revolver. Glaring at individuals he tromps through the bar. His murderous eyes glaring he bellows "How about you, Hiram boy?" The intended victim only slinks and slouches lower in his chair. Suddenly a voice cuts though the air like a knife sharpening a whetstone. "Leave the boy alone and pick on some one your better" Whirling in anger the stranger spies a figure in the corner. His long legs out stretched before him, his face shaded by his hats brim as he intently stares at a piece of wood he is whittling. His dusty stained clothes hang from his lanky frame loosely, and the salt and pepper hair peeks out from under his hat. The kid stomps over to him and towering over him spits. "what did you say old man?' "I said leave the boy alone. He can't do you any harm." "I suppose an old geezer like you could take me?" I reckin I might. I have taken out a few in my time. That is if I had a hankerin." "Look at you, you couldn't fight your way out of a french bordello" "Why would I want to, young fella" "You makin fun of me grandpa?" Shandorffff yells. "Seems like your doin quite fine yerself", the old-timer mutters. "That's it ya old gummy bird dog, I am taking ya out right".......... but before another word could issue from his throat the old man suddenly uncoiled like a rattler and was behind him, his bowie knife at his neck, the sharp blade pressing into his sweat marked neck. "Now, what was it yer was fixin to do?" he asked. "I suggest we go out side now and take care of this away from in here where some one might get hurt. Pushing the black clad figure out through the swinging doors, the old cowpoke stepped into the street. The Kid, for the first time was able to see the well oiled guns, the smooth and supple leather holster that obviously had been used over the years. A litheness and suppleness that belied the old codger that he had thought he was picking on. In that moment Shandorfffff felt a fear and uncertainty that he had not ever felt before. The old man spit out a toothpick that he had been chewing on. " In my day, they called us hired professionals, gunslingers who would take out the opposition at the drop of a retainer. A lawyer. Now let's see if ya know how to use that fancy hardware." Suddenly, a cold chill swept through the Kid's guts, an icy premonition of his own mortality, and lack of longevity. Here before him, like a reincarnation of Toshiro Mifune was one of the long forgotten Seven Lawyers. They had cut a path of devastation and created a trail of tears for so many that had the misfortune to cross their paths. The old man was speaking but he words seemed to penetrate slowly into his collapsing consciousness and as a warm liquid sensation ran down his legs under the frilled chaps to pool around his boots, Shandorffff made out, "You have only one thing to decide. Do you feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk?" ------------------ If frogs had uzi's, snakes woudn't mess with them so much. - Hiram [This message has been edited by jd (edited 01-18-2001).]

Jsffffffffffff Let's say we make that 9-5 hmmmmmmmmmmm? ------------------ If frogs had uzi's, snakes woudn't mess with them so much. - Hiram

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Polar: You guys need to wake up... a real conversation has just shot past you in total posts!<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Wake me when they get to 5,000, till then they aren't even close! ------------------ If frogs had uzi's, snakes woudn't mess with them so much. - Hiram [This message has been edited by jd (edited 01-18-2001).]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Check6: .. but I would appreciate a couple pats on the back anyway. Scrodam, stop that. I mean it, you filthy boy. Stop! /me runs from gross invasion of personal space...<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Yeah not a good idea to invite such actions. Mace and PNZ may misinterpret. Bauhaus will, and avoid Seanachai if he offers you coco and a backrub. ------------------ If frogs had uzi's, snakes woudn't mess with them so much. - Hiram

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Croda: As for my immortal soul, I am unique in the fact that I was born without one.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Ahem, need I say Berli and my status as a lawyer? So I'd say hardly unique. ------------------ If frogs had uzi's, snakes woudn't mess with them so much. - Hiram [This message has been edited by jd (edited 01-17-2001).]

Just to waste space and irritate the hell out of you all. who I despise, loathe and hate with every fiber of my being.....that being so have a nice day. In further news........dit dit dah.....pool update: Not a whole lot to say, but since I get paid by the hour and lbs of product, but I digress Frenchboy and The mad Hamster have finally resumed our matches. Paw is somewhere out there in a dank fetid darkness that means we will probably suffer more from friendly fire than inflicting it upon each other. The Hamsterboy had forgotten how bad his situation was. I must express also my surprise when I opened up my first file in months and beheld the plethora of targeting lines all directed at him. Hell I have so much artillery left that I can drop it on open terrritory because he might be there! Thecrudbeneathmyfeets is learning that having 6500 pts at your disposal does not translate into victory...esp if he is the general. To date his massed assault company has destroyed a pickett platoon. He has lost several Hellcats (iirc 3 since he hasn't sent aturn recently) and a Shermie that discovered my 5000 pts did allow for at LEAST 1 minefield! His lack of progress is even more questionable in that he has concentrated the whole of his material on1/2 the map. Spudy Stupid git bastard and I are going toe to toe in a valley with two VL's. I hold one, the other he is attempting to assault. A timely building fire sent one of his support squads scurrying, but his stupid bastard jagd IV is worrisome, esp since my remaining TD is awaiting the outcome of being suddenly uncovered by the old explode the building trick. TheCelticBard and I seem destined to pummel each other and not get an upper hand. He has the advantage in numbers, I have 2 AFV's to his (I believe) nil effectives. However he is grinding me down. Like our last game he seems unable to keep his armor in play. On the Downunder side Spaced is down to his last Chaffee (I have said that before!) and it is the last turn. The outcome is not in doubt but KT's can only go so far. Lizardboyo and I have just started rune's map of evil the "Cold Stream Guard" a river runs right through it with no bridges, it's damp so bogging is a problem. And in the inconsequential PShaw owes me a turn, Marletoad overwrote his 1.05 executable, whatever that is but penicillin does clear it up I hear, Pillboy has just started a mech ME and last and assurdley the very least, Mr. 666 seems a bit dilatory, one turn completed and I am awaiting a reply. He has ineffectively responded once on this thread, so unless he keeps investing here he shall not count. That is all ------------------ If frogs had uzi's, snakes woudn't mess with them so much. - Hiram [This message has been edited by jd (edited 01-17-2001).]

Now Elijah, a good southern name by the way,my father's from Oaklahoma, my mother from the Texas panhandle, why shoot there Elijah, growing up I was jd all along. Now my ex (from Texas), her aunts names were Louella Posey, Flossie Bell and Mattie Cad hell boy we all got two names. Since I have become just a simple country lawyer why I reckin some of thses big city folks, well....they gots their ways. Now the citified folk out there in Walla Walla, why we don't have much truck with their kind. My father was in the 87th Calvary recon (M8 howitzers - he was too big to fit in the Stuarts so he got to get out of them. Good move btw. Anyway, there they are in Normandy near St Lo durning the preparation for the breakout. His captain is shooting the breeze with him and says..."Maus, he drawled [i think he was from the ozarks] have ya ever had sheep. Ain't lived till you had sheep. (Mace, PNZ SITDOWN) True story, btw he hadn't and hasn't, at least that's what he told my mother, but there was this cute mme. he met in the south of france immed after the war...but that's another story. ------------------ If frogs had uzi's, snakes woudn't mess with them so much. - Hiram

Mike: Remember that we mac users handle mods entirely differently than the pc's. Unless someone wrote some apple script we have to loadd them up searately and it isn't easy to swap. In essence I would create an entire duplicate data folder with the desert mods installed. Also hope you can also have the large DL'd also available as those with DSL and cable modem can just click and load. jd

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by chrisl: Morsel-- did your secretary quit or something? The spelling, grammar, and general coherence of your written communications seem to be slipping lately.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> My dear Pissel Why do you think I HAVE a secretary. I certainly did not pledge my troth to the law as a demanding mistress because I could spell, type, or even knew what grammar is...... rather it's because I posses an ego that tolerates very little else and I like stomping little fuzzy helpless things... so Bugger off ya bucket of Pengish sputum. MeeklybuggeredbyaHamster what is this ****e? You go off to hump (or be humped) by penguins, return, and ignore your outstanding obligations. Now you are advertising for a TCP/IP buggering. Sir you have prior commitments that it is time for you to finish. I have allowed you sufficient time to bring your accounts current as they are seriously in arrears. Therefore, please be advised that under the terms of our arrangement I am accelerating the demand for repayment. All turns are hereby declared in default and immediately due and payable. To avoid further collection efforts you are requested to contact our office so that a suitable payment plan maybe instituted. At least the Frenchman has seen fit to begin to catch up his account. The fact that you are getting your little frenchified butt handed to you at the time of the disappearance may of course have something to do with it. Seanachai wrote of honor in the pool. Ha! Like I'd expect that of you, a deadbeat if ever I saw one. So get with it and send the next turn or I shall be forced to turn your account over to some of my "associates" Crodaligio and Hiram "Bambino" Sedai to look after my interests. jd ------------------ If frogs had uzi's, snakes woudn't mess with them so much. - Hiram [This message has been edited by jd (edited 01-16-2001).]

Croda asked if I could post this for him: "An Open Letter to the CessPool: By this letter I hope to convey two things to everyone: 1. I despise each and every one of you (except for Emma). 2. My net connection at work is jacked up like one Peter's sheep after he's been hitting the bottle. Basically, I do all of my postings from work. Little do they know that they are paying me to tell each of you that your respective levels of hygiene and intelliegence make moot all attempts at disguising the fact that you were all raised in the wild by particularly ill-mannered raccoons. But the issue here is not your vile odors, or the sniffing of trash cans that you so verily enjoy, the issue is my inablity to get to Battlefront.com, and thereby my home-away-from-home, the Muthabeautiful Peng Challenge Thread. It is not only disappointing to miss out on your horrid visages every morning, but it is absurdly unsettling to contemplate that I will now have to fill all 8 hours of my work day with work, lest I decide to see if I can read font-size 1 in Word with the naked eye. There is no joy in Mudville. I shall post no game updates in this letter, as they are all depressing save one or two, which are not depressing, but go far beyond that state and into a realm known best as 'self-mutilating.' Therefore, no updates here. I do however want to ensure everyone that my absence is in no way of a PawBroon-esque hiatus from the 'Pool, nor a Mensch-esque hiatus from reality, nor a Meeksian claim to be travelling to the Marianas where I shall dive to depths unimaginable and look for glowing fish and the aliens from 'The Abyss.' I am still a living, breathing member of this forum and especially this thread (if not it's lifeblood). I remain your Inner Croda, your Outer Whipping Boy, and your All Around Nuisance. I will essai to post from home, but unfortunately Battlefront's speed is terrible at best from my house. Posting a message has all the quickness of the damned Polar Bear who we payed to chase down and devour old Elijah. I will continue to play my games as poorly as in the past, and will hold onto dalem's dog's ears as they comfort me when I am lonely for the 'Pool. Now, I am sure that my detractors will see fit to taunt me heretically in my absence, as the yellow cowards that they continue to be, however I say to them: 'Stop it!' and I highly suggest they listen. I would also like to put before the 'Pool that the next two ridiculously annoying newcomers who venture in with an eye towards settling down be forced to play each other for the 'Pool's collective enjoyment on a sadistic map known best as 'Crodaburg.' It is similar to the epic battle of the Hornburg, except for the fact that everything about it is entirely different and the names have been changed to protect the innocent, none of which were present. So until such point as things clear up here (could be tommorrow or never), my contractor ass gets shipped elsewhere, or I convince my wife that more bandwidth =faster shopping, I am screwed. I will continue to check in on you however, so feel free to despise me in my absence, and I will make valiant and heroic attempts at hating you from home on occasion. Yours, Croda And how 'bout them Raidahs!"

Maced quit humpin yer dingo or do you call it a shelia and get your digeridoo out of your backside and send back your death knell turn ye useles wanker. Shesh you have better things to do than the tag the walls, now chop chop get on it and Die alot™ Oops sorry you can only die alittle™ because your tanks are bye bye. ------------------ If frogs had uzi's, snakes woudn't mess with them so much. - Hiram [This message has been edited by jd (edited 01-14-2001).]

Well I see Rodentacedsteve (hey like those incisors boy) saved me from having to resurrect this thread from slipping to page 2. I am here at work on a drizzly Sat morning and truly loathing and despising you all. That eternal squire (no never shall he rise above his lowly state) Croda and I are engaged in a Battalion (plus) sized battle. He has chosen to attack and is getting a warm welcome. This last turn he said my tactics are the same as Shandorful's. Some how I do not feel better knowing that. Ser Cruda has learned that hvy arty falling in woods over his troops can be hazardous to his health. His attack seems to be getting a little off their time table. Seannychai seems to have reverted to his standard tactics of bleating for me to "JUST DIE" because he seems unable to manage it himself. Mr 666 has started our game with parking his trucks, loaded with infantry out in the wide open spaces. Hmmm I wonder what I can do with that? Everyone else owes me a turn, so get with it you putrescent scum, hell I know you are dog**** under my shoes but get on the stick. ------------------ If frogs had uzi's, snakes woudn't mess with them so much. - Hiram [This message has been edited by jd (edited 01-13-2001).]

*pmub*

Chuckles666 and I have begun our game. There I said it, the shame is to great. In a moment of weakness I let my manners get the best of me. Then again, perhaps it is because I like tender fresh youngsters to introduce in to the ways of the pool. He sent me a 800 pt mech ME, low (read flat like Croda's cranium) and light trees. Course he failed to tell me the conditions till after I had picked my forces. The VL is out in the open..... I have a bad feeling about this. Unless he shows up here I will treat it as an abberation and non pool game and will speak no more of Mr 666 until such time as he presents himself for rituall scourging. I heartily endorse Meekly Weekly's suggestion to sic the wannabees on each other..... so Chuckie if you want to play in the pool.....front and center. In the I am waiting category..... I await Speakswithloudmouth to resume our interrupted game as well as Grenouillefacedboy Their presence has been noted, and my loathing grows which can only be expurgated in ritual flaying and flagellation. As to you other sods, if you haven't gotten a turn in the last few days, let me know as I think I must be using PShaw's isp. May you all find little Crodas and Hiram's crawling in your beds tonight. ------------------ If frogs had uzi's, snakes woudn't mess with them so much. - Hiram [This message has been edited by jd (edited 01-12-2001).]

man deja deja...more to follow. Okay, the room has stopped spinning. Meeks in charge. Why the hell not. A little responsibilty may make the man. Well prob not. But it is now on his watch. I have noticed that with a fresh start a number of drive bys stop in. Well get the feck out. Start your own mutha beautiful theread. Maybe I'll be lucky and that feckless bump on the arse of a victim of Mace's predations Chuckles will not find his way here. I should be so blessed. Oh well, whipping the Olivers as they ask for more, to break then into the mysteries of the pool seems to be my lot. However, if he doesn't make a presence here, it'll be expunged from pool conciousness ------------------ If frogs had uzi's, snakes woudn't mess with them so much. - Hiramy [This message has been edited by jd (edited 01-12-2001).]

Manx's Combat Missions at http://WWW.COMBATMISSIONS.CO.UK/ has a bmp list

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Check6: Okay, JD. I have taken far too much crap from you already.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>No you haven't. I have alot more disdain where that came from. <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR> Shall we make a wager? If you manage to beat me, (unlikely; you post like somebody masking a bit of a CM inferiority complex... panzer envy?), I will consider myself "in it for the long hall." I will probably find myself in the position of to Cesspool Whipping Boy, but I'll stay in this damnable place for the long "hall". Should I give you the ass-beating you so richly deserve, I will have the prerogative to leave immediately, should I so choose. And you'll have to go lure another whipping boy into your fetid lair. And should my offer be declined, your brand-new whipping boy is gone as of now. You'll probably have to answer to Croda for that one; he seems to have taken a strange kind of liking to me, but hey... that's your choice.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>What you may not realize upChuckles is that I sponsored Croda, shag his mum and beat the snot out of him. To have him take an interest in you is like telling Peter you feel baaaaaaaaaaaad today. Stay or go it doesn't matter to me. But can you amuse me. Well since you obviously cannot do it here there is only one place to find out. Look for it tonight. I suppose it is our sacred duty to take pity on the haplessly deformed and genetically altered malaprop that you have shown yourself to be. Why do I think that when this is over I will feel dirty like being seen sneaking into a 42 St peep show? But then Croda and Hiram are already there I suppose. No doubt Bauhaus is the wizened gnome behind the dirty and smudged glazing, the smoke from his cigarette whispering around his yellowed and cracked fingertips to pool momentarily around his head. His beady rheummy and squinty eyes carrying no sign of sentience tracks Chucky escorting him down the long hall the cackling rising from some tubercular cavern as he slides the key to room #12 under the window. ------------------ If frogs had uzi's, snakes woudn't mess with them so much. - Hiramy [This message has been edited by jd (edited 01-11-2001).]

Ahh we have had hamsters, kniggits and now the latest and greatest.......42nd street and/or Times Square

Hicupchup: xoxoxoxo

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Hiram Sedai: I'm stuck with Christmas trees and snowmen. I was slightly inebriated when I installed that mod and now I can't show trees when its snows because of how distracting they are. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Hiram you DID save them didn't you?! Sigh, prob not. There is a list of bmp's posted at Manx's Combat Missions site at http://WWW.COMBATMISSIONS.CO.UK/bmplist.htm try there to see what ones. Or just reload the bmp's from the orig mod download. I always keep a copy of the original downloads after I install them so if in a drunken spasm of mod mixing and alcohol I can restore them.

bah humbug [This message has been edited by jd (edited 01-11-2001).]