Croda

Mmmmm...turnips and wine... That's one helluva combo. Right up there with Beer and tunafish, pretzels and kerosene, and Mace and a hot bath.

Damned German skrewing up his spelling...again. Don't you fret. I won't be looking to take your seat next to Bauhaus.

Meeks? A King? And of the Cesspool nonetheless? We've got enough problems with a Justagrog. What this town needs is an Emperor, and I hereby nominate and second myself. I appreciate you all attending my coronation and would have it known that all those opposing me shall be exiled to that Elba-esque island known as the CMBO forum. Meeks...what a tosser.

Whoever said that Acid went out of style?

Boo-Boo Let me tell you what I like about you: Well, there you have it. More witicisms later. Hey Hiram Go play in traffic. Love, Croda

Oddie-Jeff The fact that you beat me on that egg-carton of a map means nothing. I will be happy to hand you the piece of your ass I saved before. As for Egg-Shen and Malheureusement, I've never heard of you and wouldn't remember your names if you plumetted from atop a 50 story building and made modern art at my feet.

That's rather poetic. Ever consider a career in killing yourself?

And the line forms right behind me. </font>

THIS JUST IN: I may (or may not - my preference you slack-ass) be requesting games and doling out bushels of misery in the very near future. The line to begin larnin' yer lessins begins here: <---------------------------------------------->

Any Auburn fans/grads out there, I'll be remembering you on my: People to soon become shat upon list. Hate you damn dirty bastages. I hope you all get boiled in your own jelly.

Hey. Been busy sodding-off. It's really not as bad as you lot made it out to be. Don't bother replying. I can't check this website from work anyway...damned Super Scout... Merry Christmas and happy viewings of Two Towers, you happy bunch of tossers.

Thanks to a nice guy at Aberdeen who saved my email from February, I got this in my mail today: GOOD NEWS! APG IS NOW ACCESSIBLE TO THE GENERAL PUBLIC You can now visit the Ordnance Museum at Aberdeen Proving Ground. The Proving Ground has instituted a day pass for individuals that do not have military or U.S. Government I.D. The Museum will be open 7 days a week from 9:00am to 4:45 pm. We will be closed National Holidays except for Armed Forces, Memorial, Independence and Veterans Days. The Day Pass will be issued only at the “Maryland Ave. Gate”. This gate is on Rt. 715. The Rt. 22 gate will not issue any passes. To get to the correct gate from I-95: Exit onto Rt. 22 going towards Aberdeen, Exit to Rt. 40 West (right turn), proceed on Rt. 40 through the city of Aberdeen to the exit for Aberdeen Proving Ground (Rt. 715 South). Proceed to the security gate, park in the visitors parking and go to the visitor center with your driver’s license and car registration. Tell the security personnel you are going to visit the Ordnance Museum. You will receive a Visitor’s Pass that will allow you to visit the museum only. You are not authorized to drive to other areas of APG. Proceed straight to the museum parking lot. Just thought I'd pass this along to those of you in the north-east.

I am Croda, hear me roar. (Just in case you forgot) My chosen place of business has also seen fit to block Battlefront.com using its newest toy :SuperScout, may it meet Tantalus in Hades. As such, I can only post from home, where I am usually playing games, watching football, or downloading Chasey Lain movies on Kazaa. What's that mean? Thank the maker I chose to bless you with my presence this evening.

Hey, you guys play this game too? How odd...

Ahh...Hiram's cat must have been taking a nap and he had no one else to play with but his keyboard. The list of sycophants of The Nefarious Legion of Croda™ is long and distinguished, much like the rollcall of lice in your hair. Foghorns such as yourself merely serve as a reminder that there is something roaming around out in the haze, though it poses no threat - merely an annoying sound in an otherwise peaceful existence. Hiram you are such a genetic abberation that I suggest you do science a favor and move yourself to the Galapagos so that you can be studied as a perfect example of how genetic mutation can bring about entirely new lines of pseudo-mammals. Forked tongue, webbed toes, beady and close-set eyes, horrific stench emanating from over-productive sweat glands, long and umkempt mane, and the inability to breed with other mammals: that is indeed the resume of a hiram-sapiens. I saw one at the Baltimore Zoo a couple of weeks ago. It was odd how people loved and took pictures of all the animals but the hiram-sapiens. This disgusting sloth-like pleuro-pod merely sat in the corner of it's cage trying to shield itself from the barrage of soda bottles and loose stones being hurled at it by the zoo patrons. 'Why do you hate the Hiram so? Surely it does not deserve beating such as this, good zoo patrons!' I entreated the populace. 'Would you look at it? Just look at it! Such a creature laying claim to humanity lessens humanity for the rest of us. We will destroy that Hiram for the sake of the world's children!' a young school-girl informed me. 'Well, for the sake of the world's children. I suppose I cannot argue that point,' I condeded, as to defend the Hiram at this point would be to stand against the children of the world. 'Will you join us then, good sirrah?' the youngster inquired. 'I believe that children are our future. Teach them well and let them lead the way. Show them all the beauty they possess inside and that when they come across things with no beauty (like this hideous Hiram here) - destroy those things.' With that, I picked up a rock and threw it at the Hiram, hitting it in the left eye which subsequently exploded, spewing ocular fluid all over the cage and the crowd rejoiced.

I wonder which is which... [ August 22, 2002, 01:10 PM: Message edited by: Croda ]

Hiram, you tell Beth to keep at it. Obviously her way is working if she's still got all that spunk left. I'm glad to hear she's still fighting. As for the hair, there are a number of us here who can vouch for the fact that it's not as important as we make it out to be.

That is Mr. Pillock to you Alfalfa .[/QB]</font>

Get your mothergrabbin' lips off of my ass, boy-o! Your noobiosity is showcased by the four handles you've placed together in ignoble chuminess. MrPeng is an Olde One™ and eternal. Yours Truly is a Senior Knight full of piss and vinegar, but not nearly low enough in member number to sit with the Olde Ones. Marlow is a...what the hell is Marlow anyway? I remember when he showed up, but I thought he left to play twitch games. Oh wait, that was me. Simon. Who the hell is Simon and why should I give a flying Frenchman? It is obvious that the better part of you is still a light-colored stain in the back of some Chevy Nova. You've got the wit of Dr. Joyce Brothers, and I imagine the vericose veins to match. If you are not the biggest waste of ATP in this forum, then Rob/1 must be back to visit. Send Boo Radley the following setup or face a Crodaburg™ challenge match with another SSN of the Pool's choosing: 700 pt Attack Allies - you - French Inf - Defending Axis - Boo - Mech - Attacking June, Light Rain, Small Hills, Light Woods Any parameters I missed, make them up and put yourself at a disadvantage.

Yes, please use Hiram as never would he be more useful than as an immovable object for taping SSNs to. While you're at it, slap some duct tape over his mouth too, and tape all of his fingers together. That will keep him quiet and ensure that the drivel he'll post with his two big duct-taped clubs will be a little more manageable - the internet version of the typewriter lobotomy. I imagine he'll come out sounding like BASF, but not as bad as Yaknod. Justagrog, will you take absolutely anyone as squire? Paparoach? By the gods, he'd have trouble telling off the kindergardner who refuses to get off the swing at the end of recess. Someone take LordGay as squire as well if only so that we can make him and Paparoach play Crodaburg™. Marlow, you ****e-head, what's the deal with keeping that game? Never has there been a more lopsided battle since the Patriots played the Rams, I'll tell ya.

Hey, Terence, aren't you that guy I obliterated in something like 9 sraight PBEMs? I was certain you would have killed yourself by now. You may even be worse than dalem.

Well, looky here. To answer the question: I am Croda and it appears that my presence has upset poor old Gaylord. I feel a mite bad about that, and so I've reconsidered my reappearance in the pool. Naturally, I've not changed my position, but I did think about it a bit. Well, not really. You see, Gay, may I call you Gay? How about Lord Gay? I like that better. You don't? Pity. You see, Lord Gay, this is a place where people come in and bust on each other and play CM (at least some of us do), and since you're from the homeland, I'll fill you in on the rest of the facts. People bust pretty hard, extra hard sometimes. As Seanachai in his infinite longwindedness has said, you're just not that good at it. Everyone here eventually develops a personality, your personality would still be described merely as 'annoying.' Now that's not a bad thing, everyone needs time to develop. Just look at Kurt Warner. Don't know who Kurt Warner is? Then Sod Off at the double-quick, if you please. Now that accomplished, I give you these three suggestions which may or may not number three depending on when I stop typing: 1) The best that you can do is give as much as you take. 2) While doing number one (on the list, you potty-minded dullard) make sure that you are not posting just to read your own ignorant monologue. Be interesting, literate, speak in babelfish, juggle cranberries, be short and snappy, only use Saturday Night Live catch phrases, refer to parsley in ever post, or something that gives you character. 3) Remember that we've been doing this for a while, many longer than I have, and we take a great deal of pride and find a great deal of camaraderie among the other sick minds of the world who congregate here. So if we act a little stuffy and guarded about such paltry things as The Rules™, then just play along and understand that history is as important to us as Seinfeld re-runs are to you. 4) Made you look. And Emma, jumping to my defense. How sweet of you...

Croda, I realize that your brain has gone all soft and mushy from having to try and translate the noises coming from the fresh larva you've spawned. Quick, someone get the roach powder. But it takes two to finish a game, you oaf. Were it not for me, constantly driving him on, infuriating him, he'd have never done it. By mocking each missed shot, and laughing every time he lost yet another vehicle, I kept him going. That, and the thought of burying his 5 iron in your skull when we finished. A man's got to have goals, donchaknow.</font>

Are you still here? Really, you don't have to type something. Perhaps some Immodium salve on your hands would stop the spewing you call "participating."</font>

You're right, I did. There, fixed it. Just looked at your profile... Please tell me you are not really from Massachusetts...</font>