Seanachai

I shall immediately do so, after I finish setting a new direction for the Church, given my presumptive ascension to the Papacy.

Is that an uptown address? Michael </font>

MAN, THIS TIME AROUND, THE INQUISITION IS GOING TO BE SO INCREDIBLY TRIPPY! We're going to combine 'Papal Bull' with the 'Popul Voh'! We're going to get it right, this time! [ April 04, 2005, 10:46 PM: Message edited by: Seanachai ]

'Course it has! Can't have an Apocalypso without the rise of a false Pope, now, can we? Call me Peter!

When I am Pope, my first act will be to do a tour of...Australia! Yes, Australia! God commands me to go to Australia! There I will do mighty works to convert the heathens, and bring them all into the fold. AND WE WILL HAVE THE LARGEST, MOST PISSED BARBECUE THE WORLD HAS EVER KNOWN! WE WILL BAPTIZE THE HEATHENS IN VIC BITTER, TASMANIAN ALES, AND THOS. COOPER AND SONS STOUT! I will create a number of new Bishoprics, and Mace and Goanna will be Top Aussie Archbishops! 'The Lord is my Shepherd' will take on a whole, new, horrible meaning!

We all do, Berli. But remember, he's not gone. He's doing some 17 year old girl in Prague, last time I heard from him. It's hard to keep the Evil Undead down. Ask the 17 year old.

SATAN IS WITH US! ALROIGHT, GIVE IT UP FOR SATAN! If this isn't the beginning of an Activist, Hands-On, Coalition Papacy, then WHAT BLOODY WELL IS?!!

Quick! Where is Cardinal Boo?! Come, Radley! It's time for my Presumptive Assumption! Wait, I think I meant: Preemptive Ascension! I'll give 'em 'white smoke'! When I'm Pope, there'll be 'white smoke' for everyone!

If elected, I will do for the Papacy what Rasputin did for Monasticism.

OH, YEAH! I'M GONNA HAVE ME A BIG HAT! A REALLY, REALLY BIG SODDING HAT! AND NO COWS! AND ACCESS TO THE FINEST PERUVIAN FLAKE, FAT, RESIN SLICK BUDS OF COLUMBIANO, AND ALL THE 'FDA, WE DON'T NEED NO STEENKING FDA' PHARMACEUTICALS THAT THE IMMENSE POWER OF THE VATICAN CAN POUR INTO MY PALSIED, TWISTED, GRASPING LITTLE HANDS! YEAH! IT'S GOOD TO BE THE POPE! You ever been to Vatican City? I mean, you walk through closet after room after building filled with gold, silver, and priceless works of art. IF THAT'S POVERTY, BABY, BRING ON THE CELIBACY! And Peng, why should we abuse the Homeless? After all, the Poor are what keeps the whole edifice going! WE'RE GOING TO EAT THE RICH, CHILDREN! IT'LL BE A BLOODY SACRAMENT!

And believe me, as I sit there in the 'popemobile', surrounded by the adoration of tens of thousands of cheering, chanting, pumped-up Catholics, I will be RIPPED RIGHT STRAIGHT TO THE TITS! YOWZA!

The Way Before Me is finally clear! Hunter S. Thompson is dead, and the Papacy is open. NOW IS MY TIME! FINALLY, THE BEGINNING OF THE WORLD'S FIRST GONZO PAPACY! I can't wait to see Ralph Steadman's artwork of my first ride through cheering crowds in the 'popemobile'...

Will you be supporting my bid for the Papacy, Peng?

Of course I never married. It would have disqualified me from being the next Pope. What do you think we're living in, the 1500s?!

Right. There is something unquestionably wrong with the title 'Justicaress'. It shall never be used again, upon pain of death.

Over the sea on the wings of a dove. Alright, you'll have a setup by Thursday, or whenever I can find enough cheap beer to sedate the sense of horror I feel every time I have to associate with yet another of you Commonwealth thugs, who besmirch the very concepts of 'honour' and 'glory' and 'animal husbandry'.

I've been stripping paint. I find that Aussie wine works the best. It'll even corrode lead based paint. Gods know it's even done a fair job of attempting a punch up with my liver.

Dammit, Dorosh! What thread about Volksgrenadiere?! And what about Volksgrenaderie? Were they as cool and elite as Waffengrenaderie? Did they have - the Schiznitz?!

Don't toy with me, Michael! Oh my God! Could it be true? My heart is pounding so hard it feels like it's going to explode right out of my chest!

Cheese is Bliss. Just ask Emrys. Oh, and if he brings out the cheese tray when you visit, avoid anything that seems 'unusually runny'...

From the title, I thought this would be about 'being intimate with a woman', and that Grog Dorosh was starting topics under an alias...

Bah! The sight of sober one would destroy you utterly. </font>

Umm...I thought you were a Finn?

Bah! The sight of sober one would destroy you utterly.

'I am a bright, shining star and the last best hope for all mankind.' Do you like it? It's my new mantra.