Hakko Ichiu

Oh, now it decides to post. This board is as creaky as a sheep stall once Mace gets in.

Hmm, the board seems to have eaten my gamey update. How strange. I hope it doesn't get indigestion. Those of you that owe me fecking turns, send fecking turns. You know who you are, Andreas.

So there I was, thinking to myself (have to maintain the quality level, given the company in the 'Pool), "Self, several persons or entities owe me turns. Lets do an enumeration: - MrSpkr, who is suddenly finding out what it is like to be embraced by large numbers of ÜberFinns. - Geier, who thinks that he is winning, when he's just making a lot of noise. - Jo Xia, but is anyone really surprised? - Andreas, who is probably too busy counting the roadwheels on a Volkspanzerkraftgeschirrspüler 42(a)[$] Ausf. 12E59 to send a fecking turn. On the other hand, Self, Seanachai is being remarkably punctual. Perhaps that is because he is dying-alot-now. Which is as it should be." Tra la, tra lee.

Please don't regale us with tales of how beaucoup your member is. It's a direct violation of the Rules. Or, as they say in the rougher parts of Chiba, kinjiyagaru, zo! Now, since you have refused to do what is right and proper for an SSN, to whit, sodding off, I am forced to use harsher methods. Since you are of that reviled sub-human species known as a Yalie (or Eli), there is one sure way to get rid of you: drumroll He must be a Yale man, I can tell by his skull and bones! drumroll Thank you and goodnight!

Japanese. Unfortunately, I am not aware of any insults or rude sayings attributable to bears in that language. The term "bear" does have a particular meaning in certain sociological sub-groups in this country. Are you by any chance large, bearded, and fond of wearing lumberjack-style clothes? I was going to break into a jolly singsong of that famous ditty, "The Freshmen Up at Yale", but I couldn't remember the exact lyrics to the verse about sophomores. A google turned up empty. Any one know the words? It would be a shame if this one went unsung, given the circs.

I believe it is primarily wrist injuries. In other news, all turns are out. Some of my opponents have gone MIA. These include Geier and Seanachai. If for some reason you think I owe you a turn, do let me know. I would hate to think that your death is being postponed in error.

This has been part of CM since the beginning: At least the GIs had the courtesy to give a reach-around.

Stop it! Bad enough to have the Yarble-less One trolling the Outer Boards, but when the Powers That Be™ start doing it, it's time to scream "abuse of authority." Have you no decency, man?!?

A famous wrestler in turn of the century Imperial Russia. He was the first teacher of Joseph "The Mighty Atom" Greenstein.

In wood and wild, ye warbling throng, Your heavy loss deplore; Now, half extinct your powers of song, Sweet Echo is no more. Ye jarring, screeching things around, Scream your discordant joys; Now, half your din of tuneless sound With Echo silent lies. - Robert Burns, Epitaph on a Lap Dog Named Echo

All current turns are out. Those of you who were waiting with bated breath, or in the Gnome's case, breadth, you may rejoice in the knowledge that your deaths at my hands continue in their balletic perfection. Those of you who owe me fecking turns, and you know who you are (except, perhaps, Geier, whose total lack of self-knowledge is the talk of all the sex shops in Stockholm [no, Bauhaus, not that kind of self-knowledge]), send me a fecking turn. Feck. Oh, and another thing, feck! Drink! Arse! That would be an ecumenical matter!

How is this different from normal?

Ho hum, another exemplar of Shavian "wit" and "humor". Ho hum. I'm cutting the old reprobate some slack because he is, in our little spat, dying-alot-now™.

I thought it was for the white sheets and fried okra on Friday nights.

Oh, I'd say things are getting quite sanguinary in our little contretemps, wouldn't you. Of course, if you really want to see blood, gore, and the futility of human action, see my current uncivil litigation against MrSpkr. Seanachai is playing "Laughing Gnome" in the snows of Russia. Whether he'll still be squeaking, "Ha ha ha. Hee hee hee," in a few minutes remains to be seen. Geier is staving off defeat through the ingenious expedient of not sending turns. Andreas is doing likewise, although not before giving me a 105mm going away present. Some outerboarder is playing me too. At the current rate, he'll be getting a little visit from his Political Commisar, and not before time.

You feckin idjit, price is always the issue. Gaylord, go out and buy the cheapest frickin monitor you can find. You can get a 14" for $100. That'll save you $449 over the one the above idjit wants you to buy. Don't worry about resolution or dots per inch or viewable area or any of that other technical mumbo-jumbo that nobody understands. It's all smoke and mirrors I tell ya. Just take the savings and blow it all on Booker's. Then sit back and enjoy. All your apps will look great. </font>

It's in his contract. Right, paint the sand yellow again.... </font>

It looks like someone hit Gerard Depardieu with an ugly-stick until he cried. [NB: Until recently, scientists thought it would violate the laws of physics to make Depardieu any uglier. Behold, another scientific limit superseded.] Is that a finger in his pocket or is he just happy to be in the 'Pool?

This doesn't have anything to do with the Japanese mentality thread on the Outer Boards, does it? [ October 28, 2002, 04:54 PM: Message edited by: Hakko Ichiu ]

[administrative]Everyone to whom I owe a turn should now have said turn. If by some chance there is still someone to whom I owe a turn, sound off now. Anyone who owes me a turn (Andreas, MrSpkr, Jo Xia), send me a fecking turn.[/administrative] Baby monitors are a wonderful thing. They let you know exactly when your child is coughing at 2:00 in the morning. This allows you to share in the experience and increase the strength of the child-parent bond. At least that is what I am going to tell the jury when, in a fit of sleep deprivation, I render myself a childless bachelor once more. Feck off the lot of you.

And there was great rejoicing.

Because, as an Olde One, the secrets of the universe are open to me. Or, I could say I am not as dense as thou. Besides, I kinda like this one. I make him a serf</font>

We ask ourselves the same thing.

So, as is fitting, I have come up with an anthem truly worthy of the 'Pool, the Mutha-Beautiful Thread That Will Always Be There. I think it only appropriate that it is written to the tune of "O, Canada!", although there is no requirement to yell, "Face Off!" at its conclusion: Peng Challenge Thread! Our wondrous cyber-home! Cess sucks us in wherever we may roam. We taunt and jest at SSNs, With serfs we do make free. We'll ne'er forsake our sacred 'Pool Our dear, old MBT. Refrain: Peng Challenge Thread! for eternity We live to taunt, we live to taunt in thee Peng Challenge Thread, we live to taunt in thee Peng Challenge Thread! Where insults shine like jewels. Our Justicar commands that all shall read the Rules. The Olde Ones carp, the Knights discourse The Ladies dance and sing But none shall jest about their pair For it don't mean a thing! Refrain: Peng Challenge Thread! etc. Peng Challenge Thread! Forever may you reign! Your Knights exist to cause their squires pain. The clueless noobs we treat with scorn. "Do sod off," we command. But those whose taunts cause true offense We gladly take in hand. Refrain: Peng Challenge Thread! etc.

Geier and I are at hazard. Déja vu all over again really. An anthem, eh? Let me turn my thoughts toward this one.