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MrSpkr

HO HO HO! Here comes Peng with his bag full of Challenges!

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"If I were a hammer..."

I'd despair to not find a bit of backbone here in the MBT to drive home. However, If you buy me a drink, I'll be happy to accompany you ALL the way home. Why are you fondling me? EEeewwww, I'm not that type of kanniget, you putrescent pile of pustulated pox! (and where-ever did that Deke Fentle get to, anyway? I was finally starting to kick his ass (one out of 5 ain't so bad) when he disappeared (or was that despaired)).

Ah, a haphazard Sodd Off! to the lot of you.

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<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

Oh and Stuka, I've created a mission in IL-2 in your honor ... a couple of green JU-87s get bounced by my Mig3U. Unfortunately the bloody things have rear gunners (who'd have thought) and they are bloody good. Each time I've been shot down in flames and I've managed to kill exactly ONE <hr></blockquote>

That would have been the combined talent of Oberleutnants Jolie and..... the other one..... the one with the big hooters....... oh, I can't remember her name but she is a bloody good shot.

Anyhoos, during the after battle, er...de-briefing, in between sweaty bouts of breathy nude twister, the girls did inform me of one poxy little Mig that approached from (of course) the rear.

As I was occupied doing what champion Stuka pilots do, it was up to my dual rear gunners to take care of aircraft defense. As it was, they reported that a pale, somewhat overweight russian pilot clumsely waddled into a sort of half-arsed killing position until the tunic stretching 'assets' of my gunners came into veiw and filled (and I mean filled) the poor sod's gunsight.

According to the ladies' report, the pilot's eyeballs hit the glass of his flying goggles, his tongue knocked the oxygen mask fron his face as it dripped saliva into his lap and his hand began working furiously on the joystick, an action which we believe caused enough hesitation in his firing pattern to allow the girls to get the first shot in.

Works every time.

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Richards! Thats the other one, Oberleutnant Richards, how could I forget?

Oh and Mace, there'l be no photos for you as that is classified information.

My setup for you is coming along slowly, bloody nighttime and foggy too. Feh!

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<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Leeo:

"If I were a hammer..."

<hr></blockquote>

You'd actually have achieved something like utility, doubled your IQ, and sent nails across America rejoicing over their liberation.

Now, be a good lad, and attempt to rise to your level of competence, and imagine yourself as a tree stump, or Strom Thurmond.

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<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

Right then, this whole Croda you suck! ... Huh uh, YOU suck Hiram! merry go round is just about more than I, or anyone else, wants to hear. If you MUST continue with this tiresome over and over and over repetitive potty taunting, at least include something about the game so that we know that you're not just recycling posts from 18 months ago.

Joe

[ 12-27-2001: Message edited by: Joe Shaw ]<hr></blockquote>

Now, Joe, while I admit that the level of taunting has been...limp, to say the least, I just want to say that I'm very glad to see Hiram here, posting and taunting again in his own jolly way, not to mention the return of that awful sod, Croda.

Do you remember how long it took, how much cajoling, how much reassurance it took to get Hiram to attempt to taunt at all?

Now, while I do think their recent exchange was rather long on scatology, and markedly short on wit (although I admit to a definite guilty chuckle over Hiram's remark about his cat repeating Croda's name into his shoes; anyone else notice that Hiram uses his cat to good effect, in general?), we have to take some comfort in their return to us.

Also, while they abuse each other, they're gainfully employed, and not annoying anyone else.

As for you two rascals, we of the Peng Challenge Thread are delighted with your return. You fill a need previously met by a number of 4x4 wooden balks . These can now be more gainfully employed as witty conversationalists.

Anyone else notice how during the Holiday associated with Family and Religion, most Thread regulars were here and posting constantly, but now, as we approach the Holiday associated with drunken excess, the posts have dwindled down to repetetive posting by the Australians (for whom New Year's Eve is just another encounter with police, barristers, and the rest of their drinking buddies)?

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<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Seanachai:

the posts have dwindled down to repetetive posting by the Australians (for whom New Year's Eve is just another encounter with police, barristers, and the rest of their drinking buddies)?<hr></blockquote>

But at least we are not freezing our cajoles off in a -35 degree Stalingradesk hell, in fact, mine have sweated off.......oh yes, here they are, they've rolled under Peng's sofa, right next to an old pizza box and an issue of 'Sports illustrated Swimsuit edition' (strangely hardened, probably with age), best put these back on promptly,...arrrghh..... urrrggghh..... ahhh there we are, best not keep the tail gunners waiting eh?

Whats that? Oh, Anglelina we can't, the guys are here, I don't want to make them jealous.

I'm sorry Denise, did you say what I thought you said? You want to do what to your fellow tail gunner? For my pleasure? Well, I don't know if I should...oh, yes, go on then.............

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<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Yeknodathon:

Wibble

Yeknod<hr></blockquote>

Yes, yes, your ability to play upon such classic pieces of siliness as 'Black Adder' does not go unnoticed.

What is under scrutiny, however, is your actual goddamn ability to pick someone out, Challenge them, and taunt them in the way of getting a game.

Now, as far as I remember, 'Yeknodathon' is one of those Hebrew festivals that fell into disfavour when they couldn't get enough Prophets and Elders to sign up for guest appearances and cameos for the fund-raiser.

You look to be going the same way, lad, as you're not gaining any real support here on the Peng Challenge Thread.

Quite possibly it's because you haven't made any real effort to take a read on your potential opponents here, and get a grasp, however aimless, on what is needed to both sneer at them, and interest them in playing you.

Don't be afraid, lad, to admit that you're almost magically half-witted, in awe of even the most apparently useless of our membership, and embarassed by the fact that you don't seem capable of walking in here, looking one of our (lesser) members straight in the eye, and stating:

Here, xxxx, I think you're a bit of damp underwear, and will be difficult to wash out! My tactical abilities far surpass my taunting, and I would prove it to you on the field of battle! Although I am almost completely useless, I wish to be regarded as one amongst the not completely useless, and therefore I have sat up all night long, and composed a special taunt, just for you! Now, then, person of more worth than I can presently aspire to, what say you to a batttle?

In the Peng Challenge Thread we jest. We mock. We taunt. But we play.

And why do we play? Because Combat Mission gives us the Challenge of Steel. Because it gives us the ability to meet each other in honourable combat. Because it is the Chess of the 21st century, where warriours brood on turns, and fling insults between them.

If you can't get behind that, then run off and post on boards reserved for those who are neither opponents, nor warriours.

We mock. We belittle. We Taunt. Because we Play.

If you've no Challenge to make, then piss off. This isn't a thread to profile your mother's lack of evolutionary competence.

We're more than ready to accept a bastard, here. But only one with something to contribute.

[ 12-30-2001: Message edited by: Seanachai ]</p>

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<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Seanachai:

You'd actually have achieved something like utility, doubled your IQ, and sent nails across America rejoicing over their liberation.<hr></blockquote>

Short, sweet and brutally to the point... are you trying to become me?

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